2014 Prompt Responses - 20. Chapter 20

“How the hell did a squirrel get inside the house?” I asked incredulously. “And why are you naked?”

Our house looked like a war zone. There were muddy footprints – human, squirrel, and feline – scattered throughout the living room; picture frames, knick-knacks, and books graced the floor instead of shelves; and Steve looked like he was suffering from shell-shock. He was covered in mud, scratches, and grass clippings.

I was sure that whatever my imagination could come up with wouldn’t even come close to the truth.

Steve looked around the demolished living room, then at me, and dissolved into hysterics. I wasn’t sure if I should join in his laughter or call 911.

When Steve calmed down enough to breathe, he took my hand and led me through the sliding glass doors to our backyard. The backyard hadn’t fared much better than the living room. We stood on the deck, surveying the damage.

“Jesus, Steve! Put some clothes on, will ya? The neighbors will see and they already think we’re perverts.” I grabbed a blanket from the ground that was just as muddy as Steve was. He grinned at me and wrapped it loosely around his hips.

Our back lawn was riddled with muddy skid marks. There was an overturned picnic basket near where the blanket had been, and its contents were strewn around the yard.

“Well, hun… I was planning a special surprise for you for tonight. I had everything just about set up, when I noticed the picnic basket moving. I opened the lid and a squirrel ran out! He had the cotton batting from a gift box in his mouth, with your gift hanging from it. I started to chase him, but kept slipping in the mud. The sliding glass doors were open because I was still bringing stuff outside and the squirrel ran into the house. Well, Tabitha saw him and joined in the chase, which resulted in the current state of the living room. Apparently I got in between them at some point.” He pointed to the scratches on his chest and arms. “They ran back outside and I have no idea where they are now.”

“We better clean you up before you get rabies or something.”

We walked back to the living room and I took another good look at it, imagining the scenario that Steve described unfolding before me. I looked at the state of my half-naked boyfriend and started snickering. It didn’t take long for the snickers to turn into full-out hysterics and I doubled over in laughter, struggling to catch my breath.

“You haven’t explained why you’re naked,” I wheezed.

He smirked at me and took my hand, leading me into the kitchen. “Close your eyes.”

I arched an eyebrow at him.

“Trust me, hun.”

I closed my eyes. I opened them when I felt Steve’s hand pressing something into my chest. It was a bouquet of mangled tulips, my favorite flower.

Steve took two glasses of wine from the kitchen counter and held one out to me. “There were originally two blankets.” He smiled at me seductively and raised his glass of wine. “Happy Anniversary to the man I love more than anything else in this world.”