Ian's Heart - 12. Chapter 12 - Ian

“James, I spoke with Bill and John. They’ve told me to be open to this opportunity to get to know Adam. I hope you’d approve of him. I think you’d approve. Anyway, I’d better finish getting ready he’ll be here any minute.” I looked at James' picture, that was sitting beside my bed as always. I didn’t feel bad about going on this date. It’s a relief, there's no guilt, no panic like there had been in the past. It’s as if James is giving me a push to help me along. Okay Ian, stop procrastinating, it’s almost time.

Wallet, wallet, where did I put my wallet, I check my pants pockets, oh, thank god – back pocket. Jacket, I scurried to my closet and reach for my sports coat. I carried it into the living room again where Paddy and Sasha are watching TV cuddled up on the couch. Now my keys, I look around the living room, while I put on my coat. I can’t see them. Maybe the kitchen, I quickly went to the kitchen and have a quick sweep. They're nowhere to be seen, back to the living room, another quick sweep.

“DAD! What’s wrong? What are you looking for?” Pat said amused with me, but still trying not to grin. He stood from the couch and walked toward me.

“Huh? Oh… I can’t find my keys. Adam will be here any second.” I said frustrated, twisting and turning looking for my keys.

“Do you mean the ones that are in your hand?” Pat chortled.

I looked at my hand, and a wave of relief and stupidity swept through my body.

“Geez, Dad. You need to calm down. Take a deep breath. It’s just a date, he already likes you.” Pat said grabbing my wrist and shaking it, trying to get me to loosen up. Sasha looked me up and down.

“Is that what you’re wearing Uncle Ian?” She questioned my outfit with sympathetic eyes.

“Um… I was going to?” I looked down at what I was wearing, “Is it that bad?” I frowned concerned, “I look ridiculous, don’t I?” I said slumping in defeat.

“No you don’t look ridiculous, the outfit’s fine. It’s that it makes you look… Well… Boring and old, and like a school teacher.” She said standing, “Come on let's find you something better.” She took me by the hand as she went by dragging me to my room. Apparently, I was going whether I wanted to or not. Pat was desperately trying not to laugh at my nervousness.

“Sha Love, I am a school teacher,” I said worriedly.

“Not tonight you’re not.” She said facing me, stopping in front of my closet. She looked me over again, then turned and opened my wardrobe doors, and started swishing through my hangers. “Tonight,” Sasha brought out two button down shirts, one was forest green that shimmered brown in different light, the other was cream with a grape colored modern pattern, and held them one at a time under my neck. Continuing her monologue while she pensively switched back and forth between the two shirts. “Tonight Uncle Ian, you are a sexy, single, confident man,” then Sasha laid the cream and grape shirt on the bed, “who by the way, is going to look hot when I’m finished with him.” She smiled, quickly pecked my cheek and turned back to my wardrobe.

Paddy laid smirking on my bed watching Sasha in her element as she excitedly dressed me up. Her very own live doll. She made me take off my sports coat and switched it for my leather jacket, and laid out my black/dark charcoal straight leg jeans under the shirt and bewitched her nose as she inspected it.

“Does Sasha do this to you Pat when you go out?” I asked wondering and teasing Sasha at the same time.

Paddy chortled, and rolled his eyes, “All the time, she’s a clothes snob and kind of bossy huh?” Sasha glared daggers at Patrick.

“I am not bossy,” She whined, “I can’t help it if you two are inept at dressing yourselves. You definitely have that in common.” Sasha rolled her eyes, “You’re fifteen Babe, and you dress in whatever’s closest instead of what’s in style. Plus you wore blue and red together. Ew!” Sasha’s whole body shuddered at the thought. Pat just shrugged. I had to suppress a laugh.

“Yep, this will do. Uncle Ian go into your bathroom and change. For the love of God, take off those shoes, I can’t even look at them.” She looked at my shoes with disgust and disdain. “I’ll go through what you have and find something…” she waved her hand at my feet, “more… suitable than those things.” Sasha picked up the chosen clothes and handed them to me. “Paddy go and get your hair product Babe, I’m going to fix that when you’ve changed.” Sasha pushed me toward my ensuite. So bossy. I hope I don’t look like an old man trying to look young when she’s finished. Maybe I should just call it off the whole thing, I’m seriously out of practice.

I came out of the bathroom dressed in the new outfit, Sasha was holding my black dress boots in one hand. Her face lit up, and the smile on her face went from ear to ear. She nodded her head slowly, “You look so hot Uncle Ian,” She gave a little fist pump. “Here put these on and then we are going to fix that mop on your head.” Sasha leaned over and picked up the hair product Paddy had brought in from his bathroom.

I sat on the bed putting my boots on, crap Adam’s here. What is with this connection we have, it’s the single most bizarre thing I’ve ever experienced, “There’s no time Sasha, Adam’s here,”

Pat scoffed, “No he’s…”

Knock, knock, knock.

Pat raised an eyebrow and screwed his face up at me. I shrugged my shoulder, “Don’t ask, I don’t know.”

“It will do him good to wait a couple of minutes, that way he won’t think you're too eager or easy,” Sasha said matter of factly, she was so serious I couldn’t help but chuckle. “You answer the door Baby, I’ll take care of your Dad.” Sasha all but dragged me into the bathroom, sitting me down on the clothes hamper, and then went into hairdresser mode on my hair. She put god knows what in it, scrunched her finger through. Stood back a second and swept her hand through here and there. Stood back again and grinned.

“Now look in the mirror,” Sasha said with her hands clasped in front of her chest looking pleased with herself. I looked at the young guy in the mirror surprised, she’d managed to knock ten years off of me.

“You look so hot Uncle Ian, he’s going to be speechless,” Sasha said excitedly.

I turned to Sasha and said sincerely, “Thank you, Sweetheart,” I hugged her, and she squeezed me tight.

Sasha winked at me the cheeky bugger, grabbed my hand and pulled me to the bedroom. “Don’t forget your jacket.” She let go of my hand and move toward the door, but before she left my room, Sasha turned back to me and said shyly. “Me and you Uncle Ian, we have a date together next Saturday. We are going shopping and turn you back into a Prince. You might be old, but you’re not that old,” The cheeky shit, I’m not old. I heard her tell Adam I would be right out when she reached the living room.

I’m so used to dressing down these past years it didn’t even occur to me that maybe I was doing it on purpose so people wouldn’t notice me. I’ve been told I’m handsome or good looking before, but I … I guess I’ll know by the reaction from Adam. What if this outfit is too much, he’s only ever seen me in my boring old man clothes, as Sasha affectionately refers to them.

Well here goes nothing, I stood from the bed and looked at myself in the full-length mirror once more. I can’t believe that’s me looking back. I look young, almost fashionable. I don’t appear to look like a slob in any case. Okay, young Ian, let’s do this.

Adam and Paddy had their back to me as I reached the living room. Sasha was sitting back on the couch watching television ignoring the world. Adam looked so hot, he was dressed in a deep blue button down shirt, bootleg jeans and chunky boots, Adam quickly looked in my direction and then back to the TV. His head snapped back to me, as his body turned to face me. His eyes were big and bulging from his eye sockets.

“You look so…” he eyed Paddy for a second, who was smirking. Adam cleared his throat, “Ahem, you look nice.” He said flatly. Did Paddy have a word and make him say that? Oh crap, he doesn’t like it. Do I change? Do I offer to change? Do I pretend I’m comfortable with what I’m wearing? Why is this so incredibly hard to know what to do, how to act, what to say…

“You ready to go?” Adam asked smiling, swinging his keys around on him finger once.

“Uh-huh yeah!” I answered in quick concession.

“Dad, don’t forget your keys,” Paddy said giving my wallet and keys, he must have taken them from the side when we were in the bedroom before my makeover.

“Thanks, Son, um… Sasha Sweetheart, do you have a ride home or do you need me to come back and take you?” I asked.

She pulled her focus from the television, “Nope I’m okay Uncle Ian. My brother is coming to pick me up at ten-thirty.” She said smiling warmly, “You guys have a lovely time,” she waved and turned her attention back to the television. Sasha is playing it cool, I know as soon as I step outside the apartment, Paddy is in for an hour of an over excited Sasha.

As I pulled the front door closed, three things happened so quickly my head was spinning. I heard Sasha squeal, my back met the wall, a hand on my hip and one cupping my face, and a pair of warm, soft lips were on mine, then the front door opened and I heard my Son clear his throat. My head is spinning, I think I’ll die right now, it’s the only possible solution to deal with everything I’m feeling. This can’t be happening. Adam slowly pulled away from me, “Uh, Dad you forgot your phone,” he gave it to me with his eyebrow cocked, “Isn’t that supposed to happen at the end of the date?” Paddy now smirked. He went back inside and shut the door, I heard him yell to Sasha, “Hey Sash, you’ll never guess what Dad…” I thankfully didn’t listen to the rest.

Adam stepped back quickly, and commenced rambling nervously, “I’m so sorry, I don’t know what come over me. You came out of your room looking like that, your Son was watching me, and I panicked. Then you looked at me with those gorgeous eyes of yours when you shut the door. I just acted. I’m really sorry if I embarrassed you. I swear, I didn’t mean for that to happen you just look so hmmm… Sexy and HOT!” he said and moved toward me again, but I put my hand up to stop him. “It’s not how I wanted this to go, or how I wanted our first kiss either. Can we please start over, I promise to keep my lips and hands to myself.” He said in a hurry, and worriedly, his face contorted like he was in pain.

I’m not even mad, just shocked and embarrassed. I think. Say something put his mind at ease, don’t let him believe that you're angry. Ian say something. I cleared my throat, “Um… Sure we can,” I moved away from the wall. Adam let out a rush of air and side eyed me as we fell into step beside each other. I nudged Adam with my shoulder gently, “People always say first dates are awkward, can’t get any more awkward than it is right now. So I guess this is going well.” I chuckled trying to lighten the mood.

Adam gave a quick but almost silent laugh, “Yeah I guess,”

The trip down to his car was quiet.. When he took his seat beside me, he fiddled with his keys, after a moment he broke the silence. “Ian, I am really sorry about before.”

I reached over and squeezed his forearm in reassurance, “Please, don’t think about it. We’ll pretend it never happened.” Adam gently nodded his head and put the key in the ignition.

“Thank you,” he said shyly.

<>-<>-<>

Adam brought me to one of the fanciest restaurants in town. The host at the restaurant snobbily showed us to the bar, there was going to be a wait on our reservation. We sat at a high top cocktail table waiting for a server to take our drink order. I looked around the restaurant, it was stuffy and overdone. The waitstaff in black and whites with bow ties and dress shoes. I checked Adam’s comfort level, he looked as uncomfortable as I felt.

“Adam, do you usually come to restaurants like this?” I asked quietly leaning across the table.

He looked at the surroundings, “No, not typically. I wanted to bring you somewhere nice.”

“Thank you, that’s very thoughtful,” I smiled warmly, “but honestly, it wasn’t necessary. They’ve sat us at the bar, there’s barely a table taken, and still, no-one has even approached us for a drink order. Do you feel comfortable here? Did you want to get out of here and go somewhere else? A sports bar or pizza, something a little more low brow. Something more… us.”

Adam sighed and looked around, “You’re right, let's get out of here,” Adam stood looking a little defeated. I guess this date hasn’t really been the going well. I feel bad that I’ve upset him, I shouldn’t have said anything. We walked out, Adam walked one step ahead of me. As we came close to the car, I lightly grabbed his arm as we reached the car.

“Adam,” I said softly, he grunted. “Adam,” I said again, and he turned to toward me, disappointment written all over his face. I slowly lifted myself up on my toes and gently leaned into him. My lips softly touched his. He stiffened for a second and then his whole body relaxed into the kiss. His arms came around and embraced me, I put my hands on his chest and fisted his shirt holding him in place. Adam’s tongue gently asked for permission to enter, and I happily let him in. The second our tongues met, we both softly moaned. Adam let himself fall back to lean on the car bringing me with him, so I was standing between his legs and flush against his body. One hand reaching under my jacket and shirt, skin to skin with my lower back the warmth went right through my whole body. His other slid up holding my head as he kissed me.

Everything around us disappeared, for that moment in time. There was just Adam and me, the world outside of us didn’t exist. The feelings I usually have when he’s around intensified by a billion. They were all present, butterflies, stomach flips and the need to get closer to him. It was overwhelming, but at the same time, it was intimate, familiar, home, comfortable, safe and I wouldn’t want to be any place else. It’s like everything in my life, good and bad, has led me to this moment. I very gently broke our kiss but made sure my lips stayed close to his, I want him to know the kiss is what I wanted. Adams' eyes opened slightly.

“Best kiss I’ve ever had,” I whispered. The corners of his mouth turned upward slightly, his eyes closed again, and the distance between us disappeared. Our lips met, and he slid his tongue in to meet mine. I let go of his shirt and slid my hands behind his neck. After a couple of heartbeats, he deepened the kiss, it wasn’t frantic or animalistic. Simply a way of conveying to me what he was feeling, our kiss, this real first kiss, is full of romance, intimacy, and hope.

A car out on the street went by blaring their horn and yelling out the window. We jumped apart, like two teenagers being caught by their parents. We looked at each other and chuckled shyly. Adam grabbed my jeans by the belt loops and pulled me to him. His arms came around my back, and he held me to him, I rest my head against his chest and sighed. The way it feels to be in his arms is inexplicable, it’s something I’ve never felt before, a feeling I’ll always remember. I never want to leave his embrace – ever.

“I hope that was okay?” I asked, wary of what the answer might be.

“That was our first kiss, that’s the kiss I want to remember from tonight,” Adam said his deep baritone burying into the top of my head before he kissed it. I felt it reach my heart and take hold, our connection just got a little stronger. “I don’t get how I can be completely comfortable with you and at the same time be so nervous.” He uttered.

“I know,” I answered in almost a whisper, then my stomach interrupted our moment. I felt his whole body shake with a laugh, even though he was silent.

““What was that?” he laugh erupting, then his stomach did the same. Adam buried his head into my neck and groaned. I could feel his face heat up in embarrassment.

“I think we both need might need to eat,” I chuckled, “let’s go and find somewhere that’s loud, obnoxious and plain everyday fun.” I swatted his chest lightly and pulled away from him. “You like sports right?”

“Good bad and in between,” He said with a chuckle while unlocking and opening the door..

I waited for Adam to get in the car beside me before continuing, “Let’s go to Peder’s then, it’s everything I suggested and the foods good. We’ll be able to relax a little, eat and watch a game no pressure. Only arguments over who’s team is better.”

Adam started the car smiling, then reached over taking my hand in his, “Sounds perfect.”

<>-<>-<>

Peder’s was alive, noisy and packed to the rafters with people of all ages, but we managed to score a high-top table with two stools as a couple were leaving. It had a good view to nearly all 9 of the televisions around the bar room so we’d be able to see any game we wanted to watch. Adam went to the bar himself instead of waiting for a server and brought back two beers, two menus and a small wooden bowl of peanuts in their shell.

“Thanks, is there anything particular you wanted to watch?” I asked Adam.

He looked around at the televisions, “Probably flick between the football and the Avalanche game that’s on the big screen. The rest look like recaps or second viewings.” He said and opened his menu.

“Sounds good, who are you going for so I can cheer…” I opened my menu and stared at it before continuing, “for the other team.”

Adam side eyed me from his menu, “Cheeky ass bastard,” he muttered and looked back at his menu smiling. I chuckled at him. “Do you want to share some loaded fries, and chicken wings or do you want a full meal?”

“You know what, that sounds perfect. But…” He cut me off.

“Get extra ranch?” He smiled cheekily.

“How did you know that was what I was going to say?” I said incredulously.

“Your girlfriend at the diner the other day,” I knew he was jealous, that’s cute, “brought us each a separate ramekin of ranch, and you used all of yours and moved onto mine,” Adam said laughing. How embarrassing, I didn’t even realize I’d done that. I usually do it to Liam because he only likes a little bit and never uses all of his.

“Oh,” I said sheepishly, “sorry,”

“Don’t be. I liked that you felt comfortable enough to steal from my plate.” He smiled warmly at me, then squeezed my hand. “Thank you for turning this date around. I was expecting you to ask to be taken home after we left the restaurant.”

I leaned in so he could hear every word, looking him straight in the eye, and said “Let me be clear, I want to be here on this date. I want to spend time with you. I want to get to know you, the good, the bad and the ugly. I have been looking forward to this since Sunday when you asked me.” Adam’s shoulders seem to slump releasing any tension he was holding. The line of his mouth twitched upward toward a smile. “I’m sorry if I made you feel bad at the restaurant. It wasn’t my intention.”

“You didn’t. I guess I was a little disappointed by the restaurant. I wanted you to know you are worth the effort. We didn't have the best start to the evening, and they did treat us like second class citizens. I suppose I was a little embarrassed by that too.” Adam said frustrated.

“That place was stuffy, pretentious, and they were rude. I do like romantic dates, they have their place. But this,” I paused and slowly moved my hand out, “this is more us. I’d prefer we have fun together and enjoy each others company.” Adam leaned closer and quickly laid a chaste kiss on my lips grinning. He then abruptly stood, took the menus and went to the bar to put our order in. He returned to the table with a number on a metal platform and two more beers.

“Going for the get him drunk and take advantage of him approach are we?” I snickered.

He blushed, “No. No, I just didn’t know when we’d be able to get another, it’s so busy.” He said panicked.

“Relax Adam, I was joking.” I laughed while his face went even redder as he sat down. I reached over putting my hand on his shoulder, “Okay, I’ll bet you a goodnight kiss, that San Jose kick ass against the Avalanche.”

Adam grinned, “You’re on,” he put his hand on my knee. We watched the hockey game, ribbing each other while we drank our first beer. Our food eventually arrived, and we ate, drank our beer and watched the game. Adam said to me, “Hey, what do I get if I win?”

I shrugged my shoulder, “What do you want?” I raised my eyebrow warily.

He grinned and his eyes lit up, “You take me on a date to the Farmers Market tomorrow and buy me strawberries.”

I rolled my eyes, “No good night kiss?” I teased him.

“Oh, that’s what I’ll get if the Pats win over Houston,” He said matter of factly pointing to the television hosting that game.

I laughed, “And if Houston win?”

“I’ll take you on another date to the Farmers Market tomorrow and buy you a tray of Mango’s,” he snickered.

“Blugh!! Vomit fruit. No thank you, I’ll take your strawberries.”

Adam gasped, “You wouldn’t,”

“Oh, I would,” I laughed. He laughed at me and squeezed my knee and pushed his ranch dressing closer for me to reach.

.

<>-<>-<>

“So now that you owe me a good night kiss and a trip to the Farmers Market to get strawberries, what do you want to do next?” Adam asked me once we were in the car.

“Well…” I started, but Adam’s phone rang. He gave me an apologetic look as he answered.

“Price,”

“What?” he asked shocked.

“Slow down Payne, take a deep breath. Then tell me again, I can’t understand you,” Adam told her calmly. His face went pale, and he took my hand.

“Okay, where are you now?”

“Yep, no I’ll take Ian home, and then I’ll be there.”

“No Payne, he’ll understand. I’m coming, and that’s all there is to it.”

“See you soon,” Adam ended the call.

“Is everything okay?” I asked compassionately. Apparently, something bad has happened.

“I’m sorry, I’ll have to take you home. Payne’s father has had a stroke, she’s at the hospital by herself. She doesn’t have anyone else.” Adam looked pained and torn.

“No you go to her, she needs you. I’ll catch a taxi home, no big deal.” I said as I tried to open the door.

“I will drive you home you’re not catching a taxi.” Adam stopped me from leaving the car.

“Adam, I’m not a kid. This is actual life and death, Payne needs you there now. I know what it feels like to be all alone in a hospital waiting for answers. I’d really prefer to catch a taxi home so you can get to her.”

“Thank you, Ian, I’ll make it up to you.” He said apologizing.

“It’s not necessary, this is important. Please call me in the morning and let me know how she and her father are doing.” I smiled warmly, “But I will give you your good night kiss now before I go.”

Adam leaned across the console and took his kiss, a tad indecent for the car, but delicious.

“Thanks, I had a really great evening, I hope Payne’s Dad is going to be okay. Drive safely please, don’t rush.” I gave his hand a squeeze and exited the car before he could say anything.