dboggs9700
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Everything posted by dboggs9700
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Good chapter but there are a lot of repeated dialogue and paragraphs after Sam and Johnny get home, example “After Krakatoa,” I said, “let’s disappear. Somewhere with water. Somewhere quiet. Just us.”
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Great story! On to book two. Thank you.
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Chapter Six - Julian's POV
dboggs9700 commented on mastershakeme's story chapter in Chapter Six - Julian's POV
Julian passed the Grace test. She trusted him with the most special thing she owns. I expected Ben to have feelings for Julian first, not the other way around. I hope the company can only extract data from Julian and not be able to attempt to control his feelings. Great chapter!- 12 comments
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I have seen Jesse's trust growth since the story began. Maybe I should have said that Jesse still doesn't believe he deserves personal pleasure but feels he must give pleasure. I know that is because of Jesse's upbringing and history. Maybe self-worth instead of trust is how I should have worded it.
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I hope Jesse will one day trust Hank instead of acting like a skittish colt towards him. Jesse is so used to being abused and never allowed to enjoy he cannot accept Hank's loving gestures.
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I just completed the story, and I loved your characters and plot. Great story telling @jkwsquirrel. Now I am going to begin reading your W.A.R. series. I must also thank @weinerdog for recommending your stories @jkwsquirrel.
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Chapter Three - Ben's POV
dboggs9700 commented on mastershakeme's story chapter in Chapter Three - Ben's POV
I love your take on this story and AI. Normally I would not read a story involving AI, but this story got my interest right away. -
Chapter Three - Ben's POV
dboggs9700 commented on mastershakeme's story chapter in Chapter Three - Ben's POV
I am hoping Julian will force Ben to see that most of his family are just users and have taken total advantage of him being a good guy. His devotion to his useless family cost Ben his last relationship. Of course, this does not include Vera or Sophia. -
Great chapter @Mark Ponyboy Peters. So enjoyable seeing Levi adjusting to so many things that are new to him. Really good to see him giving Casey a chance, while still being cautious. Casey's openness regarding himself and his reputation makes me want to trust him guardedly.
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Chapter Five - Ben's POV
dboggs9700 commented on mastershakeme's story chapter in Chapter Five - Ben's POV
I liked getting background on Mason, maybe Julian can deal better with him knowing that grief could be a factor in how Mason is. Perhaps Julian can help him overcome it. I did enjoy that Julian did not back down on switching seats and Mason acting like a ten-year-old. -
Does Theo really understand what 'true to your heart' means? Hopefully he is running the right way.
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I have to be honest; I have not read Lightbringer. I will when you issue the revision and new books. Were you in Berlin for Pride? I thought about you when I saw the story about the van for some reason.
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There was such a playfulness in Big Paws. It was like you were having fun and definitely enjoying writing it. I really like reading Pigsty, but it has never felt like you're into it like you were with Big Paws.
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Are you just trying to stir the pot? I hope you are planning a sequel to follow your classic Big Paws. Big Fangs does make a good title for it.
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Mantown, Part Three of Three
dboggs9700 commented on Boy Mercury X's story chapter in Mantown, Part Three of Three
Clever story and Jesse has such a creative mind and is a lovable guy. This is truly an "expect the unexpected" type of story.- 11 comments
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Chapter Four - Julian's POV
dboggs9700 commented on mastershakeme's story chapter in Chapter Four - Julian's POV
Interesting comment, guess we will wait and see exactly what it means. I kept expecting Julian to grab Ben's crotch to see if he had any balls. -
Once I looked up QRF things made a little more sense. Wonder exactly what they are headed into? The letter from Ken said very little but seemed to hit Kent emotionally.
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Chapter 15 ~ ‘Breach of Peace’ ~
dboggs9700 commented on Vcs's story chapter in Chapter 15 ~ ‘Breach of Peace’ ~
I assume Matt and Reed are together, and Dixie Mae is there to give her opinion on the matter What is in the pack? -
Thank you for your great informative replies when you quote me. I am open to learning especially in areas I really lack knowledge (the military and war). The comment you made to me regarding training in the last chapter I especially appreciated. Thank you!
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Thank you for the welcomed advice. I've read two chapters of Strings, and I already know I will read everything @jkwsquirrel has written over the next week or two.
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Good start, interesting characters. I am going to binge read Strings now to catch up.
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Mantown, Part Two of Three
dboggs9700 commented on Boy Mercury X's story chapter in Mantown, Part Two of Three
Jesse really deserves to be with someone like Terrell. I hope this is not a onetime deal for either of them. Lyssa treats Jesse like shit and takes him for granted. He deserves more. Can't wait to see how you end things tomorrow. As always great characters and story. -
Chapter Three - Ben's POV
dboggs9700 commented on mastershakeme's story chapter in Chapter Three - Ben's POV
100% agree! Guessing Mason will be the worst since he has the mother as backup and always wants money. Why does Ben have Mason's mail? -
Chapter Three - Ben's POV
dboggs9700 commented on mastershakeme's story chapter in Chapter Three - Ben's POV
I am excited for Julian to arrive. Ben seems like such a good guy although he overthinks everything and is a doormat for his family. Hopefully Vera and Sophie will be around after Julian arrives and give Julian more particulars on Ben's life. -
Mantown, Part One of Three
dboggs9700 commented on Boy Mercury X's story chapter in Mantown, Part One of Three
“All wars are about resources, Jesse,” she continued, swirling the red wine in her glass. She wasn't angry. If anything, she looked slightly bored by his existential crisis. “Land, oil, or in this case, sex. If you men could just fuck each other, you wouldn’t need my resource.” Great start! You have so many great quotes in this chapter. I chose this one because it just shows she doesn't give a fuck about Jesse being happy, it's all about her happiness. Excited to see where you are taking us in part two and three.
