Site Administrator wildone Posted April 28, 2007 Site Administrator Share Posted April 28, 2007 Another GREAT Chapter Steve!! As far as Cody goes, at the "cliffhanger" of the last chapter, I wasn't really too sure if I would trust him, or like him. Guess it shows not to go with first impressions. As far as the thunderstorm theme went, unfortunately I did not like it one bit. I would even go so far as to say I'd rather they had been both on a motorbike. Do you realize that lightning strikes the highest point and in their aroused state....... This feeling may have been the fact that I was struck by lightning myself (a lot of people seem to think it explains alot about me ) But I made it through the chapter on pins and needles, and actually frightened for both of their safety. Now I wonder with Carlos' appearance at the end, and his ribbing, could this be a good thing for the guys. Someone to help with the blow when Dan finds out that Jacob's and Matt's interest isn't towards his daughter. Once again, thanks for a great chapter Link to comment
C James Posted April 28, 2007 Share Posted April 28, 2007 Steve, You, sir, are sneaky! Here I was waiting for an ending where I'd be panting, and I was -- thinking about what Carlos was seeing at the quarry! A naked Jacob and a naked Matt. Oh, man, pant... pant... pant... Uhh, great chapter. But there was that one little word, the rest of Jacob's sentence it started with was cut off. "Someone's..." Oh, man, what might that mean? Spies? Pix?? OMG!! It IS another panting, cliffhanger ending! Colin, that was my thoguht too... Someone could have seen them. Raul with a camera? And that ending was hilarious! Not to mention, yes, a cliffhanger! Another GREAT Chapter Steve!! As far as Cody goes, at the "cliffhanger" of the last chapter, I wasn't really too sure if I would trust him, or like him. Guess it shows not to go with first impressions. As far as the thunderstorm theme went, unfortunately I did not like it one bit. I would even go so far as to say I'd rather they had been both on a motorbike. Do you realize that lightning strikes the highest point and in their aroused state....... This feeling may have been the fact that I was struck by lightning myself (a lot of people seem to think it explains alot about me ) But I made it through the chapter on pins and needles, and actually frightened for both of their safety. Now I wonder with Carlos' appearance at the end, and his ribbing, could this be a good thing for the guys. Someone to help with the blow when Dan finds out that Jacob's and Matt's interest isn't towards his daughter. Once again, thanks for a great chapter Wildone, That must have been a rough scene for you, given what you went through. I'm wondering what Carlos will think? Cody is still a mystery to me. On one hand, he did reject the money and really stick it to Raul. On the other hand, he's back in contact with Jacob, and didn't see fit to tell him that somebody is poking around, offering large sums of money to create "dirt" against him. Surely, he would realize that such a development would be of grave concern? Link to comment
Bob D. Posted April 29, 2007 Share Posted April 29, 2007 (edited) Me sneaky??? NEVER, I always lay everything on the table. Its just too bad said table is in the deepest depths of a dungeon behind a locked door. That is on the other side of a piranha infested moat. Anyhow, There was mention of panting... of suspense... Intrigue. And most of all is Cody going to fold to the lure of money? I must say some of these things are answered in 22, and well the panting, I'll leave that up to you to decide I just have one question for everyone.. When it rains, does it pour? Chapter 22 Steve I don't know yet what you mean by, when it rains, does it pour? According to Murphy's 113th law of rain... it will pour until it floods your basement just after a refurbishment and installation of a new roof and new carpets throughout the house, including the basement... especially after the warehouse had misplaced the carpet of choice for three months and had actually told you it was out of stock and out of circulation... further, the carpet is not replaceable, because the company that made it went under, filed bankruptcy, because you refused to pay for the carpet they said they didn Edited April 29, 2007 by Aillie Link to comment
C James Posted April 29, 2007 Share Posted April 29, 2007 I don't know yet what you mean by, when it rains, does it pour? According to Murphy's 113th law of rain... it will pour until it floods your basement just after a refurbishment and installation of a new roof and new carpets throughout the house, including the basement... especially after the warehouse had misplaced the carpet of choice for three months and had actually told you it was out of stock and out of circulation... further, the carpet is not replaceable, because the company that made it went under, filed bankruptcy, because you refused to pay for the carpet they said they didn Link to comment
Site Administrator wildone Posted April 29, 2007 Site Administrator Share Posted April 29, 2007 The Quarry scene was great, but one thing struck me as intriguing; The Quarry had a beach. Now, your typical abandoned quarry is, in essence, a big hole in the ground with water at the bottom. How would a beach form? Has Shadowgod created a geological anomaly? I have to come to Shadowgod's defence here! Not sure about posting links, but here is a place that I picture when I think of the quarry: Quarry with a beach Link to comment
C James Posted April 29, 2007 Share Posted April 29, 2007 I have to come to Shadowgod's defence here! Not sure about posting links, but here is a place that I picture when I think of the quarry: Quarry with a beach Ack, you are right, that is a quarry, with a beach! Well, my great Quarry Quandary lasted all of a few minutes! But, it is to be expected that I'd put my foot in my mouth; I do have four feet, so it's a common problem. Shadowgod, you were right, Quarry's do have beaches! I for some reason was thinking a deep stone quarry in hard rock, but Shadowgod never specified the type, so it indeed could be a gravel quarry of the type you linked to. Ummm, could I salvage something from this and at least say that I loved the absolutely hilarious cliffhanger in this chapter? Link to comment
Bob D. Posted April 29, 2007 Share Posted April 29, 2007 (edited) Hi Aillie! Hope you enjoyed Ch 22; I sure did. However... There is a bit of a... Quandary... It regard the Quarry... Yes, folks, I hereby announce the Great Living in Surreality Quaint Quarry Quandary Quarrel Quest! The Quarry scene was great, but one thing struck me as intriguing; The Quarry had a beach. Now, your typical abandoned quarry is, in essence, a big hole in the ground with water at the bottom. How would a beach form? Has Shadowgod created a geological anomaly? You're right, I did enjoy it... and Murphy did have a hand in the quarry... with the keys still in the truck... lol. O'course I would be more worried about being found dead and naked struck by lightening near the Explorer than whether or not someone would see me naked and alive. As far as the Goat's Quarry Quibbles: there's http://www.moorooduc.itgo.com/, http://www.raygillfisheries.co.uk/lakes.htm, and http://baytrail.abag.ca.gov/vtour/map4/acc...E/AlamedaNE.htm They all work for general idea... hehe, o'course, I agree with the goat... I was thinking giant limestone quarry with the block removal style so all the edges were squarish... but that doesn't mean the local wildlife and gaming commission hadn't put in a boat ramp paved with gravel? Aillie PS: my most inspiring authors to date... Terry Pratchet, Douglas Adams, and Neil Gaiman... Edited April 29, 2007 by Aillie Link to comment
Rad Posted May 1, 2007 Share Posted May 1, 2007 maaaann.............this story ROCKS! at first I didn't know what to expect I just saw it on CJames' & decided to check it out. I was NOT dissappointed. Jacob, Matt, Valerie. I wa soooo HOOKED on this story I didn't stop writing it. Going on and on and on. it was GREAT! all the things they have been together, all the things they did, overcame & lived through..... my heart really beat HARD when I read how Matt's dad was preparing to destroy them especially as Cody suddenly went into the picture again. I was ready to blame the guy but I was so SURPRISED when basically told the shit Raul to shoved his letter up his ass & ride it 'till dawn. It was sooo GOOD....I was laughing and smiling throughout the whole chapter. Kudos for Cody, even though he's been an ass to Jacob, at least he's got balls when are you going to continue this story? I'm eagerly waiting. cheers & be well, Rad Link to comment
shadowgod Posted May 3, 2007 Author Share Posted May 3, 2007 Glad to see the Great Quarry Quandry (C 2007 Cjames) was short lived. Though I do have a bit of a confession I was thinking of a cut stone quarry over a gravel quarry. Oh well I have officially decided that it was both! cut stone in its infancy then gravel. Can I do that?? Steve! Sorry! I never had any intentions of lighting striking! I have other ways of dispatching, and lightning is just mean... I'm not mean, contrary to popular rumor spread by certin furry four legged members. Rad, Weclome Aboard! the next chapter shouldnt be that far along. I just have to get it written. Pounding the keys for the next few nights so hopefully I'll get it done. Ok so I think that is it unless anyone one has any other 'concerns' Link to comment
C James Posted May 4, 2007 Share Posted May 4, 2007 Glad to see the Great Quarry Quandry (C 2007 Cjames) was short lived. Ahhh, but but I have not yet begun to quander! Though I do have a bit of a confession I was thinking of a cut stone quarry over a gravel quarry. Oh well I have officially decided that it was both! cut stone in its infancy then gravel. Can I do that?? Certainly you can do that! In fact, I fully support it, as it it re-opens the Great Quarry Quandary! Geologically speaking, the chances of a quarry producing gravel and cut stone are rather slim; Gravel is an alluvial deposit, so it would be rather rare to find it in direct conjunction with solid rock. It is possible (postulating an ancient riverbed against a stone cliff here), though, so what we, perhaps, must do is examine, in minute detail, the geology of the area. Steve! Sorry! I never had any intentions of lighting striking! I have other ways of dispatching, and lightning is just mean... I'm not mean, contrary to popular rumor spread by certin furry four legged members. Would I do such a thing as that? I merely bespeak the truth; given the mortality rate in your stories, (*cough* winter anthology*cough*) you are unspeakably cruel to your characters, and lets not forget all the mean situations you throw at them. Oh, and the eeevil cliffhangers, too Seriously though, I can't wait to see what becomes of Jacob and Matt's exposed predicament... (and that's not all that's exposed!) Link to comment
Bondwriter Posted May 5, 2007 Share Posted May 5, 2007 I merely bespeak the truth; given the mortality rate in your stories, (*cough* winter anthology*cough*) you are unspeakably cruel to your characters, and lets not forget all the mean situations you throw at them. Oh, and the eeevil cliffhangers, too OK, if some characters have to suffer in this story, I propose ("and the nominates for Being Meanly Dispatched are...") Richard, Catherine and Raul. Let the others in peace. Link to comment
shadowgod Posted May 5, 2007 Author Share Posted May 5, 2007 Gesh... go one way with ONE character and Im labeled for life... Oh Richard and Catherine may just get theirs in the end, as for Raul well he's just a hired goon So can he really be copable for his actions? Link to comment
Bondwriter Posted May 5, 2007 Share Posted May 5, 2007 Oh Richard and Catherine may just get theirs in the end, as for Raul well he's just a hired goon So can he really be copable for his actions? Don't know about Raul being liable for his misdeeds as 'just' a hired goon, but fodder for disaster, mayhem or chaos, yes! Link to comment
Conner Posted May 5, 2007 Share Posted May 5, 2007 Steve, You have taken this story to a new level. Chapter 22 has everything I look for...excellent writing, hot sex, humour, hot sex, intrique, hot sex, great dialogue and character interaction and, yeah, hot sex. Believe it or not, we do have hot, humid weather here in Canada. It often makes the igloos melt. Your description of the humid conditions totally had me 'feeling' it. Now that's a talent. I got the same hot, humid feeling during the sex scene....but let's not go there. One thing I didn't quite get...what did Valerie mean when she said to Jacob that he had a penchant for squeezing into tight places??? The chapter ending was absolutely superb! I was really glad it was Carlos who was sent to the rescue. I just know that he's going to play that out for every last humiliating moment. Conner Link to comment
C James Posted May 7, 2007 Share Posted May 7, 2007 Gesh... go one way with ONE character and Im labeled for life... One? Shall I name more? Don't know about Raul being liable for his misdeeds as 'just' a hired goon, but fodder for disaster, mayhem or chaos, yes! Ahh yes, Raul's hands are far from clean. Mayhem and Chaos are indeed in order! The chapter ending was absolutely superb! I was really glad it was Carlos who was sent to the rescue. I just know that he's going to play that out for every last humiliating moment. I'll bet he will! I just loved the predicament; locked out without clothes! They could have asked Val to bring them some clothes, but, they probably knew what her answer would be. Link to comment
shadowgod Posted May 9, 2007 Author Share Posted May 9, 2007 Steve, You have taken this story to a new level. Chapter 22 has everything I look for...excellent writing, hot sex, humour, hot sex, intrique, hot sex, great dialogue and character interaction and, yeah, hot sex. *coughs* 13 *coughs* Believe it or not, we do have hot, humid weather here in Canada. It often makes the igloos melt. Your description of the humid conditions totally had me 'feeling' it. Now that's a talent. I got the same hot, humid feeling during the sex scene....but let's not go there. One thing I didn't quite get...what did Valerie mean when she said to Jacob that he had a penchant for squeezing into tight places??? Conner GREAT!!! I love that you and a few others think I captured the humidity particularly well and as for Valeries line... Judging by the line of smilies I'd say you understood the meaning behind it quite well One? Shall I name more? You could but I would deny and say that anything that resembles this story was stolen by a nafarious Hacker of ill-repute down AZ way... ****Posting Update**** A few things have come up... mostly family affairs that have required my attention the last few weekends (which is when I get the bulk of my writing done) SO I am still working on chapter 23. But I will keep you guys informed as to when it will be published. Thanks for understanding and waiting... somewhat paitently You guys are great Steve Link to comment
C James Posted May 13, 2007 Share Posted May 13, 2007 You could but I would deny and say that anything that resembles this story was stolen by a nafarious Hacker of ill-repute down AZ way... *cough* Destiny of Time*cough* A few things have come up... mostly family affairs that have required my attention the last few weekends (which is when I get the bulk of my writing done) SO I am still working on chapter 23. But I will keep you guys informed as to when it will be published. Thanks for understanding and waiting... somewhat paitently You guys are great Would anyone care to join me in chanting "23"? Perhaps we wouldn't be so anxious if you hadn't left us with such a nail-biting cliffhanger, but, nah, we probably would anyway. I can't wait to see what Carlos does. And BTW, the way he calls Jacob "Cupcake" is freaking hilarious, I love it! Link to comment
shadowgod Posted May 17, 2007 Author Share Posted May 17, 2007 *cough* Destiny of Time*cough* It is now time to assert that original work was stolen by a hacker that goes by the name of blackheart. I have no association with said fiend (anymore...) Though I do hear he made a mess out LiS as well ... something about a motorcycle?? Would anyone care to join me in chanting "23"? Perhaps we wouldn't be so anxious if you hadn't left us with such a nail-biting cliffhanger, but, nah, we probably would anyway. I can't wait to see what Carlos does. And BTW, the way he calls Jacob "Cupcake" is freaking hilarious, I love it! OOOooooo Can I play to?? 23... 23... 23... 23... Is it working yet? I keep telling you to get me the chapter back so I can move the process forward but. NOOooooOOOoooo you have to be difficult! (yeah I stole that from you ) And the cupcake thing is rather endearing of Carlos isn't it? I dunno way back when when I first wrote Carlos it seemed like a logical term his character would use. I don't know if anyone here has had the pleasure of working in a an enviroment that is predominately male. I have it was a print shop a number of years ago that probably printed your Wal-Mart advert. Let's just say that the good natured ribbing was very eye opening. Especialy when self professed straight males had a habit of approaching coworkers from behind and rubbing against them lescheviously... all for a good laugh of course And that is where the inspiration for Carlos came from, aside from the way Carlos looks in my head... that's a whole different story alltogether. LiS 23 Next week I promise. I have a free weekend and am done with 1/3 of it and what I consider the hardest part. Link to comment
C James Posted May 17, 2007 Share Posted May 17, 2007 It is now time to assert that original work was stolen by a hacker that goes by the name of blackheart. I have no association with said fiend (anymore...) Though I do hear he made a mess out LiS as well ... something about a motorcycle?? What? You aren't Blackheart? Oh no... Now I have to make some serious changes to FTL... :wacko: And as for Motorcycles, yes, it is certainly very good that you intend no such thing for LiS. OOOooooo Can I play to?? 23... 23... 23... 23... Is it working yet? I keep telling you to get me the chapter back so I can move the process forward but. NOOooooOOOoooo you have to be difficult! (yeah I stole that from you ) I'll make you a deal... Send me Ch 31 of FTL and I'll send you Ch 23 of LiS. And the cupcake thing is rather endearing of Carlos isn't it? I dunno way back when when I first wrote Carlos it seemed like a logical term his character would use. I don't know if anyone here has had the pleasure of working in a an enviroment that is predominately male. I have it was a print shop a number of years ago that probably printed your Wal-Mart advert. Let's just say that the good natured ribbing was very eye opening. Especialy when self professed straight males had a habit of approaching coworkers from behind and rubbing against them lescheviously... all for a good laugh of course And that is where the inspiration for Carlos came from, aside from the way Carlos looks in my head... that's a whole different story alltogether. ROFL! I've seen that before, and Dan's garage captures it very well indeed. LiS 23 Next week I promise. I have a free weekend and am done with 1/3 of it and what I consider the hardest part. Next week? NEXT WEEK?!?!? You leave us with one of your evil, wicked cliffhangers and you make us wait another week? Link to comment
colinian Posted May 18, 2007 Share Posted May 18, 2007 I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23... Aaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrggghhhhhhhhh! Colin Link to comment
shadowgod Posted May 20, 2007 Author Share Posted May 20, 2007 I'm not going to think about chapter 23.I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23. I'm not going to think about chapter 23... Aaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrggghhhhhhhhh! Colin Go ahead and think about it.... off to beta and editing Sorry it took so long but I have a few surprises up my sleeve as of yet. Link to comment
C James Posted May 21, 2007 Share Posted May 21, 2007 Go ahead and think about it.... off to beta and editing Sorry it took so long but I have a few surprises up my sleeve as of yet. Remember, folks, he's evil, so "surprises" probably means bad, bad things... Link to comment
Site Administrator wildone Posted May 22, 2007 Site Administrator Share Posted May 22, 2007 Steve, You got to help us out here!!! Without LiS updates, my mind is starting to shrivel up from inadequate use (kinda like other parts) So, hoping it will help, I will join in on the chant. 23 23 23 23 24 (Okay, wishful thinking on the last one ) Link to comment
shadowgod Posted May 22, 2007 Author Share Posted May 22, 2007 Remember, folks, he's evil, so "surprises" probably means bad, bad things... Next thing you know he will be telling his throngs of devoted posters that lil' ole' me is the inspiration and menace behind this blackheart fiend he's brewing up! Surprises may be good... surprises may be bad... then again it could just be, you know, a surprie Steve, You got to help us out here!!! Without LiS updates, my mind is starting to shrivel up from inadequate use (kinda like other parts) So, hoping it will help, I will join in on the chant. 23 23 23 23 24 (Okay, wishful thinking on the last one ) a shriveled mind is a terrible thing! (kinda like other parts ) Seriously, I expect 23 back either today or tomorrow and being the nice, kinder, gentler guy I now am. (hint: you neigh saying goat) I will post it in efiction as so as I have it back in my hot little hands. and 24? already in the works along with a side project... So expect that soon too! Link to comment
C James Posted May 22, 2007 Share Posted May 22, 2007 Next thing you know he will be telling his throngs of devoted posters that lil' ole' me is the inspiration and menace behind this blackheart fiend he's brewing up! Seriously, I expect 23 back either today or tomorrow and being the nice, kinder, gentler guy I now am. (hint: you neigh saying goat) I will post it in efiction as so as I have it back in my hot little hands. and 24? already in the works along with a side project... So expect that soon too! What? Surely you aren't upset that I have exposed your black-hearted past? So, does this mean we need not worry further about, say, Motorcycles? Link to comment
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