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Writing Tip: Story Cost.... More Or Less


Renee Stevens

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So, I was looking through some of the blog articles that I have and was trying to decide what would be a good choice for Wacky Wednesday. It was a hard choice, to be honest, but then I came across this little gem. Since I don't want to give too much away, I'll just let you see for yourself what I found...

Story Cost... More or Less


by Cia

 


Yes, we're putting a price on stories. No more free fiction.

 

*snickers*

 

Are you getting ready to flame me? Okay, okay, we're not going to stop anyone from posting free stories or anything.

 

However, I did want to share some thoughts I recently had on 'fifty cent' words and their place in fiction. These so called fifty cent words are ones that catch your eye, the big words full of rich meaning in the English language (or whatever the author writes in).

 

So many times I see a story littered with them with every sentence structured to feature the words that jump out at readers, sometimes even hosting two or three of them! I guess to some that's a good thing. They like to use those fifty cent words, thinking they increase the worth of their story.

 

For example: "Oh, how spectacular," she exclaimed fervently, enthralled by the landscape when she beheld the vermillion flowers carpeting the verdant meadow.

 

Now, my writing is all about entertainment. I'm after the picture, not the words, to be memorable for my readers.

 

I'm not trying to enlighten anyone when I write, I'm trying to entertain. For my style bigger is not better. I made those mistakes at first, throwing out the unusual words with great shades of meaning, but those become annoying and difficult to wade through for the average reader. Sure, there was little confusion for those of us who grew up reading the dictionary for fun, but for the other 99% of readers it isn't nearly as enjoyable. (Yes, self-confessed geek here, lol)

 

I came to a decision. My goal is to always make the words in a story as invisible as possible. That means using simple phrases and key words everyone knows to create vivid images in the reader's mind. I'm a big fan of 'nickel words' of the fiction world you might call them. I don't want my writing to get in the way of my story, so I streamline visuals and add only the essential descriptions.

 

Or you could just call me cheap!

 

For example: "Oh!" Her bright smile lit up her eyes. She gripped his hand as she stared, taking in the ruby red flowers carpeting the lush meadow.

 

The second example is simpler but very visual and still rich with meaning. I use the word ruby to evoke a vivid red color everyone knows, and since most people already think of meadows as green, I used lush. It works since we usually relate the word to something really rich with gives a visual of a green meadow with a ton of plant life and flowers. I also avoid the speech tag and instead show her reaction with visual cues, so the reader can see how she feels and, therefore, get a better 'picture' than if I tell them she's excited.

 

Now, I'm not saying using big words is wrong all the time, or that they can't enhance a story. You might have a discussion between two doctors, for example, and they'd logically use more technical words than the average person--depending on the discussion. A story set back in the Victorian era would also be more adaptable to a flowery turn of phrase because that is the expected speech pattern of the time.

 

But for regular ole entertaining stories, the kind I enjoy presenting to my readers, I think I'll stick to my trusty nickel words!

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Let us not forget penny sports metaphors in a story that is wholly unrelated to the sport or any sport for that matter.

 

In this modern electronic world we live in, it is easier than ever to merely highlight a word and touch define on a pad or copy and paste on a computer and one has a definition without a mountain of effort. It also doesn't hurt to know some fifty cent words and their meanings either.

 

I do understand what is being said but on the other hand, words are fun and one can have fun playing with them in their writing. Context alone often provides enough clue to an unfamiliar word that one does not have to stop the flow of the story to look it up to get the gist. When it does not and the writing is good, I don't personally mind looking a word up. When a story is not extraordinary in its content, then I can choose to gloss over the odd word and not miss a beat.

 

At the end of the day, there is nothing wrong about playing to your strengths and the audience that you have or want.

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*high fives for the lion-lady*

 

Cheap words rock. Expensive ones are nice too. i like words which sound cool when you say them. I had a whole conversation today with a student about the way "Connecticut" sounds when you say it.

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I'd like to believe it's all about balance. Two many flowery words and you come off as trying to be too intellectual and turn off your readers. Some here and there and they can add unique character to your style while still conveying your story. But clean and simple can be just as effective.

 

While its true that in the electronic age, touching a word for its definition is easy, I would prefer not to disrupt the flow of the story more often than necessary. I like to keep everyone in their headspace and hopefully immersed in the tale. :)

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To me - it isn't about the nickle words vs the fifty centers. Its about how well the author draws pictures with those words. When well written, I tend to sink into the story and "see" it rather than just read it. While I have no objection to adding words to my vocabulary, if I find the text too filled with huge words put there just to be impressive the story loses my interest. If the author makes a habit of sitting with a thesaurus while writing, I tend not to revisit their works.

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In modern times it's far too easy to right click on the mouse and see the magical long list of fancy words appear courtesy of MS Word's thesaurus.

 

 Do that to a few words in a sentence and you can up with some nonsensical rubbish like:

 

The natural satellite elevated beyond the perspective and stood out on the abundant turf

 

When what you actually meant was:

 

The moon rose above the horizon and shone on the lush meadow

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Ooh!, sentence play. Me too, me too:

 

The moon rose over the edge of the earth, causing shadow to reach out; to clutch and extinguish in darkness those in the meadow not yet reached by her light.

 

 

Disclaimer: No words were harmed in the above sentence by a thesaurus. Imagination was all the havoc required. :P

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The other thing about using expensive words is that it makes the story inaccessible for people who don't have a good level of English (like people whose mother language is not English, or people with learning difficulties).

 

And it's fine to say that it's an electronic age and lots of people have access to ebooks and ipads and internet and all that - but there is a whole world out there who doesn't have access to those things. Even if they manage to get in a computer to read stories online, we can't just assume they will know how to look up words of even if they will want to - maybe they have a very limited time in the internet (I'm thinking internet caffes, for example), or the connection is not good and it takes a long time to load pages...

 

I guess what I'm trying to say is that just because most of you here seem to be native English speakers with easy means to access modern technology, don't assume everyone is like you.

So, if "broad accessibility" is something you think worth going for, it might be worth using less of those expensive words and, just like Cia said, go for simpler descriptions that still create powerful pictures in people's heads.

(That said, if that's not something you're interested in, feel free to dump a thesarus in your work. There are people who like to read that and value this kind of thing. So there, everyone can be happy in whatever style they work with) 

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Yeah, I'm going to be odd one out here.  I'm not one for invisible prose. I read authors less and less for story these days , but because I enjoy the way they write.

 

The problem for me isn't hard words per se but hard words that don't suit the level of diction the prose suggests, or hard words and a prose style that doesn't sing so to say. There are plenty of writers who rock hard words, but readers don't complain because it all so fits e.g. Cormac McCarthy, Will Self.

 

It's also a matter of audience. For every reader who complain Blood Meridian is a pretentious tome, there are others who enjoy its paragraph long sentences and 50 dollar words galore. Mind you this special group isn't especially obscure. 

 

Goals, audience and artistic inclinations are what matters.  If reader entertainment is what you care for the most then simple is best. Go for a conversational style.  I'd advise writers that readers as a whole care lot more for story than prose, so really simplicity should be the default.

 

But if you long to use your vast bank of big words, you should be resigned to a smaller slice of readers.  Also you should be ready to work twice to hard to make the prose work. With big words, come big expectations. I get excited over the prospect of reading interesting imageries or allusions, or well crafted sentences and the like. It's disappointing to come across prose full of big words, but with a decidedly adolescent workmanship. If I'm going to be patient with your writing, you had better offer me something magical.

 

The simple fact is, it is lot easier to disappoint a reader with a mannered style than with a simple style.   To get to the level where your mannered style is readable, takes hours of fussing and obsessing over sentences, years definitely of practice.  You don't just make a go at it.  Even with all the practice and polish, you'd still get readers that smatter about you being pretentious and all what not.  

 

But hell, if that's what you want to do, then go for it.  The shelves are replete with books with invisible prose, so I'm quite happy Cormac McCarthy didn't listen to those who told him to stick to simple.

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Too true Crazyfish. They have their time and place in stories, and I enjoy them when they are used well. I'm a bit of a contradiction myself. I was reading stories like Huck Finn by age 9. Some of my favorite stories growing up, and continue to still enjoy? The Lord of the Rings series, Dune series, Morgan's Run, The Scarlet Letter, Outlander series, Consolidated works of Shakespeare (with favorites like The Tempest and MacBeth), Clan of the Cave Bear series... all long-winded stories rich with a lot of detail... in some cases a LOT Of detail often in long, drawn out sentences. Hebert was slightly different from most earlier authors in that he used mostly concise sentences... he just wrote a huge universe into a story. I love stories rich in detail to read, if I can get into them.

 

As a kid, I had limited access to new books, only 3 from the roaming book-mobile van ever 3 weeks that often didn't restock new books but every 3 months. I wanted substance, length, and complexity that I could read and enjoy many times. But for me reading is like watching a movie in my head. I don't remember even turning pages, I 'see' the words in my head. I can be captured in a story for hours, not realizing, if it's good enough. The problem is, if I don't know a word--especially if it is placed in a pivotal moment--I'm drawn out of my internal movie. I have a huge vocabulary so anymore that's rare, but occasionally it still happens.

 

I'm not on par with any of my favorite authors, and I'm okay with that. I still think how an author chooses to write does depend a lot on the audience. For all the crap about 'write for yourself', to some extent we all write to be read. Today's readers are different from those 20 years ago, 50 years ago. As you can see with the trends of the authors over time to today, there are distinct changes in what is being published. Concise sentences, direct action, less setting and more plot progression are the editors' words to live by. I'm a simple author, not matter what my tastes are for reading. I believe in entertainment without complication, not because I think my readers can't understand something more complicated, but because what purpose does it serve? I know how many big words I know... doesn't mean I have to use them. ;)  

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