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    AC Benus
  • AC Benus
  • Author
  • 07/31/2019
  • 252 Words
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  • 21 Comments
Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

The Thousandth Regiment - 1. "Once we were factory workers or farmers"

.

"The Thousandth Regiment"

a translation of

Hans Ehrenbaum-Degele's

War Poems,

DAS TAUSENDSTE REGIMENT

by

AC Benus

~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

1. Wir waren in Fabriken oder Bauern

Mit freiem Horizont und wenig Leid.

Nun halten Zellen von Kasernenmauern

Uns schmerzlich fest für eine lange Zeit.

 

 

Wir wissen ferne Mädchen um uns trauern,

Die, wie wir singen, bald ein Fremder freit.

Doch überkam uns solche Müdigkeit,

Daß uns Gefühle nicht mehr überschauern.

 

 

Wenn abends Mond die harten Höfe weißt,

Und rings die Runde durch die Zimmer schritt,

Sind wir auf den Matratzen so erstarrt,

 

 

Daß kein Geräusch der Nacht, die draußen harrt,

Uns der Gewalt des schweren Schlafs entreißt,

Die über uns in dunkler Schwermut glitt.

 

 

                         ---

 

1. Once we were factory workers or farmers

With blue skyline-views and but little grief.

Now barrack walls pen us in, as if in cells,

Holding us in place for the longest time.

 

We know some distant girls are grieving for us,

Who, while we chant drills, will wed a stranger.

But such exhaustion has overtaken us,

Those sentiments no longer come to haunt.

 

When the evening moon stalks the heartless yard,

And walks a sentry through each of the rooms,

It finds us ossified on mattresses,

 

Knowing that no sound in the night awaits

To rip from the violence of a sleep

Pulled over us by dark melancholy.

 

 

                         ---

 

 

_

 

 

 

 

Copyright © 2019 AC Benus; All Rights Reserved.
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Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 
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Parker Owens
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This is vivid poetry of the Great War, yet it speaks to many different generations. I’m struck by the images of the moon stalking through the barracks, the still forms of men, exhausted. And the poet describes the unhappy  knowledge that their sweethearts and homes may be irrevocably changed when - or if - they return home. Thank you for posting this. 

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AC Benus
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5 hours ago, Mikiesboy said:

This is heavy ... the sadness hidden in exhaustion. The pictures he paints are amazing ... ossified on a mattress ... the violence of sleep.. frightening scenes. 

This is a wonderful piece and i wait for the next.  Thanks AC.

Thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts, Tim. Yes, there are some remarkable pictures in this and all of his poems. The tie-in to emotions is very strong too. 

Thanks again for reading these 

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Lyssa
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Dear @AC Benus, finally I have time to comment. This translation is magnificent. Yes, every emotion Hans Ehrenbaum-Degele transported is reflected perfectly. Your English version makes the reader feel the intentions, the deep exhaustion, despair, grief of the original. This poem is overwhelming.

But more than that, knowing the poem, having studied its stanzas and grammar and word creations for a while, I see how precisely you translated without making it read like a translation. This poem is very difficult from its sentence structure and a lot of words, like for example "überschauern", which has no real fitting English word to translate too. Ehrenbaum-Degele used Metaphors, which are understandable for Germans, but do not translate into English metaphors and you accomplished the miracle to find metaphors, which are fitting and bring forward the exact emotion Ehrenbaum-Degele aimed for. That is excellent and absolute fantastic.

Thank you for your hard work. 🙂

Lyssa

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AC Benus
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17 hours ago, MichaelS36 said:

What a poem. It all seems so hard. I wonder if British or American soldiers at the time felt the same way. It's wonderful, AC, but difficult to imagine how they felt. 

That is such a great question, Mike. I'm not versed well enough to know if poems showing the hellish pointlessness of war were allowed to be printed in America, Canada and Britain during the First World War. Censorship was rife. And even later, it seems a bit unlikely. Perhaps the best example is thinking how a book like All Quiet on the Western Front could not have been told or printed from an Alied side POV even in the 1920s.

By the end of WW2, things had changed in America, and books reflecting the hell of war began to appear and be popular. That continues to today. 

As for Hans Ehrenbaum-Degele, one of his early Regiment poems makes it clear what he felt about this elective war he was drawn into, calling the cheering folks back home the "tumbling deluded." 

Thanks for reading and commenting :) 

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AC Benus
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16 hours ago, Parker Owens said:

This is vivid poetry of the Great War, yet it speaks to many different generations. I’m struck by the images of the moon stalking through the barracks, the still forms of men, exhausted. And the poet describes the unhappy  knowledge that their sweethearts and homes may be irrevocably changed when - or if - they return home. Thank you for posting this. 

Yes, Parker, thank you. I agree that there are so many strong images and emotional stepping stones in these fourteen lines. I have always been struck by the "wed a stranger" image too. It could mean the men expect not to ever make it home, to be jilted, or even to go back but never again be the man she'd known. Great poetry leaves all these doors open; it depends on the reader and even what sort of mood they are in. Different readings of the same poem at differing times can offer shifting insight. 

Thank you for reading and commenting :)

 

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AC Benus
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3 hours ago, Brayon said:

I can only say "wow". This poem floored me, and you can see the heartache and tiredness that he wrote about. Thanks for translating it, AC. Your skills amaze me.

Thank you, A! I mentioned to @Mikiesboyhow sifting through these poems is like panning for gold, only my pan comes up full of it every time. These are important and devastating poems; I feel honored to work on this project. 

Thank you too for reading and commenting :)

 

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AC Benus
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2 hours ago, Lyssa said:

Dear @AC Benus, finally I have time to comment. This translation is magnificent. Yes, every emotion Hans Ehrenbaum-Degele transported is reflected perfectly. Your English version makes the reader feel the intentions, the deep exhaustion, despair, grief of the original. This poem is overwhelming.

But more than that, knowing the poem, having studied its stanzas and grammar and word creations for a while, I see how precisely you translated without making it read like a translation. This poem is very difficult from its sentence structure and a lot of words, like for example "überschauern", which has no real fitting English word to translate too. Ehrenbaum-Degele used Metaphors, which are understandable for Germans, but do not translate into English metaphors and you accomplished the miracle to find metaphors, which are fitting and bring forward the exact emotion Ehrenbaum-Degele aimed for. That is excellent and absolute fantastic.

Thank you for your hard work. 🙂

Lyssa

Your praise of the translations and support -- both technical and emotional -- means a great deal to me, Lyssa. I try to let the words of the original speak to me, and then think how I'd describe them to a friend. I think for most of my translation work, that's how I approach it. It's great to hear things are not getting lost in the language shift; thank you. 

I look forward to bringing these poems forward, although I know it will be an emotional task. Thanks again 

 

Edited by AC Benus
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JeffreyL

I applaud your first translation! You have chosen quite an undertaking! I was never a soldier, but the feelings strike me as being universal for anyone who has served their country during war. The words and images are very thought provoking. I am curious about a few things. Where did your friend first come across these poems? Are you a native German speaking person, or did you learn at school? What prompted you to translate these poems into English? Than you for your effort. I will be following closely. 

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AC Benus
23 hours ago, Defiance19 said:

Wow, AC.. I am struck by the imagery here and can’t say much beyond what those before me have said. Those poor young men plucked off to war, perhaps enamored by it, until the harsh reality and the costs to them, hits home. 

Thanks for reading and commenting, Def! Your thoughts here make me consider something I hadn't thought about before, but for male couples this separation was doubly stressful, as it's likely both partners will be fighting. It turned out this way for Hans and his partner Wilhelm Murnau, the film director, who was trained to be a pilot in the war. My heart breaks to consider how Wilhelm must have received the news of Hans' death, so far away, and not even knowing if he could get leave to attend the funeral. In the end, it was Else Lasker-Schüler who made the arrangements and delivered the eulogy, and Wilhelm was able to attend.

   

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AC Benus
18 hours ago, JeffreyL said:

I applaud your first translation! You have chosen quite an undertaking! I was never a soldier, but the feelings strike me as being universal for anyone who has served their country during war. The words and images are very thought provoking. I am curious about a few things. Where did your friend first come across these poems? Are you a native German speaking person, or did you learn at school? What prompted you to translate these poems into English? Than you for your effort. I will be following closely. 

Thank you, Jeff, for your kind and warm comments. I first began to try my hand at translations many years ago, with lyrics for music. I hadn't done more than a couple of pieces from German until a couple of years ago. That's when @Lyssa began to ask me "Have you ever read this; have you ever read that?" Her introduction to me of German Expressionist poetry was a real eye-opener. It's through interested in the well-read and well-published Else Lasker-Schüler that we first began to see mention of a Gay couple she was very close to, the poet Hans Ehrenbaum-Degele and Wilhelm Murnau; the two who met in college and remained together until death did them part. Else accomplished something incredibly touching after Hans' death: she lent her poetic voice to Wilhelm and published a series of seven poems (the "Tristan" poems, her nickname for Hans) for Wilhelm to express how much he loved his partner. It's through this reference that both Lyssa and myself began to dig into Ehrenbaum-Degele's poetry.

I was really surprised to read his work. It's powerful stuff. 

As for speaking German (or the other languages I lend my hand to), I don't claim any ability. I have a couple of online sources, and Lyssa is always ready to lend thoughts on particularly tough turns of expression. I try my best, and take comfort in knowing I can speak the language of poetry. If I were less proficient in that tongue, all of this might be a fool's errand. 

Thanks again for your support and comments   

     

Edited by AC Benus
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AC Benus
1 hour ago, mollyhousemouse said:

amazing, simply amazing
that you can take the words of a poet in a language you don't speak  and make them sing like this, so that they touch people reading them 100 years and more after they were written is amazing, magical even
i can't wait to read them all (i have some catching up to do)

I'm glad you discovered these, Molly. Thank you for your praise, and go your own pace with these poems. They are mostly strong medicine, but rewarding  

Edited by AC Benus
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AC Benus
1 hour ago, Backwoods Boy said:

Having come late to the party, I could read many in one sitting, but I suspect I won't do that.  My congratulations to you on undertaking this project.  It has to be daunting, both linguistically and emotionally.

Thank you for reading, Backwoods Boy. No one is ever late to read something new to them :) I hope you read the series and get to know the poet, but it won't be a fun ride. Thank you again 

 

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