I am only a little Gypsy 1 - Reincarnation, does it exist? - 16. Chapter 16. Feeling depressed; but finding tasty spices.

As month after month passed by and still nothing happened, I started to feel a little bit depressed. I also started to hate living in this too small body that still plainly refused to do what I wanted it to do. Couldn't I cocoon myself, just like my little caterpillar friend had done, to pop up when I would be old enough to stay 'dry' all day and night? I still desperately wanted to join our minors into our woods, to set my own traps and catch my own edible animals. Unfortunately, our strict Gypsy rules forbade me to join our minors into our woods, until I would be a 'real big boy' and stayed 'totally dry'. Of course, I had already asked my Dad, my Mom, and even my Big Friend Michail about growing up faster. However, they only told me to wait and be more patient. My time would surely come... Grrrrrr!

Every morning, first thing after I woke up, I rubbed the nightly sand out of my eyes. Then, I shucked my acidly smelling wet diaper, took a warm shower, and wolfed my Mom's healthy breakfast down. After dressing, I trotted outside and hastily sat down on my wooden bench. From there, I always stared longingly at our already queuing group of minors who left our camp and disappeared into our woods, to set traps and catch small animals to roast them over our campfire. Now and then, our minors also brought home lots of tasty summer fruits and edible nuts, to divide them among our infants and toddlers who still had to stay at home in our secluded camp.

Every time after our group of minors disappeared into our woods, I felt more and more depressed. Sometimes, I started to mope about such a misfortune of being still too little. When would it finally be MY turn to enter our woods and have fun setting my own traps and catching my own small animals to roast them over our campfire? Couldn't I magically grown up during the night and become 'dry' earlier? I was starting to feel TIRED of all that waiting in vain...

Near the end of the day, when our minors returned from our woods and brought home several animals and sometimes also some edible nuts and tasty fruits, I always joined them and listened to their interesting stories about what they had been doing during the day. However, next to listening to them, I also desperately wanted to SEE what they had been doing, with my OWN eyes! After our minors had divided the nuts and fruits among us; they started to skin and clean their caught animals in our small butchery near our parking lot.

After our minors had cleaned out the animal carcasses, they first smeared the meat with a little bit of salt and some squashed yellow plant leaves they were calling 'spice'. Then, they started to roast their prepared animals on wooden stakes over our brightly stoked campfire. Day after day, I joined them and listened to their interesting stories, while they were preparing and roasting their caught animals. For example, they told me about chasing a small pig through the woods, or catching a fat rat, which always caused lots of laughter, because nobody in our camp ever wanted to eat a rat, mainly because wild rats could infect us with several unknown diseases.

Next to listening to their stories, I sometimes started to dream about joining them into our surrounding woods and setting my own traps. I so wanted to be one of them, and to 'spice' my own roasting animals with their yellow leaves and a little bit of salt... Unfortunately, they didn't even let me help them, because our strict rules forbade me to help them until I had set my own trap and caught my first edible animal. But, I couldn't set my own trap and catch my first animal because I wasn't allowed yet to join them into our surrounding woods. And, I wasn't allowed yet to join them into our woods because my 'infant' body still needed to wear a diaper at night... Grrrrrrrrrrrrr!

This morning, after all our minors had disappeared again into our surrounding woods, I slumped down on my wooden bench and then almost burst out into tears. Still feeling small, depressed, and truly sad, I hastily wiped the already upcoming tears out of my eyes. What would the others think of me? Again, I rose from my wooden bench, sauntered around our faintly glowing campfire, visited Michail's caravan and his tiny baby boys, and badgered a couple of grownups with my 'impossible' questions. Until, at last, even our grownups told me to leave them alone and to go pester my infant friends.

Reluctantly, I left our grownups and went to my already playing 'infant friends'. Only, today, I just didn't feel like joining their usual games of hide and seek anymore. All of a sudden, those little infants seemed to be too small to be my real friends! Although I had been joining them nearly every day whilst playing our usual games; today, they seemed to act too 'childish' to have any real fun with. Obviously, my steadily developing brainiac brain was already becoming too old for them, or perhaps my inside was really becoming too precocious for my own good.

Although my tiny body was only four years and a few months old, my inside felt already a lot older and also a lot wiser. I knew that my bright brainiac brain was developing extremely fast, but why didn't my still too immature infant body follow my brain? Couldn't there be some 'magic way' to force my still way too small infant body to grow up faster, perhaps overnight, or by cocooning myself as a metamorphosing caterpillar? Would our Wise Woman or my Big Friend Michail know such a 'magic way' to make me grow up faster and stay dry all day and night? Quickly, I returned to Michail, to ask him my burning question.

However, my Big Friend only started to laugh at seeing my depressed face, while he told me:

"My dear Prince, please be happy to be still such a young boy, and try to enjoy your early youth in our secluded camp for as long as you can. Way too soon, you will be an old man like me, and then you will regret all your missed youthful chances..."

"But, I WANT to be like you! I HATE being this little, and I just cannot wait to grow up and join our minors into our surrounding woods! I also want to enjoy my early youth NOW, by setting my own traps and roasting my own edible animals over our campfire..."

"Well, I think that your extremely bright brain is already a tad too intelligent for your own good. Ultimately, you are still only four years and a few months old. Yet, I can talk to you as if you are already a grownup, and you can already understand everything that I am telling you, sometimes even outwitting me with your clever brainiac answers. This is not a common behavior for a child your age, because most only four-year-old kids are still sucking on their thumbs, or playing with mud and small pebbles. Therefore, please, try to stay the happy young child that you are, for as long as you can!"

Still feeling more and more frustrated, depressed, and now also angry, I left my Big Friend's caravan. Outside, I first trotted to our big tree and started to kick and pummel it. For quite some time, I raged and muttered, as if trying to kick all of my anger and frustration into the big tree, until I finally started to feel better and thanked the tree for helping me get rid of my too childish anger. A few 'infant friends' started to chuckle at seeing my kicking and hearing my muttering, but they wisely held their mouths shut and kept some safe distance from me, because they knew from their own experiences how caustic I could be when my inside was too angry or too frustrated.

Of course, my Big Friend had only tried to help me, and he had been absolutely right with everything, but that didn't make my waiting any easier. Ultimately, I didn't even WANT to be such an intelligent 'brainiac'! Secretly, my inside wanted to be just like any other four-year-old kid and feel happy with my 'early youth', as my Big Friend Michail had advised I should do for as long as I could. Apart from that, I was sure that being more 'normal' would make my young life quite a lot easier! I only didn't know how to change my too clever way of thinking. Still feeling depressed, I strolled into our surrounding bushes, this time without looking for any caterpillars. They would only remind me of our 'minors' who were now looking for animals in our surrounding woods. Sitting down on my old stump, I put my head in my hands and started to think.

Yesterday, I had asked one of our oldest minors, Misha, about the squashed yellow plant leaves they always smeared onto their roasting animals, next to using a little bit of salt and some oil to make the meat sticky. Misha had first patiently answered all my questions, and then he had explained that the yellow plant they always used to spice their meat, was called an 'herb' and they used only its tasty yellow leaves. Then, Misha added a couple of very interesting facts! His friends and he were sure there had to be several more useful 'herbs' among our abundantly blossoming vegetation, but none of them knew how to recognize them or how to use them on their daily food. Only our Wise Woman knew everything about those unknown 'herbs', because she always gathered all her 'healing herbs' from our surrounding woods or dense forests. Then, she could use them for example to cure illnesses; or to smear them onto nasty animal stitches or inflamed wounds.

Totally unexpectedly, I understood what I had done instinctively, after a nasty insect stung me and I had smeared some brownish juice onto its painful swelling! Without any knowledge of what I had been doing, instinctively, I had clearly 'healed' myself, by using the squashed leaves of what I now understood had to be a 'healing herb'! Was I also turning into a 'Healer'; next to already being a 'powerful Shaman' and a 'Cosmic Mage', and once having been a 'little trapper boy' during one of my past lives? Or, was I really becoming our next 'Wise Boy', to recite the words my wise Dad sometimes used to tease me? Again, only time would tell, as usual...

Near the end of the day, I returned to my own bench and sat down. From here, I always waited until our minors showed up and started to prepare their caught animals. Very much to my happiness, this time, after they had spiced and roasted their caught animals, Misha turned towards me and totally unexpectedly offered me a small chunk of his own roasted marmot! Of course, Misha knew already how eagerly I wanted to join him and his friends into their surrounding woods, to catch and roast my own animals. Perhaps, as a much older boy, he even pitied me.

Feeling grateful, I savored my tasty chunk of roasted marmot meat, while the others smiled at me indulgently. Fortunately, all the others seemed to like their eager little Crown Prince very much, so that they didn't protest and just allowed me to accept Misha's unexpected gift. Therefore, I just smiled back at them, because I liked them too! After also thanking my new friend Misha for his unexpected generosity, I trotted to our own caravan, to wash my hands and eat dinner with my already waiting parents.

The next morning, immediately after our minors disappeared into our surrounding woods, I first went to my 'infant friends' and told them I wanted to be left alone. Then, I sauntered towards the bushes where I knew Misha's yellow 'spice herbs' were growing. After some searching, I found them. Feeling curious, I plucked one of the tiny yellow leaves, squashed it, and tasted some of its yellowish juice on my tongue. Yes, this yellow 'spice' tasted like the flavor from Misha's roasted marmot. Only, in its pure form, its taste was too strong and pungent to be pleasing. Of course, I had to smear some of the yellow juice onto a chunk of roasting meat first, together with a little bit of salt and a few drops of oil to make it sticky.

Totally unexpectedly, my inside REMEMBERED this particular yellow 'spice', because I had been using it many times before, during my past life as a little trapper boy! Immediately, my surprised inside had another vivid recollection of helping my 'trapper Dad' spice our chunks of fresh deer meat, before roasting or preserving them over our brightly glowing campfire. From a very young age, I had already been scouring our dangerous mountains, outstretched woods, and wildly foaming rapids, to collect many different types of spicy herbs to use them on our daily food. As a little trapper boy, I always knew exactly which herb would be poisonous or make me ill, by taking the herb into my hands and 'sensing' its energy. My 'trapper Dad' knew that I had such a 'special gift', so that he always relied blindly on my infallible 'sixth sense' of knowing which particular herbs we could use to spice our roasting dear meat to make it even tastier.

Feeling surprised, I first shook my head a few times, to get rid of my unexpected memories from a 'past life'. Then, I started to be very curious. Had I really been such a 'little trapper boy' in one of my past lives, always helping my 'trapper Dad' collect our tasty herbs and spices? Last year, I had already 'felt' the energy of all the different plants around me, while I could 'sense' whether they were poisonous or harmful. Could my gifts from my past trapper life still be working; perhaps as a heritage from really having been such a 'little trapper boy'?

Enthusiastically, I restarted to 'feel' and 'sense' all the different plants and flowers around me, to put their information away for later use. Next, I also tried to 'talk' to all the foreign plants and flowers that my inside did not remember. Very much to my delight, many tasty and nice scenting herbs really talked back to me, and some of them even told me on which particular food they could be used best! Again, the dangerous or poisonous herbs made me feel nervous or queasy, so that I discarded them immediately. Clearly, and very much to my happiness, all my former 'trapper abilities' were still working!

Feeling more and more enthusiastic, I selected a couple of useful herbs that I was sure would spice Misha's roasted marmots much better than his usual 'yellow spice leaves' had been doing. Only, what should I do now? Could I take those newly found 'spices' towards our minors and ask them to use them on their roasting animals? Or would I have to tell them first about my discoveries? Well, let's tell Misha about my discoveries first; and from there play it by ear...

Near the end of the day, I left our surrounding bushes and returned to my usual bench, to wait there for our minors to show up and start roasting their caught animals. Would Misha again offer me a small chunk of his own roasted marmot? Perhaps, after I told him first about my newly discovered tasty herbs, he would even let me help him roast it. Or, would my older friend be too wary about using any possibly 'dangerous' herbs and therefore refuse to try out my newly discovered spices? Our grownups always told us kids to play it safe in the first place, and I knew that our Wise Woman had warned our minors not to experiment with any unknown herbs or mushrooms, because they could be dangerous... Well, let's wait and see. Apart from that, I certainly had some truly interesting information to tell!

Finally, our minors showed up from our surrounding woods, again carrying several fat marmots and other edible critters. Now, I started to feel a bit nervous. How should I tell Misha I had found many other tasty herbs and spices in our surrounding bushes, next to the usual yellow 'spice' leaves he always used? Feeling unsure, I decided to wait until Misha again offered me a small chunk of his own roasted animal. Would Misha really want to listen to what the 'smallest runt' in our camp had to tell him? Impatiently, I waited.

Indeed, after Misha had spiced and roasted his own fat marmot, he looked at me, chuckled at seeing my eager face, and again offered me a small chunk of roasted meat that was flavored with his yellow spice leaves. Feeling thankful, I started to devour Misha's roasted chunk of marmot. Only, now that I tasted it, I also remembered all those other nice tasting 'spices' that I had found in our surrounding bushes. Therefore, I was now a lot more particular about the rather bland taste of Misha's marmot. I was sure that, as a little trapper boy during my past life, our own chunks of roasted deer meat had tasted MUCH better! How should I tell Misha about my recent discoveries, to make him try out my newly found spicy herbs?

Tentatively, I first wiped some smear from my face, before I hesitatingly asked:

"Misha? Although your roasted marmot tastes good, I am sure it could taste even better. Next time, you might add some of those red flowers from near the border of our surrounding bushes. You may also add a few tiny bluish leaves, but not too many, to enhance its flavor even more. If you wish, starting tomorrow, I will help you by bringing even more tasty spicy herbs to you..."

Looking a bit surprised, Misha responded:

"How come you are suddenly talking about using spicy herbs? For as far as I know, you've never roasted any marmot or any other edible animal yourself. Did our Wise Woman tell you about using those tiny bluish leaves or any other tasty herbs?"

"No, our Wise Woman has nothing to do with my spicy herbs. But, after yesterday when you told me about many other useful herbs and spices, this morning, I went into our surrounding bushes to search for them. Soon, I found lots of really tasty herbs that can be used to spice both your roasting animals and our daily food. Shall I bring a few of those really good tasting herbs to you, perhaps tomorrow, so that you can try them out on your next roasting marmot?"

Suddenly looking VERY wary, Misha asked me:

"WHAT did you do this morning? Don't you know that experimenting with unknown herbs can be very dangerous? Many good tasting herbs are in fact deadly poisonous, and, if you aren't extremely cautious with them, they could make you very ill or even kill you!"

Sensing that I probably could win my plea, I decided to be totally honest with my older friend, and therefore explained:

"To be honest, from one of my past lives as a 'little trapper boy', I seem to have inherited many useful 'sixth senses' that always let me know in advance when an unknown herb is dangerous or poisonous. Besides, I have already tasted all those newly found herbs and spices, and, as you can see for yourself, I am still alive and kicking! Clearly, I have already proven on my own body that all my newly found spicy herbs and tasty plants are good for me and absolutely harmless!"

Already looking less wary than before, Misha told me:

"Yeah, well... When my Dad was still alive, he sometimes told me a few things about himself, for example about remembering his own 'past lives' and probably inheriting a few useful abilities from them. He even thought I could have inherited my own abilities from my own past lives. Therefore, I am willing to believe you. Perhaps, I am even going to try out some of your newly found tasty herbs. That is, after our Wise Woman has tested them first. But, if the result tastes yucky, you will have to eat the spoiled animal all by yourself!"

Now sensing that I was really winning my plea, I responded:

"That is okay with me, but only if I can use my own herbs on your caught animals and also roast them all by myself."

Suddenly looking a bit sour, Misha answered:

"Unfortunately, our strict rules forbid any too young kids to help roasting our mammals, unless they have caught their own first animal. Therefore, I am afraid you will still have to be more patient..."

"Then, let me join you tomorrow morning, to set my own trap and catch my own animal! I know already how to fold a proper snare from a piece of metal strand, and also how to set up a nearly invisible trap, because you've already shown me how to do it properly."

"Well, to be honest, I myself would really love to let you join us tomorrow morning, but unfortunately you will still have to wait until you are staying totally dry during both day and night. And, of course, your parents have to allow you to join us into our surrounding woods as well, as you are still too young to be a real 'minor'..."