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Jason Rimbaud

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  1. Jason Rimbaud

    Chapter 1

    Having read the story and then all the comments, I'm not surprised at the reaction. We throw away discussion on writing, or technique, I think those are obvious. We can also throw out hints that Morris might be otherworldly or some kind of evil presence, there are hints that tread towards that vein but since there is no resolution, its moot. So we have to digest what was presented. Being a survivor of abuse, this story brought up too many memories, and yes I read the warning but I chose to ignore them to see what the fuss was about. Normally you would think in the end Morris would get what is coming, Lucas would bring the police back and the man would be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. But we are left with the feeling that Lucas feels grateful for being abused. Much like what happened to me. As gay kids, told this is wrong, when an adult accepts us and let's us explore what we've been dying to explore we feel that relief and acceptance. Which is why most of the time we continue the abuse longer than we would. I don't believe in censorship, and I am not saying this shouldn't be allowed. It's just that I am struggling to understand who this story is written for. It's not a warning story for children to be careful and never talk to strangers. It almost reads as a how to guide to take advantage of questioning youth. The slant on making Morris so understanding and just trying to help poor ole Lucas comes across as predatory because it is. I've met plenty of Morris's in my life. Sadly, a few too many Lucas's as well. I hope once the authors are revealed, the author can give us insight to help clear up some of the questions as to motivation. I will reserve judgement until then because I am never one to jump to assumptions. But this story is disturbing on multiple levels and one I won't be reading twice. J
  2. Jason Rimbaud

    Chapter 1

    Attracted to the story due to the title, stayed for the offbeat humor, some really clever puns. On the ending, can one know something and not know they know? Can the protagonist haunt himself? Interesting conclusion and probably a story I'll read again to fully digest it. I like this one.
  3. Jason Rimbaud

    Chapter 1

    For two months I purposefully stayed away from GA, I have too many things going on to get sucked into the madness of the SA contest. So I did not participate on purpose. So this is the first story I read. And the reason why I did, someone thought I might have been the creator behind this amazing premise yet flawed delivery. First half, shrug, second half, better, final third, great premise with one great line with a surprise ending. PS: Fuck Seth Rogan J
  4. Jason Rimbaud

    The Grand Feint

    I never got the pleasure of knowing the author, I bet he was fascinating to chat with over adult beverages. His love for boating, traveling, and speedos are as clear as his aversion to making Trevor a believable gay character. There is so much filler and fluff in this story one could cut out tens of thousands of words and never lose anything. Which is frustrating because when this story is good, it's really good. The pirate sequence, Trevor's fight to stay alive, brilliant. His run across the ocean in a broken boat, needed to be tighter, but believable to someone who knew nothing about navigation. Did we need pages of him building gadgets, detailed descriptions that I'm sure almost everyone glossed over with dull eyes? The answer is no, we didn't. Is this a story or a travelogue or worse yet, a commercial for Catamarans? The rest of this comment has been deleted as I felt it was too mean as the author can't defend his choices. If I didn't like this story why am I commenting at chapter 120. I gave up the first three times I tried to read this story. The last comment I made was back in chapter nine when I threw in the towel over two years ago. But two weeks ago, I decided I have to know why this story is held in such high regard. Maybe the author sticks the landing, so I have about thirty or so chapters left. I will finish it.
  5. I got trapped into re-imagining something else, the good news it started out as me editing a very old story on GA that was finished twenty years ago and morphed into an original story that was inspired and pays homage to this older story while being updated with a different premise and all new characters and situations. I am coming to the ending, about twenty chapters with 100K words or so. That being said, I am going to move back to Glacier Bay and finish what needs to be finished so I can make Glacier Bay my main focus. I get sidetracked too easily sometimes. I think Lee has already edited the chapters and I just need to post them. Man do I get distracted by bright shiny objects. PS: This new story is called Captivated By Kai A Glacier Bay Story J
  6. Thank you for putting up with my ridiculous comments and made up backstories. And of course for the countless coffee chats, camping adventures, and such. EDIT: PS, where you make your mistakes, is in the comments. that is when you share and we get hints and clues, so my plan is working.
  7. Wen accused Jamie of being a coward and a leaver, and anyone that is caught up in Jamie could be affected. Unless Jamie was a soldier and he ran away leaving all his fellow soldiers to die a horrible death, being a coward doesn't mean anything. And what is a leaver? Jamie was in a bad relationship with Wen and decided to leave to get away? That doesn't make sense. If Jamie comes from a well known musical family, how does being a coward or a leaver translate. I think when we find out, we'll find that Laura did not leave us any clues as to the true nature of Jamie, she has been keeping all information close to her vest and using her masterful sense of character, narrative, and the allure of Cottontail to keep us in the dark. We basically found out that Cottontail was John Smith for sure only when Laura told us in the comments. No, she has something else planned and methinks we won't be able to puzzle it out because she had kept us distracted with her use of story to offer us up a wow moment. I haven't read another author in many a year boys and girls that has kept me so entertained by giving me nothing in a long time. We have 14 more chapters to go, and I'm so down to read each one looking for clues I am certain she has not left for us to puzzle out. That takes restraint, someone who is confident in her skills as a writer to resist the urge to give clues, and telegraph her true intentions. I think she is going to rely on her copious skill to keep us glued to her every update. Dare i say, she is one of the best authors on this site, I dared. Prove me wrong.
  8. Billy would make a good D'Artagnon, he's blond, every since Chris O'Donald played him in that one movie, my D'Artagnon's have always been blond in my head.
  9. Season Three was the season I felt the writers started getting a handle on what they were doing. Yes they played loose with the cannon but they got the mix of drama, intrigue, and action down and for the first time since episode one season one, I felt emotion. We got to see the battle Ajah in all their glory in the Two Rivers, we got to see Aiel and their history, we got a bunch of badass fights in the white tower, if they would have come out of the gate this focused instead of the jumbled mess the first two season were, I think they would have a season four coming. But it was too little to late. THE SHOW HAS BEEN CANCELLED Season two killed off what was left of the good will from the fans. And casual viewers were confused by so many characters and unrelated episodes. So goodbye Wheel of Time, I wonder how many years it's going to be before we get another attempt at bringing it to life. And if you are part of that team, don't do eight episode seasons, but if you must, have the story focused on a few characters instead of giving us whole episodes in the vein of villain of the week never to be seen again.
  10. I keep going back and forth, I don't think Jamie spurned the Incel, nor do I think it is anything sexual, there might be a mutual friend/lover of Jamie, but there doesn't seem to be any hints to what it could be. For only really having three characters in this story, we aren't given much information, As for Jamie's secret, I'm not so sure it has anything to do with jamie himself, maybe a family secret, but Jamie has said many times in the narrative that he's not ashamed of anything he's done in his past, but since he changed his name, it might be logical to believe his troubles are more from an outside source, like family. The author has built up a great mystery and I'm anxious to find out what it is. I hope it can live up to the masterful way it was created.
  11. very astute observation I must say.
  12. I tried to talk her out of using it but you know laura,
  13. While @Laura S. Fox and I were enjoying s'mores last weekend while camping in Yosemite National Park, we had a rather long discussion about Jamie's backstory. Jaime at one time was part of a traveling circus family. His real name is Jamie Von Strap of the Georgia Straps out of Boston. His attraction was playing the drums while doing the high wire without a safety harness. One night when he was playing in Lisbon to a sold out arena, the silver bullet outside of Los Angles came roaring by just as he went into his famous solo while wearing a sweater with a zipper down the back, the zipper was caught in the passing train and he was jerked out of the circus and didn't stop until the train did outside of Florida off the coast of Africa. Jamie settled down in the mountains of Tibet while teaching scuba diving lessons to wayward children for drumsticks. He settled down in the small village and took an apartment on the seventeen floor. There he fell in love with an amazing girl named Dave. They spent many a year together and as lovers do, they became pregnant. On the eve of the birth of his son, Jamie was once again whisked away, this time by an out of control mining cart. He never saw his wife, Dave, or his son, Jessica again. Wencel the Incel has video proof of Jamie abandoning his family and will show the pictures to everyone with a view master.
  14. So I didn't understand the rules of this game, I was trying to throw suspicion off @Thirdly so when we guessed, I would have it right. But it's whoever guesses correctly first. Everyone knew it was @Thirdly, the only person that would ever mention me, that's a no brainer. Good job @BendtedWreath
  15. Not sure if I'm feeling the theme, kind along the same lines as last year. And I'm hip deep in re-writes so I doubt I'll have the time to participate this year. I'll give everyone a break.
  16. Can't wait to read them.
  17. Jason Rimbaud

    Roadkill

    So I don't recall, maybe one of you kind tail lovers will remember... When did Wencel The Incel see Cottontail as a furry? I can't remember, but maybe outside the club, or did the incel see it online when Jamie did his sexy livestream. Jamie is asked to go on tour, as a what? He doesn't have a band, I'm a bit confused on what he could possibly do on tour that anyone would want to see him. The show's been online for what, two weeks? Jamie is dumber than I thought if he's like, yeah, I'll go on tour without an act. Maybe he should invite Cottontail along to spin him around on his drumstick...Just a thought and if @Laura S. Fox uses it, I can get all the royalties from it...maybe I'm Wencel the Incel.
  18. challenge thrown your way. 😝
  19. Jason Rimbaud

    Epilogue

    Honestly, this story was kind of a mess for me. When I got to the end, my very first thought I had in my tiny head, this seemed like an outline more than a completed story. We were never told how Seeon's people manage to survive multiple years of war with the more advanced (i can't even be bothered to go and check the proper name of Mika's country/race) Mika's people. Mika's people did not seem to need a marriage to stop hostilities, they were more advanced and seemingly capable of wiping out Seeon's backward country at whim. They could go to space, and they were worried about a culture who inserted butt plugs to check for virginity. (Very cool idea by the way, I loved that part) This story never felt lived in, we are told things but rarely are shown things happening. The characters were hard to follow and I never really got a sense why Mika was immediately attached to Seeon, they didn't even have conflict, Mika was mad the night before, shouting at his mother and the next day, he's like take the butt plug out so you can eat and we can talk. Neither's culture was ever really explored and fleshed out. And Seeon had zero character arc. He was the same exact girl from chapter one until the prologue.
  20. I just read this story based on the above review. Which was well written, intriguing, and offered a delightful tale where I'd feel sad, disgusted, hopeful, happy and everything in between. I wish the story I just read matched the review. Read the review, it's better.
  21. I figured you'd like that scene. And as we discussed before, that intimacy was earned, the further along they go the more their dynamic will change as they grow in the relationship. Damn, i knew I had a plan...🤪😊
  22. I'm not sure which response I liked better, the first or edited one. I won't reference anything you wrote in the first response as you since have edited it, but it was nice to get a peak into the person behind the words. So a few weeks or months ago, I was reading a story called Liar V Liar, and I also was growing frustrated when the author wasn't telling the story I was writing in my head. It was only until I let my baggage go and embraced what that author was doing, did I truly appreciate what she was sharing. I love this story now, and it's nothing like the version I have in my head. PS: Her's is better. Brandon is awkward in social situations, he has a hard time self censoring, he is not a poet, he is a painter, someone who observes and rarely gets involved with his subject. Tyler tends to barrel ahead, content to confront things more or less head on. And at its core, this story is not a romance story, I wish I could tell you but that comes in Part Two. As I said earlier, this is just a prelude to the actual story. The only thing I would like to clarify, I did not say I never had an emotional connection during sex, I said rarely. I've had exactly three people where I was emotionally connected via sex. The first one was named, Jason, the second Konstantin, and the last and final one, my current husband of almost eight years. I was and am in husbands case, extremely connected emotionally. I won't go into numbers of how many people I did not enjoy emotional connection with, it would sound like I was bragging. And that would probably be accurate. And if you were in San Francisco, I think you would be one of the few people I'd want to meet in real life. Nothing you said was even close to be offensive so my reply was in kind. Though even if you were offensive, I probably would have replied in the same manner. I know who I am and where my writing expertise is, and I do think I left out certain things that could have added spice to the sex scenes and probably will try to incorporate those things moving forward. But in the six stories I have completed, I think all the sex is always more raw and physical, some even semi-violent. All I ask, you keep inserting your ghosts into your comments, the only way I learn is by looking at things from a different point of view. Thank you for sharing with me and I hope you continue on Tyler's journey in Part Two.
  23. You have a very vivid way of writing prose.
  24. I love your comments, I kind of already addressed them in Chapter Eight, all I can say is keep them coming. J
  25. Let's start off by saying I do agree with the above statement I quoted. And I understand what you were desiring and wishing to have read. And I get the motivations behind it. So I did not take offense. Actually this opens up a chance for us to examine the actual nuts and bolts of the writing. So this might be my favorite comment thus far. I will answer you with two responses. The first response will be the explanation I honestly think. And the second response will be examining the characters motivations and the reason the scene was written in this way. And yes, the second response is a rationalization after the fact and was not in any way what I was thinking upon first writing the scene in question. Response One: Some might say that a reason is just an excuse in disguise. But honestly, this was my first attempt at writing a sex scene and I truly think I suck at writing them. Yes. I know the words and I understand the correct appendages and those functions. But since I've always viewed sex as strictly physical and out of the, lots of people I've made the "O" face with over the years, I rarely felt an emotional connection. I never understood the concept of saving your virginity because it was something special. Mine was taken from me and even with the fucked up repercussions that entailed, I still say good riddance. Sex isn't sacred, it's a natural function of the human body and should be shared freely with everyone who wants to experience it. Response Two: While Tyler had plenty of sex before Brandon, this was his first time exploring his attraction with a male. The reason it was mechanical, why there wasn't fireworks shooting off in the background, there was no established intimacy yet between the two boys. You might not be there yet in regards to this story, but this lack of emotional connection is explored in chapter 16 and chapter 17, at least around the edges in a conversation Tyler has with someone. If I knew you were at that point, I would go into more detail Tyler was experiencing his first time, his first time bottoming, and he treats it like a chore almost, he's determined to do this no matter what. So of course there is no emotional connection, he's stuffing a dick up his ass and he needs to concentrate. And I don't think two people can have that connection the first time they engage in sex. That type of intimacy comes with emotional connection as well as the physical. Emotional connection takes time, sharing of ones self outside of making the "O" face. Brandon and Tyler might never get to that point you are craving. , the part you enjoy. I don't share that point of view, the long looks, hesitant touching, those things I don't find interesting to read or write about. I love foreplay but I don't find those things to be foreplay. The truth is, I'm not good at writing sex scenes and the things you mentioned, never occurred to me to include them. But thank you for your comments, I love the way you express yourself. Just from your comments, I would have guessed that those scenes would be lacking for you. In one of my favorite shows, 'Allo 'Allo, there is a character that you reminded me as you both express yourself in the same manner.
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