Jacob Finding His Way - 3. Chapter 3

The second week of school went by quickly. Before we knew it, it was Friday already. Nothing big happened, not like Monday. I am worried, kind of like the calm before the storm.

Joey and I agreed not to breathe a word of what happen on Monday to his parents. He didn’t want to worry them at all. But somehow Fran found out on Thursday, and told their parents about it.

To say Joey’s parents were angry is an understatement. They were totally pissed. First, we didn’t tell them what had happened, and again, and with the same guys. Second, the school once again didn’t do a thing. Right away Joey’s mother called the principal, but was told he couldn’t do a thing about it. They were too late on reporting the problem. Finally, it was the same guys. Joey’s parents can’t understand why they have so much hatred in them, against their son, who never did a thing to them.

It’s going to be a while before the dust settles on this one, and we knew we were stuck hearing about it for long time. But it is Friday, and we are going to forget about the last week. I had a crap load of homework. I love math, but not enough that it takes hours away from my evenings.

I was in my room, when I heard a knock on the front door. I got up, went to answer it. I was surprised to see it was Joey there. “Hey, what’s up man?” Joey said by way of greeting

“Not much, I’m just surprised to see you my friend!” I said throwing a warm smile.

“Yeah, my mom let me out to hang out with you. She trusts you even more now than before, due to what happened on Monday.” Joey explained.

“Well heck, I guess something good came out of being told on, don’t you think?” We both laughed.

“That is true, that is true! What do you want to do?”

“Sorry, come on in my friend. Let introduce you to my mother.”

My mother was sitting on the couch in the living room watching television.

“Mom, this is my friend from school Joey, Joey this is my mom.”

“It’s nice to meet you Joey.” My mom said.

“It’s nice to meet you as well ma’am.”

We headed to my room, closed my books, and we sat there trying to figure what we were going to do. We decided to go outside and sit and talk. We headed out, and sat on the stairs.

Before we knew it, we were joined by my sister and Joey’s sister Fran. We just talked, and then Jason and Jeff joined us. It was getting dark, but we just kept chatting. Then, the door next store opened, the young man walked out.

He was dressed the same as the first time I saw him; all in black, including his high top converse shoes; jeans tight as heck, and black eye shadow on his eyes, and the rings, skulls. He headed over towards us, and introduced himself.

“What’s up guys, my name is David!” He extended his hand, and we all shook it, still stunned with what we saw.

Jason was the first one to speak up. “So what David, are you a devil worshiper, or something? I am not trying to be rude.”

“It’s not rude, and yeah, I am a devil worshiper,”

We all just looked at each other, like ‘what?’ I heard about it in the movies, and I thought it was only in the movies. So I asked him; “I didn’t think it was here. We are not that big of a city. Where in the world would you worship at?”

“We have plenty of areas we can worship. We do it in the desert, or the big storm drains, we even I had a rundown church at one time.”

We all just looked at him. Then Fran spoke up; “There’s no way you had a actual church to worship the devil in!”

“We did, it was a rundown abandoned church on the east side of town. We took it over, and just began holding our rituals in it. We did it at night and we were kind of loud, and the church was in a residential area, of the east side of town. The neighbors around the church were getting very tired of us. They warned us a couple of times, but we didn’t pay them much mind. They were afraid for their kids than anything else. They started to feel it was not safe to let them play in the neighborhood. They even called the cops on us a couple of times, but we weren’t breaking any laws, so the cops couldn’t do a thing.

Well one night, the neighbors got together, went over to the church, and burned it to the ground. When we got there, the fire department was there, but they were not doing a thing. They said, it was burning really bad, it was better and safer to just let it burn to the ground. One of the neighbors came up to us, and whispered: “You didn’t want to leave, so now you have no choice.”

That sucked and they had no right to do that. None of them got in trouble with the law, and we lost our place to worship.”

“To tell you the truth, I would have done the same thing as they did, if you guys moved into a church in my neighborhood.” Jeff stated.

David just looked at Jeff, with daggers in his eyes. I tried to lighten the mood.

“Better watch out Jeff, David will put a spell on you. You might wake up one morning and find you have no hair or teeth!” I said in a joking manner.

We all started laughing except David. He looked at me, not with the same look that he was looking at Jeff with, just a stunned look. He then finally spoke.

“We are not witches and don’t do spells. We just worship something different!”

“Sorry for the misunderstanding.” I stated.

David then leaned against the wall, breathed in, and then looked at us, and asked.

“Have any of you heard of bloody mary, and if so, have any of you done it?”

We all looked at each other and most said ‘no’. David then went on.

“Well, right before I came out here, I did it.”

I interrupted him, “No way you did it. What I heard of it and even if it is true, anyone that does do it, never walks away from it” I said in disbelief.

“That tells you how you know about it. First, it’s a devils tool. Second, I am walking proof of it working, not once, but many times” David retorted.

Fran then interrupted David, “If you are telling the truth, then what actually happens when you do it? Instead of death, what, you go through the mirror, and you are able to go into any house that has a mirror since you’re are a devil worshiper and all?”

“Silly girl you are, very silly. It’s not like that all!” David responded.

“Then how is it? And don’t call me a silly girl!” Fran was pretty upset being called a silly girl.

“I didn’t mean for you to take offense to it, and again, it doesn’t work that way! Before I came out here, I went into my bathroom, shut and locked the door. Turned on the hot water, then, turned off the light. I put my hand under the hot water, then while splashing it on the mirror, I said ‘bloody mary’, then again, and then one last time.

At first nothing happened, then the mirror lit up, white and grey fog appeared in the mirror, and then it started to clear up, a reflection appeared in the mirror. It was me but not me. It was like hundred years from now, maybe I was dead, I really don’t know. All I know the reflection in the mirror was me but really old. I was wrinkly, my skin sunk into my bones of my face, my eyes were blood red, my hair was all white, the clothes I was wearing, were torn, but not by a person, but by age. I then waved my hand in front of my face a couple of times, and then I stopped it in the mirror. It was, as well, old and wrinkly and sunk into my bones. My nails were very long and yellow. Then the reflection was gone, the fog went, and it was dark once again!”

We looked at each, more with looks of disbelief than anything else. All I wanted was the creepy guy to go away. We didn’t invite him, so why did he come? For him to talk about this crap just made it even worse.

David looked at us, “Just what I see in your faces, your unbelievers. That’s fine; one day, it will be true. The devil will overcome his bonds, and walk among us again!”

David turned and walked off to his apartment. He didn’t use his front door, he opened the window to his room, I think, and just jumped in, and closed the window. We stood there very quiet, weirded-out more than anything else, and finally Jason broke the silence; “Talk about a guy with his head stuck up his ass, he is one.” We all laughed.

“Just think how much brainwashing or just plain stupidity it takes to start thinking, believing and talking that way.” I said.

Everyone shook their heads, and started to laugh. Jason continued; “Well since we are talking about scary crap, by no choice of our own, let me tell you all a story! As you all know Jeff and I graduated from Austin High, the school you Jacob and Joey are going to. As you can see, the school, from the outside, looks like a church.

Back in the day, the school was a church and a private school. Our city started to grow, so the district bought the school and made it into the high school for this side of town. It was cheaper and all. Anyways, back in the beginning, just like now, the jocks ruled the campus. A freshman wanted to join the football team, so they hazed him. They told him to go to the top of the bell tower, and ring the bell. The freshman thought it was weird, that’s all they wanted him to do, so he agreed.

He went up to the third floor, right in the middle of the school on third floor is the music room, and he had to enter into the room in order for him to get to the bell tower stairs. So he went in, and to the left of the stage, he saw the door. He went over, opened the door, and went up the winding staircase. Finally he reached the top, couldn’t see out since there’s no windows at all. He reached out, couldn’t find the rope. Reached out even more, still couldn’t find the rope. So he reached for his lighter, lit it up, and he saw the rope. So he leaned over a little. Hearing the chants from the senior football players below, were calling; “we don’t hear anything Steven!” As he reached out for the rope, the wooden beam gave way, and he fell four stories down to his death.

The guys outside heard Steven screaming all the way down. They didn’t even go in to see if he was fine, they just ran out of there, like scared little girls. They say, to this day, he haunts Austin high, and goes after jocks.”

I kind of giggled at that, I heard Joey laughing as well.

Jason looked over to us, “The story wasn’t supposed to be funny, it was to scare you since you both just started there!”

“No we are not laughing at your story, it is something else, kind of a inside joke between me and Joey!” Thinking, well hoping, the story was true, and Steven would haunt the hell out of Brian and the others that beat up Joey. At that point Jeff spoke up.

“Come on man Jason, you got the story wrong, it wasn’t like that.”

“Yes it was, at least it was told to me that way” Jason retorted.

“Well, the part of Steven, the bell tower, and the jocks, that is correct, but you forgot a part of the story” Jeff said authoritatively.

We all looked at Jeff, with puzzled looks on our face then he continued;

“Look that kid Steven, all that part is true, but shortly after he died, it was said, Steven started to haunt just one room at first. He history class, mainly his teacher. The teacher gave him a very hard time in class while he was alive, it was said, Steven took his revenge out by haunting the teacher.

The teacher was known to stay late after class, and be there early in the morning, for detention and all. He loved giving detention to his students, I gauss he had no life and all. Anyway, for days Steven would be in the class, moving things in the air, spooking the heck out of the teacher.

Finally one evening, Steven appeared to the teacher, freaking the living shit out of the teacher. He went screaming into the principal’s office, yelling Steven was haunting him and all. Of course the principal didn’t believe him, and sent him out of the office. Steven kept doing it, even during class, but only the teacher was able to see him.

Well, a few days later, the students arrived to class in the morning, and door was still locked. They knocked on the door, and there was no answer. Of course, in every class, there’s a student that must be perfect, and in this class, no exceptions. Well, this student went and grabbed the principal to unlock the door.

As the principal unlocked the door, and held the door open, the students started to make their way in. All of the sudden, the traffic of students stopped, and the principal was yelling to continue to go in. But, no one moved at all. So the principal got through the crowd of students, looked up, and dropped his keys to the ground.

Right in the middle of the room was the teacher, he’d hung himself. And it is said, Austin High has two ghosts that walk the halls; Steven and the history teacher.”

We just stayed quiet, and to tell you the truth, it was starting to freak me out. You could see, we were all thinking. Then, Jason stood up screaming out; “Boo, we got you!”

Joey, Fran, my sister, and I jumped screaming. Both Jason and Jeff started laughing, and were making their way back to their apartment. “Catch you all later, don’t have any bad dreams!” they taunted.

He scared the crap out of me, Joey, Fran and my sister. We stood up, and walked inside our apartment. We stood in the living room for a few minutes, then Fran spoke up; “What do you say Joey and I stay here for the night so it doesn’t end early or on a scary note.”

“I don’t think mom and dad will let me stay over!” Joey responded.

“Why not? You’re here with Jacob, and it seems to me, our parents really love Jacob. Plus, I will be here too. Let me call them and see.”

I stopped Fran, “Let me check with my mother first.”

I walked down the hallway, and saw the light under my mother’s bedroom door was still on. I knocked, and then entered. My mom was already in bed, but not asleep yet.

“Mom, can Joey and Fran stay the night if they get permission?”

She looked up at me, and said “Yes, just keep it down. I had a hard day at work!”

“Thanks mom, good night, love you, see you in the morning!”

I headed back to the living room, looked at Fran; “She said yes, now it’s up to you to get permission from your parents.”

“Cool, Joey and I will head home and ask. I think it would be better to ask in person than over the phone. Plus we need to get a change of clothes and sleep wear. Be right back!”

Joey and Fran headed out the door, Fran sounding positive it was a done deal but I really didn’t think it was due to Joey’s parents being so protective of him. If they do give them permission, what a night it will be! Not sex let me remind you, but to be with and around the guy I have fallen heads over heels for. I was excited to say the least.

It took maybe fifteen minutes, and we heard a knock on the door. I went over, answered it, and there was Joey and Fran, with bags in their hands.

“Come on in! To tell you the truth, I am surprised to see you guys got permission to stay over!” I said.

“You’re telling me! When we got home, Fran went right up to our parents and asked. Once they heard it was here, and we both were staying, they said yes!” Joey exuded.

I patted Joey on the back, and let them in. Fran and my sister headed over to my sisters room, and Joey and I headed to mine. My brother Andy wasn’t here, and we had no idea where he was. All that I know, he wasn’t coming home tonight, so Joey and I have the room to ourselves. We’ve got to be quiet, because my room was across the hall from my mother’s room.

Joey looked around, and dropped a bag in front of the television and then the other bag in the corner of the room.

“I brought the Sega Saturn with me. I thought we could play Street Fighter. We must beat the computer!” Joey spoke up.

“Good idea my friend, let me plug it up, and we can get started.”

We didn’t have a newest television; in fact this television was bought for my brother and me by my grandpa. It’s not old, but it isn’t new but it does the job. I hooked up the game system, then the controls. Handed the controls to Joey, and put the game in.

Joey and I lay on the bed facing the television on our stomachs, side by side. I really liked the feeling of Joey being close to me like this. His body heat, when he turned to talk to me, his warm breath, just him being there felt so good.

“Are you ready Jake to kick some computer butt?”

“Hell yeah, let’s do this!”

We started to play, and quickly moved through the levels. We were having so much fun, didn’t realize how much time had passed. It was almost one in the morning when we looked at the clock. We stopped the game and we will pick it up in the morning I figured.

I could still hear the girls next door, giggling and talking. Joey and I tried to hear what they were talking about, but the little we got, it was about boys. We just turned to each other, and started to talk.

“Jake, you could tell me it’s none of my business, but I was wondering, have you got a boyfriend.?”

“No I don’t. To tell you the truth, I am so scared of being gay, I won’t act on it. People misunderstanding about gay people, makes them stupid.”

“You’re telling me! I don’t have a boyfriend either. Have you ever had a boyfriend in closet?”

“No not even that. I don’t want to get to happy, and find that all my happiness gets taken away from me.” I explained.

“I see where you are coming from. If you were ever asked, would you go out with another guy, of course in the closet?”

“To tell you the truth, I haven’t given it much thought. I suppose I would, just we would have to be very careful and all. In the private of our rooms, we could cuddle, kiss, and all, but outside, we would have to act as just friends. The only reason for that is, there are so many stupid people out there, that either they do not understand about homosexuality, or are scared of it thinking it can be passed on, or just plain old hatred against us, they would do anything to make our lives difficult.”

“Certainly understand that. It is very true.”

“Don’t get me wrong Joey, I wish we all could walk in the open freely, without the worry of getting beaten up, or worse, killed, for being who we are. We just don’t live in a world like that so we are forced to stay in the closet, if we desire to live a good life.”

“Why do you suppose it’s like this? Why can’t we be who are, without that fear?” Joey asked.

“To be honest, I really do not know. I suppose, when people see or think about gay people, what comes to their minds are those that are in the open and all girly like, just so fragile, even worse than any girl.

Don’t get me wrong, Joey, I am not cutting us down in anyway. I believe we don’t choose who we love and what sex we love. We are born that way. At the same time, if you are born a man, act as one, or born a woman, act as one. Who cares what happens behind closed doors? That’s between you and your partner, no one else. But in public, act as you are, a guy or a girl” I said concluding my explanation of my philosophy.

“So you don’t even believe on kissing in public?” Joey inquired.

“Joey, please you got me wrong. Yes kiss in public, if you are in a place that you won’t be killed or beaten up for showing your affections. Just don’t act all fairy is what I am saying. I believe that is what gives us a bad rep. Everybody thinks we all act like that, which we don’t. And because that’s what they see and think, it kind of gives us that bad rep” I clarified.

“I understand, and agree with that. We just live at a time when we are still hated just because they don’t understand us!” Joey said in agreement.

“That’s it right there. That’s all I am trying to say.”

“Jake, would you ever go out with someone like me?” Joey ventured.

I looked at Joey, he had a look of worry in his eyes. I really don’t know why he should be worried about anything we say or talk about.

“Joey, I don’t know if anyone outside of your family has ever told you this. I think you are very cute, just a very handsome person. From your head to your toes, I just like everything I have seen so far. The smile you have, is so warm, it could melt ice, which, by the way, you should smile more. I love your laugh, and don’t even get me started on your body. I just love every part of you.

If we stay just friends, I know I will be missing out. And whoever is the lucky man that gets your heart, should cherish it everyday of their lives. Simply put, you’re a gift, a gift anyone of us would die for!”

At that point, I looked up at Joey, and I saw tears rolling down his face. I didn’t say that to make him cry, I meant what I said. I leaned over to him and hugged him. It scared me just doing this. As I was hugging him, I tried to make him feel better:

“Joey, I didn’t mean to make you cry. I’m just starting to care a lot about you. I just said what I was feeling” I explained.

Joey broke the hug, and we started looking at each other. I did something that even surprised me. I rubbed his face, wiping the tears from his cheek and face. Then, cradling his face, looking down at him I said; “Joey, I am falling for you, in a bad way. I know we have only known each other for two weeks, but I am. I never believed that saying, love at first sight, but when I saw you for the first time outside in front of your apartment, I fell for you right then and there.”

Joey lifted his face to mine, and our lips touched for the first time. We both were trembling and fumbling around then we just relaxed and just kissed. I opened my mouth, letting Joey’s tongue come in and I felt I was in heaven. I know, I say this a lot, but I was. Walking on clouds, I felt like my heart was going to jump out of my chest, it was pumping so hard. The kiss was moist, it was new, so we at first didn’t know which way each of us should turn our heads, or who first should put there tongue in who’s mouth, or even when we should breath or not. But to tell the truth, it was our first kiss and it was the best. No matter how nervous we were, I knew right there and then, he is the one I want. The kiss lasted, it seemed to me, a long time. We kept kissing one another and embracing each other as if there was no one else in this world.

The kiss was broken, more so that we had to come up for air than anything else. Joey turned his back to my stomach, grabbed for my arm, pulled my arm around him. He scooted over to my stomach, and we both just laid there cuddling.

This is what I dreamed about, what I wanted. I was in heaven, and wanted to stay there the rest of my life. I didn’t want to lose this moment. I wanted to keep feeling him breathe, to hear him breathe, to feel the heat of his body. I wanted to crawl inside of Joey, and stay there.

We both fell to sleep. Around three, I opened my eyes, and realized Joey was still in the bed with me, and we were in the same position we were when we went to sleep. I really didn’t want to wake him, but I knew I had to.

I gently shook Joey, his eyes fluttered open, looked up at me, with a question look on his face. I leaned over to him, and kissed him on his forehead, then his lips.

“I truly don’t want to move from this spot, but I surely don’t want my mother, sister, or Fran walking in and seeing us like this.”

Joey shook his head, and started to move off the bed. I felt empty without him. Why can’t I just be me, and not give a shit what others think? But I know I can’t, and it has to be this way,

Joey pulled off his t-shirt, and I just loved his body. He was cut and you could see the beginnings of a six pack forming. I wondered if he worked out. He then pulled down his pants, and removed them. He stood there in just white shocks and grey boxer briefs on. He was so damn hot I popped a boner right then and there.

Joey walked over to my brother’s bed, and got into it. I got up, stripped down to my boxers and socks, walked over and got down on my knees; “Joey, I know it is too soon, but I do really love you. I will do anything for you. I will protect you from the ugliness of this world. I will do everything in my power to ensure you never hurt again.”

Then I leaned in, and kissed him on his lips, he opened his mouth, and we kissed even longer then the first time. I got up, turned off the light, and went to bed. Before I dozed I off, I heard Joey in a soft voice say; “Jake I love you too. I want to be with you, I have never been this happy, or felt this safe before. Thank you for telling me what’s in your heart.”

We both fell asleep. About five or so, I felt someone getting into my bed. I turned my head and saw Joey climbing in. He was placing his finger over his lips.

“Your brother just came in, and kicked me out of his bed. He looks very drunk or something!”

Joey whispered in my ear, as he settled in. I looked over to my brother’s bed, and there he was, passed out on top of his blankets. He didn’t even get his clothes off. Snoring really loud, so I knew he was out for the count.

I switched places with Joey, and wrapped my arms around him, covered us up where no one could see. I moved up close to him feeling the flesh of his body for the first time, and how good it felt. I cradled him, and we fell to sleep again, together, all cuddled up like one.

When I woke up the next morning, it was almost ten. I didn’t find Joey by my side, I thought him climbing into bed with me was a dream, I looked over at my brothers bed, and it was empty. Then I heard noise coming from the ground between our beds, I looked down, and there was Joey, sound asleep.

He was so cute, very handsome with a blank expression on his face, like he was dreaming. It doesn’t look like he shaves yet; neither do I. His lips, just right, little fluffy, but not big nor small, and when he smiles, he gets these cute dimples form on each side. I looked further down to his chest, a little lighter than the rest of his body. He wasn’t fat at all, muscles starting to form. The rest of his body was covered up with a sheet.

I wondered where my bother went off to? Did he see me and Joey in the same bed? Did he wake Joey up and force him to sleep on the ground? Who knows, I will find out, as soon as Joey wakes up.

At that point, I got up from my bed, and went to Joey’s side. Went down onto my side, and just laid there, staring at Joey. I moved his hair from one side to the other, then back again. Then I saw the scar where the rock must have hit his head. Man was it big, and it still looked fresh. I removed my hand quickly.

I leaned down to Joey’s lips, and kissed him, within moments Joey started returning the kiss. Looking down at his face, his eyes opened, and just looked up at me. We kept kissing for a few more minutes, just coming up for breath every once in awhile. Then, I broke off the kiss, and asked:

“Good morning! Why are you on the floor?” I asked.

“I woke up around eight, and saw your brother asleep still. I figured I didn’t want him to catch us in the same bed, so I got down here and fell asleep on the floor. Sorry, I grabbed a blanket off of your bed.”

“Don’t be sorry for that. I got worried when I woke up, and you weren’t in bed. I should have been the one sleeping on the floor, not you. Always visitors are comfortable, not the other way around!” I said.

“Not a problem, I just wanted make sure no one found out, and ruin this, before it even gets started!” Joey said with a totally captivating grin.

Joey then leaned in and we started kissing again. We stopped when we heard a knock on the door. I got up quickly, and jumped on my brother’s bed. The door opened and there was my sister and Fran.

“What’s up guys? Did you guys sleep at all last night?” Fran asked.

“Yep, we hit the hay around three or so.” I stated.

“Well, mom asked me to get your lazy butts out of bed, and get ready for breakfast!”

“Yes sis, we are on our way!”

My sister and Fran left, shutting the door. Joey jumped up, and went over to his bag in the corner. He put on a pair of shorts, t-shirt, changed out his white socks and he put on a pair of running shoes. I did the same, only difference, I had blue shorts on, and Joey had grey. Other than that, we looked like twins.

We got to the kitchen, sat down to eat. My brother wasn’t at the kitchen table, and I still was wondering where in the world he was.

“Where is Andy this morning? I know I saw him get in last night, but woke up, and he wasn’t around!” I asked mom.

“Jacob, he left with a group of guys this morning, and I have no idea where he went” mom replied with an exasperated tone.

The look of anger on her face told me to drop the subject. I returned to eating, and rest of breakfast was quiet. When I got up, started to collect the plates and head to the kitchen, Joey followed me with the other dishes, and placed them in the sink. He got beside me, and started to rinse off the dishes I already washed.

“Joey, you are a visitor here at our home, go and relax in the living room or my room. You don’t have to do dishes!” I said.

“I know I don’t, I just want to, that’s all” Joey replied with such a loving tone in his voice.

So we washed and rinsed the dishes. As I was passing the dishes to Joey to rinse, our hands brushed against each other. We were so close together, due to the sink being small, our hips touched.

We finished up the dishes, cleaned the table, stove, and counters, and then headed back to my room. Turned on the television and the Sega Saturn, and started to play where we left off at last night. We laid on my bed, side by side, on our stomachs, and played, laughed, and had fun.

There were no thoughts of sex and I wasn’t nervous about anything. All I wanted was to be with Joey, and have fun. Simply being with him, made my day. As we passed another level, there was another knock on the door, and Fran walked in. We looked at her, paused the game, and she spoke up:

“Joey, we have to go now before mom and dad get worried. Pack up your things, and I will meet you in the living room.”

She left, shutting the door, I looked over at Joey, and I got really sad, really fast. I knew at one point, he would have to go home, I just wish it wasn’t this fast. He got up, turned off the game, unplugged it, and packed it up. He grabbed both of his bags and placed them by the door.

By this time, I was already up, and trying to help him. He turned to me at the door, before opening it; “Jacob I loved being with you last night. I had a lot of fun. I hope you did too. Maybe next weekend we can do it again” Joey said with a sad smile that had hope behind it.

“I loved being with you Joey, and spending the night with you. I hope we can spend more time together yet this weekend.”

“We will, and more so now since my parents like you a lot. I will see if I can come over later this afternoon. If not, we will hang tomorrow all day.”

“Sounds good to my Joey!” I replied.

He leaned over, and we kissed again, but this time, it was a goodbye kiss, and I hated that. We broke the kiss, Joey opened the door, and headed down the hall way, to the living room, I was following. Once we made it in the living room, Fran and my sister were standing at the front door. Joey walked over to his sister and I went over, shook Fran’s hand, and knocked fist with Joey. They headed home, and I headed back to my room.

I wasn’t happy, but I knew he would need to go home sooner or later. So I sat down on my bed and watched television. Nothing was on, so I headed outside.

As I got to the stairs, Jason was coming down. He was dressed as he always was. I wondered how many pants he had of the same color, and why did he only wear that color. Only he knows. Jason looked at me:

“Hey Jacob the man, what are you up to?”

“Nothing much! How about you, Jason?” I replied.

“Same ole, same ole, that’s all. Hey I was wondering if you wanted to hang tonight, like we did the other night? Jeff is gone again, and we’d be there alone watching movies.”

“No Jason, thanks for asking. I better stick near the house tonight. Plus, I am drowning with a lot of homework.”

“That’s cool, just wondering. How about tomorrow we go and play some b-ball?”

“Sure, lets plan on that. Is it ok if I invite another friend? I doubt he will come, but I will ask.”

“That’s fine. Tomorrow then, it’s a date!” Jason said in conclusion.

“It’s a date then” In confirmed.

We hit fist, and Jason took off. Although Joey and I aren’t really going out yet, but we did start something truly good last night, and I didn’t want to ruin it. The thing with Jason last weekend was a one-time thing, and now I wish I never did it. I can’t take it back, but Joey is the one I want, so I am going to be true to him.

I was sitting and watching television, the day went by fast, but couldn’t keep my mind on the show. All that was on my mind was Joey. I just couldn’t shake that I have fallen so bad so quickly for him. Then the phone rang, I got up to answer it, and it was Chase.

“Hey buddy, what’s up man?” I asked.

“Not much here! Just figured to give you a call and see what you were up to.”

“Just here watching television, that’s all! And you?”

“The same. Well not really Jacob. I was trying to get my algebra home work done, and I am so confused about it. So I was wondering if you could help me. Have you done it yet?”

“Yeah, I have, let me get to my room, and help you out.”

“Cool man, you don’t know how much this will help me out. I am bad in math, and I see you’re good at it.”

As I was heading to my room, there was a knock at the front door.

“Chase, give me a second. Someone is knocking on my door. Let me get that real quickly, I will be right back.” I said.

“That’s fine, take your time.”

I placed the phone on the end table, headed to the door, and opened it. My spirits just got better, it was Joey!

“Hey Joey, what’s up?” I asked with a huge grin on my face.

Patting him on the back, as he came in, I really wanted to kiss him again, but didn’t know if it was a good idea or not.

“Nothing much, just came down to hang” Joey said with joy in his voice.

“That is cool! Hey, I have Chase on the phone. He needs help on our algebra homework. I will walk him through it quickly, and then we could do whatever you want.”

“Take your time Jake, take your time!”

Joey’s smile was just awesome, it melts ice. He looked hot, but then again, when doesn’t he? And I think he even looks hot when he sleeps. I grabbed the phone, and we headed to my bedroom. As I closed the door to my room, Joey leaned in, and we kissed. I loved kissing him so much. It is like air to me; I cant live without his kisses any more.

Got back on the phone, “Hey Chase are you still there?”

“Yeah! Are you ready?”

“Give me a sec, let me get my book and my homework out, where I can help you. Let’s see, ok this is how to solve the problems….”

I walked Chase through assignment, and he seemed pleased with the way I was showing him how to solve and do the math. Every so often, I looked at Joey, winked at him, or squeezed his leg, or rubbed his chest, I just wanted to be with Joey that’s all. By the time we finished the last equation, Chase had it down without a problem.

“Jacob, I can’t explain it. When you tell me how to do the math, I understand it, but when the dufus teacher does, I am so damn confused! You should teach the class and maybe more of us would pass.” He laughed.

“That’s true. The way the teacher explains it, it kind of puts us all to sleep. But I have always understood numbers, so I gauss that’s why I can do the work.”

“Whatever the reason is, thank you! You were a big help. Do you want to do something tomorrow?’

“I have plans already for tomorrow. Do you play basketball by any chance?” I asked.

“Yeah I do, I’m not very good at it, but I do.”

“Join the club, I’m not good at it either. But my neighbor keeps asking me to play and I finally said yes for tomorrow. Knowing my neighbor, he will probably be partying all night, then won’t have the strength or will power to play tomorrow. Let me see, and I will call you up tomorrow.”

“That’s fine; I will wait for your call then. Catch you tomorrow Jacob.”

“Catch you on the flip side my friend, have a good evening, goodbye.”

I hung up the phone, laid it down, and went up behind Joey, and put my hands around him. He felt so good, and smelled good, couldn’t place the fragrance, but I really don’t wear cologne myself. I just loved Joey, and holding him like that, bringing him into my body and just standing there with him is all I want. I put my head on his shoulder to rest, and looked at him. Leaned down and kissed him, then put my head back on his shoulder.

“I am sorry it took so long, I was trying to get off the phone quickly. Are you ok?”

“I am fine, don’t worry about it. You were on the phone before I got here.”

I turned Joey around to face me, I saw a look of fear in his eyes, and it scared me. What was Joey so scared about?

“Joey I know we really haven’t known each other that long, but I can look and figure out expressions on faces. What is wrong?”

“Nothing really Jake; just the guy upstairs, I am kind of jealous of him. He is older, and he is cute, and you are going to play basketball with him. I really don’t know….”

Joey trailed off, with a look of hurt in his face.

“Oh Joey, you have nothing to worry about. I only like you, you are all I want. Is Jason cute? Yeah, but he’s last week’s cold pizza compared to you. I wasn’t going to play basketball with him unless you went. I even told him that, I wanted you to go, and he said yes. All I want to do is be with you as much as I can. Don’t you EVER worry about any other guy getting my attention or my affection. I will NEVER wander. Joey, that is a solemn promise I freely make to you.” I said with total conviction.

Joey started to tear up. I grabbed him, and hugged him. I wanted Joey to never fear anyone again; to never get hurt again, and that’s why I will be true to him. I did what I did with Jason, but that was before me and Joey opened up to one another, now since in have a chance with the guy I truly want, I will never betray him. Joey pulled away.

“Jake, thank you, and I know we haven’t really agreed on what we are, so I really don’t have the right asking or saying what I did. This is still very new and uncharted waters for both of us. I know that, but I also know my feelings for you and can’t bear the thought of loosing you.” Joey said bearing his soul.

“Joey, don’t you worry about that. You’re right, we haven’t said or defined what we are yet, and I won’t rush you into it. I just want a chance, that’s all” I explained.

“Can I ask you what you think we should do?” Joey asked.

“Joey, we are both new at this, plus we are terrified of people finding out about us. We don’t want any problems, and we agree on most, if not all of what a relationship should be, if it is to be. I want to be boyfriends with you, but I will leave it in your court, you decide if and when. Ok?” I said laying my feelings out on the table.

“Ok Jake, please just give me time, I am just scared, that’s all. Does that mean though we can’t kiss anymore?”

I laughed; “No, we can kiss as much as we can. I love kissing you.”

I leaned forward and we kissed, and hugged one another. Man I really want Joey, I am falling to fast and to hard for him, and what if he decides he doesn’t want me? I don’t think I could stand the heartbreak. Why in the hell did I let my heart fall in love so quickly and so hard? I’d better brace myself just in case Joey doesn’t want more than a friendship with me.

We sat down in front of the television and watched movies the rest of the night. Around eleven thirty, Joey was getting tried, so I called it a night. We got up, and headed out. I walked Joey to his house, we didn’t kiss any more, we bumped fist, and he walked upstairs to his apartment, and went in. I headed home, with my head swirling, confused really bad and all I wanted to do is go to sleep. I fear Joey is going to come to a conclusion that he doesn’t want to be anything more than a friends, and I will have to live with that.

Sunday morning came quicker than I wanted. I didn’t sleep well at all, but dragged myself out of bed. My brother was in his bed asleep. I went to the bathroom and washed up, and got ready for the day. I really didn’t care how I looked, I felt as if a load of bricks fell on my head.

Am I reading too much into what Joey said? Is it just as simple that Joey wants time, and that’s all? Or he just doesn’t know how to tell me all he wants right now is a good friend? I came to a conclusion right there and then, I will just let the cards play out, and however it goes, I will be ready for all conclusions to this situation.

Around eleven, there was a knock on the door, I went to answer and it was Jason. I walked outside, and he started to speak; “I cant play basketball today, my parents got into town this morning.”

“It’s cool man, I understand, maybe another time then?” I responded casually.

“Yeah, I just feel bad that we had plans, and you finally said yes, and now I have to cancel our plans.”

“Don’t worry, Jason, there are plenty of other weekends to play. Things happen!”

He shook his head, we tapped fist, and he headed up to his apartment. I kind of was thankful for this, not to sound mean, but Joey never said he wanted to go or not, and I didn’t want to press the issue with him. I wasn’t going to go, if Joey didn’t go. So it was a good thing that Jason had to cancel; it saved me headaches.

I looked up into the sky, and it was a gloomy day. The weather reflected how I feel. I went in, and watched television for lack of anything better to do. I heard a knock at my bedroom door, and it opened, it was Joey. Ok, the sun just came out, at least in my mood!

“Hey Jake, how is going?”

“Fine Joey, how about you?”

“I am doing good, just wanted to come down and see what was going on. Are you still going to play basketball with Jason and Chase?”

Oh man I forgot about Chase, I need to call him at least and tell him the plans have changed, and see what else he would like to do.

“No, Jason cancelled, his parents got home this morning, so he had to stay around the house today with his parents” I explained to Joey.

“Oh, ok! So what are you going to do now?”

At that point I realized I haven’t asked Joey in or anything.

“Joey, come on in, sit down and make yourself at home. Please close the door.”

“Thanks! So what are you going to do today?”

“I really don’t know. You reminded me about Chase, so I know I need to call him and let him know the game is off!”

“Why don’t we play basketball here?”

“There’s no court. We would have to go down the street to the middle school to play, and I don’t think your parents will let you go, nor mind for that matter.”

“That’s true, they wont. So what then? We should be able to figure out what to do.”

“I don’t know; let’s see if Chase and his little brother could come down, and see if Fran and my sister want to play a game of baseball. We probably could get some other neighborhood kids to play as well.”

“Sounds good, let’s do it” Joey agreed.

I called up Chase, and he said yes right away and his brother can come too. They will be down as soon as they can. Then we asked our sisters, and they agreed. We waited for Chase and his brother to get here, about fifteen minutes later, there was the knock on the front door. We opened it, and there was Chase.

We all headed outside, said our greetings, and grabbed our bats and baseball gloves, and headed to the park. There were several kids already there playing around. We asked them if they wanted to play, and they said yes, and headed to get their gloves. Those that didn’t have any, we had some spare ones, and we could share.

As we waited for the others to return, we just talked. I looked over at Joey and saw he wasn’t really into what we were talking about. He was in his own little world, thinking about something else. I got up, sat next to Joey. I nudged him and he came out of his trance. He looked over at me and smiled, I smiled back. I winked at him, and reached over and squeezed his hand. The others were facing away from us, so of course they didn’t see. I squeezed his hand one more time, he smiled again, and we got up as we saw the others heading over.

We split into teams, trying to make it even. To tell you the truth, I can’t play baseball either. I am not a sports kind of guy. I watch it on the television, I just can’t play it. Anyway, I tried to make sure Joey and I were both on the same team, but it didn’t happen that way. The only good that came out of him being on the other team, is I can watch him on the field all game long. The only problem is keeping my hard on down!

My team won the coin toss, so we batted first. Chase was on my team, so he went up first. Hit the ball, and ran the bases.

“Told you all, you have nothing on me, better luck next time!” Chase taunted the others as he rounded the bases.

Fran was next, and first to strike out. I was next. I got to home plate, made out of a crushed coke can, as the rest of the bases were. I stood there waiting for my first pitch. Swung, and missed, second pitch, swung, and missed again. I was beating myself up on it, but why? I knew I didn’t play good. Then came the third pitch and I got the ball at the tip of my bat. I ran to first, then slid into second. Joey was playing second base.

“Hey Jake, this cool, thanks for thinking this up” Joey said.

“Yeah it is, isn’t it? I am not good at playing sports, but the point of this, is to just have fun!”

“That’s true, that is true.”

Chase’s brother was the next one up to bat, and he hit the ball on the second pitch which brought both of us home. My sister was next, and gave us our second out, then Chase was up again, popped it up, and it was caught for our third out.

We traded places and gloves and headed out to the field. We decided that I would try out pitching, so I went to the mound. The first pitch was hit, and thanks to my sister, of all people, and she caught it. Then I was able to strike out the next one. Then came Joey, my first couple of pitches, he missed, then my third, I made it easy, which wasn’t hard for me, and he got a hold of it, and rounded the bases. As he did, I watched him smiling as he glanced at me, and winked.

We got our third out, and headed back in. Fran came up to bat, and once again, three and out. It was my turn, got a piece of the ball, and made it to second base. I won’t say I tried to run fast; I wanted to stay on second base.

“Jake, can I ask you something?”

“Go right ahead Joey, ask anything!”

“Never mind, not here; let’s talk after the game, when Chase and his brother head home.”

“You got it; whenever you want.”

At that point, I had to head out of there. Chase’s brother once again, brought me home. The game was fun, and I guess we didn’t split the teams evenly as we thought we did. My team won pretty easily. We had to call it quits because it was getting late, plus Chase and his brother had to get home. We said our goodbyes, knocked fist, and they were gone. Fran and my sister went their way, and the kids that joined the game went back to doing their thing.

Joey and I headed to the laundry room of my building to talk. I wanted to see what Joey wanted to tell me, so to say I was nervous, is an understatement.

“Joey, what did you want to talk about out there? What’s on your mind?”

“Really nothing much; I guess, I want to clear the air on what we spoke about yesterday. I didn’t want you to think something that it isn’t!”

“Ok, just tell me. I told you, the decision is always yours. You have been through a lot more then I have.”

“Jake, I truly don’t want to hurt you, I don’t. I want to be with someone that isn’t afraid to be seen with me in public.”

“Whoa ! Wait Joey, you misunderstood me! I never said I didn’t want to be seen with you in public. Those words never came out of my mouth.”

“Yes they did, Jacob. You said, ‘only in the privacy of our rooms, nowhere else’.”

“Yes and no. I stated that we should not show affection in public, like holding hands, kissing, or hanging on each other, things like that. That is what gets us beaten up every time. People think it’s gross and not human. They can’t understand we are in love. I will go to the mall with you, the movies, the stores, games, or where ever else you want to go, just our affection must be kept between the two of us in the privacy of our rooms.”

“Oh, I did misunderstand you. Do you think you would ever be ready to show affection in public?”

“If society changes, and we don’t have to fear for our lives in one way or another, I can. But the way it stands now, no.”

“Wow, I didn’t think all this through Jake. I do want to be with you, and I am falling for you, I just don’t want to hide our love.”

“Do you think I do? Hell no, I don’t! I really don’t! I just don’t want to see what happened to you last summer happen again, to either of us. I love you too much, to see you hurting. You are becoming my world, and I want to protect you from this world.”

“I understand where you coming from. I just want to go out and scream out how much I love you Jake, I do.”

“Joey, you are so damn cute, you know that? We will build a relationship of love and caring, that we won’t need to scream it out to the world. As long as I know I have your heart, and you have mine, that’s all it takes, and all I want. I love you Joey, I truly do. And I really want to go out with you. Will you give me a chance?

Joey just sat looking at me, mouth open, just staring. I got closer to him; “Joey, you’re a very handsome guy and any guy would trip over himself to get you. I am not a good looking person, I think of myself as average. But I would try to give you what you want, and first of all, I give you my heart.”

“Jake, of course I will go out with you. Don’t ever let me hear you say anything bad about yourself again. You’re everything I want in a person, from looks all the way into your soul.”

I then wrapped my arms around Joey, and brought him to me. I started to tear up, couldn’t believe Joey said yes, he wants to go out with me. My heart was pumping really fast, I was trembling, but I was so happy. I got the man I fell in love with at first sight. I will treat him like gold, and never let him down.

TO BE CONTINUED !

 

I have a home page for you to see what the characters look like or what the places look like. If you want to walk in their shoes, please go to: http://jacobmillertex.com/

{Hi Everyone! I just finished up my third installment of the story, and I hope you are enjoying the read. I am enjoying writing the story of what I went through. It is bringing back very good memories. I have been getting very encouraging feedback on the story so far. I will post one chapter per week, but if I get busy, please understand. If you want me to notify you with an email when I post the next chapter, let me know, and I will add you to the e-mail list, and send out a general email when I post. I will be sure to privatize the list so that your e-mail address is not visible to others. So I hope you liked it and keep reading the future installments. It is based on my life in high school, just the names were changed, but the location is pretty much the same. Remember, this story is more about finding true love, more than anything else. Keep reading the future chapters, and enjoy, please e-mail me and let me know how I am doing at jacobmillertex@aol.com, Thanks!}

EDITOR’S CORNER:

 

Greetings Loyal Readers !
Well, it seems our boys are finally getting around to putting their feelings on the table for each other. Back in the time when this story takes place and considering the location, it is nothing short of a miracle that the boys found each other and were able to communicate their feelings. If you are younger than 35, you can’t imagine how it was when homosexuality was never even whispered about! I am so glad to be living in a time when we can find a way and place to live our true lives.

There are still many, MANY that live in areas where being gay is still vilified. There are still sad cases where parents and family turn their back on a young gay person. We all know of the religious organizations that rail against “the gay lifestyle” as though it is a choice.

Be open to those that might be suffering from the injustices still existing in our society. You can make a difference!

Until next time, be well and safe !

“Daddy” Rick