pvtguy
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Everything posted by pvtguy
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Thank you, thank you thank you!!! I love this story and I am glad you are finally able to continue it!
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I just want to see good things for Chipper. However, not path is completely without a few stumbles and/or side roads. And sometimes those detours provide great growth opportunities, painful though they may be. I trust he is smart enough to not totally lose caution! Tony
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Chapter 125 The Boy from Neverland
pvtguy commented on Dodger's story chapter in Chapter 125 The Boy from Neverland
Really wonderful chapter, Dodger! So much has been said in the other comments and I don't want to repeat. Please be quick with the next chapter. I really want to see Don getting a bit of karma! Tony -
Again, a lot packed into a small space. Well done!!! Adam's faith in Chipper is sure to pay off in many serendipitous ways! Tony
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A courtroom drama that involves drinking and driving, challenging perceptions of various groups (police and bikers), and wonderful characters. A definite worthwhile read!!
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Excellent story - very well written, serious topics but interjected with humor, and good characters. Tony
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I really ad The Pendleton Omens a while ago. Also Quabbin. I do enjoy your writing.
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Ah....much better closure with this chapter. It was an enjoyable read. Tony
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I guess this makes as good an ending as any....just doesn't feel fully satisfying.
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This format forces you to create a lot in a short amount of space, and you do not disappoint! One can feel the tension, excitement, and drama of the show. Well done! Come on, Tuesday!!! Tony
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It was good to see the planning for the Haunted House. It was very real with the near fight over who would be doing what. It was good to see the resolution. The parties were wonderful - very creative! Wonderful chapter!
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I really like the premise of this story: siblings who really don't know one another and only have their mother in common between the two sets of full-blooded sibs. I like the fact that the story is unveiling slowly. It gives a chance to feel present with them. My only constructive criticism is the rough grammar seen periodically. Need a proofreader? I would volunteer! Tony
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Wonderfully warm and very natural chapter! Though, as indicated, the content was known somewhat beforehand before taping, it still felt very spontaneous. In that Cristina has announced what is happening in her life, her husband is on notice that she has very powerful people working for her. Looking forward to Friday!! Tony
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ACH!!!! Just as you get to the solution, you give us a short chapter with a cliffhanger! Good job! Next chapter soon, please!!!!
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You make even the hum-drum, day to day experiences engaging. This chapter drops hints of coming events: the adoptions, the Haunted House, Julie's progress (or lack thereof), the kids growing up, and the continued comradery of the brothers/husbands as they continue the tradition of the Castaway Hotel. Wonderful work! Tony
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The final scene sums up a lot: Sue has been confronted in very plain language and it can only be assumed that her sharing this information with Don is what drove him out of the house. Robbie has heard himself referred to as a normal teenager - not one with serious disabilities or abnormalities. Thanks for posting...hope the next chapter comes soon! Tony
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I do understand this - I just mean that I am enjoying the story and its development.
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I love how you are taking us through the inquiring mind of the detective at heart. I am eager to see how this pulls together.
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Marvelous job, Carlos. Sticking to the 1000 word limit will definitely be challenging, but it does teach good lessons in precise writing. I applaud your efforts. As to the story, you are a master at creating wonderful characters and compelling stories. How wonderful that Chipper has the contacts to help immediately with Cristina's situation: not everyone who is in this position has those resources so readily available. I am eager to see how this progresses. I do like this format, though will admit I also enjoy your longer chapters too. Tony
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I am so glad you are posting another story. In focusing on one of the Squad, you still are keeping us connected to the family. It actually allows for a much more complete view of another individual member. I, for one (and I'm sure I'm not alone), appreciate your sharing your talent and feel a void when you take a well-deserved break. Tony
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Sometimes it takes something that interrupts one's normal thinking to begin to view things from a new perspective. I'm eager to see where this takes us...
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I can understand this POV, but I also think about when the kids are older and think about their mother. It is great that what they will remember is her in better health and wanting to give them the gift of a loving home, which they have found. I do know that there is also the POV that one wants to be able to learn from and say things from their parent while they can. Perhaps in that Hunter and Hayden are still rather young (8 years old), then having negative memories of the nursing home would not be the greatest either. I like the way you're handling it - just my own questions.
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Another enjoyable chapter. And...we got to vicariously visit a museum and ride an Incline Plane! Just wondering - what is the distance they have to travel to visit Julie? I can't understand why they wouldn't visit more often, realizing her condition and that they are eventually going to have to deal with her death?
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Slow, but sure, it sounds as though things are starting to fall into place.
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" I'm still considering another book, but I'll be putting out a feeler in the next chapter to see how many are interested in me doing that." Can you consider the first vote for another book? Yes!!!!!
