Timothy M.

I think you can get away with a couple of non-dramatic chapters where they just slowly connect again and spend time with each other and the family and maybe a few friends. We don't have to have drama in every chapter, so don't worry about not being inspired. Anything you write is sure to be fun to read.

Well turns out that Daniel's rule about no alcohol in the rooms was rather sensible. Look what happened when Sam broke it: Daniel had non-consent sex including losing his virginity in pain to a selfish, horny, inconsiderate jerk who left him alone afterwards. I don't like Sam, and I hope Daniel gets rid of him asap. But I have the feeling that this story unfortunately is going in a different direction with a romance between Sam and Daniel after a few complications.

Hope CJ's lawyers sue the hell out of the TV station or get them punished some other way (e.g. by sending bad press their way) - this is one time when having lots of money is going to be really useful. Please do something clever and vindictive and let us have all the details, I love it when hateful media gets kicked where it hurts (money and image).

Finally, finally - and you actually made me feel sorry for Cole and understand why he was so messed up for a long time. But at least he managed to confess and Dale was still interested, what a relief. Glen and Jer being together was a major surprise, but such fun too. But such a shame they managed to interrupt just at that moment. Not just for the loverbirds, but for us too :-)

Arrgh, I just knew it, not only are Cole and Jeremy totally jealous of each other, but Glen makes his move at completely the wrong time and messes things up even more. Poor Dale, I can understand why he gets angry and walks off, but I wish he had stayed and let Cole explain. It's obvious he is trying to admit something important.

Jeremy is gay !!! - now that was a total surprise to me, though I now realize that you've put a hint or two in previous chapters. Oh man that can really complicate things, especially as Dale is actually attracted to Jer - who has the added advantage of being his best friend. I still want Cole to win but I feel sorry for Jer, cause I like him more and more as the story progresses. Took a lot of guts to come out and admit his feelings and do his best not to make Dale feel bad about it.

Yeah I agree, very hot - and I wish they would admit how attracted they really are to each other. But I guess this is where the whole beard thing will mess up their relationship. Oh, well at least they got some nice pictures out of the first session. And cool with the whole media thing, such a clever argument and just what I think too. More tolerance seems to be lacking in the world - and especially when mixed up with religion. I find it deeply ironic that (US) Christian zealots have homophobia in common with Muslims who are otherwise their arch enemies.

Probably one of the most emotional chapters of the story yet written in such a way that it is neither sentimental nor unbelievable that Dale goes through this catharsis (maybe too strong a word, but he does suddenly see his past and his dad in a wholly new way). And the reward is that he gets to be part of the football team, which is sure to be good for all of them. Oh and great to see a football coach portrayed as a intelligent and sensitive being rather than the stereotype we other get in these gay teen stories. Oh and the the little surprise about the interview gets tagged on the end, leaving us out of breath with all the whirlwind changes in Dale's life. This story gets better with every new chapter, you really are a great writer.

And another intense chapter: meet the parents - and lo and behold Cole's dad is just as clever as expected. But they sure did handle it just right, even without lying. The bi thing was unexpected, but on the other hand makes the whole thing a lot more plausible. Maybe also explains why Glen is his best friend, they have something unusual in common. And another fun football moment, he, he. Revenge is so sweet.

Almost my favorite chapter, I just loved the way they wiped the (greasy) floor with that scum bag. And it great that Dale does not cling to an unneccessary sense of pride, but acts sensibly and accepts the job offer. Oh and the teasing with the place of the first kiss was just hilarious, well done.

I just love this whole football team incident - and suddenly we have an old friend introduced, very interesting the way we learn about him - and also the fact that he acted independently of Cole in relation to the possibility of Dale being on the team. I think this is one of the really great thing about this story, that's it's Dale whole attitude and life that changes for the better with his decision to help Cole and be his (boy)friend.

And so it starts - and poor Dale is thrown right into the difficulty of the difference in money and social status. But at least he managed to have fun and look at the advantages of this game.

I liked that Dale did not just give in to Cole, that he was able to tease him and stand up to him. Sets them on a more equal footing, which is certainly necesssary if they are going to pull this off. And even more so if it does end up as more than a fake relationship. That would never be belivable if Cole had the upper hand right from the start.

Brilliant initial chapter, where we get to know the two main characters and something of their background - though some of the important stuff about Dale's parents is only hinted at. And then of course the final boyfriend part which really boosts our interest in what is going on. I'm on my fourth read, but I still enjoy this story a lot. This time I'll do my best to comment, instead of just getting caught up in the story :-)

I've read quite a few of your short stories, and I enjoy them, even if I also would like to know more, especially in this case. But I accept this is your way of doing things, even if it's frustrating having to wonder what will happen next. It's like having a small bite of a wonderful cake and then left craving for more.

Hope his dream comes true, sounds like he needed it.

I liked the story (this is my second read), but it ended rather abruptly, which was a bit disappointing. Did you get bored with it ? I think you should rewrite chapter 6 and let the story expad to a few more chapters, because we'd like to know more about all four.

Somehow those two guys just grow on you, in spite of their foul language, their messed up lives, and their inability to face up to their feelings. The first three chapters were too depressing in spite of the inherent funny parts, so I never got round to commenting, but this one had me smiling in the end. So I felt like tellling you that you've done well in writing something completely diffent and very consistent and credible in the way they interact. Glad they found each other again when they were mature enough to admit their love and need.

Very compelling story - I had to read all the chapters in one setting. This last chapter was by far the worst, I feel so sorry for both Andy and Matt that they made the huge mistake of having sex right at that moment. That knot will screw up their lives even more than what Dillon did. Yes that was bad and inexcusable even if Dillon was himself a victim, but they could have sorted that mess out via extensive counselling with a good therapist, including being angry and hating Dillon for what he did, before going on to forgiving him as a way to forgiving themselves and each other - Andy especially would need to be taken through all the steps and to lay off sex for a long time, until he was better. But now that they've crossed that line, I worry that Andy will drag Matt into the quicksand and the possibility of a happy future together will be much less likely. I almost do not dare to continue with book 2 for fear of what will happen. In any case you are a wonderful writer, and I like that you had sensible girls in the story. Too many of these high school gay romances only use stereotyped girls (either sad or heartbroken wannabe girlfriends or bitches or fag hags), and that gets a bit tiresome.

So please tell us what kind of revenge Kyle does this time. Hope it's something really clever and cruel.

Sorry, but I really hate this chapter with the public confrontation and the whole awful scene in the church. It's just to embarrassing and emotional for my tastes. But I'm glad it ended well, and I'd like to see how they got on in college.

I agree, Lisa, and I wish there were more chapters too. This chapter was both surprising and very predictable, but it sure did clear up a lot of questions. I liked the Sheriff doing the right thing in spite of what he may feel about gays, maybe he's not so bad for the town after all.

It's so great the way that Danny, while being younger, is so mature and forces Ed to thinh things over. And he is being very sensible about having to compromise - both of them, not just him giving up his dream. Compromise and looking out for the happiness of each other is a big part of a relationship - though good sex is just as important :-)

Wow they went all the way on the first night - and without being prepared for it too. That was not what I expected - though I suppose Ed was not a virgin with male sex before. But I still thought it would only be oral for their first time. I do wish you had let us in on more details about their time together, I know you are able to write sex well, and I always feel cheated when you omit this part.

Yeah Danny-boy has got Eddie's number all right. I admire you for choosing a bully as your main character and showing us the kind of pain and denial that is often behind such behaviour. Most stories here only show bullies from the victims' point of view (which works very well too, but few of them get into why or lets the bully change). And I bet Daniel will make Ed change one way or another. Only question is how much...