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Cia

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Everything posted by Cia

  1. Cia

    Chapter 2

    Good story, I'm glad to see you're posting it here!
  2. Cia

    Pricolici

    Thank you so much! I didn't want to go with run of the mill werewolves, so adding in an ancient mythologial magician that is also a wolf, that just spiced it up! I'm glad you enjoyed the story, thanks for the review too!!!
  3. Cia

    Story

    Who knew I had so many other worlds stuck in my head? I'm glad I found GA and you encouraged me to explore them! I do understand what you mean by the characters being a bit like Glory and Sar, that very dynamic push and pull with their egos and personalities vying for control of various aspects of their life. I love werewolves and adding in one that can also change the weather and do other magical things was a great lot of fun to write. I have many other ideas for Tucker as he explores his powers, poor Stelian is going to have his hands full. Then again, he's going to enjoying keeping Tucker in line I think, maybe just a little too much, lol! Thanks for reading and reviewing!!
  4. Thanks Bandage! You always like my stories, you're like my own personal cheering section. Thanks so much!!! I hope to be able to keep going with these guys soon.
  5. Cia

    Story

    Thank you Carrington! So complimentary!! I definitely want to keep writing in this world, I just have to find the time. I'm not sure what that other book you mentioned is, but if it's good, let me know Thanks for the review hun!
  6. Cia

    Not A Legend

    This is a great poem, and so fitting for a parent. That bond between father and daughter is very sacred. I'm so glad you shared this.
  7. To say nothing of your own work, tsk tsk! Aren't you done with your serial yet? I've let several chapters build up because I just hate waiting. Hurry up! *stalks you*
  8. LOL! I love the slightly hairier versions of the alpha male myself as well I just need more time in my day to write!!! Any suggestions??
  9. Cia

    Story

    I find I like wolves more for the same reason. More primal, right? I like a mix of modern/fantasy with were-creature types, hence my Carthera. For this I went very old mythos with this story and hung it on certain aspects of actual Dacian mythology, with a good fiction twisting. However, one point that relates to your story. The men who were at the clearing at 'Hunters', the lupes that police their kind. Stelian's haitas pretty much makes up their numbers because they are the oldest and most powerful lupes, many of them well over a thousand years old, if not more, such as Phell, before he went bad. Some lived in the old country and saw hultans first hand, the others I did envision with that warriors air of companionship, sitting around the fire (or bar) and telling old stories of battles and dominance displays. Those who were there would have known about hultans. However, just because I equated those aspects together, doesn't mean I related it to the reader. Thanks for pointing that out, I'll work on it. I really appreciate the review. I love it when people like the story but I always like to have aspects that can be improved for the next story.
  10. Cia

    L.A.F.

    I laughed when I edited this and I laughed when I read it again. I love how absolutely impossible you make the story sound when you write stuff and then have this spin so that I don't think the story is completely improbable or too silly for words.
  11. Cia

    Reflection

    Okay, you lost me when you hit the drunk bar scene. It was just too 'oh my god, let's be even bigger idiots'. I like the premise of your story I just couldn't get past the overdone BMOC, slut girlfriend, and nerdy roommate characters.
  12. I like your overall story plan here, with the flashes, however, I found them to be contradictory at various places. Like when you have the scene where he wakes up in a forest, and then you said he woke up in a field. Can't have both usually. Most of the time spaces inside a forest would be a clearing. Then you have him waking up as a beggar and you say he remembers nothing, and then you have him remember patches of the woman, the courthouse (which hadn't even happened yet in the flashes you showed us) and the gate. Those inconsistencies happened quite a bit in the story and confused me beyond the already disjointed story style. If it had a bit better of a flow with those types of errors removed, I would have enjoyed it more I think.
  13. You asked for specific instances so I thought I would share them here, in regards to your dialogue punctuation. The first type I noticed was this: When he raised it again he went on. "We won't be sitting here together a year from now." Basically, when you have a speech tag before dialogue, you end the sentence with a comma. 'he went on' is indicating he is speaking, not an action, so the period before your dialogue should be a comma. That ties in a bit with the second issue I noticed. "For as much as that's worth", he twinkled. as well as "What's wrong, mummy?", are both improper uses of commas with dialogue punctuation. You always put the comma inside the quotation marks when you have a speech tag after the dialogue unless you use ! or ?. If you end a sentence with ? or ! you do not add a comma after the quotation marks. Hope that helps on what I was trying to point out in my review. I enjoyed the story, thanks for sharing!
  14. Cia

    Chapter 1

    Very sneaky spy and adrenaline intent for your plot. However, I found the delivery kept me from really enjoying the story. Your punctuation was all over the place and I had a hard time seeing the characters as 'in character'. For example, the beginning part of the story has the doctor updating the project status and he says, much more safer. Usually a highly educated doctor would be more eloquent and follow proper grammar rules. Do some writing rules/english grammar research, I am always finding new rules I am breaking since English is such a complicated language.
  15. Cia

    Story

    Yes, after I finished this story, I was in the works on a second for the anthology that I just couldn't finish on time because this story was nagging at me that it needed to continue. I want more as well, I think Tucker and Stelian have a lot more to say and do. As soon as I have the time to get back to them, you'll see them return! Thanks so much for the review hun!
  16. Kinky and creepy all mixed up into a wonderfully suspenseful tale. I loved it the first time and the second, though usually twincest gives me the shudders, lol. Great job, as always!
  17. Cia

    Where it all began

    A very complex fantasy, you did a great job with your 'fan-fiction'.
  18. Cia

    Chapter 1

    I really like the emotions you created with this character and the visuals, all without really describing anything. Psychic painter indeed.
  19. Cia

    Funny Story

    I understood (snickers, sorry) and wow, Nephy, you're umm... strong! Yeah, we'll go with being amazed at the strength to hold on to something enough to dislocate your own shoulder. Uh huh, that's the aspect to 'push' on the whole situation.
  20. Cia

    Chapter 2

    Well, this is sort of alternate earth/evolution as a story base, which is why I made it a fantasy, but yes, I do plan to show more of the history in this story, along with a few present day problems for both guys, and all the complications a new relationship brings to it, even one that starts out so instantly bonding as a Carthera mate bond. After all... that's just not human, right? I don't want to give too much away so I'll leave it at that. I'm glad you like the story and the series overall, that gave me a huge smile because the world is my favorite to go to when I write as well! Thanks for the review John!!
  21. Sometimes I'll get this surge of 'oh my god that's so great' when reading or watching stuff and I get a little teary eyed. I rarely actually cry in those moments though. I cry in sadness in stories a lot, some movies, though not as much as reading. When I had my kids I cried. Not quite sure if those were tears of, oh thank god, that hurt so much and it's mostly over relief, or pure joy at seeing them finally, but those moments are forever ingrained on me.
  22. Welcome, InTheMindOfSunshine, and Sorgbarn! It's always great to have new writers and readers (especially those who will review) sign up!
  23. Cia

    Chapter 2

    Yep, too cruel to be kind. I'll admit to finding stories with biting involved can be intensely erotic, if it's done right. Hopefully, I'll keep it in that vein Another chapter will be loaded in the next few days, never fear!! Thanks for the review Nephy!!!
  24. Cia

    Chapter 2

    Of course he does. Snakes a beautiful, deadly creatures. We should respect them, but not automatically fear them. I'm playing with that in this story as well. Dav... well, he's too hot not to want to play with, lol! You'll find out who is at the door in the next chapter, promise!! Thanks for the review hun!
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