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    Mikiesboy
  • Mikiesboy
  • Author
  • 04/15/2019
  • 138 Words
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  • 16 Comments
Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

tim's poetry workbook - 4. Metre Prompt - Sweet Alligator

For the Metre prompt from @AC Benus Zero to Hero Guide

I used the Prompt you can find here

So after a lot of figuring it out here is my 'road map':

 

(‘Of old,’)( spake the priest;)( spake the par-son)( and prea-cher) – 12

(‘Af-ter death,)( O my Friends,)( af-ter death)( is E-ter-ni-ty.)’ 14

(‘Not so,’|)( cries my Spi-rit,)( ‘not so,)( O wise tea-cher)! 12

(It was), (and it is),(and it e-ver)( shall be) – 11

(Now, now)( is E-ter-ni-ty!)( Is it)( for thee?)’ 11

 

And my own new poem using the road map:

 

Sweet Alligator

‘It's you that I love,’ said his husband and lover

‘Always you, oh my love, only you, sweet alligator,

you see, you are truly the one who I cherish.’

‘Your kiss and your lips will, for always, be mine

My sweet lil alligator; am I for you?’

~~~

Thanks for your thoughts.
Copyright © 2019 Mikiesboy; All Rights Reserved.
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Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

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Chapter Comments

Brayon

I've found this poem enjoyable, it was a quick read, and I could see some of the imagery you use. Excellent.

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mayday

Lovely. But how did you hit on an alligator? Of all big animals...

Hope they'll see'm later...

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Parker Owens
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Oh, I like this. Alligator is such a great animal and word to have chosen. 

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Mikiesboy
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1 hour ago, mayday said:

Lovely. But how did you hit on an alligator? Of all big animals...

Hope they'll see'm later...

Why alligator? Well, in the original poem is the word Eternity .. 4 syllables.  Since i had to write this poem to complete the exercise, i needed something to write about and i needed a 4 syllable word.  I looked at a list of 4 syllable words. Alligator jumped out at me.  Could it be a term of endearment? Sure, why not.  So, that is why i chose alligator.

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Mikiesboy
6 hours ago, BHopper2 said:

I've found this poem enjoyable, it was a quick read, and I could see some of the imagery you use. Excellent.

Thanks very much, A.  xo

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Mikiesboy
4 hours ago, Backwoods Boy said:

I love the alligator!  It takes a flight of fancy to match an idea to the form.

Thank you. And thanks too for the word suggestion.. it works much better.

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Mikiesboy
7 minutes ago, Parker Owens said:

Oh, I like this. Alligator is such a great animal and word to have chosen. 

Lol.. i'm glad it works. Thank you, Parker.

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AC Benus

I like your breakdown of the Waddington poem! It seems a natural way to parse the soft and hard beats (but of course, everyone could make a roadmap [yep. :) still using that word] that best fit their individual reading; there's no right or wrong). 

As for Alligator, if people were not aware of the prompt origin of this, they'd probably think it's an intriguing term. Yes, term of affection, but there is a hint of danger in the beloved too because of it (like calling a little baby 'My snot bear' lol). But it's a good poem on its own rights. I really enjoyed seeing your reply to this difficult Poetry Prompt Challenge. 

As always, thanks for playing along :yes:

Edited by AC Benus
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Mikiesboy
8 hours ago, AC Benus said:

I like your breakdown of the Waddington poem! It seems a natural way to parse the soft and hard beats (but of course, everyone could make a roadmap [yep. :) still using that word] that best fit their individual reading; there's no right or wrong). 

As for Alligator, if people were not aware of the prompt origin of this, they'd probably think it's an intriguing term. Yes, term of affection, but there is a hint of danger in the beloved too because of it (like calling a little baby 'My snot bear' lol). But it's a good poem on its own rights. I really enjoyed seeing your reply to this difficult Poetry Prompt Challenge. 

As always, thanks for playing along :yes:

Thanks AC ... the first round of prompts we did a few years back, helped with this one. But you introduced new elements here with mapping out the poem. I've never done that before, and so definitely learned something new, interesting and another tool i can use!

Yesss, alligators can be snappish, and they can hurt, so perhaps a semi-dangerous partner in that sense.  I laughed out loud at my little snot bear.. LOL

 

Thanks for the excellent prompts and all you do. muah xo

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Mikiesboy
6 hours ago, MichaelS36 said:

Wonderful and endearing!  I think I'm getting the idea. Great job tim! 

i can help, if needs be, Sir.  :) muahxoxo

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JeffreyL

This is a fun little poem! You did a great job fitting your words to the metre in the example. Thanks.

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Mikiesboy
2 minutes ago, JeffreyL said:

This is a fun little poem! You did a great job fitting your words to the metre in the example. Thanks.

:)  thanks Jeffrey!!   it was fun and weird..LOL

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