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Sexual and Gender Identities: A glossary

Thorn Wilde

Entry posted by Thorn Wilde

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Our community is so much bigger and more diverse than many of us believe. With a lot of new-ish terms and labels out there detailing identities some may not be aware of, I figured a brief list of definitions might be helpful for someone somewhere.

I shall begin with the four letters everyone knows. If you're here, you already know what these mean, but I'm including them anyway.

 

L: lesbian - a woman who is exclusively attracted to other women

G: gay - a person who is exclusively attracted to people of the same gender or sex; often used to refer specifically to gay men

B: bisexual/bi - a person who is attracted to people of two or more genders (we'll get to the 'or more' later)

T: trans/transgender - people whose gender does not match the sex they were assigned at birth

 

Now for the 'new' letters you often see added on at the end of the acronym these days (LGBTQIA), whose definitions you may be unfamiliar with or a bit fuzzy on.

 

Q: queer - used as an umbrella term for everyone who belongs to a sexual or gender minority (*)
     also: questioning - people questioning their sexuality and/or gender identity in one way or another

I: intersex - people who are born with ambiguous sex characteristics or sex characteristics that don't match their chromosomes. This includes ambiguous genitalia, sex chromosomes other than XX or XY (such as XXY, XYY, or simply X), and androgen insensitivity syndrome, to mention a few. Some people with PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) also consider themselves to be intersex. Many intersex people also identify as transgender.

A: asexual - a person who does not experience sexual attraction toward anyone at all; sometimes also called ace
    also: aromantic - a person who does not experience romantic attraction toward anyone at all; sometimes also called aro 

Some asexual people are also aromantic, but far from all. An asexual person can also be gay, for instance, if they experience romantic attraction towards people of the same gender or sex, even if they have no sexual attraction. The words homoromantic, heteroromantic, biromantic, and panromantic are often used to describe the romantic preferences of asexual people.

 

Now for terms that aren't in the acronym, starting with those related to sexuality:

pansexual - a person who is pansexual is attracted to people regardless of gender. This differs from bisexuality in that, as previously stated, bisexuality is attraction to two or more genders, while for a pansexual person, gender is completely irrelevant to sexual attraction.

omnisexual - a person who is attracted to practically everybody

demisexual - a person who experiences sexual attraction only to people they have a strong emotional connection with

grey asexual - a person who normally does not experience sexual attraction but who may very rarely do so under certain circumstances

 

Gender identities (these words generally exist under the trans umbrella):

non-binary - someone who is non-binary has a gender identity that does not adhere to the binary male/female model of gender; colloquially also called enby, derived from NB

genderfluid - someone whose gender identity shifts on a spectrum between the masculine and the feminine

agender - someone who does not identify with any gender

bi-gender - someone who identifies as both male and female

genderqueer - someone whose gender identity does not adhere to ideas of traditional gender; sometimes used interchangeably with non-binary

 

And a few more gender-related terms:

cisgender - someone whose gender matches the sex they were assigned at birth; anyone who is not trans

AFAB - assigned female at birth

AMAB - assigned male at birth

transman - someone who was assigned female at birth but identifies as male; sometimes referred to as ftm (female-to-male)

transwoman - someone who was assigned male at birth but identifies as female; sometimes referred to as mtf (male-to-female)

trans masculine/trans masc - someone who was assigned female at birth but whose identity lies somewhere in the masculine end of the gender spectrum

trans feminine/trans femme - someone who was assigned male at birth but whose identity lies somewhere in the feminine end of the gender spectrum

gender dysphoria - physical discomfort and mental distress from having a body that does not conform to one's gender (note: not all trans people have gender dysphoria)

gender euphoria - the feeling of joy experienced by trans people when they 'pass' as their gender or feel comfortable in their gender expression

HRT - hormone replacement therapy; causes people assigned male at birth to go through a female puberty where they grow breasts, fat and muscle is redistributed, body hair growth is diminished, and the quality of the skin changes, among other things.

T - testosterone; causes people assigned female at birth to go through a male puberty where their voices drop, they grow more body and facial hair, fat and muscle is redistributed, and the clitoris grows

top surgery - removal of breast tissue in order to create a male-looking chest on a person assigned female at birth

bottom surgery - changing of the genitalia through plastic surgery; for people assigned male at birth, vaginoplasty; for people assigned female at birth, either phalloplasty or metoidioplasty 

 

I hope this has been helpful. A note of caution: the purpose of these terms and labels is not for you to label others, but for everyone to label themselves as they see fit. It is nobody's place to tell anyone else what or who they are. We all have the right to self-identification.

If you're an author and you use some of the less common terms listed here in your stories, feel free to copy the definitions for your author or story notes, or link back to this blog entry, if you're worried that people won't understand them. :) 

 

* I recognise that some people are uncomfortable with the reclaiming of the word queer, which has been used as a homophobic slur for a long time. We who use it in no way mean to cause offence. Its usage within the community has grown over time and is especially useful for people who belong to more than one sexual or gender minority; instead of saying that I am trans, non-binary and bisexual, I can simply say that I'm queer and be done with it.

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Wayne Gray

Thanks for the great reference. 🏳️‍🌈

I’ve personally used: straight, gay, bisexual lesbian, demisexual, gray asexual and trans characters so far. The more the merrier.

Edited by Wayne Gray
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Thorn Wilde
Just now, Wayne Gray said:

Thanks for the great reference. 🏳️‍🌈

I’ve personally used: straight, gay, lesbian, demisexual, gray asexual and trans characters so far. The more the merrier.

Maybe you'll head into non-binary territory one day. ;) 

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Mikiesboy

i hate labels of any sort, i'm not sure they help and are often used against us in hurtful ways

i just care about people

however, i appreciate the effort you have put in here to help bring understanding of all the various terms

queer works.  :)

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Thorn Wilde
2 hours ago, Mikiesboy said:

i hate labels of any sort, i'm not sure they help and are often used against us in hurtful ways

i just care about people

however, i appreciate the effort you have put in here to help bring understanding of all the various terms

queer works.  :)

Labels can certainly be used against people, which is why I make the note of how they should be used for self-identification and not to label others. There are certain parts of our identities that define how we express ourselves, and I think being able to explain that to others can be useful. It can also be useful in order to find community with people we share experiences with. But I digress. Queer certainly works, yeah. :) 

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wenmale64

Thanks for this informative list. I have heard of most of the terms listed, but not exactly known the content referred to.  This cleared up my understanding in a big way. It might even change my defination of myself ;)  In any case I like Tims outlook... Queer definitely works for me also  0:)

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Thorn Wilde
3 hours ago, wenmale64 said:

Thanks for this informative list. I have heard of most of the terms listed, but not exactly known the content referred to.  This cleared up my understanding in a big way. It might even change my defination of myself ;)  In any case I like Tims outlook... Queer definitely works for me also  0:)

I'm glad you found it useful; that's what it's there for. :) 

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Zombie

 

God I hope you’re not going to test us... :unsure2:  :lol: :glomp:
 

————————-

Edit to add

oh no now this :o

 phallosexual (your post on Queerbating) and

quora question “Is there a name for a sexual orientation for people who are attracted to the opposite sex (biological), regardless of gender identity?” https://www.quora.com/Is-there-a-name-for-a-sexual-orientation-for-people-who-are-attracted-to-the-opposite-sex-biological-regardless-of-gender-identity
 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by Zombie
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Thorn Wilde
1 hour ago, Zombie said:

 

God I hope you’re not going to test us... :unsure2:  :lol: :glomp:
 

————————-

Edit to add

oh no now this :o

 phallosexual (your post on Queerbating) and

quora question “Is there a name for a sexual orientation for people who are attracted to the opposite sex (biological), regardless of gender identity?” https://www.quora.com/Is-there-a-name-for-a-sexual-orientation-for-people-who-are-attracted-to-the-opposite-sex-biological-regardless-of-gender-identity

No testing, I promise. :P :hug: 

Those were good responses to that question, hehe. I didn't actually know if the terms phallosexual and gynosexual were at all in use, I've just been using them to describe people whose sole or at least primary criterion for sexual attraction seems to be genitalia rather than just about anything else about a person. :P 

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CassieQ

I was surprised that I knew most of these.  Not clear on the difference between pansexual and omnisexual though.

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Thorn Wilde
4 hours ago, CassieQ said:

I was surprised that I knew most of these.  Not clear on the difference between pansexual and omnisexual though.

Pansexual people can be attracted to just about anybody regardless of gender. Omnisexual people are basically attracted to just about everybody, period. They ain't picky. :P 

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CassieQ
On 12/9/2019 at 5:55 AM, Mikiesboy said:

i hate labels of any sort, i'm not sure they help and are often used against us in hurtful ways

i just care about people

however, i appreciate the effort you have put in here to help bring understanding of all the various terms

queer works.  :)

I think in some cases, it can be helpful.  I grew up in the 90s.  I knew lesbian and gay, but that was about it.  I didn't know bisexuality was a thing.  When puberty hit, I was very confused and frustrated with myself for not being able to "figure out" my orientation.  I could remember having a crush on a guy in my class, but also noticing how pretty some of the girls were as they walked down the hall.  I thought that I could be attracted to girls or boys, not both.  I thought that there was something wrong with me, like maybe I was gay and didn't want to admit it, or straight and didn't want to admit that, or that I was a mess who just couldn't make up my mind.  

If I knew what bisexual was in high school, that would have helped.  I don't think I would have wanted to "label" myself that at the time, but it would have been nice to know that something like that existed.        

Labels can be used to hurt others as well...I think it comes down to how they are used.

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Thorn Wilde
On 12/28/2019 at 9:36 PM, CassieQ said:

I think in some cases, it can be helpful.  I grew up in the 90s.  I knew lesbian and gay, but that was about it.  I didn't know bisexuality was a thing.  When puberty hit, I was very confused and frustrated with myself for not being able to "figure out" my orientation.  I could remember having a crush on a guy in my class, but also noticing how pretty some of the girls were as they walked down the hall.  I thought that I could be attracted to girls or boys, not both.  I thought that there was something wrong with me, like maybe I was gay and didn't want to admit it, or straight and didn't want to admit that, or that I was a mess who just couldn't make up my mind.  

If I knew what bisexual was in high school, that would have helped.  I don't think I would have wanted to "label" myself that at the time, but it would have been nice to know that something like that existed.        

Labels can be used to hurt others as well...I think it comes down to how they are used.

Exactly this.

And I had  a similar experience... It was pre-puberty, but I was the kind of kid who fell in love left right and centre. One day, I fell in love with a girl and I was hella confused. As soon as I learned what bisexual was, I adopted it for myself.

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Puppilull

Thanks for a helpful list! I agree on the whole label thing, as they can be both helpful and hurtful. We just need to figure out how to use them in a good way. For greater self-understanding they are good tools. (A bit like how I use Myers Briggs. I find it useful for myself, but wouldn't outright tell anyone else their "type" unless they asked and I felt I could explain in a fruitful way.)  

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JamesSavik

Thanks. i needed this.

I hate being clueless about this issue but, I have to admit being confused as heck about it at times and hate to show my ignorance by asking.

 

Spoiler

I used to idenitfy as a horn-dog sexual. Now... it's so complicated I'm just confused.

🆒

Edited by jamessavik
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Thorn Wilde
21 hours ago, jamessavik said:

Thanks. i needed this.

I hate being clueless about this issue but, I have to admit being confused as heck about it at times and hate to show my ignorance by asking.

 

  Hide contents

I used to idenitfy as a horn-dog sexual. Now... it's so complicated I'm just confused.

🆒

Happy to help. :) 

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