ok i have to reply cause i thought drewbies reply was harsh and it must have been hard to put yourself out there like you have and admitt that yes people do go on attraction and what they find good looking to them, my definition of good looking probably differs greatly from yours and drewbies but for me i always need there to be an attaction be that to their personality or their looks there has to be an attraction so i don't think you sounded shallow admitting that.
I also don't think your being overly picky there is little point continuing something if you already know you cannot feel that way for them but maybe you need to be careful your not pushing them away before you give them a chance. I guess it also depends on what your looking for if your after fun and nothing serious then that is fine and you wont ever see or pick guys that could become more because it will be set in your mind that you don't want more from them but if you are after a relationship then maybe you need to take time getting to know this phil and don't rush into dating him or defining what you are to eachother, that will let you get to know eachother before so you will have a good idea if he is someone you want to date and if not you have a good friend. Obviously that all depends on how he feels and if you make it clear to him what you want.
Anyway Kevin i am rambling lol but the way i see it your doing the best you can, yes maybe you need to be more direct with the guys to save them getting hurt but that is not always easy, but like i said i think you need to decide what you want from teh guys you date because its ok to just want to date and not settle down but if that is what youw ant then you should expect to lose interest in guys you date quickly because you probably block yourself from feeling anything more or getting to know them better and ignoring the little things that annoy us about people you will only be able to ignore those things if you really want more from a guy your dating.
lol still rambling so will just shut up and wish you the best
Mark