I am only a little Gypsy 1 - Reincarnation, does it exist? - 15. Chapter 15. I am still too small; and Felicia bears twins.

The next morning, my still worried parents wanted to take me to our Wise Woman first, to let her take a professional look at my too slowly growing 'tiny runt' body. Although my bright brainiac brain was developing extremely fast, my body just stayed too small and obviously didn't grow enough. Compared to any other more than two years old children in our camp, I still was and stayed the shortest one. Yet, my thoroughly trained muscles were already much stronger than most other children, and I could win nearly all our friendly wrestling contests with surprising ease. Therefore, none of my infant friends ever confronted me with my clearly too small body, except for now and then teasingly calling me 'our little runt'.

Before I followed my parents, I first trotted to my already waiting infant friends, and explained that I had to visit our Wise Woman because my still too tiny body didn't want to grow taller... After all my worried looking friends slapped my small shoulders and wished me all the best, I quickly returned to my parents and followed them towards our Wise Woman who had already opened her caravan door in advance. Clearly, she was using the same Shaman technique of sensing other people's auras in advance that I always used! With a big smile on her face, she invited my parents and me in.

Inside her caravan, I looked around curiously at all her interesting glass containers that were containing the most diverse collections of strange looking herbs that I had ever seen. Next, she invited me to sit down next to her on her couch. For quite some time, she only looked me over from head to foot, whilst staring at my small body with her piercing eyes. Then, she started to ask my parents and me several rather annoying questions about my usual eating habits and bowel movements. Fortunately, none of our answers seemed to disturb her. At last, she asked us to be silent, because she wanted to consult our Beloved Ancestors and surrounding Spirit Friends about my bodily health. After closing her eyes, she almost immediately sank into a very deep trance, obviously to ask my Beloved Ancestor Friends and Cosmic Spirit Guides for their professional advice.

A few minutes later, our Wise Woman came out of her trance, opened her suddenly watery looking eyes, and first drank some water to recover. Then, she blew her nose and dried her still watery looking eyes with a few tissues. After also taking a couple of deep breaths, she was ready to tell us the truth about my too small body...

Smilingly, she advised my parents and me not to worry anymore about my too slow development! One of our Beloved Ancestors had explained that my body didn't grow enough because my extremely bright brain had been developing too fast and therefore demanded too much of my energy. Fortunately, my body would still grow up in excellent health, and my Beloved Ancestor had also foretold that my size would probably catch up with my age soon after I had reached puberty. Until then, I would probably stay a little bit shorter than most other children of around my age...

Well, I was sure I would be able to live with that! Happily, my parents and I thanked our Wise Woman for her professional advice, before we left her caravan and went home, to talk some more first, and then devour my Mom's usual 'healthy lunch'. That same afternoon, immediately when I returned to my 'infant friends', all of them left their games and crowded around me. Of course, they wanted to know what could have happened to their too small Crown Prince, and when would I finally grow up some more and no longer be our 'littlest runt'? Proudly, I told my friends that my too small size would probably catch up with my age soon after I had reached puberty!

In the meantime, several 'minors' were already showing up from our surrounding woods and preparing their caught animals. One of them, Misha, first listened carefully to my story, and then thought that my too small body would probably go through a 'growth spurt' first, as every normal and healthy young kid had to go through from time to time. I only had to be more patient...

Thank you very much, Misha, but 'being patient' wasn't exactly my strongest quality! Yet, I decided to keep Misha's unexpected prediction in mind. That same evening, I asked my Mom to put a visible mark on our kitchen doorpost, exactly at where the top of my head ended. That way, I would always be able to estimate my growth, and I could also look out for my first 'growth spurt', whatever that would be.

From now on, once a month, my Mom measured my new length, while I stood upright against our doorpost and she marked the top of my head by using my picture book. Very much to both her and my delight, the new mark always turned out to be a tiny bit higher, thus showing that I really had been growing up at least some! Yet, I still was and stayed the 'tiniest runt' in our group of infants. Now and then, I stared at all those slowly advancing marks, and secretly hoped I would keep on growing until I was at least as tall as my Dad was. Only, when would I finally have my first 'growth spurt', as Misha once predicted? I just couldn't wait to grow up and proudly show it to all my friends...

Again, our warm summer turned into fall, and then fall turned into another icy cold winter that forced us to wear our nicely warming but also rather heavy winter outfits. Yet, as soon as the first snowflakes started whirling down, all my 'infant friends' and I started to cheer loudly! Soon, more and more snowflakes were whirling down and creating another thick blanket of blinding white snow. Happily, all my friends and I started to roll around and around in the steadily growing blanket of snow, until all of us were looking like little snowmen. Again, we started to fight each other and created several ferocious snowball fights. That is, until we felt too tired to go on and just slumped down in the thick blanket of snow, waiting until it was time to go home, eat dinner, and finally 'hit the sack'.

That winter, on March the third, I celebrated my THIRD birthday, this time with THREE burning candles on my tasty birthday cake that my Grandma had baked specially for me. Again, all my big and small friends who adored me, visited our caravan and happily congratulated me with being THREE years old. Unfortunately, this year, nobody bought me any birthday presents.

Now, I only had to wait for one more year, until I would be four years old and hopefully finally become 'totally dry' and therefore a 'minor'! Then, I would finally be allowed to join our older group of 'minors' into our woods, to set my own traps and catch my own animals to roast them over our campfire. I had already been extremely early in my bodily development by becoming 'dry' during the day while I had been only two years old. Therefore, I hoped and prayed that I would be extremely early again in becoming 'totally dry', although, according to my wise Dad, most infants were becoming totally dry after they were at least five or six years old. In the meantime, I would just have to be more patient again. Grrrrr...

A few months later, my Dad and Mom had to visit another Gypsy community, where they had to perform some Royal duties as our Beloved Gypsy King and his Queen. As usual, they asked Michail to look after me while they had to be away. Of course, I was very happy to have my Big Friend around for the whole day! Only, very much to my disappointment, Michail also brought his new missus, Felicia, to accompany him. Looking bored, she just slumped down on our couch, very close to my Big Friend who now also was her husband, and immediately started to suck up all of his attention. Why did she do that? Could she be afraid that her spouse would again pay too much attention to ME? If so, she really was still jealous of me!

Feeling neglected and also a little bit jealous, I climbed onto Michail's lap from the other side and tried to catch some more attention. Fortunately, my Big Friend didn't seem to mind at all, just started to romp with me as usual, and also patiently answered all my burning questions, like 'how come the sun shows up every day and disappears again every night'. Now and then, I peeked at Felicia's belly, while my bright brain started to feel more and more curious. By using both my Inner Eyes and my inherited Shaman abilities, I could clearly see two tiny boys in her belly that were cozily floating around in their shared womb! Therefore, I was now certain that Felicia was pregnant, but why did she carry TWO babies in her belly? Vaguely, I remembered how crammed my Mom's womb had been with only me in it. Wouldn't Felicia's womb, with TWO baby boys in it, be way too crowded for both of them? In our secluded Gypsy camp, nobody else had twins, and nobody had ever told me they existed.

At last, I started to feel too curious and therefore suddenly blurted out:

"Felicia, why do you carry TWO babies in your stomach?"

As if I had slapped her into her suddenly blushing face, or perhaps I had asked her a too impolite question, an uneasy silence fell over our living room, so that my bright brain started to doubt. Could my Inner Eyes be wrong, or had I really asked Felicia such an extremely impolite question? Yet, I could still see the same two tiny fetuses that were brotherly floating around in her womb...

Suddenly, Felicia jumped up from our couch and glared at me as if she saw a dangerous green alien from another planet. For a few seconds, she still tried to calm down and respond to my clearly improper question, while her contorted face grew redder and redder with rage. Then, she shouted, whilst staring at me with fire-shooting eyes:

"How do YOU know that I'm pregnant? Even Michail doesn't know yet, because I wasn't sure and didn't want to tell him the news until I would be certain. You REALLY are a little freak! And why do you want me to carry TWO children? I don't want to have twins! One little crybaby will be more than enough, thank you very much."

At hearing Felicia's sudden outburst, I felt severely shocked and nearly started to cry. Had I really asked her such a terrible thing? When I stealthily looked at her belly again, I was still sure she was carrying two babies in her womb, and both of them were boys. Within a couple of months, my Big Friend and his missus would be the proud parents of TWO healthy children! Only, why didn't Felicia look much happier? Didn't she like little babies? That would be truly sad.

Then, my Inner Eyes saw a dark cloud along Felicia's timeline that surrounded her but not her two babies. Both boys would be born in excellent health, but something terrible was going to happen to their mother, and both little babies would have to grow up without a Mom! Suddenly feeling horrible, I plainly refused to see any more nasty 'predictions' and angrily shut all my 'inherited Shaman gifts' down. I didn't even answer Michail's worried questions, but only buried my face into his broad chest and started to sob uncontrollably. Having to bear with those extremely powerful 'Cosmic Shaman abilities' was not always fun, as I once had thought in my youthful naivety...

After only eight months of pregnancy, Felicia gave birth to two baby boys. Although they were twins, they didn't resemble each other at all. The first-born baby, Michi, was a bit taller than his shorter twin brother, Movi, who was slightly chubbier. Unfortunately, their mother started to bleed after labor, and it didn't stop. This time, even our competent Wise Woman couldn't help her. In a tremendous hurry, Michail rushed his bleeding missus to a gadjo hospital in a nearby town, where Felicia died before those gadjo doctors could help her.

Fortunately, for all of us, Felicia didn't die in our camp, because our Gypsy belief forbade us to live in the same place where one of us died. Therefore, we would have had to leave our secluded camp and move on to some other place. That is why all Gypsies were living in mobile caravans, always ready to move on if ever necessary.

After Michail returned home, he was inconsolable! Blaming himself for Felicia's death, he cried and cried all the time. Day after day, he visited our caravan, but the only things he did was sit on our couch, stare into empty space, and sniffle. Many times, my parents tried to talk to my Big Friend, but, up to now, all their efforts had been in vain. Of course, I too had tried to talk to him, but, this time, my Big Friend didn't even see me! Yet, I too desperately wanted to pull him out of his grief and make him start caring for his newborn sons. I was sure both little boys missed their Daddy terribly and that they needed him at least as much as I always needed my own Dad. Only, how would I ever be able to help my Big Friend out of his misery?

After some heavy thinking, I finally decided to do something more drastic, to pull my Big Friend out of his stupor. Therefore, I secretly balled my fists, suddenly stormed towards my again sniffling Big Friend, and forcefully punched his stomach whilst using all the power that my small but still relatively strong arms could bring forth! Not surprisingly, Michail suddenly flinched, coughed, gasped for breath, and then stared at me with very surprised eyes...

Now that I finally had his undivided attention, I told my Big Friend, whilst trying to use my sternest deep baritone voice:

"Michail, please go get your sons and start being their Daddy! I am sure your sons need you and that they already miss you terribly. Now that their mother is dead, you are the only person in the world they still have. Please, take up your responsibilities and start being the Daddy they need. Of course, it is okay to feel sad, but don't punish your sons for what they cannot help. Now, stop moping, stand up, find out where your sons are, and GO GET THEM!"

For quite some time, Michail only stared at my heated face and blazing eyes, obviously feeling bewildered. Then, finally, some life returned into his eyes, while he heaved a deep sigh of frustration. Suddenly, he stretched his arms out as if he wanted to grab me! For a second, I was afraid that my Big Friend would be mad at me for punching him, and tell me to leave him alone... Then, he pulled me onto his lap, folded his enormous arms around my tiny frame, and started to cry his heart out!

However, this time, his desperate crying sounded different from what he had done so far. It was now clear that my Big Friend no longer pitied himself. After crying his heart out, my Big Friend unfolded his strong arms from around my crushed ribs. He kissed my wrinkling nose, lifted me off his lap, sat me down onto my Dad's lap, and took a couple of tissues from our table. Then, he left our caravan and just trotted away, without saying a word.

For quite some time, my parents stared at me with very surprised faces, although I also saw lots of love and adoration in their proud looking eyes. Clearly, they thought I had done exactly the right things, although I was still in doubt. Hadn't I been too harsh to my Big Friend, now that he had lost his wife and therefore also became a widower? Finally, my still very proud looking Dad exclaimed:

"My so precious and lovable son, today, you have PROVEN to be a real Royal Gypsy Prince! Both your Mom and I are VERY proud of you, because you are the only one who knew exactly what to do, to help your Big Friend Michail out of his sad stupor. My precious son, thank you very, very much, for being the loving and caring Very Old Soul that you truly are and hopefully always will be..."

Exactly at that same moment, Michail returned into our caravan, on his way ducking his head to be able to pass our too low doorpost. Still looking ashamed, but this time also proud, he stepped into our living room. This time, he also carried his two baby sons in his arms, of course carefully wrapped up in two colorful blankets. Without saying a word, he just laid both babies down in between my old pile of brightly colored pillows. Then, he smiled at me, with a look of regret but also with a lot more pride in his still teary but fortunately again beaming eyes that now radiated Pure Love. At last, he slumped down on our couch and pulled me onto his lap, probably to show me that he felt truly thankful for my unexpected help.

My motherly looking Mom immediately doted over both babies and started to change their diapers. Next, she cooked some milky baby food and fed both babies with it; until they were filled to the brim, burped, and spilled at least half of their food onto our couch. Chuckling inwardly, I thought that, from now on, I wasn't the fastest puking kid in our community anymore, as Misha once teased me with!

After my Mom put both boys back in between my old pile of pillows, I tried to play with them, but they were still too small to have any real fun with. Clearly, I still had to be more patient, as always...

Again, summer turned into fall, and fall turned into another icy cold winter. This time, my parents and I celebrated my FOURTH birthday! For many months, I had looked forward to being FOUR years old; because I had hoped that my growing body would finally stop wetting my bed at night and become 'totally dry'. Then, I would finally be allowed to join our minors into our surrounding woods and catch my own small animals. I also still hadn't seen my first 'growth spurt', as Misha once predicted, although my Mom had measured my slowly increasing length every month.

When I was still a toddler, my Dad once told me that most Gypsy children became 'dry' during the day at being around four years old, and they didn't need their diapers anymore and became 'totally dry' at being around five or six years old. Well, at only two years old, my body had already been extremely early by becoming dry during the day. Therefore, I hoped it would be extremely early again. Then, our strict camp rules would finally allow me to join our 'minors' into our surrounding woods, to set my own traps and catch my own small animals, to roast them over our campfire just like they always did.

Today, my Grandma had decorated her specially baked birthday cake with FOUR burning candles, and, this time, I knew exactly what my 'secret birthday wish' would be. After all my visitors had congratulated me, and our violin players showed up to play their beautiful Gypsy melodies, I blew my four candles and closed my eyes, while everybody around me cheered and clapped. Secretly, I wished that I soon would be completely dry, during both day and night! Now, I only had to wait, as usual. Would my 'secret birthday wish' come true? Or, was such a so-called 'birthday wish' only superstitious nonsense that was found out by our grownups to mislead their easy believing kids like me? Only time would tell...

Alas. Within a few months after celebrating my fourth birthday, I had to admit that month after month had passed by, and I still needed to wear a diaper during the night. Obviously, wishing such a secret 'birthday wish' had really been only superstitious nonsense, as I already suspected it would be. From now on, every year, I would just blow my birthday candles without wishing any more 'secret wishes' ever again. From now on, I was no longer such a silly 'believer'!

Morning after morning, I woke up being soaking wet and feeling betrayed by my still too immature little body. Why couldn't my tiny frame magically grow up a lot faster, as my extremely bright brain already seemed to do? I was growing TIRED of all that waiting, while none of my birthday wishes ever happened. Of course, I was also still waiting until I would have my first real 'growth spurt' and grow a lot taller. Compared to other infants of around the same age, I still was and stayed our 'tiniest runt', although my bright brainiac brain was extremely mature, and my low and sonorous sounding baritone voice sounded even more grownup than some really old grownups were...