CoTT 2 House of Cards

[dughlas]

On 9/9/2023 at 1:21 PM, Drew Espinosa said:

Get over it, bitch.  

That's good advice, you might consider following it.

[dughlas]

On 9/9/2023 at 2:17 PM, Drew Espinosa said:

I don't need to get over anything.  

How could I hallucinate something, when I got plenty of sleep last night?  

See?  

Perhaps it wasn't an hallucination but rather a dream.

[dughlas]

19 hours ago, Albert1434 said:

But of course after you done eating it return the container with large bills in it!

The soup is free the large bills are to cover the handling and shipping charges ...

[dughlas]

7 hours ago, clochette said:

Need your help for class! 

Do you guys have any exemples of maladjusted children in literature, movies/series/theater/, society...?

So far I've got Forrest Gump, Mowgli, Tarzan, Genie, the ugly ducking and Victor of Aveyron

I suppose Drewdo doesn't count as he's not appeared in any literature other than the DSM-IV.

[Page Scrawler]

21 minutes ago, dughlas said:

Be careful what you reply young one I am in possession of a stout Irish blackthorn shillelagh and I know to use it.

Hey, Dugh and Mum.   Hope you're well.

[Drew Espinosa]

@dughlas stop bullying me, Sexy! 😭

[dughlas]

I know y'all have been waiting, mostly patiently, for kilt tales. It has been a rather odd season so far. While was excellent the first two weekends we sold very kilt. Last week kilt sales improved dramatically. However, the timing of sales was odd. Not only for us but other shops as well. We stood about twiddling our thumbs wishing for a customer, the suddenly the place was packed to the gills for an hour or so. Then everyone disappeared again, a bit later we were all busy some of us, me, helping multiple folks at one time. That doesn't  allow for the more personal attention I am known for. Today was less busy, slowest day of the year. The weather forecast was late day/evening thunderstorms. They arrived just before 3pm. 

Fortunately,  because it was a slow day I had opportunity to do three separate kiltings. Saddly,  none of the lads made a purchase but I told the first two lads we were doing the kilting strictly for the merriment. 

The first lad came in with his lady and another couple. They were all dressed in faire appropriate garb. He was in a white short sleeve pullover and well fitted khaki pants. I say well fitted because he had a very shapely bum. He stood a bit over six foot, had a 32 inch waist and long well formed legs. Have mentioned that a shapely male calf was considered of prime importance during the Elizabethan period. We have the Queen's beloved turtle dove, Robert Dudley, 1st Earl of Leicester for that. But, I digress, Andrew, that was the lad's name acquiesced to becoming a bit of eye candy. Oh, I forgot to mention he was blond, blue eyed and had a charmingly handsome face. Normally he would dress in colors less likely to draw attention. However, since this was strictly for our fun he allowed me to dress him in an eye catching kilt of soft pastels. The base color was a very subdued butter yellow with broad cross lines in turquoise, magenta and soft purple. I know it sounds garish but it's not. We refer to as the Easter egg tartan. When we first introduced it three years ago the master only ordered 25 yards. The majority of those kilts sold within three weeks. We only have this one left because it is a small and it will require a young teen of stout heart to wear it. But again I digress. So in case you do not remember when I do a kilting I typically take the lad to a quiet back corner to dress him. The I call the interested parties to join us. I stand directly behind the lad shielding him from view while the others line up behind him preparing their devices for capturing photo and video memories of the event. The kilt walk begins with me giving soft instructions for lad to walk in his normal gait across the shop. Stopping at the far side of the shop gazing at the varied and sundry this on the other side of our garden. Whilst he is perusing those things we are contemplating his assets ... er, I mean pleats. Now imagine if you might a pair of lovely melons lovingly wrapped in clinging pleats. I rang the bell and cried "KILTING" only to have my cry echoed but my compatriots. Andrew began his walk. Those delighfully muscular hams flexed with each stride causing pleats to swing and sway. When he reached the end of the walk he stood back to us ... we were awestruck. The ladies were sporting ear to ear smiles for the lad was very well hung. He's pleats people his pleats. They draped in loving embrace display his extraordinary fine form. Once we'd had our fill of that view I bid him return to stopping him short about three paces so we could admire the front view. I think I mentioned he had a charming face but really we wanted to see his backside. I bid him turn and stand with his feet spaced shoulder width apart with his fists upon his hips. The stance of a bold Scot. Then I ask him to twist at the waist so he could look his shoulder at us and wink ... that my darlings is the "I'm too sexy for my kilt" pose and yes Andrew was most definitely too sexy for his kilt.

Shall I continue on to the next tale or do need to catch your breath and settle your heart?

Oh, I neglected to tell you the lad was in his mid-20's.

Edited September 10, 2023 by dughlas

[clochette]

1 hour ago, dughlas said:

I suppose Drewdo doesn't count as he's not appeared in any literature other than the DSM-IV.

 I refrained from saying something like that in a side note but it was really on the tip of my tongue - or fingers seeing as we type 

[Page Scrawler]

40 minutes ago, dughlas said:

I know y'all have been waiting, mostly patiently, for kilt tales. It has been a rather odd season so far.

Thank you for the story, Dugh. It was very entertaining to read. 

[dughlas]

More you say. Why am I not surprised.

The next lad, Peter, came in with his lady fair. I know this because her t-shirt stated most cleverly "I My Boyfriend" whilst his, yes, you guessed it, read "I  My Girlfriend". Now normally I find things of this nature near nauseating in treacle sweetness. However, these two were likely all of 20 and innocently charming. That and I used his shirt to my advantage and asked if he'd ever consider trying on a kilt for the lady he loved. Afterall, did she not deserve a bit of eye candy. Of course she was enamored of the idea. I am sometimes evil in my search of entertainment. Since it was all in the way of making merry Peter agreed. Peter too, was an attractive lad. Slender and nicely muscled as is wont for an active lad. Tall, again 6 foot plus with a mop of dark chocolate curls a la Timothee Chalamet and dark brown eyes. Pink blushed cheeks and full rosy lips, very kissable I'd think. While his bum was not as full and round as the preceding lad Andrew it was tightly muscled and dimpled at the side. What you might consider as being athletic. I wonder if he might have run track or played lacrosse in HS. A prime example of healthy young male.

Again I whisked him away to my lair ... er, I mean the quiet back corner to prepare him for viewing. Peter's t-shirt was black and he was fine with bold. I choose a buffalo plaid in black, white and turquoise. Once he was kilted I checked his back side to be certain all was as it should be. Oops a couple of the pleats were twisted. How fortuitous as that meant I need smooth and pet them into place. What?!? I am very subtle ... er, professional. I don't ever suggest I take an inseam just so I can jiggle the googly bits like the tailor downtown. Once all was in readiness I bid his lady join us. Again, shielding him from view. I'll not go through the instructions again since we've just done that with Andrew.

The bell rang, we cried "Kilting" and the lad set forth across the shop. Now while Andrew's pleats danced merrily along behind. Peter's swayed alluringly to the flexing of his firm young hams. His lady was delighted and giggled behind me while recording the event for repeated viewing. Peter stood tall and straight while we boldly evaluated his assets before I bid him return. Again having him pause at the mid point so as to appreciate the front view. The lady and I agreed that while the front was truly delightful we really wanted to  see the back again. The lad acquiesced, turning about. His first stance was bold and striking but on hearing my instruction to stand with his feet shoulder width apart he narrowed his stance. I was forced to bid him spread his legs for me. Which he promptly did. Hear now, minds outta the gutters there was none oh that sort of goings on. I am a professional but I digress.  He stood bold once more with fists on hips. At my request he twisted and looked over his shouler. Now I thought him a young innocent but what gazed at us was an imp with a slightly naughty grin. Delightful.

Thus Peter was made eye candy.

Are you sated yet or must I continue?  Oh, very well ...

Edited September 11, 2023 by dughlas

[Bucket1]

50 minutes ago, dughlas said:

Shall I continue on to the next tale or do need to catch your breath and settle your heart?

To paraphrase Oliver Twist, can we have some more please?  

[raven1]

9 hours ago, clochette said:

Hey Mister T

I'm resting and recharging my social batteries after an intense weekend full of sun, friends, sunbathing on the beach, swimming, ice-cream, long talks into the night and laughter. We even saw the heads of two curious seals swimming about 20-30 meters from us! 

How are you and Aod doing?

Hi Clo!  Sounds like you had a great weekend.  I love going to the beach with friends.  Aod and I spent time with friends and are planning a camping trip soon with them.  We are planning a lunch on Tuesday to firm up the plan. Other than that it was a slow weekend.  Although warm, there were heavy rains and lightning storms all weekend.  That meant some good light shows while protected inside the comfort of home. 😁

[Page Scrawler]

3 minutes ago, raven1 said:

Although warm, there were heavy rains and lightning storms all weekend.  That meant some good light shows while protected inside the comfort of home. 😁

Sounds relaxing. A good day to sit with a book and a cup of tea. Perhaps Masala chai or mint. 

[raven1]

9 hours ago, clochette said:

Need your help for class! 

Do you guys have any exemples of maladjusted children in literature, movies/series/theater/, society...?

So far I've got Forrest Gump, Mowgli, Tarzan, Genie, the ugly ducking and Victor of Aveyron

David Copperfield and Oliver Twist are classic examples by Charles Dickens set in Victorian England.  Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain and most of the young characters in the Percy Jackson series by Rick Riordan (fantasy) also fit.  These are adult literature.  There are some great examples in children's literature also.  Let me know if this helps or if you need some from children's lit.  Is the age level of the reader important to your class?

[dughlas]

The third and final kilting of the day was a slightly older fellow. He and his lady arrived whilst I was preoccupied with seeking respit for my weary bones. It was until he'd selected a kilt in Dress Royal Stewart tartan. One of the only true tartans we carry because it is so readily available and recognised. I leapt to my feet, yes, yes it was more a matter of rising groaning from the stool I was seated upon. Yes, I recognize I am being verbose but in my defense I spent that last two days as a Scot in Elizabethan England. We use lots and lots of words to say little. Afterall, there's really very little else in entertainment if you already heard the gossip about Angus confusing a Frenchman with one of his sheep. Oh by Woden's one eye, it was Viking weekend hence a Viking curse, I digress once more. In my defense I am worn and weary nigh unto death and much in need of a quiet night's respite. See, lots of words saying very little. What? Oh, yes that third kilting.

I've forgotten his name. Let's call him "Yummy" afterall I was gonna turn him into eye candy. Now our lad Yummy was a bit older than the preceding two. I would guess him nigh unto an age with Paige but of an imperial height. I can vouchsafe he was no hobbit as he lacked the large hairy feet. Yummy had broad shoulders, a slim waist and well muscled legs. Most definitely, attractive with warm brown eyes and medium dark hair. He was wearing a light weight denim shirt which nicely coordinated with the blue in the plaid he was wearing. We went through the entire process of the kilt walk. I must say he was prefectly in proportion and looked grand in the kilt. His lady enjoyed it. Sadly, Yummy was not as merry as Andrew and Peter nor was he surly. Dour might best describe him. I think he was not quite comfortable making light of himself so the teasing we do during a kilting and the attention fell flat. Mayhaps in his younger days he was mocked for his size. I was successful however, as I created a truly delightful bit of eye candy. It was a shame he couldn't enjoy it more. Mayhaps another try on a different day we can try one more.

That was the third and final kilting of the day ...

[raven1]

9 hours ago, Bucket1 said:

Hi Terry  

I have a couple more sunny days and then it’s back to cloudy rainy days for the rest of the week. September tends to be a bit hit and miss with the weather. When I used to organise annual community bush walks I always booked them in for early October for the better weather  

The wildflowers this time of year are quite special (biodiversity hotspot here). I have taken a few pictures and made a new greeting card for the holidays - yes a little early…

I loved hiking in the mountains and forests when younger.  It always impressed me when I came into an alpine meadow with millions of brightly colored spring wildflowers.  The weather here is warm but still wet.  October marks the end of the rainy season, so I hope for a lot of sunlight to replace the clouds and lightning soon.  September is a great time to get started on the holiday.  

[raven1]

9 hours ago, Bucket1 said:

You are so mean teasing the boys like that  

Payback for all the whining we have to endure! 

[raven1]

8 hours ago, Page Scrawler said:

That's the boy from Truffaut's film The Wild Child, right? That movie is so underrated. 

Oliver Twist, by Charles Dickens

The City of Ember, by Jeanne DuPrau

The Giver, by Lois Lowry

A Series of Unfortunate Events, by Lemony Snicket

Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, by Mark Twain

Hatchet, by Gary Paulsen

Maybe: Lord of the Flies, by William Golding

Hey Page!  You inspired me to add more to the list for Clo.  Roald Dahl to start.  Witches, BFG, James and the Giant Peach, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and Mathilda were good books made into Movies.  Katherine Paterson wrote some great stories also.  The Great Gilly Hopkins, Bridge to Terabithia, and Jacob I Have Loved are all books that fit the description.

[raven1]

8 hours ago, Mancunian said:

You can't get more maladjusted than Bart Simpson, lol

Try any of the Goosebump series by R L Stine, or Southpark.  Southpark for holds the Guinness World Record for 'Most Swearing In Animated Series'. Also, Kenny got killed in every show.

[Page Scrawler]

@raven1 A Series of Unfortunate Events, dark as it is, has some excellent dry humor. Not to mention the absurdist behavior of the adults. There are two adaptations: A film featuring Jim Carrey, and a Netflix series starring Neil Patrick Harris. Guess which version is better? 

[raven1]

51 minutes ago, dughlas said:

The third and final kilting of the day was a slightly older fellow. He and his lady arrived whilst I was preoccupied with seeking respit for my weary bones. It was until he'd selected a kilt in Dress Royal Stewart tartan. One of the only true tartans we carry because it is so readily available and recognised. I leapt to my feet, yes, yes it was more a matter of rising groaning from the stool I was seated upon. Yes, I recognize I am being verbose but in my defense I spent that last two days as a Scot in Elizabethan England. We use lots and lots of words to say little. Afterall, there's really very little else in entertainment if you already heard the gossip about Angus confusing a Frenchman with one of his sheep. Oh by Woden's one eye, it was Viking weekend hence a Viking curse, I digress once more. In my defense I am worn and weary nigh unto death and much in need of a quiet night's respite. See, lots of words saying very little. What? Oh, yes that third kilting.

I've forgotten his name. Let's call him "Yummy" afterall I was gonna turn him into eye candy. Now our lad Yummy was a bit older than the preceding two. I would guess him nigh unto an age with Paige but of an imperial height. I can vouchsafe he was no hobbit as he lacked the large hairy feet. Yummy had broad shoulders, a slim waist and well muscled legs. Most definitely, attractive with warm brown eyes and medium dark hair. He was wearing a light weight denim shirt which nicely coordinated with the blue in the plaid he was wearing. We went through the entire process of the kilt walk. I must say he was prefectly in proportion and looked grand in the kilt. His lady enjoyed it. Sadly, Yummy was not as merry as Andrew and Peter nor was he surly. Dour might best describe him. I think he was not quite comfortable making light of himself so the teasing we do during a kilting and the attention fell flat. Mayhaps in his younger days he was mocked for his size. I was successful however, as I created a truly delightful bit of eye candy. It was a shame he couldn't enjoy it more. Mayhaps another try on a different day we can try one more.

That was the third and final kilting of the day ...

Hey Dugh!  Love the kilting stories.  Hope you have a restful sleep in spite of the temptation to further activities when you get to bed.  At least limit that activity to one for each of the eye candies you created.  I do love the tales you so wonderfully told. 

[Albert1434]

[raven1]

5 minutes ago, Albert1434 said:

Good Evening Albert!  How are you and Steve today?  Hope your weekend was great. 

[Albert1434]

[Albert1434]

Were good Terry hope you guys are as well