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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

Second Shot - 25. Chapter 25: Cause and Affect

I think many of you will disappointed with this chapter, but what happened to Peter, how bad it is - bad - and well - read on to find out.

Jason barely noticed the nurses and orderlies as he searched for Peter. With every room he passed, his stomach tightened. Room 313, Peter’s room, was nearly dark when he arrived. Inside, a nurse stood at the foot of the bed looking at something. Sitting beside the bed, near Peter’s head, Jason could see the arm of someone he assumed was Mrs. Gregory.

“Son, you are not permitted in here.” Old enough to be his mother, the nurse stopped what she was doing to direct Jason away. “Family only after 9:00 p.m.”

“But . . .” Jason wanted to say he was Peter’s boyfriend, but wasn’t sure how Mrs. Gregory felt about him announcing it here. “He’s my friend. Can’t I see him?”

“No.” She said firmly. “Visiting hours start at 9:00 tomorrow. Come back then.”

“Please!” He begged. “I need to see him.”

“Child,” she touched his arm gently, but maintained her position blocking the entrance. Speaking in a hushed voice she said, “He’s in a bad way, there isn’t a lot to see right now.”

“Jason?” He heard Mrs. Gregory’s voice. “Is that you?”

“Yes, ma’am,” he answered, trying to see around the nurse. Knowing he might not get in, he hurriedly asked, “How is he?”

Peter’s mom made it to the door, her eyes red and puffy. Streaks marked the lines where tears had rolled down her cheeks. She reached past the nurse to hug him and sobbed. “He’s in a coma. They beat him so bad, I hardly recognize him.”

He caught himself before he let out a cry. Coma? What the hell did they do him? How did they do it? Holding Peter’s mom, he wondered how she would feel if she knew what happened between him and her son.

Swallowing hard, he stifled his feelings as best he could. Right now she needed him to be strong for her. “He’ll make it. He’s a strong person.”

Clinging to him, she continued to cry on his shoulder. The nurse peered into the hallway, checking both directions before she motioned him inside. “If anyone asks you’re his cousin,” she told him as he walked past.

Prepared as he thought he was, he gasped when he saw the swollen, puffy face lying back against the pillows. This close, he couldn’t hold back his tears. The cardiac monitor flashed silently to his left, with Erin sitting next to it, holding her brother’s hand. She gave him the barest smile upon seeing him, as if he was part of the family. He couldn’t meet her stare, not now. He wasn’t there when this happened like he should have.

Fixing his gaze at Peter’s battered face, he struggled to see through his tears. “Do you know what happened?”

“The police said six guys attacked him.” Erin’s face tightened as she recounted how her brother was injured. “One had a bat.”

“What?” Jason couldn't grasp what happened. “Who . . . who was it? Do they know?”

“It was that asshole Jordan who started it,” she spat. “He couldn't face Peter alone, so he ambushed him with those other pricks from his fraternity.”

Jason stared blankly at her as words failed him. Oh god, did he bring this on by rejecting Jordan’s attempt to patch things up? Did Jordan blame Peter for the ending of their friendship?

Erin stroked her brother’s hand, new tears rolling down her face.

“Officer Bennett saved his life.” Mrs. Gregory said, followed by a sniff.

“Bennett?” Jason didn’t recognize the name.

“Yes,” she nodded her head. “The detective said he happened to be in the area and saw the fight begin. He nearly shot the boy with the bat to make him stop.”

“Did they arrest anyone?” Jason didn’t know what else to ask. Over and over he saw his and Peter’s last words; the ones Jason shouted at him before storming out. His body jerked and he couldn’t breath for a moment. Those couldn’t be the last words they spoke to each other, he had to get a chance to make it right.

“All six.” The venom in Erin’s voice chilled him. “The Detective also said there is a video that captured the fight. They’re all gonna fry.”

“Erin,” her mother admonished.

“What? They deserve it. They had no right to do this, NONE!” Her voice was just shy of a shout. “I hope they get raped every day in jail.”

Ignoring her anger, Jason reached out to give her a hug. She hesitated at first, then collapsed against his chest sobbing. Much as he didn’t want to, Jason’s body shook with is own grief. Holding back as much of his own emotions as he could, he let her cling to him, whispering softly through his tears that everything would be okay.

He knew how much Peter and Erin meant to each other. She was always there for him, no matter what. Comforting those who meant the most to Peter was the only thing Jason could do for him right now. This time he wouldn’t walk out on Peter.

After several long moments, she sniffed, looking up. “Sorry, Jason, no offense.”

“It’s okay, I agree with you.” He tried to give her a reassuring smile, but it wouldn’t come out. “What have the doctors said?”

“It’s too early to tell.” Mrs. Gregory said softly. “They cracked a bone in his back, broke his left arm, fractured his eye socket and cheek, broke his nose and he has fluid on the brain.” Her voice trailed off to a whisper as she recounted her son’s injuries. “He isn’t responding to stimulus right now because he is in a coma, so we won’t know if he can walk until he wakes up. If he wakes up.”

She started crying again, harder this time. Moving to her side, Jason pulled her close as she sobbed. “Don’t say that, he’s going to make it. He’s strong.”

Sniffing, she wiped her eyes. Jason found a box of tissues that he offered to her. Plucking several, she balled them up to wipe her eyes.

“You two stay with him, I need to call his father.” She did not wait for their answer before walking out.

Keeping her focus on her brother’s face, as if she might miss a blink of the eye or a movement, Erin ignored Jason as he wondered what he should do.

This was his fault. If he hadn’t left like he did, Peter wouldn’t have come looking for him. No doubt Jordan found Peter, spewing his usual homophobic taunts. Given how angry Peter must have been, it was probably enough to provoke a response.

“He never saw them coming,” he muttered.

“What?” Erin asked.

“Jordan must have set this up so Peter wouldn’t notice the others until it was too late.”

“What happened today?” she asked him pointedly. “I spoke to Peter an hour or so before the attack. He was really upset. He wouldn’t say why or what happened. In fact, he denied anything was wrong, but I knew there was.

She knew, he thought. All she wanted was confirmation before she lash out at him. He tried to swallow, but found his mouth too dry. “We had a fight.”

Even that small acknowledgment wracked him with guilt. Was it really a fight or was it Jason being weak?

“About what?” she pressed.

“Me, I suppose. Us. I don’t know.” He searched for the right words. “I told him I was thinking of going to the ex-gay classes my mother was pushing for.”

“You broke up with him?”

“No.” The truth gave conviction to his words. “He told me he would break up with me if I went.”

“That doesn’t sound like Peter,’ Erin replied. “He totally loves you.”

“I know,” he whispered, unable to meet her stare. “But he said if I couldn't say no to my mom about the classes, he didn’t want me around.”

“What did you say?” Erin didn’t hide her anger.

“I told him I needed to think about it.” He finally looked at her, trying to see past his tears. “All I wanted was some time to work through the consequences of saying no.”

“I thought you loved him.” Squinting, her face hardened. “Peter told me you said you loved him. Why did you lie to him?”

“I didn’t.” He never stopped loving Peter. The threat of being left to fend for himself, left him scared to say no to his mother, but it did change his feeling for Peter. Seeing her doubt, he continued. “Really, I didn’t lie to him. I did, do love him. But I am, . . . my mom gave me an ultimatum, go or get cut off. If they did that, I would have to leave school.”

“You let your parents tell you who to love?” She asked sarcastically. “That’s pathetic.”

“I know.”

“You should probably go,” she said. “I don’t think it would be good for Peter to see you if he wakes up.”

“What? No, I can’t go.” He knew she was angry and needed to lash out, but he couldn’t leave. “Look, it was a fight, but I didn’t break up with him. I was sitting on the stairs in his hallway waiting to tell him I wasn’t going when . . . he was out looking for me.”

She shook her head. “Think of him and not you. Your presence will only make him more upset. You really need to go.”

“No.” Mrs. Gregory said from the doorway. She was not alone.

Framed in the bright white light from the hall, it was difficult to make out the man’s face. Before either could say a word, the nurse walked back.

“Sir, it’s after general visiting hours, family only are allowed to be here.”

“I’m his uncle.” Jason recognized the voice.

“Uncle?” She didn’t sound convinced.

“Yes, I’m his uncle by marriage.” Mister Lee stepped further into the room so Jason could see his face.

“He is married to my ex-husband’s sister.” Ms. Gregory took up the story, almost daring the nurse to say she was lying.

Erin recovered her composure as the two debated Mister Lee’s ties to Peter. “Uncle Lee, I didn’t recognize you in the dim light.”

“It is good to see you too little Erin.” He kissed the top of her head.

Whether she believed he really was Peter’s uncle, she did not renew her request for him to leave. Shaking her head, she walked away muttering how she was getting soft in her old age.

The older man walked over to the bed, gently touching his student’s forehead. Jason noticed Lee’s jaw quiver slightly as he ran his fingers gently over Peter’s head.

“Jason can stay,” Mrs. Gregory said. “It won’t upset Peter if he sees Jason.”

“Did you hear what happened between them?” Erin glared at him.

“I heard enough to know they had a disagreement.”

“One argument, no matter the outcome, could not quench what I know was in Peter’s heart.” Mister Lee added without turning from his student. “For a time he might have been angry, but at his core, he loves Jason. Of that I am certain.”

He turned his gaze on Jason. “If, however, you are not prepared to return his love, you should go. His recovery will be long and difficult, do not complicate it with your own indecision.”

“I never stopped loving him,” Jason said.

Mister Lee did not appear satisfied. “Let me rephrase my statement. If you are not prepared to be with him, you should leave now.”

Erin picked her head up, waiting to hear his answer. Could he really say he would never get cold feet again? Never need space to sort things out? No, he couldn't say that. For a moment he debated leaving, taking to heart Erin’s words to think of Peter and not himself. Instead he walked toward the door and moved a chair closer. “Like I said, I was looking for him to let him know I chose him.”

“Damn!” Mrs. Gregory said, her attention locked on her phone.

“Mom, what’s wrong?” Erin asked

“That stupid bimbo your father married is such a . . . .” She fumbled for the right word, but her anger held her back.

“Jerk?” Jason offered.

“Worse, but that will have to do.” She snorted. “I told her that Peter was critically injured and I needed Thomas’ cell phone so I could call him. I only have his home number. She told me under no circumstances would she give me Tommy’s new number.” Her voice turned shrill when she used the woman’s pet name for her ex-husband.

“She told me she would take a message and have him call back when he returned from Dallas.”

“Did you tell her Peter might be dead by then?” Erin caught herself too late.

“No, because he won’t be,” Mrs. Gregory said in steely voice.

“I can get you Mr. Gregory’s number,” Jason offered.

“What?” She looked confused.

“Yes, Mrs. Gregory, Peter has it.”

“Amanda.”

“Excuse me, ma’am?”

“Call me Amanda.” She managed a weak smile. “Mrs. Gregory sounds so old.”

“Yes, ma’am.” He felt uncomfortable using her first name. “Is Peter’s phone around?”

“I have it.” She grabbed a small bag beside the bed. “The paramedics gave it to the nurses when they brought Peter here.”

Rummaging through her purse, she pulled out Peter’s blackberry. Turning the phone over in her hand, she dropped it Jason’s hand. “You do it. I have no idea how that contraption works.”

Jason unlocked the phone, thumbing through the numbers until he found Thomas Gregory’s name. Pressing the call button, he tried to hand the phone to Amanda, but she and Erin were holding Peter’s hands.

“Hey, Peter!” He heard a voice on the other end.

“Sorry Mr. Gregory this is Jason.”

“Jason?”

“Peter’s . . . er . . . friend,” He said.

“Why are you calling me on his phone?”

“Peter’s been hurt, sir. Hurt real bad.” Jason choked before he could continue.

“WHAT?!?” Thomas yelled so loud everyone in the room turned toward the source. “What happened?”

Jason struggled to open his mouth without sobbing, drawing two breaths in the process.

“Give me the phone.” Amanda held out her hand.

Relieved to not have to keep talking to Peter’s father, Jason quickly did as she requested.

“Thomas, this is Amanda. I tried to call you, but Boopsie wouldn’t give me your cell number.”

“Her name is Becky.” Jason heard him growl

“Whatever, Peter got beat up by a group of boys. He is in a coma.” The words came out in a rush, but that was a far as she got before she started crying again.

Jason heard Thomas Gregory repeat something several times, his voice getting louder each time. Steadying himself, he gently took the phone from Amanda’s hand.

“Sorry sir, she can’t speak right now.” His voice was barely more than a whisper.

“What happened?”

“A guy named Jordan, who hated Peter, ambushed him with five of his friends. Someone had a baseball bat. They kicked and stomped him pretty bad before a police offer stopped it.” Jason had to stop several times during the brief explanation. Each time he closed his eyes tight, remembering this is what Peter would want him to do.

When he stopped speaking, Jason was greeted by silence. Finally a shaken voice asked, “How is my boy?”

Jason swallowed hard. He needed to control his emotions to do this for Peter. “He has a lot of injuries. I don’t know them all, but they broke a bone in his back, his arm, his eye socket and he has fluid on the brain. He’s . . . he's in bad shape, sir.”

“Where are you?” Thomas managed. Jason thought he heard him crying.

“County General, sir. Do you need me to text you the address?”

“No, no, I know where it is.” This time Jason was sure Peter’s dad was crying. He kept quiet, not knowing what else to say.

Finally Thomas spoke, “Can you see if Amanda can speak to me again?”

“Yes, sir.” He held the phone away out, hopeful she could talk. He was at the limits of his ability to keep his emotions in check. After talking about Peter’s injuries, he wanted to curl up and cry. Acting as a go between for the two would be too hard. “Mrs. Gregory . . . Amanda, Mr. Gregory would like to speak to you again.”

She wiped her eyes, took a deep breath, then held her hand out for the phone. “Yes, Tom.”

She stepped away so that Jason couldn't hear what Mr. Gregory was saying.

“Yes, Tom,” she repeated. “Yes, yes, you can stay with me. This isn’t about you and me.”

Another pause while Peter’s dad spoke. Amanda turned to look at Jason and Mister Lee. “Yes, I will get someone to pick you.”

Both men nodded they would do that.

“What?” Tear started to flow down her face again. “Yes, Tom, it is. Hurry.”

She looked at the key board, a finger poised over the buttons. Frustrated she handed the phone to Jason. “Here, turn this off please.”

“Yes ma’am.”

“He’s going to book the first flight he can and let me know the details,” she told no one in specific.

“I can go get him,” Mister Lee volunteered.

“Me too,” Jason added, trying to be useful.

The older man shook his head, meeting his gaze. “No, you should stay here.”

Jason stared at Mister Lee before he nodded.

“How long has Peter been talking to Tom?” Amanda asked him.

Jason noted she did not sound pleased by this. “I’m not sure ma’am. As long as I have known him he and his dad talked.”

“They talk all the time mom. Peter started calling him about two years ago.”

“You knew?” Amanda faced Erin, stunned by the news. “Do you talk to him too?”

Erin shook her head. “Peter keeps asking me to call him, but I was old enough to remember, he wasn’t.”

“Why would he do this?”

“It is not about you Mrs. Gregory.” Mister Lee said. “He wanted his father to be a part of his life. I suggested he call Thomas Gregory if that is what he wanted.”

“You encouraged him to go behind my back?” Amanda’s voice wavered, but Jason didn’t know if it was because Peter was hurt or he had been talking to his father.

“Peter is a man now. I told him a man must make his own choices and live with the consequences,” he told her. “When he sought my advice on whether to call, I told him to follow his heart.”

No one said much for a long time. Peter’s blackberry broke their silence, buzzing on the night stand. Jason answered it when he saw “Dad” flashing on the screen. Searching for something to write down the information, he finally found a pen, but had to use a paper towel to write on.

After he confirmed the information he jotted down was correct, he gave the phone to Mister Lee. From the conversation Jason could hear, they were discussing where to meet and how they would recognize each other.

Having all he needed, Mister Lee turned off the phone, setting it gently on the table.

“I will see you tomorrow after I pick up Thomas. Gregory.” He gave Erin and Amanda a hug. Nodding to Jason, he said, “You should go home to get some sleep.”

“No, I can’t go right now.” Jason refused to meet Mister Lee’s eyes. “I left him once today.”

Grabbing Jason by the shoulders, the older man forced him to look up. “You are not the cause of what happened today. Those who did this would have found another time to do this.”

Jason didn’t answer, what could he say?

“Goodnight.” Mister Lee said to the room as he left.

********


Jason didn’t remember much else about that night. He woke in the chair next to Peter’s bed covered by a blanket. The sun was just beginning to light the room, enough for him to see Erin and her mom similarly covered in chairs across the bed.

Pushing the blanket aside, he got up to use the restroom. In the mirror he noted he needed a shave. He rubbed the stubble, then splashed water on his face. After he rubbed the sleep from his eyes, he realized it was Thursday; he had biology at 10:00 a.m.

“Too bad,” he said to his reflection. He wasn’t going to class until he knew Peter would be okay.

Drying his face, he opened the door, almost walking into someone.

“Whoa,” he said before he could catch himself.

A black man in a blue shirt and striped tie stood just outside the bathroom door. Jason saw the gun holstered on his waist before he noticed the badge hanging from a chain on his neck. But for the hint of gray in the officer’s temples, Jason would have suspected he was not much older than he and Peter.

“Are you Jason Tellerman?” the man asked.

“Yes sir.” Jason looked at the man warily. “Who are you?”

Reaching for his badge, he turned it around to show Jason his police identification card. “Detective Belle. I need to ask you some questions if you don’t mind.”

“Do I have to?” Jason asked. “I mean do I have to do it right now? I don’t want to leave.”

“Now would be best. We’re trying to put the paperwork together to file charges against the six who did this,” Detective Belle said. “It won’t take long.”

Turning back toward Peter, Jason felt a pull back toward his friend, but nodded anyway. “Ok.”

Giving Amanda and Erin a wave, Detective Belle directed him out into the hallway. “The hospital has a small room they let us use when we are investigating crimes,” he explained as they walked.

At the end of the hall, they turned right before stopping in front of a room with no window. Belle opened the door, motioning for Jason to go inside. Just past the detective’s shoulder, Jason could see a second man sitting inside.

“Am I under arrest?” Jason remained in the hallway.

“No son, you’re not even a suspect.” Belle sounded sincere. “We’re trying to get as much background information we can. We were told you were once good friends with Jordan Colmar.”

“Yeah, I was.” Jason shook his head. “But he didn’t like the fact I was gay.”

“C’mon, let’s talk in private,” Belle suggested.

“Do I need a lawyer?” Jason heard detectives tricked people into talking by pretending they weren’t going to arrest someone.

“You’re always free to have a lawyer present,” Belle explained. “But, as I said, we really only want to talk about stuff that happened before the attack. Anything you can tell us might help convict Jordan and his co-defendants.”

Jason hesitated, he wanted to believe them. No, what he really wanted was to help put Jordan away for what he did. Pushing aside his fears for himself, he entered the room. Three chairs, two on one side of a small white table, and a third on the other side against the wall. The second detective, an older white man in khakis and a white shirt, motioned Jason toward the lone chair across the table from him.

Jason stared at the man’s badge as he scribbled a few notes on a stenographer’s pad in front of him. A few business cards sat on the table next to the pad. Detective Belle shut the door, then moved the second chair around the table until he was on the same side as Jason, sitting in front of the door.

“If I’m not under arrest, how come you’re blocking the door?” Jason asked.

“Listen son,” the second officer said. “I’m not sure how else we can say it, but you aren’t in any trouble.”

Belle laughed. “Sorry Jason, old habits.” He shrugged. “This is how we’re taught to do interviews, for our safety and to prevent escapes. We can trade seats if you feel more comfortable.”

“No sir, that’s ok.” He shook his head to emphasis the point. “I’m tired and afraid for Peter.”

The older detective smiled sympathetically. “You’re Peter’s boyfriend?”

Jason nodded. “Yes, but we had a fight right before this happened.”

“What I meant was, you and he are close, you’re allowed to worry for him.” The man gave him a smile that seemed genuine.

“Jason,” Detective Belle said. “I don’t want to pressure you, but we really need to get as much information as possible. If you don’t feel comfortable speaking to us, we can wait.”

“No, if this will help, I want to do it.” Jason took a deep breath. “What do you want to know?”

“Good.” Belle smiled at him. Jason found he trusted the man, even though he knew that was part of the routine.

“As I told you already, I’m Detective Belle. This is my partner, Detective Dravek.” Dravek slid two business cards across the table toward Jason.

Jason picked them up. One said Detective Joshua Belle, his badge number, a phone number and other information. Dravek’s said Gilbert “Bud” Dravek, Detective Sergeant.

“First thing, do you need anything? Coffee? Bagel? Juice?” Belle pointed toward a box of Starbuck’s coffee, along with some pastries on the end of the table.

“Coffee and a donut would be great.” Jason realized how hungry he was once he saw the food.

Both men snorted. “Not all cops eat donuts you know,” Dravek said as he tossed Jason a bagel. “Have a wheat bagel, it’s good for you.”

A small sigh escaped his throat. Peter would have said the same thing.

“Thank you.” He remembered to say as he bit into the bagel while pouring himself some coffee.

“Feel better?” Belle asked.

“Yes, sir.”

“Good.” Belle flipped through the page of his notebook. “How long have you known Jordan Colmar?”

“We were friends since were five.” Taking a drink Jason added, “We played soccer together through high school.”

“Good friends?” Belle asked.

“I thought so, but I guess not really.”

“What do you mean?” Dravek asked.

“Well,” Jason drank some more coffee trying to find the right words. “He stopped speaking to me the day he found out I was gay. In fact he made it a point to tell the entire school, our old friends, anyone he could think of I was gay. Then for shits and giggles, he had his mom tell all my mother’s friends, so it would get back to her.”

“Some friend,” Belle commented.

Jason nodded, biting into his food.

“When was the first time you noticed trouble with Jordan and Peter?” Belle asked.

“Week after Valentine’s Day, this year.” Jason frowned thinking about that day.

“What happened?” the detective asked.

While he finished his food, Jason relayed the night’s events.

Still writing, Detective Belle asked, “Anything else happen?”

“Not between Jordan and Peter,” Jason replied.

“How about you and Jordan?” The detective asked.

“Other than him telling everyone he could I was gay, no.” Jason rolled his eyes. “He and I only spoke once since that night.”

“What happened?”

Even now, talking about Jordan made him unsettled. “He tried to apologize before this semester started. I told him I didn’t believe him and we would never be friends again. I think he was afraid I will kick his ass for what he did to me.”

“Would you have?” Dravek looked up from his note book.

“Fuck yeah.” Jason made his feelings clear. “That asshole tried to ruin my life. He tried to get me kicked off the soccer team, the school, he drove a huge wedge between me and my mom.”

Detective Belle wrote something down in his book. “Describe Darryl.”

“Tall, maybe 6’3,’’ dark hair, kind of built, not skinny not fat.”

“White or black?”

“Black, medium complexion.”

“What about Wendy?” Dravek asked. “Are they a couple?”

Jason snorted and shook his head. The detectives were too busy writing to see his answer.

“What was that?” Belle asked.

“No.” Jason replied. “I need to use the bathroom.”

Belle stood up, open the door and let Jason out. Jason noticed the detective was following him.

“I can do this by myself. Jason said.

“I know you can son,” the detective said. “But I need to go too.”

Jason laughed. “Sorry.”

Jason's friends prove that something friends are thicker than family.
Copyright © 2011 Andrew Q Gordon; All Rights Reserved.
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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 
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I got teary a second time. I intended to skim read, having read the chapter already (hehe, I'm so lucky) but I got sucked into it again. Man, I feel for Jason. And Peter. :(

 

I think you are going to have a hard time waiting very long between chapters before posting. At this point the gut is clenched, and I think you're going to have some readers demanding you post fast, fast and fast.

 

Will Peter pull through? Or will Jason have a whole lot of heart ache to contend with? How will it reflect in his relationships to both friends and family? Ahhhhhhh... Good thing I don't bite my nails. I'm sure they'd be bloody by now, lol.

 

Your really big fan,

Anyta :)

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A touching chapter and very well done, Andy. I trust Peter will survive. I think Mr. Lee has given Jason some very good advice about a man making his own decisions, following his own heart.

 

Mike

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I thought the chapter was good :) Not what I was expecting with the gay bashing but an interesting twist. I really hope Jordan gets what he deserves and Peter pulls through with no permanent injury. I think this could make Jason and Peter a stronger couple in the long run. Can't wait for the next chapter now :)

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Will Peter pull through? Or will Jason have a whole lot of heart ache to contend with? Ahhhhhhh... Good thing I don't bite my nails. I'm sure they'd be bloody by now..

 

It's a good thing Anyta.. however, i do.. and I'm looking at my nails... and there's nothing left to chew... :( my fingertips are already pulp!

 

Please write faster Andy... The fate of the Karate kid is in your hands!

The Soccer Boy is in too much pain! sad.gif

 

hugs,

Frosty

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Good chapter, though i have to say, having a hard time feeling sympathetic to Peter and Erin's positions, as far as Jason's choices go. I'd have decked both. lol

 

That said, I certainly hope that the two are able to mend their relationship. I'm wondering if St. Barbara is involved in Jordan's attack. . .

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On 12/31/2010 08:34 AM, AnytaSunday said:
I got teary a second time. I intended to skim read, having read the chapter already (hehe, I'm so lucky) but I got sucked into it again. Man, I feel for Jason. And Peter. :(

 

I think you are going to have a hard time waiting very long between chapters before posting. At this point the gut is clenched, and I think you're going to have some readers demanding you post fast, fast and fast.

 

Will Peter pull through? Or will Jason have a whole lot of heart ache to contend with? How will it reflect in his relationships to both friends and family? Ahhhhhhh... Good thing I don't bite my nails. I'm sure they'd be bloody by now, lol.

 

Your really big fan,

Anyta :)

Thanks Anyta, not just for reading but for helping me - you are an amazing friend for all the help you have given me - As for whether Peter will pull through hmmm, only two people know what happens to the end - and hopefully my beta reader won't tell anyone :D
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On 12/31/2010 08:54 AM, MikeL said:
A touching chapter and very well done, Andy. I trust Peter will survive. I think Mr. Lee has given Jason some very good advice about a man making his own decisions, following his own heart.

 

Mike

Thanks Mike, I was hoping Peter's mentor being his Martial Arts Instructor didn't come off as cheesy but given how non-existent dad has been, his teacher sort of filled in the gaps. Can't say what will happen, that would be giving away too much but, I can say it will more than a few chapters until we find out what happens to peter - sorry, won't be waking up in the next chapter or three.
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On 12/31/2010 09:48 AM, Nephylim said:
Thank you for the beauty amongst the pain. Now I have two on my hit list *growl*
Twenty five was actually the first chapter I wrote - everything built around this one, don't ask me why this is the point from which the story grew, but it was the focus of the entire story - the rest of it sort of took shape to fill out this part. Hopefully by the end it will all fit nicely together. Thanks for all the encouragement, you are as I said before, a wonderful person, dark lady or not :)
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On 12/31/2010 01:21 PM, Hermetically Sealed said:
Good chapter, though i have to say, having a hard time feeling sympathetic to Peter and Erin's positions, as far as Jason's choices go. I'd have decked both. lol

 

That said, I certainly hope that the two are able to mend their relationship. I'm wondering if St. Barbara is involved in Jordan's attack. . .

Barbara is many things, but not behind this. She still is going to figure in these events, She isn't done by any means. But for Peter being beaten almost to death, I wonder if Erin would be so heartless - and by that I mean, she would probably sit Peter down and smack some sense into him. Here, well she is scared, angry and without anyone to lash out at. When she hears about what happens between the two, she over reacts, at least until Amanda sets things straight. As for Peter - well I can't say more just yet. :D. Thanks for taking the time to comment, I appreciate all the feed back. [Awesome screen name by the way :) ] Andy
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On 12/31/2010 11:23 AM, Frostina said:
Will Peter pull through? Or will Jason have a whole lot of heart ache to contend with? Ahhhhhhh... Good thing I don't bite my nails. I'm sure they'd be bloody by now..

 

It's a good thing Anyta.. however, i do.. and I'm looking at my nails... and there's nothing left to chew... :( my fingertips are already pulp!

 

Please write faster Andy... The fate of the Karate kid is in your hands!

The Soccer Boy is in too much pain! sad.gif

 

hugs,

Frosty

Sorry Frosty but you might want to get some thick leather gloves, it will be several chapters before we find out what the prognosis is for Peter - sorry but it wasn't a little tap on the head, it was a serious beat down that, if he survives, will not resolve itself over night. Writing faster isn't the issue, posting faster is what you really want - two a week until I get closer to the end. That's about as much as I can promise AND still stay employed :)
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On 12/31/2010 10:20 AM, Simonjames30 said:
I thought the chapter was good :) Not what I was expecting with the gay bashing but an interesting twist. I really hope Jordan gets what he deserves and Peter pulls through with no permanent injury. I think this could make Jason and Peter a stronger couple in the long run. Can't wait for the next chapter now :)
Everyone kept thinking accident, it is a good thing this was the very first chapter I wrote of the story or else everyone would think I changed it just to avoid the common perception that he had a motorcycle accident. As for Jordan, his fate will be revealed at the end - promise. Thanks for reading and taking the time to write me. Next Chapter should be up Monday.
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Andy, I didn't even consider a gay bashing, duh. Anywho, good chapter, it's so easy to get sucked into the scene playing out in this chapter. I'm surprised that Jordan's Frat brothers would help him, I thought he was a peon to them?

 

Peters out for awhile but that means we get to see Darryl and Wendy fleshed out a bit as characters. Which, despite the grim circumstances, I'm still anticipating what your planning next. Jason's going through quite a dark trial and his friends are going to be a big part in what to end up as a person at the end, regardless of what happens with Peter.

 

I'll save speculation about Peter for later, I'm curious about how gritty and real you want to make the conclusion.

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On 12/31/2010 03:50 PM, Caedus said:
Andy, I didn't even consider a gay bashing, duh. Anywho, good chapter, it's so easy to get sucked into the scene playing out in this chapter. I'm surprised that Jordan's Frat brothers would help him, I thought he was a peon to them?

 

Peters out for awhile but that means we get to see Darryl and Wendy fleshed out a bit as characters. Which, despite the grim circumstances, I'm still anticipating what your planning next. Jason's going through quite a dark trial and his friends are going to be a big part in what to end up as a person at the end, regardless of what happens with Peter.

 

I'll save speculation about Peter for later, I'm curious about how gritty and real you want to make the conclusion.

Geez Imo, did you get a copy on the next few chapters??? :) Yes to all you said. As for Jordan, remember when we first learned of him and his fraternity it was about a year prior to this incident. Now he is a Junior and one of the older members of his fraternity. So he is no longer the peon and low man on the pole. Um that and it was literary license since I needed there to be a few people or else how would anyone believe he took out Peter? Hopefully the next few chapters keep everyone engaged, there isn't going to be a quick resolution of this so I hope I don't bore you all. Thanks my friend, I always like hearing from you. Andy
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OMG... I did not see this coming. After that little "Forgive me Jason" bit from Jordan I didn't think he will actually do anything like this. But I guess when your oldest friend say he didn't want to be friends with you anymore, some stupid idiots tend to do things like this, hey.

 

It's a really great chapter. I feel for Jason & Peter. Especially Jason for what he has in line. He's emotionally a wreck & on Friday he has to deal with Barbra. It won't help his cause. Hope his friends can keep him together.

 

I don't think I can co-op with 2 chapters a week. I'm so addicted I need the next chapter as soon as I finish one... so if it's what you have to offer I'll take it under 1 condition: You better have a happy ending for this story.... at least for Jase & Pete

 

Looking forward to chap. 26.

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On 01/01/2011 12:42 AM, boiwonder said:
OMG... I did not see this coming. After that little "Forgive me Jason" bit from Jordan I didn't think he will actually do anything like this. But I guess when your oldest friend say he didn't want to be friends with you anymore, some stupid idiots tend to do things like this, hey.

 

It's a really great chapter. I feel for Jason & Peter. Especially Jason for what he has in line. He's emotionally a wreck & on Friday he has to deal with Barbra. It won't help his cause. Hope his friends can keep him together.

 

I don't think I can co-op with 2 chapters a week. I'm so addicted I need the next chapter as soon as I finish one... so if it's what you have to offer I'll take it under 1 condition: You better have a happy ending for this story.... at least for Jase & Pete

 

Looking forward to chap. 26.

I promise as I get closer to the end, I will post quicker - I just want to get all the chapters edited and ready before I start posting faster. As for a happy ending - not sure I can promise that. Sorry - :/ If Peter survives they have a lot to work out - OMG I sound like Nephylim when we were pestering her about Rowan and Astrin in Hostage. I am pretty close to having it all done, so it won't be two a week for too long - that much I can promise. :)
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Arggggg!!!!!!I felt like I was standing in a hospital room. The characters have seemingly taken on their persona and played out like they were real... just my humble opinion. Cant wait for the next one...

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On 01/01/2011 08:25 AM, swscratch said:
Arggggg!!!!!!I felt like I was standing in a hospital room. The characters have seemingly taken on their persona and played out like they were real... just my humble opinion. Cant wait for the next one...
Hey, thanks for commenting, always appreciate it - Glad you could feel the characters - Anyta has been working overtime helping me bring out that part of the story - she hates when I give her kudos but its true. I hope things stay as focused going forward. The ending has me worried the most - but we have a bit to go before that. Andy
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Wow, just wow. It probably took me two hours just to get through this chapter. It's kind of hard to read words on the screen through teary eyes. :)

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On 01/26/2011 07:08 AM, TrevorTime said:
Wow, just wow. It probably took me two hours just to get through this chapter. It's kind of hard to read words on the screen through teary eyes. :)
Sorry for the tears but that was the effect i was going for, sadly, I have not gotten to the resolution of what happens to Peter yet so you can't read to the end and find out. It will be another two chapters beyond what is posted for that. But soon, I am doing well on the unwritten chapters I think. Thanks for reading Trev. :)
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Jeez ,this story is so addicting! I hope Peter is okay. He's not dead yet please don't kill him...I would have to track Jordan down and kick his @ss!!! For the first time- I'm glad that I'm new and behind everyone 'cause If I had to wait to find out what happens that would so suck! :P

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On 06/27/2011 04:05 AM, K.C. said:
Jeez ,this story is so addicting! I hope Peter is okay. He's not dead yet please don't kill him...I would have to track Jordan down and kick his @ss!!! For the first time- I'm glad that I'm new and behind everyone 'cause If I had to wait to find out what happens that would so suck! :P
Addicting? Wow, that's one like :) As for being about to keep reading, yeah, I was getting a lot of requests to post faster around this time :P When I wrote this part I didn't want it to be - hurt okay, all better now. Nor did I want it to be just a few paragraphs of recap. I wanted to show how it affected everyone else too.
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Now I understand what you meant by saying that the story gets better and better wink.png I love this story ! Gonna search for more tissues now aleric-cry.gif

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On 08/13/2012 05:43 AM, Slytherin said:
Now I understand what you meant by saying that the story gets better and better wink.png I love this story ! Gonna search for more tissues now aleric-cry.gif
I don't think I said better AND better, just one better was all I suggested. :P I fear there might - not saying for sure, but there might be a few more scenes that require tissues. But I don't know that a whole box is needed.

 

Glad you're enjoying it, sorry about the tissue expense.

 

Andy

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This story is so good! I was hooked immediately, probably because I myself am in college and young adult/ coming of age stories are what appeals to me. When Peter got hurt, I was devastated for him and Jason. I need to take a break, and pace the rest of the story so I can focus on my finals right now haha. Can't wait to keep reading and I appreciate the time it took to write this.

Miguel

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