paya

This was a really interesting year. Last year, just right before Christmas, I told my sister that she might not have a sister-in-law but a brother-in law... After Christmas I told my Mum as well. Since then the number of people I came out to expanded to nice round 10. These people form sort of my "inner circle", some gyrate closer to me, some further, but they are nevertheless my close friends. How was a year out? I tried to come with one adjective - the most appropriate would be "eye-opening". I slightly touched the local gay "pop-culture", the "meat market", I even spent a night in a hotel owned by gays and I saw their darkroom . I found out that there are many gays in the city, and I got to realize that they are all the same as "straight" people. Maybe more vain. But I can't be so negative. Everyone knows that I met here the love of my life, my SUPERLATIVE boyfriend about whom I tend to brag endlessly, so I have to control myself. Moreover, he's coming over tomorrow and he will be mine for almost two weeks! That's almost an eternity in a long-distance relationship. Apart of my personal life, I also found my first real job, considered quitting my Ph.D. and then reconsidered, met new people and expanded my horizons towards economy and accounting and I already have plans for future development... shortly it was not only one year out, but also one year in the middle of work, school, travel and LOVE I wish all of you who read this blog MERRY CHRISTMAS and a happy, successful, loving and placid new year 2011. Hopefully the new decade will bring us more happiness than the last one.

Makes me think of an old French chanson by Charles Aznavour... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=okXt33o40MQ My mum and I we live alone A great apartment is our home In fairhome towers I have to keep me company Two cats, a dog, a parakeet Some plants and flowers I help my mother with the chores I wash, she dries, I do the floors We work together I shop and cook and sew a bit Though mum does too I must admit I do it better At night I work in a strange bar Impersonating every star I'm quite deceiving The customers come in with doubt And wonder what I'm all about But leave believing I do a very special show Where I am nude from head to toe After stripteasing Each night the men look so surprised I change my sex before their eyes Tell me if you can What makes a man a man Round 3 o'clock or so I meet With friends to have a bite to eat And conversation We talk and empty out our hearts On every subject from the arts To liberation We love to pull apart someone And spread some gossip just for fun Or start a rumour We let our hair down, so to speak And mock ourselves with tongue-in-cheek And inside humour So many times we have to pay For having fun and being gay It's not amusing There's always those who spoil our games By finding fault and calling names Always accusing They draw attention to themselves At the expense of someone else It's so confusing Yet they make fun of how I talk And imitate the way I walk Tell me if you can What makes a man a man My masquerade comes to an end And I go home to bed again Alone and friendless I close my eyes and think of him And fantasize what might have been My dreams are endless We love each other but it seems The love lives only in my dreams It's so one-sided But in this life I must confess The search for love and happiness Is unrequited I ask myself what have I got And what I am and what I'm not What am I giving The answers come from those who make The rules that some of us must break Just to keep living I know my life is not a crime I'm just a victim of my time I stand defenceless Nobody has the right to be The judge of what is right for me Tell me if you can What makes a man a man...

Our faculty magazine made a big survey where they handed out anonymous questionnaires about sex. Among other numbers, it showed that 10 % of the political science students admitted homosexual orientation and 14 % from the department of international relations stated they were bisexual. Other departments (sociology, psychology, journalism, etc.) will have similar numbers I guess. I thought the numbers were interesting so I wanted to share Of course, we are a school of social science, so there might be higher possibility of LGBT students but personally I think it's more the case that they are more in peace with their sexuality than let's say technical schools where you have to be all macho to show off. (Which pretty much sucks because can you imagine all those sexy guys at technical schools pretending they are straight, waiting for somebody to show them they're not? )

Matt is right with the LDR. Me and West are some 1100 miles apart - so even driving to meet each other isn't possible. But we see each other on a daily basis - or almost daily - on the instant messenger and we fly over to meet once in 30-45 days. Sometimes it's very hard but so far it's worked. And we have a date in the future where we are going to be together. It's not a concrete date yet but it's real and close enough to hold on. The other thing is, LDR need willingness on both sides - but I guess that's necessary for any long-term relationship to work. As for SAD, I think he should seek professional help - but if he doesn't want to, I don't see many positive prospects...

This is easily said. Just say no. NO. Try training that in front of the mirror. NO. You can add "I'M not interested." "I don't need it." Try to neg everything they say. If they say you earn more money, say you don't need more. If they say you will earn them fast, say that you're ok with current speed. Don't oppose, just give them a clear signal that you're not interested. Just SAY NO.

OMG what did they do to Alec Baldwin? :-o this video is making me really watch my weight or try to keep it lower... otherwise it's a pretty corny commercial - but that's just because I don't know the shop and the people, so bear with me

You meant alcoholic, alcoholic-alcoholic and... alcoholic? I live in the Czech Republic, though my ancestors came here from Germany, sometimes in the Medieval Ages when the borderlands were being settled. That's my Dad's side. My Mum's side is Hungarian, but from Southern Slovakia (huge minority there) and whatever streaks they had in their blood, IDK See - not only the US are a melting pot, the Central Europe is too! (I have a friend who is Czech but has roots in Slovenia, Slovakia, Poland and Germany or Austria, not sure now... )

Happy birthday!

The biggest change in my life needed one thing: gather enough courage to live my life in truth. Once I admitted to myself that it's OK to be gay, I live much more content life than ever before. Since you've entered my life - or better said since I've invaded yours

Well in 2012 there's Olympics AND Diamond Anniversary of the Rule of Elisabeth II, so there's plenty to celebrate - and attract tourists Moreover all that garbage with pics of William and Kate that will emergy - and is ready for some time, just waiting for the date - will bring some money in as well. How much it will cost? IDK but there's plenty of people who are trying to count it already... but I haven't read those articles.

Our newspapers quote an organization called "VisitBritain" that claims that the Royal Family brings to the UK 500 million pounds on tourism. And they expect the wedding to make it even higher. That doesn't sound that bad, huh?

Personality. THROBBING. Right. Yeah That really is what matters. My point of view... well, everybody here is saying that in general looks matter, mainly because our society is judgmental and the first impressions we get is the looks. Though if you ever had/have a boyfriend, was/is the looks what you look for? I've already seen some answers here. It took me some time to develop but my personal criterion is: "Could you imagine spending the rest of your life with this person? Could you imagine you'd get old side by side with him/her?" And I hadn't stopped until I found a person because of whom I could answer on both questions YES. P.S. Everyone has inside at least a little grain of self-consciousness. During my quest for the love of my life, I happened to find out that GAYS ARE really VERY SHALLOW. I'm not talking about anybody in particular, it's a generalization I got to make on my personal experience. I have never considered myself as handsome nor sexy. Though unlike the shallow ones I've met, I found a man for whom I'm the sexiest person in the world. I think that's a WIN for me

he looks more and more like his father...

well the problem will be coordination - how can you get all those people in one time at one place - to a msn chat? I think FB event is much simpler to handle...

Can we pool this topic with the one of Benji? it's just a few links away - called "Brave Kid".

The guy in suit apparently disagrees.

I second that! Moreover I don't think it would be wise to deal with any more details about this event anywhere here in public. Otherwise I'm not sure I'd be willing to come to an open-public event.

awww, what happened with the poor two-year old boy? I can't imagine being 16 and having to take care of a two year old brother...

Long time no read, eh? Well, no news to talk about, really... though... latest developments have forced me to write a new post today. One of the ways how to measure you're old is that you start losing your peers. Instead of meeting in the pub at some get-together you meet at the funerals... Or that at the get-togethers you're not gossiping about those who didn't come because as we say "only good about the deceased".

I was never into drugs, in all my life I had a few joints of weed and that's it. All these blogs and comments just make me feel so grateful I didn't try any of the rough stuff. Thank you guys for all your memories! It's just too sad it doesn't get as a reading to the eyes that should read this at school. Even in our small sleepy town, my hometown, there are drugs. Plenty of them. My sister just lost a guy she went to a class with - he's told to OD on heroin... The world just lost another smart 18-year old guy who had too much time and many bad friends...

Notice there's guy on guy action too

do I really see DragonFire? Welcome BACK!!! It's nice to see you after such a long time!

Dargon, you HOTTIE! Now show us some with better lighting!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY Owl!!!

Did it make you to change your life style though?