Return to Sender - 16. Chapter 16 - Kai

CHAPTER 16 - Kai

It was around 11pm when I turned in for the night - my first night at ‘home’ - and lay awake for a long while, letting the day pass through my mind. I was dead tired - going up and then down those stairs had taken a lot out of me, but I was also happy to be here, with Adam.

I listened as he scuttled about for a while upstairs. Thump thump thump. Bathroom. Thump thump thump. Bedroom. Thump thump thump thump. Closet. Door creaking closed. Thump thump thump. Bathroom again. Toilet flushing, then water trickling. I could hear his electric toothbrush. Then the door closing. Thump thump thump. Bed creaking. I couldn’t help but smile - I’d missed these sounds, the sounds of real life. No more machines beeping, footsteps rushing by, phones ringing and hushed conversations.

I sighed deeply. And then began to chuckle.

That damn brother of mine and his big mouth. But I liked Adam’s little joke with it, making that sheet with the doodle on it of a shack, with the sounds coming out. That was hilarious. And he’d been so incredibly sweet when he felt embarrassed after he misspoke. Or rather, spoke the truth, but then tried to backtrack.

God, he was adorable. And he didn’t seem to know it. I loved that he thought of all those things. Minute details that I, sure as what, would not have thought about - like getting the same beds in all rooms so he’d only have to think about one size of sheets and blankets. Who thinks like that!?! Adam.

And those quirks of his - that drawing, the new/not so new boat by the jetty - who gets an old boat, that’s probably about to sink again, just as he got rid of the old one? Who feeds a dog waffles? Who has little theme figures painted above door handles? They made me want to just grab him and squeeze and kick the door closed so no one would ever change that.

He was wonderful.

And now he was a couple of feet almost directly above me. What I would give to be there and hold him while he slept. Or wake him up and feel him, be with him. I did have a talk with Doc about it. Or rather, he with me.

I had been a little worried because of the phone call I’d had with Megan and he’d been there, overhearing.

**********

He came in during his rounds, glanced at my chart, asked some brusque questions. He didn’t mention the phone call from the previous night, nor Megan.

“Doc,” I’d asked, "do you have a moment?”

“Sure,” he replied, absentmindedly.

“When I called last night, you overheard Megan say…” I stopped when he raised his finger and went to the door and gave it a light kick to close.

“Still a military hospital,” he said, jerking his thumb behind him toward the door. Then he came over, slid a chair over and sat down, leaning on the back. “Gotta be careful. It’s getting better these days, though. And I wanted to speak to you about that.”

“Doc, I…”

He interrupted me. “First - my name is Callum. Since I’m diddlin’ your sister, I think we’re fine with using first names, soldier.”

I smirked at that. “Okay… You first, then!”

He ignored it. “Second - my brother is gay, and he works as a Major in the Coast Guard. So I’m…aware of the difficulties some of you faced, or still face. I don’t agree with the politics, but here we are. It’s the person that serves, not their proclivities. The old geezers need to butt out and get on board. As a people, we’re like that new Volkswagen Beetle - upgraded the design but we still look the same and perform like shit.©”

“Thank you for saying that.” Nicely put.

“Sure. And third - if you’re wanting to nail that penpal of yours, which I can relate to because I spent months in hospitals, you need to make sure your business is functioning properly.”

Doc! Man, I’m not easily embarrassed but he took it to a new level! Yet - he looked at me, eyes clear and serious, as if this was just normal conversation for him. And apparently, Megan had told him about Adam.

“I umm….that’s not an issue. It works.”

Quite well, too. That had been working fine from almost the minute I started using the bathroom on my own, without needing help. And lately, fantasizing about a certain writer had…increased my desires. Very.

A corner of his mouth went up. “As happy as I am to hear a fellow man admit that he can still get a hard on, I meant the business on the other end. You a top or a bottom? Versa?”

Wow. Ehm…yeah, wow, add another level. Dayum.

“I only ask because I told you the other day about keeping an eye on it. I’m not seeing any results in your chart - you constipated?

“No, I went this morning. And last night.”

“Okay, good. You forget to tell the nurse? Tell them, please. So anything going up there - smooth sailin’?”

“No danger of that. I’m a…top.”

“Right. Well, I hope Scribblyboy has his shit in order then. I’ll prescribe some enemas - he can use ‘em.”

I…I…How does one respond to that? Come on!

“Well, then you’re good to go. Might wanna be careful at first, don’t strain yourself too much. Your body will tell you when enough is enough. Try doing it while standing or let him sit on top the first few times. Try other stuff as you go. You got rubbers?”

This sure was a conversation I wouldn’t easily forget. Yikes. Private, Doc!

“Do you?” I asked, a little annoyed but it was a wasted question on him.

“No, I don’t like ‘em.”

Me neither.

“Megan doesn’t either.”

Didn’t need to know that.

“Doc, that’s…oversharing. And you’re talking about my sister…”

“Oh. Well, she’s on the pill.”

Didn’t need to know that either but since he mentioned her...

“Doc, about Megan - what are your intentions?”

“Honorable.” He thought about that and then grinned as if recalling something, staring at nothing. “Okay, not entirely. She’s a little spitfire. Makes me wanna bundle her up and drop her at the first altar, shove a ring on that finger. Then procreate until my dick falls off.” He glanced up, frowning and coming back to the present, when I guffawed. “Shit. Oversharing again, huh?”

“Little bit,” I nodded.

A little bit much! Any other guy and I’d have decked him. I don’t care if you’re higher in rank or not. And Doc was. One above me - a Colonel … in the Marine Corps.

In his case - it’s weird hearing someone talk about your sister like that. But for Megan? I couldn’t wish for a better man. He sounded like he already carried her on both hands and worshiped the ground she walked on.

And it was about damn time she got herself one of those.

**********

So I knew I was in the clear there. That’s not to say I would act on it. Nor was I willing to do that. Adam didn’t deserve that, nor did I. We deserved time. I believed that, I really did. I never had that with anyone else. I wanted time together, to go out and get to know each other.

But I would steal his kisses. Those I would have.

I’m not one to hold back, I never have. If I feel it, I’ll share it, and if it happens, that’s fine, of course. We’re both adults. It’s just not the goal for me. I wanted him to know me and part of that was to tell him what I felt, when we were upstairs. There were no lies. I had thought about being with him, dreamed about it. I had fantasized about him while getting off in the bathroom, sometimes bringing the picture with me, to see those incredible silver eyes as I finished. Each time I felt more drawn to him. And that was just from the written word (and later, hearing his voice on the phone). It was an amazing thing that I never expected to happen in my life. I’d settled on less already, even before the accident. To have this now, that was a bless…

My phone rang, jerking me out of my thoughts. Who was calling me at - I glanced at my watch - just after midnight?

Megan. I picked up.

“Megan? What’s wrong?”

She would never call this late unless something bad had to have happened. Oh god, Nikki…

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry! I know it’s late but I really need to talk to someone or I’m going crazy. I’m freaking the F-out.”

“Is it Nikki?”

“What? Oh! No, no, no. She’s fine.”

I blew out a breath. Sis, don’t do that to me!

“She’s at a study thing with some girls from school. Nik is fine.”

“What is it, then? God, you're scaring the hell out of me...”

“I’m sorry! Promise me you’re not gonna yell at me.”

I frowned. She usually said that when she’d done something really stupid but she hadn’t asked that for a long time.

“Okay…”

“I’m late.”

“Umm…late for what?”

“No … late! Like in that there may be a chance that I might be pregnant. It’s really way too early to tell, but the chance is there…”

“Oh Meg,” I groaned, rubbing my face. “How?”

“Whaddayamean how? You taught me this yourself when I was twelve, remember?” Her voice adapted a version of a younger me. “Well, Megan, when a boy puts his penis in a girl…”

“Don’t get smart with me, Missy.”

“I know, alright? I-I forgot to take my birth control pills. I got a new phone last week and didn’t redo the alarm. I was going through my purse earlier this evening and found the strip…”

“When was the last time you took them?”

She remained quiet for half a minute. “Wednesday before last?” She sounded very small then and I could tell she was panicking. She never spoke that way.

I sighed. “And Callum didn’t use protection…” And I already knew that. Thanks, Doc…

“No, I told him I was on the pill.”

“And that didn’t immediately make you remember?” I tried hard not to sound accusatory.

“No! Because I always take ‘em! I usually even silence the alarm before it goes off. But then the new phone and this whole you coming home thing began, and Callum came here…my head is in three different places these days. When I found the pills, I checked my phone and realized I hadn’t set the alarm and that I hadn’t taken them. This whole week I had this nagging feeling I was forgetting something.”

“Oh Meg…”

“I went online to see what to do and they say to start again on a double dose, to catch up but…the chance is there and now I don’t dare. I took ‘em out, they’re on the counter but there’s this tiny voice in my head goin’ ‘Noooooo. What if it’s true? Another little Nikkie. Or Nick.’ It’s driving me nuts, thinking about this so …. I need someone to tell me what to do. Sorry, you’re it. And I went to the drugstore, and got tests. Stupid! Those don’t work yet. I got five, sitting there, right next to the pills. Oh god, that’s so stupid. Why did I buy those? Kai…”

Christ, she was really freaking out.

“I can’t tell you what to do - I know nothing of this stuff. How long does it still work when you stop taking it? The pills, I mean?”

She sighed. “If you miss two, you’ve lost protection and it was four when he came here the first time. And he went to town like he was returning from war. Saw an ankle and made like a tom and cruise.”

I guffawed at that.

“It’s not funny!”

“Well, then stop saying funny stuff. I’m sorry, I…sorry.” I rubbed my face again. “Are you gonna tell him?”

“Not yet…too early. This’ll be the one time I’m looking forward to Pissy Missy Stuff©.”

I snorted inadvertently.

“I said it’s not funny! Stop laughing!? God, you’re such an asshole. Why did I call you?”

“I’m sorry,” I said, “I just haven’t heard that term in a couple of decades.”

When she’d started her cycles, it’d been Kellan who had termed PMS as such. I don’t know where he got it from, but it was apt.

“Be glad that you didn’t come to live with us, then. Nikki’s been at it for a while now. You’d have two Banshees screaming around the place.”

Thank God for small favors then. But she sounded calmer, now.

“I’m hoping that it’s just me being me and in like two weeks, it’ll be two-for-the-price-of-one Ketchup Day.”

Oh yuck… another one of Kellan’s. “What are you gonna do until then?”

“Freak out? Shout at the moon, yelling ‘why himmmmm’? Avoid him like the plague?”

“The guy knows where you live, hon,” I pointed out, chuckling.

“He’s on call this weekend and I got nights next week, starting on Monday, so that works out. Hopefully, by the end of next week, I get the painters in.”

“Painters? What?” I asked, confused. Talking to Megan was a challenge at times, she jumped from heel to branch.

“Get the painters in. Russians are coming. China’s invading. Y’know, Ketchup Day.”

Ooooh. Right.

“What if it doesn’t come?”

She grew quiet. “Then I guess you’re gonna be an uncle again.”

“So you’d keep it…”

“Honey, I’m 38. That’s a damn miracle. Of course I am. Why do you think that little voice showed up? I wasn’t waiting for it, but if it happens, it’s gonna happen.”

“And Callum?”

“What about him?”

“Are you gonna tell him then?”

She grew quiet again for quite a while. “He has the right, Kai. Of course I’m gonna tell him, once I’m sure. And this was my fault, I wasn’t careful. I’m just not looking forward to watching the dust settle, as he makes for the hills, like Tristan.”

Nikki’s dad.

“He’s not that guy, Meg. And I think you should tell him right away. This isn’t something you have to wait out alone. Let him sweat bullets too…” Not that I wanted that for either of them, but she shouldn’t have to go through that alone, again. I remembered the first time, when she came to me in the same predicament.

“It’s not really something to do over the phone?”

“Do you have another option?”

“No. Like I said - he's on call. But he’s texting me to death. I can’t leave my phone lying around - if Nik reads what that ass says to me at times, she’d need therapy sessions until she’s 21.”

I snickered. “Sexting?”

“No! Well, sometimes,” she snickered, definitely sounding calmer now. “No, no…just….stuff - wants to know everything, shares everything, too. Stuff you generally don’t ask or tell someone until you’re like half a year into a relationship.”

Really. Doc, you surprise me.

“Told ya he was intense.”

“Well - I really think you should tell him. If that has to be over the phone, then so be it. It’s the quickest way to find out that he’s not that guy. And since you wanted me to tell you what to do - that’s what I think you should do. Let him shit bricks too - that at least should appeal to you.”

“Okay. Now?”

“Yes now. Get it over with.”

“Alright. I’ll call you right back.”

“Okay. Bye hon.”

I hung up. It took less than five minutes for my phone to ring again. Unknown number.

“Hello?”

“Soldier.”

“Doc!”

Another call came through. Megan.

“I want your permission to marry your sister.”

“Umm…I…” Wow, that was fast. I didn't even know how to respond to that, or even form words.

“She’s pregnant. It’s mine. I’m a one-shot wonder!” He breathily snickered, 'huh-huh' like he was proud of himself.

“She told me that she might be. Doc, aren’t you a bit fast with this? It may not be anything other than Megan overreacting.”

“Nope. I know she is … I can just feel it. This was meant to happen. I knew it when I met her. That’s mommy. Fate, my man. My kid. No way I'm walkin’!”
Wow. Doc - 1. Tristan - 0.

“Actually, you should call Kellan. He’s the older brother, “ I smiled. I knew it. I knew he was not that guy.

“I will. Gimme his number. So, do I have your permission?”

“Welcome to the family. Maybe - she’ll say no, y‘know.”

“She can try.”

I laughed. Oh, this was going to be something. He clearly didn’t know Megan yet. But he would.

I gave him Kellan’s number and told him not to call before morning, then he hung up. Not two seconds later, my phone rang again. Megan.

“Why did I get voicemail? Who were you on the phone with?” She asked, sounding suspiciously. “Did that bastard call you? Already?”

I grinned. I couldn’t help it. I could already see them bickering away into old age. She’d give him a run for his money and he would do the same in turn.

“Ahuh. You were two seconds late.”

“You wanna know what he said to me?”

Oh, this would be a doozy. I reached for the water bottle, taking a sip.

“He said his spunk was too strong for my weak eggs and completely overpowered them, and that he was awesome.”

I snorted and coughed, spilling my drink. Oh yuck. From my nose!

“He’s an ass.”

“Well, that ass called to ask for permission to marry you,” I answered, still coughing, wiping the front of my t-shirt.

“Oh, screw that. Definitely not. I’m not getting married.”

“He’s gonna call Kellan in the morning, to ask his permission as well.”

“You didn’t tell him you were okay with that, right?”

“Of course I did - he’s a good man! I told you he’s not that guy, Meg. Believe me now? And apparently he wants to do the right thing, even if it’s not certain yet that you’re even pregnant. That should tell you something about him.”

“All that tells me is that he has stupid archaic notions. It’s not the 1950’s, for god sake. You don’t have to be married to have a kid. I should know - I have one.”

Maybe not, but I did approve of his ‘stupid archaic notions’. Maybe it was a male thing. Nice and archaic of me, too.

“Honey, if you keep slinging mud, you’re losing ground.”

“I’m not getting married! Period.”

A soft beep sounded on her end.

“Crap, he’s calling me.”

I chuckled. “Hon, he knows you’re awake. And you and I both know you’ll not be sleeping anytime soon. Talk to him. You just told him he might become a father. He’s probably freaking out too.”

“He wasn’t freaked - he was over the moon. First thing he said when I told him that there was a chance, he went ‘Oh fuck yeah!’.”

Ha! All for the better! What other reaction could she possibly ask for?

“There you go! That’s a great reaction. Hon, did you listen? That doesn’t sound like someone running for the hills, does it? Talk to him! If he has the time, why not. Remember - you’ve never had a guy who wants kids. He might just pleasantly surprise you. Even if he is an ass.”

She grew quiet again. “You think so?”

“Ahuh! I really do!”

It was rather sad to hear that tiny bit of hope as though she didn't believe that she was worthy of the devotion Doc showed due to her formerly disappointing relationships with men.

“Meg, you’re so used to every guy disappointing you, that you can’t see the good one right in front of you. Is it fast? Hell yes. Too fast. You’ve known him for less than a week.”

“Yeah, it’s a two-night stand gone horribly wrong.”
There she was. Dry sardonic Megan. That’s the one we needed now, not the freaking out one.

I chuckled. “Maybe not. Talk to him.

“I’m still not getting married.”

“Then you better hope Ketchup is on an unprecedented sale in a few days because I don’t think he’s gonna let up, if that’s not the case.”

She sighed. “Alright, I’ll call him. See you tomorrow?”

“That’d be great. Bring Nikki?”

“I’m not sure if she’ll be back in time, but I’ll ask her.”

I wished her a good night and hung up.

Oh boy. This was going to become a thing.