Here ya go.

noun 1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. 2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend. 3. sexual passion or desire. 4. a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart. 5. (used in direct address as a term of endearment, affection, or the like): Would you like to see a movie, love? 6. a love affair; an intensely amorous incident; amour. 7. sexual intercourse; copulation. 8. (initial capital letter) a personification of sexual affection, as Eros or Cupid. 9. affectionate concern for the well-being of others: the love of one's neighbor. 10. strong predilection, enthusiasm, or liking for anything: her love of books. 11. the object or thing so liked: The theater was her great love. 12. the benevolent affection of God for His creatures, or the reverent affection due from them to God. 13. Chiefly Tennis. a score of zero; nothing. 14. a word formerly used in communications to represent the letter L.

13. Chiefly Tennis. a score of zero; nothing.

Winner.

Just like people who want to be rich, there are people everywhere who want to be 'in love'. But just like money, there's 1 rich human being for every 1,000,000 who aspire to it. But that doesn't stop them from faking. Fake it 'til you make it, don't they say? Just like millions worldwide who invest well beyond their means to appear 'rich', there are millions worldwide who invest unnatural amounts of effort to appear 'in love'. They buy extravagant gifts ('my husband bought me diamonds, he must really love me'), they have romantic getaways ('we're going to Hawaii in March, we're so in love'), they meet regularly for 'dates' and eventually co-habit...

See? I believe the complete opposite. I believe there are people, millions, who everyday tell themselves they aren't in love, when they are. But as love is as subjective as pornography (), that's impossible to prove. Instead I'll caution against speaking for other people about their feelings, and add an example that references sex, because I'm just one-track minded that way.

Every time someone says, "Normal people don't do that in bed," what they're really saying is, "I don't do that in bed." I hope the parallel is clear.

Good luck with your story.

Damn it Libby, don't be so rational.

I agree with your POV to an extent, but to say there are millions of ignorant people 'in love' doesn't necessarily discredit my observation that there are millions of delusional 'in love' people as well. But I'll happy acknowledge the glass as 'half full', as long as we're both acknowledging that the glass actually exists.

I'd be interested to know your definition of 'in love', too. I agree that it's subjective, but the bar seems lower than it's ever been in terms of defining 'love'. Would explain a lot about the current divorce statistics, I'm sure...

My secret's out! I'm a romantic at heart.

Well, you have two things going on here, don't you? You mention wanting to write 'love'. I bet you could, with your hands tied behind your back nonetheless. Some people will feel it and some people may not, which goes for any emotion brought on by the written word.

If you wanted to write a convincing gunshot victim scene, I could tell you things like...there's a moment of unreality, very brief, then a flash of ice cold, like you've been dipped in ice water, then pain so intense it makes you vomit. You get dizzy as shock sets in. You cry. You wonder why your blood feels so hot. Sticking detail like that into a story can sell the scene to just about anybody...except to those who have been shot and who've had a completely different experience. They may say, 'It's nothing like that.' What they mean, of course, is that it wasn't like that for them.

Since I doubt you're curious about parental/child love, and instead romantic love, I'll admit to loving three men and two women in my life. One I've been attached to for seventeen years. The others were relationships that lasted different peiods of time -- the shortest six months (she threw me over for a blonde), the longest four years -- but I loved them all. Was it as strong as the love I have for my husband? That's a tough question. Those relationships are years old. They felt very strong at the time.

Nor will I bore you with all the trappings of what I think make a successful marriage, much of which is cooperation, sacrifice, and compromise... not three-day romantic weekends in the Poconos. You want to know about love, and, believe it or not, I can come to a point, so here it is: I'd willingly, without a thought, without the slightest hesitation, die for him. I value my life, don't get me wrong, but if I saw him threatened, my first emotional reaction would be to put myself in between him and harm.

Does everybody feel like that? Probably not. Maybe. Who knows? There are infinite ways to love.

A nod to your observations about the social aspects of love and romance. And I have a whole slew of thoughts on love as a social convention, but I will save them for later, before you ban me from your blog for being too long-winded.

Take care, my dear. And best of luck.

love is the absence of selfishness.