For me, the hardest thing is the mood shifts. I can deal with the mania, I've learned over the years how to channel it into art, music, writing, photography, martial arts, all the things i love and that give me a positive outlet for all the excess energy. it's far, far better than the distruction I used to engage in as a teen. I hate what I've come to call the "down time" the depression, the days when i cry over next to nothing, or can't seem to find the energy to even bother to cook a meal. The worse part of it is how hard I am on myself in those moments, the way the inner voice in my head points out all the flaws, all the mistakes, and pokes at them till I feel even worse. When I'm "up" I can go and go and only need 4-5 hours of sleep at night, but when I'm "down" I feel like i can't get enough sleep, and want nothing more than to just pull the blankets over my head and stay in my warm bed with my cats. I hate those moments, and kicking myself for laying there and getting nothing done, even when getting up and trying to push myself to do something just ends up like trying to walk through fog. It's taken me years to figure out some of the triggers and avoid them, but nothings fool proof, unfortunatly. The only saving grace has been that in the last few years, the periods of just feeling down and miserable have gotten shorter. I just really hope it stays that way.