Delicious - 10. Wrong Footed

Wrong Footed – A Faris and James Story

Faris rolled off and put his arms around me. He drew me close, and I reveled in his warm sweating body, the evidence of our lovemaking. I turned over and faced him, kissing him quickly, and running my hands over his lean hard frame.

"James, you've had me twice now." Faris grinned at me. "Greedy thing."

"What? No … well unless you want more." I chuckled and kissed him again.

He yanked me closer. "Later. Let's just have a wee nap."

"I was thinking—"

"Dangerous pastime for you, James."

I slapped his naked backside. "Cheeky." I laughed at my own joke. "Seriously, look outside, Faris. Let's go and do something this afternoon."

Faris glanced out our bedroom window. "You mean out there? It's snowing."

"Yes, in the snow. Let's go for walk … No! Let's go skating."

"Och ... James. I've not been skatin' since I was a wee nipper."

"It's like riding a bicycle."

Faris laughed. "James, then we shouldn't go skating. I seem to remember being run over by a certain Canadian pharmacy student on a bicycle, dressed in a smurf-blue cyclin' suit."

I glared at him as furiously as I could, which made him laugh harder. "Will you ever forget that, Faris?"

"Oh, good lord no, James. I dinna think I can." He smiled and gazed into my eyes. "I love you James, but you've tired me out and I'm napping."

"That's a good idea." I snuggled into his shoulder.

I woke up and made us coffee, bringing it back to bed. Faris, now awake, reached for his cup. I handed him the thick Sunday paper which he still liked to have delivered.

"Thanks, James." He took a sip. "Ah, perfect Sunday morning. Thanks, babe."

I smiled at him as I climbed back into bed. "I love our Sunday mornings." I placed my coffee on the bedside table and turned to him. "Please Faris, let's go out. It's a beautiful day."

He'd just leaned in to kiss me when our two dogs Larry and Francis bounded in. Larry is a chocolate lab, and Francis is one of his pups by way of a white standard poodle. They both leapt onto the bed, both dripping-wet from being out in the snow and running back in through the doggy door.

Faris and I fought off their huge bodies and tricky doggy tongues. The paper was trampled on, Faris was wearing his coffee, the blankets and sheets were a mess by the time we'd gotten them to settle down and back onto the floor.

"Out dogs!" Faris roared at them, and they both galloped down the hall. He turned to look at me. "Well, that's got the day off to a … challenging start!" He wiped his chest with a corner of the damp sheet. "Since I'm up, let's strip the bed, shower, and eat. Then we can go and bloody skate!"

"Really?"

"Yes, really. Come on, up with you."

I peered at my coffee, wanting a sip, but floating doggy hair quickly changed my mind.

Faris seemed a bit grumpy, but together we stripped the bed and then showered. Okay, it was a bit of a long and fun shower, so it was near lunch-time when we were finally dressed and ready to leave.

Faris zipped his jacket and picked up the van keys from the table in our front hall. "Since I am treating you, my wee smurf, I am getting one of those excellent sausages from the food trucks today."

"Oh, that's a great idea for after skating." I grabbed my wallet from the table as well.

"You get two after skating."

"Two?"

"Yeah, a sausage from the truck …" Faris grabbed me and pulled me close. "… And this one."

"Mmmm, that sounds just about perfect."

Faris smirked, patted my behind, released me and moved to open the door. "Come on then."

We drove to the outdoor public rink in the centre of town. It wasn't too busy, though it was mid-afternoon. Faris found a place to park and we walked along the street past the two or three food trucks that were always sitting there. The smell of fresh-cut fries made my mouth water.

I grabbed Faris' arm and tugged him to a stop. "Don't they smell wonderful?"

"Aye, they do. Reminds me of home … Mum's always had that lovely greasy odor." He grinned at me.

"We'll get some to share after."

"Mmm, sausage and chips, times two. Done!" Faris put his arms around me. "You know … we could just say we've been skating. We could just put a foot on the rink and say we've been."

I frowned. What was he saying?

Faris was laughing. "Och, James you are so single minded."

"Me? I'm not the one who—"

"Who what?"

"Who wants to fake skating, buy food and go back home, to … I mean … have more—"

Faris was nearly doubled over in laughter. "You cannae even say it. Come on. Let's get you on the ice."

We walked away from the trucks, toward the rental shed. Faris held my hand.

"How long have we been married now, James?"

"Three years … why?"

"How often do we…" He bent close to me, his voice quiet. "Fool around?"

"Often."

"We spend a lot of time doing that sex stuff, right James?"

Faris was always doing this, getting me off kilter, onto my back foot. I was wary but answered him. "Right Faris, we do."

"And you love me, right."

We were near the rink when I stopped. "Yes, Faris. I love you."

He grinned and walked to the rental office. I scuttled along behind to catch up.

The space wasn't big, but the shelves along its three walls were filled with skates; white figure skates and black hockey skates. It had a pleasant odour of feet and leather.

The woman behind the counter smiled. "Hello. Are you renting?"

"Please." Faris leaned on the wooden surface. "My husband here would like a nine, and I’m a twelve."

"No problem." She walked along, picking from her stock. "Are you here on vacation?"

"Och, no. I am, what do you call it? A permanent resident. I only married him to stay in the country."

I looked at him, in shock. "What?"

He was grinning like the Cheshire Cat. The woman behind the counter was laughing.

I glared at him. "Oh, for Pete's sake!"

Faris paid for the skates. "Thanks. I have to say that, well, I really came here just to marry him. James is the love of my life."

He walked away carrying both pairs of skates.

The woman turned to me smiling. "Is he always like that?"

"Always"

"Lucky you." She rang up the sale. "Have a great day!"

"Thanks." I turned around and followed Faris to a bench he'd sat down on.

I sat beside him, pulled off my boot, shoved my left foot into the skate and began lacing it. He grinned as he did the same, nearly finishing his second.

Faris stood up, getting a feel for the skates, stepped onto the indoor-outdoor carpet that edged the rink, and then moved onto the ice. I watched in awe as he skated perfectly, huge and taller now in the skates. He skated around the rink, and stopped in front of me.

"You're right, James. It is like riding a bike."

"That was great, Faris!" I got to my feet and stepped on the carpet. "I love you … it turned out nice today. I thought things had sort of gotten off on the wrong foot this morning, with the dogs and stuff."

I stepped onto the ice, and pushed off with my right foot.

Suddenly, I wasn't gliding.

I fell with zero grace, landing on my right hip, my shoulder bouncing afterward. I was okay, just a bit red in the face.

Faris pointed at my left skate. I'd forgotten to tuck in the extra-long laces and had tried to skate over one of them. "The day didn't, but you certainly got off on the wrong foot."

Chuckling, he picked me up, knelt down on one knee and tucked in my stray laces. He stared up at me. "Will you skate with me, James?"

"Is that a proposal?"

"Aye."

"Then yes, I'd love to skate with you, Faris."

He stood up and took my hand. "Let's go. Start on the right foot this time, James."

With my hand safely in his, I did.

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