FanLit

What’s funny is that it wasn’t my intention to write a poetic verse to you, they were the first words that came to me from reading your piece so I guess the poet inspires poetry, 😊. What you say about you and Michael is so true, love is a living thing and living things must be fed, we don’t always feed it the right things tho, so instead of watching love grow, we watch love go.... You are very, very, very welcome, tim.

“You always hurt the ones you love”. That was the refrain echoing through my head reading this story up until the conversation by the tree. I love how he found refuge in that tree, even if in his communion with it this time he was offering himself up as a sacrifice on the altar of the unholy. I had no sympathy for Mark and as cold as it may seem, I was not upset he resorted to what he did to end his abuse, I garnered some understanding after his conversation with Chester in the afterlife but still don’t excuse his actions. Yes, Mark was a victim of horrific abuse, and he tried to save Chester in his own way by telling him to leave but he made a choice to continue the cycle of abuse, in varying degrees of escalation. That his final act was an act of love does not undo the damage he inflicted on Chester. “If… if you knew that, why didn’t you get help? Sick people get help. I really wish—” “It takes something I didn’t have. I’m sorry.” “I don’t understand.” “I didn’t either. I wanted to stop being so angry… I really did.” I know Chester also bears some responsibility, as he chose to stay; I was even able to justify his choice in the beginning of his relationship with Mark because love can excuse the inexcusable....that he resigned himself to dying at Mark’s hands is what I could not accept. I don’t know if he realized just how much he was like Mark’s mother. The first mention of Jordy felt refreshing in this piece....he spoke to hope and the reality that what we think is secret often isn’t. In my epilogue to this story, Jordy is rewarded with Chester’s love after staying by his side as a devoted friend through Chester’s recovery of himself. “Hurt people hurt people” The war of abuse has more casualties than any military conflict we’ve ever known and it’s PTSD always affects more than just the abuser and the abusee. No one should be such a battle scarred veteran at 23. 😰 Your considerable skill made this a very thought provoking piece, Gary; One where the only defined villain was Mark’s father and the defined hero was Jordy; Even with my lack of sympathy to Mark, I still saw his shades of grey, along with Chester and Mark’s mother. I love that even tho your narrative traverses the life cycle of an abusive relationship, it ended with hope, that we not only saw the light at the end of the tunnel, we saw Chester walk out of it. 🌤🌈 Cheers to another well done piece, my platonic friend. 🍻

tim, you are beautiful. tim, you are strong. tim, you are talented. tim, you belong. I couldn’t help feeling parallels between Tommy and Tarek and you and Michael. I understand the insidious, clinging hold deep depression can have on one’s life. It puts out the light, it decays growth that tries to flourish in love and positivity. It defies the words and good intentions of others, leaving you to feel unwanted, unworthy. I appreciate your battle, tim; I know it is daily and I applaud everyday you win. 👏 You belong in this time. Your poetry is some of the most beautiful I’ve ever read and as timeless as it is, you were meant to write it now. You belong in Michael’s love. Michael belongs in your love; What you two share is special and rare and what everyone spends their life looking for. Thank you for telling the uncomfortable stories, I hope you know there is beauty even in those weeds of your literary garden. You provide therapy for your readers, as I hope it provides therapy for you. Thank you, tim. Thank you so much. 😘

I can't not," he spat, bitter and wounded. "I can't not forgive you. Jesus God, I wish I had it in me to not forgive you." To be loved unconditionally like this is a gift few will ever really know and I hope these words reverberate in Andy for the rest of his life. You walked us through the foundation of their friendship, the bond that sustained and bettered them both created in childhood with adult strength. You walked us through their breakup via Andy’s flawed foundering with brutal, unflinching clarity and it is the same way you bring us to their reconnection, a balls to the wall reckoning of all wrongdoings, and absolute forgiveness. Andy is doubly blessed with Matt and Angie; Andy wouldn’t be the man Angie loves without the Matt shaped filter and border in his life. This story is painful and hopeful, imperfectly perfect. Thank you for creating this journey.

There is so much sadness in this story: Justin’s taking Eric for granted (in my opinion), his careless promiscuous behavior that cost him and Eric their health, Justin’s decline and his last days. Then there is Davie and Sean, the rose among the thorns, the ray of light shining through the clouds. Their development (or potential development) keeps me from choosing “sad” for the story, that and Eric’s devotion to Justin. I don’t judge Justin his free loving ways, when you’re young and full of hormones and freedom, it’s what you do, what a lot more people did before AIDS made it’s life stealing presence known. And while I feel Justin took Eric for granted, Eric let him, it was his choice. I hoped Eric’s results would have been negative but given the time of the story, I wasn’t surprised it was not. It is a great mercy stories like these are no longer the norm people with AIDS have to face and you are right and good in sharing them, they should be remembered. Thank you.

How difficult can it be?” HA!! Famous last words.... Amanda’s a good choice, and she has Trout’s back via the rules, whether Trout realizes it or not. (Them rules are crazy, tho) Bring on Stinky and Co., oh and her male co workers. Trout’ll be like a hooker at Fleet Week but unable to touch; Their gaydar will be pinging with him and trying to expose him, too but if he can pass that, he should be home free, unless a certain blond “Madam Bovary” reader works at Amanda’s firm....😯

“A plump owl of a woman stands in the doorway to the function room, her huge eyes magnified by oval framed glasses scanning the bar area. When she waddles toward me, her autumnal tweeds scrunch, and feathered tufts of red and orange streaks bob up and down from the shady bird's nest of her hair. She hugs a clipboard under one wing and stops before me, a scarlet manicured claw held out in greeting.” Your descriptive capacities are on another level, 😄 That speed dating was horrid. Makes me wish “Love Connection” was as wild as it gets; At least he bumped into a possibility in Amanda, tho it was interesting her bashing of the speed dating that she was a participant in; Has she never heard the phrase “the lady doth protest too much, methinks”? Lead on, Macduff, the journey is interesting....

“And if you get lucky, bud, bring me back a little something under your fingernail.” Excuse my ignorance but what does “little something under your fingernail” mean?

Yay, It’s back!! Hi!! 👋

Sizzling chemistry. Will this story continue?

Okay, 👍 I know I’ve been calling you “Rump” for Rumpelstiltskin but I think since you turn story straw to gold, I should call you “Goldie” instead. I mean “Rump” could apply too but ”Goldie” sounds cuter than “Rump”. 😘

Leave it to Carter to divert Aron’s attention with sex; 😄 His friend Aron, who until recently, believed he was a homophobe. That was both hot and hilarious and unexpected, even tho it was very wanted (by the participants and the readers 😉). Carter and Aron belong together; Carter felt no awkwardness during their intimacy and Aron had a dream come true; Consider them both hooked. You could tell he wanted Carter to say they were more than fuck buddies but I get Carter holding back, Aron is still married on paper and he’s not 100% sure about Aron’s feelings; Aron may not have felt guilty but Carter doesn’t want to be a rebound. Talk about stubborn with Aron!! He ruined his life to spite good advice. Mama always knows, Aron. I don’t trust Alex. At. All. My eyebrow was raised during his conversation with Carter along with being a little fearful. Alex chose to remember the accident instead of the body swap, why does that remembrance make him so chummy to Carter? You can’t sleep around a snake, you never know when it’s going to strike. Where is ponytail girl?!?! Alex should not be the only one to know what happened with the accident. This was good, Rump. I’m glad C&A are lovers now.

Jenn loves Noah and Noah hurt her. I hope she can forgive him and that their friendship survives, if it doesn’t, at least she did try. I’m glad Noah and Jordan had sex. The sex scene was fine, detail wise. (I personally like raunchy and/or romantic sexual depictions, so this was okay with me). Their physical connection wasn’t gratuitous, it was right between them. I hope they keep faith with each other, that is what will get them through any challenges with anyone or anything else.

Kiyo is an ambitious dick but I don’t think he knows he’s giving Milan tainted blood in the transfusions. At first I thought he was but after that conversation between Cade and “Mr. X”, I realized Cade is using Kiyo like he’s using everyone, it seems. I loved Rory standing up for Milan and it was so sweet to see that Milan is already in love with Rory; It’s not just him being sheltered, he’s drawn to his mate. The Morgan’s aren’t even aware someone in their town wants to take over the Alpha spot from Big Morgan; Danger’s on the horizon at every turn. A tangled web has been weaved and I feel It’ll get a lot bigger before Rory and Milan can be together.

How are Rowan and Grant doing?

I hope this gets completed. We need to see Frank shake Reed out of all his pretensions that cost him his relationship with Brandon so that he can get his HEA, too. Frank is the cutest and cuddliest and smarter than people give him credit for. I don’t think he’ll let Reed change him the way Brandon did and that’s exactly who Reed needs.

You are one of the best at putting false paths out there, Dear Rump. I only hope that when Alex’s true motivation is revealed for his nice turn to Carter that I don’t kick myself too hard for missing it. I didn’t mention before about Aron’s reaction to a shirtless Carter but it was funny. “He risked a look at Aron. The man seemed serious and his dark eyes were hooded, filled with something. He licked his lips and swallowed. To his dismay, Aron did the same thing at the exact same moment.” Was I mistaken in thinking Alex was surprised with what he saw under Carter’s shirt, too? Aron now knows Carter is okay with him being gay and they are friends again, I think Aron’s going to realize his attraction to Carter is back (never really left) and may be harder to control. Why did Alex want Carter half naked? 🤨🤔

“Another thing nobody tells you about dying is that people who love you will not let you die if they have any possible fucking way to keep you from doing it.” As compelling as your story had been to that point, those were the words that made me cry. I hope you understand their choice. There is a saying attributed to Winston Churchill, “If you’re going through hell, keep going”. You did and you didn’t have to so I believe there is something better in store for you besides being a cautionary tale. Your eloquent, brutal honesty took my breath away. I don’t know if I would have had your endurance; I’d like to think I would for the sake of my child but what you went through, I don’t know. Happy one year anniversary on your transplant. I wish you happy, sweet Razor. Thank you for sharing.

🙁 I was reading chapter two yesterday, ready to go to chapter three and the bouncer kicked me out of the club!! 😳 I hope I can get back in soon....🥺

Carter can try playing games to get what he wants but he is in way over his head going against Alex; The guy’s a pro. Carter is a simple, basic guy (and I mean that respectfully), while Alex’s many layers are curdled with cruel selfishness. So Alex is trying to seduce Carter to bust up his friendship with Aron? Or is he getting Aron into the idea of threesomes and wants to include Carter? There can be any number or tricks that demented dildo could be coming up with, (Machiavellian, indeed). My bet is that he wants to seduce Carter and destroy Aron’s faith in him. Can he? Okay, okay,....I like Simon. Adultery aside, he seems like a really sweet guy, definitely someone who deserves better than Alex. I do give Alex credit tho, predators know their prey, I hope he learns the hard way he barked up the wrong tree with Carter.

😳😮 Is Milan the lone wolf?!?! Nice development with Rory and Milan making it official and nice cliffhanger.

And Doug is a hoot and a half, “chick like a billboard” and “shake the snake”, smh

Hi Brian!! I’m onboard, interested to see if this “vagina virgin” 🤣 will go along with everyone’s efforts to hook him up with a wife to get the mansion in Montauk. Something tells me cousin Garrison and “blond Bovary” (thanks droughtquake, lol) will impede the process. Given your proven track record for putting together guys who are chemically compatible (aka scorching hot good sex), I’m interested in and hoping to see how that will fit in here. Sounds like the family needs to get Grandma a hearing aid, lol. Oh and the other version of this story you alluded to in a previous comment sounds intriguing. Happy American Thanksgiving. 🦃

Noah should stay; And while I understand Jenn’s love life wasn’t the best before, she’s being a really bitter Betty over a date and a half. They never even kissed!! Now I’m wondering if she’ll stay friends with Noah when she finds out about him and Jordan. I really like N&J’s bond, that sex’ll be hot because there’s a physical (yay animalistic lust) and emotional connection.

Milo is a very intense, sexy, possessive, compelling creature; The chemistry between he and Liron is white hot. 🧨💥 It could be this is how he is with every encounter but there seems to be more on Milo’s part. (We know what Liron wants) I think it’s good Liron takes some breathing room, especially since he thinks Milo will be walking out of his life the next day.