JamesSavik

< Brains! _______________________________________ Disclaimer: I am kidding. I am not serious. If you are dumb ass enough to believe that swine flu vaccine will turn you into a brain eating zombie, in zombies, or that I might actually be serious or have an agenda outside of a having a few laughs, then you had better check your pulse and you are in no danger since zombies do in fact eat brains.

I was kidding- hoping that some dumb ass would try it. You would be amazed at the things people will do to put a little extra kick in an orgasm. Hearing that there's actually a machine and people are doing it... is frankly kinda scary.

I had my flu shot. Now I have no pulse and a craving for yummy brains.

If you hit yourself with a taser while you are having a orgasm, it's supposed to be massive. _______________________________________________ Tasers can cause cardiac arrest, fire and loss of bowel control. Disclaimer by Dewey, Cheatem & Howe

Anybody watch the Prisioner? Meh... another Lost-a-like. Nothing special so far.

I'm sure that you'll do fine. You clearly care about it and that makes all the difference.

I've known a lot of gay guys and I've heard a lot of bullshit about monogamy- usually a few minutes before mr. morals tries to get in my pants. I don't know WTF we think we're trying to prove by creating this fiction. Gay guys f**k. Woo hoo and thank god for it. I'd shoot myself if I had a fat assed old hag that I was supposed to be monogamous with. I don't want to be the guy that sits at home on his hands and gets HIV from his lover that been out getting ass-ploughed on the side. I've never met any "monogamous gay men" that weren't full of shit. I'm pretty sure that it is an urban legend.

My Mom and I are trading cats. She gets Boo, I get the brat. Problem solved but now I've got a cat that hates me.

Rambo was a kitten that my Mom adopted after a stray had a litter in her garage. He's a gray tabby and he got his name from his generally rambunctious nature. Rambo was an active kitten born this past April. He alternates from sweet angle to hideous demonic cat-beast almost instantly. Rambo is a biter and he likes to play rough. You had better pay attention to him or he'll eat you up. Sometimes he attacks your ankles. As a kitten on a vet visit he scratched a vet on the nose. I call him a vampire cat because he appears to like the taste of blood. Tonight he made my Mom fall (she's 82). She is OK but Rambo is about to be homeless. I'm afraid that this cat has to go. Is there such a thing as a hyper-active cat? Is there something like kitty Ritalin? He's not a mean cat but he plays all the time and he plays rough. Too rough to be around an 80 year old lady. I've gotten to where I can't stand the site of the little b****** and my Mom had to talk me out of taking the fuzzy little creep on a one way ride into the country. For some reason my Mom likes the cat and doesn't want to part with it but it bites and scratches her and I'm afraid that he'll make her fall and break a hip. Please: what can I do with this cat besides ring it's spoiled neck? ___________________ PS- I used to like cats but after a dose of this devil I never want to have one again.

Yup. We need an "after-glow" smiley that's having a post-game smoke.

Are they like... all trannies?

Dare I say it? If you knew me, you wouldn't ask. Of course I dare. People LIE. Everybody likes hook-ups. Quick, stress relieving sex with no strings is wonderful. It's like fast food. You can get it most anywhere and none of it is really good for you. Don't like hook-ups? LIAR, LIAR PANTS ON FIRE! Everybody likes hook-ups. They just don't like the hook-ups that they get.

If you were meant for one, then why are there so many flavors of ice cream?

Yesterday I had a Puerto Rican hottie in a sauna and a shrimp po-boy later... two meals fit for a king. :king:

Two gifts for guys that are always well received: money and porn. How well received depends on the audience of course. Grand-maw is in the room: O__o Just guys: See the difference?

I joined a gym about a month ago. My last gym went bankrupt and left me hanging with four months of dues. I know the owner and like the equipment so I have a lot more confidence. I haven't worked out regularly for a while so I decided to start with a lot of aerobic stuff. I didn't touch a weight for a couple of weeks. Every morning I first started I spent 45 minutes to an hour on a stationary bike. Once I got my stamina back, I cut the time on the bike down and have started in on the weights. The gym has Nautilus and Hammer-strength equipment and I can focus on a specific area and work out strong every day. I'm pleased with my progress. The lats are showing up and the abs are moving towards acceptable and away from abominable. People work out in shifts and its easy to tell the contenders from the pretenders. One of the people that works out on the same schedule as I do is a cute Puerto-Rican guy who looks 20 but is really thirty. We spot for each other and talk- he likes to have someone to talk to because it helps him with his English. I like talking to him because he's hotter than white phosphorus. When he came back from his last deployment, he came here to work with a friend in construction and I must say: he is well built. I'm tired tonight. Tomorrow after a HARD workout, it's off to the sauna.

You Stink. -AK in Phoenix, AZ Oh... You mean a review of YOUR work. My bad. Don't be hard on AK. I nuked his home town.

What is that?

My favorite is... it depends on the day I guess. Some days its a suicide dog: a hot dog with hot mustard, sauerkraut and chili. Other days it's a philly beef & cheese with onions... hot mustard Then some days its Cajun roast beef on French bread with swiss-cheese, mayo and hot mustard.

Here's Me: You can make your own at South Park Studios (you have to have Flash installed). Turn on Paint and leave it in the background. Hit PrintScr and paste your picture into Paint. You'll have to crop it but you can then save and post the image. Show us what you would look like as a South Park character!

Burning books is just such a nauseating concept to me. I have read books that were bad, badly written and expressed bad ideas. I would never seek to burn them and often if you read your adversaries books, you'll understand him better. I have read the Turner Dairies and the Communist Manifesto. I have read Mien Kamp and the Egyptian Book of the Dead. They have not turned me into a racist, communist, Nazi or a mummy. Go figure.

I had a smoke after reading that. Was it good for you?

I want to see this address on the senate floor so the Marklars trying to stuff their Marklar down our Marklar will get a f-ing Marklar. It was just so eloquent that it spoke to me. I had heard it before but it really moved me.

RECALL NOTICE Due to the ballistic properties of the Sports Butt Plug 9000, it has been recalled from the market. If you have or use the Sports Butt Plug 9000, cease and desist using it immediately and return it for a full refund. It has been known to be expelled at high velocity with the destructive fore of a 105mm howitzer. --- Dewey, Cheatem & Howe, Attorneys