Jump to content
  • entries
    6
  • comments
    115
  • views
    2,431

Adding “And then the murders began” to your story opening

MacGreg

Entry posted by MacGreg

2,774 views

 Share

I saw this floating around social media today and thought it would be a humorous exercise for GA authors to participate in.

 

http://www.boredpanda.com/and-murders-began-first-line-book/?page_numb=1

 

"The opening line of a book is extremely important, as it has to be intriguing and powerful enough to capture the reader's imagination. Then, the second line has to intensify the intrigue. Coming up with these lines can be pretty difficult, yet one writer came up with a second line that would almost always heighten the intrigue to its peak, and the Internet is going crazy. "And then the murders began" - that's the clever line Marc Laidlaw came up with. Add it to almost any opening line and you've got yourself a hell of an intriguing book opening."

 

So here's the exercise for you: In the comments, write the first sentence of one of your GA stories or poems, followed by the second line of "And then the murders began."

 

I'll start with my own contribution, from 'Backstage Tryst':

 

"I rubbed nervous palms across my denim-covered thighs, trying once more to exhale the breath which remained stuck in my throat, unable to escape. And then the murders began."

 

I look forward to seeing yours!

 

index.jpg

  • Like 7
 Share

27 Comments

Recommended Comments



  • Popular Comment
Mikiesboy

Mikiesboy 143,946

Posted

  • Popular Comment

From: me Zombie: 

 

Stephen looked down at his left arm. And then the murders began.

  • Like 6
  • Popular Comment
MacGreg

MacGreg 39,552

Posted

  • Popular Comment
6 minutes ago, Mikiesboy said:

From: me Zombie: 

 

Stephen looked down at his left arm. And then the murders began.

 

That makes for an ominous beginning, all right. ;-)

  • Like 6
  • Popular Comment
Headstall

Headstall 306,859

Posted

  • Popular Comment

From Morningstar:

Kellar wiped steamy fog off the bathroom mirror, but the moisture from the shower replaced it almost immediately. And then the murders began.

 

From Finding Refuge:

Wiley hit the ground with a heavy thud, pain that felt like fire waking him from his exhausted stupor seconds before his head exploded. And then the murders began.

 

From Treading Water:

Craig happened to be facing the side entrance to the backyard while he, along with his Aunt Helen, tended to burgers and hot dogs on the gas barbecue. And then the murders began.

 

LOL... This was fun, Mac :) 

  • Like 6
  • Site Administrator
  • Popular Comment
Valkyrie

Valkyrie 110,450

Posted

  • Site Administrator
  • Popular Comment

From Penguin:

 

The man walking toward me had a cat on his shoulder.  And then the murders began.  

  • Like 6
  • Popular Comment
Headstall

Headstall 306,859

Posted

  • Popular Comment
26 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

From Penguin:

 

The man walking toward me had a cat on his shoulder.  And then the murders began.  

LOL... this really is fun...

  • Like 6
  • Popular Comment
Drew Espinosa

Drew Espinosa 144,947

Posted (edited)

  • Popular Comment

From Day and Night:

 

Going to Adam’s, I’ll be back by 9. Love you. 

And then the murders began.

 

From my 2017 Spring Anthology-unfinished (a brief preview):

 

A man sat at his desk, looking at nothing in particular- lost in thought. And then the murders began.

Edited by Drew Espinosa
  • Like 6
  • Popular Comment
northie

northie 21,036

Posted

  • Popular Comment

Here's mine. From the start of my entry for the upcoming anthology, The bard's tale.

 

In a bohemian, but run-down house well outside of the castle walls, a bard sits at a table. Then the murders began.

  • Like 6
MacGreg

MacGreg 39,552

Posted

13 hours ago, Headstall said:

From Morningstar:

Kellar wiped steamy fog off the bathroom mirror, but the moisture from the shower replaced it almost immediately. And then the murders began.

 

From Finding Refuge:

Wiley hit the ground with a heavy thud, pain that felt like fire waking him from his exhausted stupor seconds before his head exploded. And then the murders began.

 

From Treading Water:

Craig happened to be facing the side entrance to the backyard while he, along with his Aunt Helen, tended to burgers and hot dogs on the gas barbecue. And then the murders began.

 

LOL... This was fun, Mac :) 

 

Gary, these are all great. I'm glad you picked several to share. The Morningstar one seems especially fitting; the Treading Water one made me laugh. :lol:

  • Like 4
MacGreg

MacGreg 39,552

Posted

13 hours ago, Valkyrie said:

From Penguin:

 

The man walking toward me had a cat on his shoulder.  And then the murders began.  

 

This one definitely had me laughing! Those cats can be conniving ! :gikkle:

  • Like 4
  • Haha 1
MacGreg

MacGreg 39,552

Posted

12 hours ago, Drew Espinosa said:

From Day and Night:

 

Going to Adam’s, I’ll be back by 9. Love you. 

And then the murders began.

 

From my 2017 Spring Anthology-unfinished (a brief preview):

 

A man sat at his desk, looking at nothing in particular- lost in thought. And then the murders began.

 

"Love you" followed by "And then the murders began" is an awesome beginning to any story. :-) Your Spring Anthology opening is equally awesome. 

  • Like 4
MacGreg

MacGreg 39,552

Posted

7 hours ago, northie said:

Here's mine. From the start of my entry for the upcoming anthology, The bard's tale.

 

In a bohemian, but run-down house well outside of the castle walls, a bard sits at a table. Then the murders began.

 

That seems to fit perfectly in there, northie!

  • Like 5
  • Site Administrator
Valkyrie

Valkyrie 110,450

Posted

  • Site Administrator

This is a lot of fun! lol

 

From Faeries Anonymous:

"Hi, my name is Jonquil--but you can call me Jon--and I am a faery."  And then the murders began.  

 

From Max's Garage:

"I'm very disappointed in you, Conners."  And then the murders began. 

 

From Alex's Legacy:

"Tell me about Alex," Aaron said softly, stroking my hair.  And then the murders began.  

 

Apparently I start a lot of stories with dialogue.  lol

  • Like 5
MacGreg

MacGreg 39,552

Posted

2 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

This is a lot of fun! lol

 

From Faeries Anonymous:

"Hi, my name is Jonquil--but you can call me Jon--and I am a faery."  And then the murders began.  

 

From Max's Garage:

"I'm very disappointed in you, Conners."  And then the murders began. 

 

From Alex's Legacy:

"Tell me about Alex," Aaron said softly, stroking my hair.  And then the murders began.  

 

Apparently I start a lot of stories with dialogue.  lol

 

It's good to start with dialogue. It jumps right into the middle of a scene, and I appreciate that. These are great.

  • Like 4
  • Popular Comment
MacGreg

MacGreg 39,552

Posted

  • Popular Comment

From my poem Cinched In:

 

Intermittently, I catch glimpses of the mile markers on the road,
Reflective signs that denote the distance
To a destination still unknown.

And then the murders begin.

  • Like 6
northie

northie 21,036

Posted

Just thought - this must be one of the shortest ... From my dice prompt The demon and the deep blue sea.

 

"Ahh..."  And then the murders began ...

  • Like 5
MacGreg

MacGreg 39,552

Posted

15 minutes ago, northie said:

Just thought - this must be one of the shortest ... From my dice prompt The demon and the deep blue sea.

 

"Ahh..."  And then the murders began ...

 

Perfection.

  • Like 5
Drew Espinosa

Drew Espinosa 144,947

Posted

26 minutes ago, northie said:

Just thought - this must be one of the shortest ... From my dice prompt The demon and the deep blue sea.

 

"Ahh..."  And then the murders began ...

 :worship: :worship: :worship: 

  • Like 4
  • Popular Comment
Drew Espinosa

Drew Espinosa 144,947

Posted (edited)

  • Popular Comment

I added the second line to a couple of poems, and the results have me giggling, lol.

From Not A Prompt- In Just One Year (commemorating the one year anniversary of Obergefell vs. Hodges decision):

 

In just one year,
A bakery spurned a couple.

And then, the murders began.

 

-the worst nightmare for the religious right. :P 

 

From Poetry Prompt 3 Lyrics

 

Finally, a man in my bed,
Just in his underwear.

And then the murders began...

 

- :blink: Well, that took a turn, lol.

 

PS: I agree with everyone, this has been absolutely fun, Mac! :D 

Edited by Drew Espinosa
  • Like 7
MacGreg

MacGreg 39,552

Posted

1 hour ago, Drew Espinosa said:

I added the second line to a couple of poems, and the results have me giggling, lol.

From Not A Prompt- In Just One Year (commemorating the one year anniversary of Obergefell vs. Hodges decision):

 

In just one year,
A bakery spurned a couple.

And then, the murders began.

 

-the worst nightmare for the religious right. :P 

 

From Poetry Prompt 3 Lyrics

 

Finally, a man in my bed,
Just in his underwear.

And then the murders began...

 

- :blink: Well, that took a turn, lol.

 

PS: I agree with everyone, this has been absolutely fun, Mac! :D 

 

The man in the underwear sounds appealing, but not with the subsequent blood and gore. Unless you were just watching CSI on the TV...? :/

  • Like 5
Drew Espinosa

Drew Espinosa 144,947

Posted

3 minutes ago, MacGreg said:

 

The man in the underwear sounds appealing, but not with the subsequent blood and gore. Unless you were just watching CSI on the TV...? :/

My Lyrics poem is actually pretty light and humorous. Using it for this exercise paints a far darker picture. :evil: lol.

  • Like 5
  • Popular Comment
AC Benus

AC Benus 36,635

Posted

  • Popular Comment

I've been wanting to join in, but found most of my opening lines are too compact to be good for this game. I stumbled on my opening for Part 3 of Hair of the Dog and decided to do it on the third line (the caterpillar example above has it on the third line ;) ) 

 

My post-cum walk on the grass over to the creek – and to Junior – was a nice one. I stepped out of my sneakers, tied the laces together and flung them over my shoulder. The grass licked between my toes and made my cock stir to life again. And then the murders began.

 

————

 

Yeah...? What about doing it for famous opening lines, say, like this one: 

 

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way – in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only. And then the murders began.

 

————

 

Or this one: 

 

Call me Ismael. And then the murders began.

 

————

 

Thanks for posting this, Mac. It's fun! 

 

 

  • Like 6
MacGreg

MacGreg 39,552

Posted

11 hours ago, AC Benus said:

I've been wanting to join in, but found most of my opening lines are too compact to be good for this game. I stumbled on my opening for Part 3 of Hair of the Dog and decided to do it on the third line (the caterpillar example above has it on the third line ;) ) 

 

My post-cum walk on the grass over to the creek – and to Junior – was a nice one. I stepped out of my sneakers, tied the laces together and flung them over my shoulder. The grass licked between my toes and made my cock stir to life again. And then the murders began.

 

 

 

The contribution from your story is the best. A post-cum walk through the grass, followed by murder. I'm hooked. ;)

  • Like 3
sanmariano

sanmariano 215

Posted

From Lost Island ...

 

Brad Cooper gazed out the window at the dark jungle night as a clock somewhere in the old bungalow struck three. And then the murders began.

 

  • Like 5
MacGreg

MacGreg 39,552

Posted

1 minute ago, sanmariano said:

From Lost Island ...

 

Brad Cooper gazed out the window at the dark jungle night as a clock somewhere in the old bungalow struck three. And then the murders began.

 

 

:o

  • Like 4
Cole Matthews

Cole Matthews 14,643

Posted

OMG! I posted this a couple nights ago on Facebook. It's hilarious.  Trouble is, some of my favorite works already involve murders! Awesome. 

  • Like 3

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...