Brandon Smiling: From the Billy Chase Chronicles (1) - 55. Entry 55

Weekly Roundup

Well, the Bobby and Billy Saga continued this week.

Monday Bobby found me in the Library as per usual. I kid you not, he was blushing when he came up to sit at my table. He had the goofiest grin on his face when he sat down and plopped his book back down. I smiled back at him, though I think it was in reaction to his weird and sudden shyness toward me.

He gave me a strange little 'Hey’ that I answered in kind, though trying not to sound quite as nervous as Bobby seemed to be.

“What’s up with you today? You look like you are holding on to some big secret or whatever.” I had to ask. That was what this looked like to me, anyway. Like he had some kind of deep dark secret he was just dying to spill the beans about.

“Hehehe! How could you tell?” Bobby giggled. I just shook my head at him because he was acting particularly dorky.

“Oh, I dunno. You have a goofy grin and that look like a six year old gets when he’s hiding a cookie behind his back that he stole from Grandma’s cookie jar. So?” I figured there’d be no peace if Bobby couldn’t tell me his little ‘secret’.

“Heheheh . . . Um . . .” He started to look at the table and then all around him like he was being stalked by Government spies.

“I don’t think the CIA would care what you know, Bobby.” I teased.

“Oh, hush! Ok, well . . . I like, kinda, saw Jamie Cross naked on Friday!” Bobby said this like it was actual news. I was a bit interested though . . . but maybe not for the reasons Bobby was thinking I’d be interested. I think he was ‘pinging’ me as Chandler calls it when one guy puts the Gaydar on another guy.

“Ok . . . and?” I didn’t want to give Bobby the satisfaction of a full read on my ‘Gayness’. I am sure, now, that he’s Gay as a pride parade. I did have an opportunity on Sunday night to talk with Chandler on the phone about Bobby’s strange behavior and he confirmed something for me. Bobby definitely sounds like he is Gay and is ‘pinging’ me. I asked Chan about what ‘pinging’ meant and that’s when he told me what it was. He said that it was a way a Gay guy has of sizing up someone he’s interested in, but not sure how into a Gay relationship the other guy might be. He boiled it down to just what I said before, Bobby was casting his Gaydar on me to get a ‘reading’.

I asked about Billy’s equally strange behavior and Chandler said he wasn’t sure what that was about and only time would tell. Time would tell? I don’t want to wait for time to tell! I want to tell Billy it’s time to come out of the closet too! Like, right now!

Anyways . . .

“And . . .?” Bobby asked that like what did I mean by ‘and’. Like, why didn’t I think that seeing Jamie naked was the most amazing thing ever!

“It’s Jaime Cross! You know! The prince of the school! I had to take gym at the end of the day because I’d missed my end of term physical fitness thingie for my grade and Coach said I could make it up at the end of the day! I didn’t know that was the period the fricking football team has and there he was! Jamie Cross - NAKED right in front of me! He even . . . waved at me!” Bobby really did look excited by this and was not ashamed to say so! I have to snicker to myself about Jamie standing there with everything ‘hanging loose’ and waving at a stupefied Bobby! Hahaha! What a picture that would have made!

In all truth, despite having actually had Jamie in my house half-naked and, virtually, all to myself if I’d wanted it - the idea of seeing him completely nude was a bit intriguing. But, I didn’t want to show even that much interest to Bobby.

“Oh, yeah . . . I used to see that quite a bit. I had gym with him earlier in the semester. He’s pretty strong. I can see why they made him quarterback.” I said this in the blandest way possible so as to get Bobby off my scent.

“You saw that every day?” That honestly did astonish poor Bobby, however, and I felt a little bad about lying like I did, but that’s what this Gay thing does to a person. It can turn a Closet Case into the best chameleon on earth - changing one’s color and shape to hide better through deception. That’s pretty sad, really.

“Yeah, him and his creepy crew of jocks - I had to transfer. Those guys are assholes! They messed with Jimmy LaPlane a lot and with the rest of us Freshmen. Jamie’s always been cool, though. I think we’re, kind of like, friends now or something. I go to Church with him and his family, so . . .” The Church thing certainly put a clinker into Bobby’s pinging. Hehehe!

“You go to where with Jamie Cross?” Bobby’s eyes actually nearly bugged out at that one. I don’t know why the idea of that would have been so shocking.

“Church! His family and mine have, sort of, known each other for a while now. Honestly, it’s difficult sitting across from him and watching him fidget while the Monsignor does his Homily after seeing him completely in the buff. It’s weird how seeing someone naked can change your view on a person, you know?” I did leave Bobby with that bit of a clue, but only to confuse him a little more.

“Wow! I never knew you were so close with the Crosses like that! That sort of makes you the Duke of High School then! I’m friends with a popular guy for a change!” I figured Bobby was just trying to be flattering with that nonsense.

“Yeah, Bobby. Hehehe! Sure, I’m really ‘Mr. Popular’ over here sitting in this Library all the time!” I think I rolled my eyes at him. I’m almost sure I did.

“It’s the aloof ones that are always the most . . . mysterious!” Bobby wiggled his eyebrows at me like some ham actor and I just had to giggle.

He definitely has me confused with six other guys if he things I’m ‘Mr. Popular’. Flattery always has a reason behind it and I’m waiting for the ‘other shoe to drop’ as my Dad likes to say. What does Bobby really want?

After Bobby left I had a special visit from Billy! Thankfully, I didn’t have much in the way of classes so I was lucky enough to hang out around school a bit more freely - if that isn’t the strangest thing a teenager has ever said, I don’t know what is! In doing that, I got the chance to meet up with Billy who had been looking for me earlier.

For the first time ever, Billy asked me if I wanted to do something over the weekend! I can’t tell you how excited that made me! I naturally agreed, but had no idea what he had in mind. He was so happy that I went for the idea! I swear it gave me goospimples for the whole rest of the day!

Tuesday morning, however, Bobby also invited me out. He thought we’d catch a movie together on Friday.

Yeah, I thought that too. Is he actually asking me out on a date? It sounded more like a friendly invitation for some fun on the weekend, but when I asked him if any of his other friends might want to join us he, sort of, shrugged and said something quite sad, “I don’t have any other friends like that who would want to go.”

Awww! Maybe, I have Bobby all wrong! Maybe he really does just want to be friends! Well, I was certainly up for that so, “No problem. You do now! Do you know what one you want to see?”

I hoped it wasn’t an R-rated one, because I don’t think Bobby would have the same sex appeal as Marie in getting us tickets. But then again, there was that old but cute 19-year-old ticket guy that winked at me on that movie date with Marie. He just might think Bobby is just his type! Hehehe!

“I look some up and email them to you so you can choose!” Bobby said with a silly grin.

“Well, ok. But, just so long as it’s something we both can enjoy. I know my taste in movies can get pretty weird sometimes,” I warned.

“That’s cool. I have a feeling your kind of weird is just like my kind of weird . . . so basically it wouldn’t be weird at all between us!” Bobby said this and I had to wonder what the hell that meant! If that was a confession of Gay love than I can see why some folks call Gays ‘Queers’. That was a very queer way of putting things.

This, of course, made for a timing conflict with Billy since I wasn’t sure what part of the weekend he wanted to go out with me. I was a bit scared to mention Bobby on Friday seeing how strange Billy’s reactions have been toward him lately.

But, then I got an idea to possibly settle this Bobby/Billy thing and, maybe, flush some truth out of the situation about how either of them felt about me.

Billy showed up at the Library in the afternoon and plopped his gorgeous self right across from me at the table. I swear he stared at me for a whole half a second sighing before he started to talk with me. I felt like doing just the same thing for a second. Just sitting there . . . staring into his eyes and . . . sighing.

Anyway . . .

I figured I’d need to start the ball rolling with my plan, so I told Billy, “Um, after we talked about plans for the weekend, Bobby asked me if I wanted to go with him to the movies on Friday. Were you thinking about Friday to be our night out?” I asked, gaging Billy’s response.

After some uncomfortable fidgeting and looking down at the table, Billy answered, “Not necessarily. We can do Saturday or Sunday too. Whenever!” I could tell he was a bit disappointed that I’d taken Bobby’s offer up, but this, sort of, jealous reaction from Billy was just what I was looking for. He really is jealous of me and Bobby! Wow!

Then, ah-hem, Billy dropped a BIIIG hint and basically out of nowhere asked, “You know, he asked me if you had a girlfriend. Or if you talked about girls at all. Hehehe....weird, right?”

Where on earth did THAT come from? I was literally shocked that Bobby would have been that bold! I was certain then that what Bobby was after was a real live boydate with me at a movie that I’d suspect would have been a little raunchy around the edges. A trick I’d had done already . . . by Marie! We all remember how that little outing went!

All this came out from me with, “Hehehe! Really? Did he? Wow...”

Oooo! If looks could kill Bobby’d have been a dead man! Billy had a look on him that could sour ice cold milk! The plan was working better and better! I am in the middle of a tug-of-war between two guys that obviously want my company and all to themselves too!

Seeing this I, naturally, had to twist the knife a bit, “Bobby's cool. I think he wants to hang out more and stuff. He keeps asking, so I guess I should go.”

There was uncomfortable squirming and a hint of a flush on those precious apple cheeks of Billy’s. Sparing him any more of this obvious ‘agony,' I then asked:

“You wanna go with us?”

I swear to you, Nameless Hacker! The look of joy that flashed across Billy’s face was like the dawn rising after a long winter storm! Oh, it was such a beautiful thing to see! It was all I could do to keep from reaching across that table, grabbing Billy by his t-shirt, and kissing him!

The fact that this simple thing should make Billy so happy tells me the story.

I am in a love triangle! It’s the only way to explain it! Only, unfortunately for Bobby, the object of my affection is Billy’s point on that triangle!

Am I using Bobby badly to suss out Billy to find out, finally, what his true feelings are? Am I kidding myself with wishful thinking and reading this all wrong? Are we just going to end up the three Straight Musketeers? Before Friday, maybe I can pass this by Chandler if he’s available. I need some Gay adult advice with this one.

Wednesday and Thursday I stayed home since there wasn’t much to do at school. I didn’t do much other than review the movies Bobby sent me by email and play some games. I feel that Summer feeling creeping in. Slow days of not much going on. Part of me is half-hoping that I can go back to my Uncle’s again and spend time there with Perskey and some of my other barnyard friends. It’s been a crazy second semester of High School already this year.

I spoke with Chandler a bit tonight and he was interested in how things were happening with the Bobby/Billy thing. He warned me, though, not to get too ‘into’ playing one guy off the other! “That’s a stick of dynamite just waiting to go off, if you aren’t careful,” he told me seriously!

That, kind of, put some ice water down my pants! But, thinking about it, I know he’s right. I’ll lay off the sussing and just leave things to play out. We’re having our little group movie date tomorrow so we can just see what happens and how things go.

This is Brandon, still ‘sussing’ but much more carefully!