-- Chapter 9 --

As they drove down off the mountain, drawing closer to the lights of the town with each bend in the windy Lookout Road, Levi mostly stayed quiet, though occasionally Matt caught him studying him carefully, as if he was seeing him in an entirely new light. Trying to work him out.

He hoped that wasn’t a bad thing.

When they made it back to the house there were questions, of course, about where they had been for the afternoon, but Matt just answered with, ‘Just spending some guy time together.’

That seemed to satisfy the curiosity of his parents. At least for now. Luke, on the other hand, just gave a knowing nod. He’d already been filled in earlier as to what Matt’s plans were.

Dinner that night was a comfortable family affair, with Levi surprising everyone by asking if he could say grace before they began. It wasn’t a habit that had ever been a part of life in the Parsons’ household, but Matt quickly said yes, before anyone could object, much to his parent’s surprise.

Levi looked at him, and offered a tiny smile, then bowed his head, hands folded tightly in his lap, and with his voice steady, but thick with emotion, began.

‘Dear God.

‘Thank You for this food tonight, and for every good thing on this table. But mostly . . . thank You for bringing my family to me.

‘Thank You for my mother, and for everything she taught me. Thank You for my father, for his being revealed to me and accepting me as his son. Thank You for my grandparents, who opened their hearts and their home to me.

‘I didn’t know if love would ever find me again after my mother left . . . but now I have a family again. You gave them to me. You really did. You showed me that love wins – and it has brought me home.

‘Please bless this food, bless every person sitting here, and help me never take this for granted. Help me be a good son and a good grandson.

‘Oh, and thank You for Luke . . . for showing me that it would take time to understand everything.

‘In Jesus’ name, Amen.’

When he had finished, he opened his eyes and looked up, to find everyone looking at him, with varying expressions of surprise and love on display. His grandmother wiped away a tear, and then reached a hand out for Levi’s.

‘That was truly lovely, Levi. Thank you,’ she said, her voice sounding slightly shaky.

He gave a little nod, then turned towards his father.

‘Not really something we’re used to around here, mate. But thank you for that,’ Matt offered.

‘Thank you for letting me,’ Levi replied.

The remainder of the meal passed in relative quiet, as they all enjoyed the homemade Shepherd’s Pie made by Matt’s mother, but as they finished the talk started again, with Levi cautiously asking what Thompsonville was really like.

Matt and Luke exchanged a look. Was this the first sign of Levi beginning to think about a future move to their adopted home town?

It was Luke who did most of the talking.

‘We fell in love with the place on our Schoolies break,’ Luke said.

‘So . . . was that at the end of your last school year, after you and mum broke up?’ Levi asked Matt directly. There was nothing accusatory or challenging in the way he said it, it was just acknowledging a fact.

‘Yes, mate.’

Levi nodded in understanding, before Luke continued.

‘When I got into university just down the road at Macquarie Harbour, it seemed the perfect place for us to live . . . and as some of our other friends also got into uni there, we all ended up living together.’

‘Are they also . . .’

‘Yes, mate,’ Matt answered. ‘And we all still live together in the same house. We ended up buying it together.’

There was no further mention of the house, or their housemates, as Luke continued. He told stories about Thompsonville. About the beaches and the lake and the harbour. About the beauty of the place. About the carefree lifestyle that everyone lives. About tourists, surfers, and even the local celebrity – the author Tony Scott – who they counted amongst their friends, as he was a relative of Luke’s.

Even Matt Snr. seemed to relax while listening to him.

Levi seemed genuinely interested in the town, which gave Matt some hope that he was softening his stance about possibly having to move there to live with them. He decided that he wasn’t going to push the point however, he would let Levi bring it up again, if and when he was ready.

* * *

After the table had been cleared, Matt’s parents settled in to watch a movie, while the guys finished cleaning up the kitchen. As Levi and Matt dried dishes, Luke said he was heading back down to the flat. Matt said he would be there shortly, and Luke nodded, then said goodnight to everyone, before heading out the back door.

Matt noticed Levi watching him closely as he left.

‘You okay, bud?’ he asked.

‘What? Oh, yeah, I guess I’m still just trying to get my head around everything.’

‘If you want to talk about it, you only have to ask.’

Levi cocked his head half-sideways. ‘Can I . . . can I come down to the flat when we’re finished here,’ he asked, so quietly that Matt thought he might have misheard the question.

‘Of course,’ he answered, to which Levi just gave a nod.

A short time later they were walking down the path that led to the flat, where they soon found Luke sitting on the bed with his laptop on his knees while typing away, and headphones on. He looked up when they reached the doorway, then pulled the headphones off.

‘Hey,’ he said to Matt and Levi. ‘To what do we owe this pleasure?’ he asked.

‘Levi wants to know how the other half lives,’ Matt answered. ‘You want a cuppa? I’m going to put the kettle on.’

‘Yeah, sounds good,’ Luke replied, while watching Levi studying his surroundings.

‘How about you, Levi? Tea or coffee or Coca-Cola?’

‘No, thanks. I’m fine.’

Luke put his laptop down, then scooted around and put his feet on the floor, before motioning towards a comfortable armchair that sat in one corner of the room.

‘You may as well make yourself at home,’ Luke suggested, so Levi gave a little nod and sat on the chair, leaning forward slightly, his hands clasped together between his knees.

Levi looked around, somewhat nervously. He remembered how he had seen their bed that morning, all unmade with sheets and blankets askew.

A few moments later, Matt came into the room carrying two mugs, then after handing one to Luke, he sat down beside him.

‘You look like you’ve got something on your mind again, Levi,’ Matt remarked.

‘Yeah, maybe.’

‘Which is?’

‘Until this morning, I think . . . I think I had trouble understanding that . . . you two really are . . . I mean, you are actually together together?’ Levi asked.

‘When you saw the bed?’ Luke asked.

‘Yeah.’

‘Huh?’ Matt asked.

‘I think, babe, that what Levi is saying is that it wasn’t until he saw our unmade bed here, this morning, that it hadn’t really sunk in that we were . . . a couple.’

Matt looked from Levi, to Luke, and back again.

‘So that’s what led to today’s discussion?’

Levi shifted awkwardly.

‘Yeah. I’m sorry, I guess that I’ve been a bit overwhelmed by everything that has happened recently and was struggling to put all the pieces together.’

It wasn’t apologetic, or hostile, it was just uncertainty. Just honesty.

‘No need to be sorry, Levi.’

Luke kept his tone easy.

‘So, what? You’re worried we’ll make you watch musicals or something now?’

That finally earned a reluctant snort from Levi. Matt relaxed slightly.

After a long moment, Levi spoke again.

‘I just wanted to know, I mean, what’s it like? You know, living together? I’ve been watching you both, and it seems like it’s kind of like, I don’t know, normal for the two of you.’

Matt raised an eyebrow, somewhat surprised by the observation and also the curiosity, instead of . . . what? Accusation?

‘I’m just trying to understand . . . is it, you know, different . . .’

‘Well, for us, it is normal, mate. It’s no different at all to a man and a woman living together,’ Matt said. ‘Or are you asking about sex, mate? I’m not sure I’m ready for that conversation just yet.’

‘What!’ Levi cried. ‘No, not that . . . I’m just, I dunno, confused, I guess. After being told for so long that it was so wrong, I’m just not sure why it’s supposed to be so . . . bad.’

‘I think it would take all night to go over the reasons why civilisation has looked down at homosexuality over the past two thousand years, and even then, we wouldn’t have a definitive answer,’ Luke responded. ‘The way we look at it, though, is that it’s just love, Levi. As simple as that. Try and think of it like this . . . what if it’s not the gender of the person we become attracted to, but the person themselves, whether they happen to be the same sex as us, or the opposite sex?’

Levi nodded.

Matt thought for a second, then added, ‘Our relationship is just . . . normal, mostly. We argue about who left the dishes in the sink. We cook together on weekends — he’s terrible at pasta, but I pretend it’s good. We go for walks. We watch stupid movies. We mix with friends who are just like us. When I’ve had a bad day, he’s the person I want to tell. Same as any couple, I think. The love part . . . it’s just love. It’s not some big statement. It’s not rebellion. It’s just wanting to build a life with someone who gets you.’

Levi processed this, biting the inside of his cheek. It didn’t match all the warnings he’d heard – the debauchery, the images of parties and judgment and emptiness. There was none of that.

It sounds . . . lonely not to have that, regardless of who it might be with, a small voice inside Levi whispered. And immediately he felt guilty for thinking it.

* * *

Later, after Levi had gone to bed, Matt and Luke spoke until deep into the night.

‘He’s uncomfortable,’ Luke suggested.

Matt shook his head. ‘He was uncomfortable . . . but I think he’s getting it. He’s fifteen. And he’s questioning . . . which is exactly what I wanted him to do.’

‘What do you mean by that?’

‘I told him I didn’t want to straight up tell him that everything he’s been taught by his mother and grandfather was wrong . . . I told him I wanted him to question things and make up his own mind.’

Luke nodded slowly. ‘Good idea. Then it doesn’t mean they’re somebody else’s beliefs. Wherever he lands on any issue will be his own belief then.’

‘That’s the plan,’ Matt replied, even if there was still an element of uncertainty that lingered.

* * *

The return to Thompsonville was set for the following weekend, with both Matt and Luke needing to return so they could check in with their jobs. Everyone thought that it would be a good chance for Levi to accompany them so that he could take a look around the small town and experience what it had to offer, and while Levi himself had been the one who had asked if he could travel with them, the thought of the trip wasn’t without some trepidation on his part.

After saying goodbye to Matt’s parents, the three of them set off on their journey early on Saturday morning, but not before making a quick visit to the cemetery, in order for Levi to say goodbye to his mother and place some flowers on her grave.

Matt and Luke stood back while Levi knelt by the pile of dirt with a simple white cross at the head of it, which seemed to gradually be settling. In time there would be a border and a gravestone to mark Julie’s resting place, but for now things were still simple, and raw.

As Levi finally walked back towards his father and Matt, they noticed him use the sleeve of his sweatshirt to wipe his eyes and when he stopped beside Matt, he gave a little sniff.

Matt placed an arm around the boy’s shoulders and gave a gentle squeeze, wanting to offer just a small sign of support, but he wasn’t quite prepared for what happened next, as Levi leaned into him for the first time and wrapped his arms around his father, while sobbing quietly against his chest.

It didn’t last long, but it was definitely a moment between father and son, and when Levi eventually pulled back and looked up into Matt’s eyes, which were filled with nothing but compassion, he knew that he had made the right decision to let Matt and Luke into his life.

‘Thank you,’ he said quietly.

Matt just smiled, and then kissed the side of Levi’s head.

‘No thanks needed, mate.’

After that, the long drive down to Thompsonville felt like crossing into another world, for Levi.

He sat in the back seat, forehead pressed against the cool glass, as the scenery changed. First came the dusty farmland that surrounded his hometown, before the highway wound its way through the mountains, giving way to tall eucalypts and then rolling green hills and wide-open farmland, dotted with cattle and windmills. Before long the land flattened, and the air grew heavier, carrying a strange new scent – salt and something fresher, something more alive.

By the time they had almost reached the coastal plains, the sky had opened up into a vast, bright blue. Levi’s eyes widened as the first glimpse of the distant ocean appeared between hills – a shimmering, endless stretch of deep-blue water meeting the sky.

Levi watched with curiosity when they turned onto another road and left the main highway, then climbed over a low range, before dropping back down onto the flood plains. He ticked off each of the kilometre signs.

T – for Thompsonville, of course – 15

T – 10

T – 5

And soon enough, he could see the town appearing ahead of them; small farms, old houses, purple Jacaranda trees. The place looked like it had stepped right out of the nineteen fifties . . . not that Levi even knew what the nineteen fifties looked like. He was just guessing.

He couldn’t quite understand why he was feeling so excited. Maybe it was the fact that he had not been out of his hometown in the ten years in which he had lived there, then as soon as that thought had passed, he found himself feeling guilty, conflicted.

Mum did the best she could, he thought.

As they approached a sign that pointed off to the left – Beachside Lane – the car slowed.

‘We live down that road,’ Luke said to him, as he turned in his seat and looked back at Levi.

‘We’re not going there first?’ Levi asked when Matt continued on towards the town, rather than turning towards the house.

Matt smiled in the rearview mirror. ‘Nope. Figured we’d show you Thompsonville properly. It’s lunchtime, so unpacking can wait a bit. We’ll head to the boardwalk instead.’

‘Boardwalk?’

‘Yeah, it’s along one side of the lake. Great food stalls, outdoor seating. It’s a nice spot.’

‘Sounds cool,’ Levi replied.

They parked near the old stone courthouse in the centre of town. As soon as Levi stepped out of the car, the warm sea breeze hit him, ruffling his hair. He stood still for a moment, taking it all in, breathing in the sea air.

The main street was lined with old buildings – some beautiful, some not so beautiful. A two-storey brick hotel with a high verandah around the two sides facing streets, and wrought-iron lacework. Rows of shops with their own wide verandahs. A corner store with a full-size advertisement for Bushells tea painted on one side wall. Colourful hanging baskets swinging gently from the awnings of other shops. People moved about at an easy pace, nothing like the quiet stillness of the country town streets he was used to.

‘Wow . . .’ Levi breathed.

Luke grinned. ‘Come on, let’s walk. The lake is this way.’

They wandered down the main street, then turned towards the waterfront. Levi’s steps slowed as the town opened up to reveal its true beauty. A wide, calm lake sat before them, dotted with small boats and black swans gliding across the water. Then beyond where it narrowed at one end, he could see a natural harbour curved protectively around the town, with fishing boats bobbing at their moorings, behind a stone breakwall. He hadn’t seen any golden beaches as yet, but he could hear surf rolling in onto the shore somewhere behind him, and he let his imagination do the rest.

Levi stopped near the edge of the boardwalk, eyes wide with quiet wonder. The salt air filled his lungs. He could hear the distant cry of seagulls and the babble of voices. Everything felt so . . . alive.

‘It’s so beautiful,’ he said softly, almost to himself. ‘I’ve only seen the ocean in pictures. Never thought it would look like this.’

Matt put a gentle hand on his shoulder. ‘If you’ll let it, this can be your home now, mate. All of it.’

Levi turned and gazed into the eyes of the man who was now his only living relative.

As they walked slowly along the boardwalk, Levi kept turning his head, trying to take everything in. The fish-and-chip stalls with their bright red umbrellas, the coffee shops, the old timber jetty reaching out into the lake, the way the sunlight danced on the water. For a boy who had spent most of his life in a town surrounded by dusty inland farms and quiet country roads, it felt like stepping into a storybook.

At one point he stopped, closed his eyes for a second, and just breathed it all in. When he opened them again, there was a small, awed smile on his face.

‘I only ever imagined that God made places like this,’ he said quietly. ‘But I never imagined standing in the middle of it. It’s almost like He . . . like He saved the best bits for down here by the sea.’

Luke glanced at Matt, both of them were smiling.

‘Ready for some lunch now, kiddo?’ Luke asked.

Levi nodded, still looking out at the lake, like he was afraid it might disappear if he blinked too long.

‘Yeah,’ he said. ‘But can we come back here after?’

‘Of course,’ Matt replied.

To be continued . . .