The Acquittal - 19. Chapter 18

“After the day we’ve had, you’d think you’d rather just lounge around the house,” Kyle remarked as he climbed out of Jacob’s truck in the empty gym parking lot.

Jacob shut his door, throwing a gym bag over his shoulder. “Oh, it’ll just be for a little while. All we did was stand around most of the morning and afternoon anyway.” He came around the truck to join him and looked around them. “See? Practically no one here. We’ll have the place to ourselves.”

Kyle muttered something under his breath but smirked slightly, eyes shining playfully as he gazed at him. “An hour. Maybe two.”

“One hour to work out, then some time in the pool,” he bargained, his eyes gazing back with a kind of look Kyle hadn’t seen in a very long time. Jacob could be playful when he was feeling positive. Something he hadn’t been the last time he had been here. Since his arrival the night before, Jacob seemed entirely different from his first visit home. He had a more confident air around him. There was no uncertainty in his voice. He laughed freely and his eyes shown with an inner light that made it hard for Kyle to object to anything he wanted to do.

“Well, let’s go then.” They headed into the gym to get started. Kyle had enjoyed the day at the orchard, watching families coming to visit the orchard, taking loads of apples that his family have been growing for over a century, meeting some people who he hadn’t seen since high school. The work had been steady as had the conversations with old friends from school, wanting to catch up and showing off their families.

He also remembered how many people had talked about his father and shown their concern for him. It gave him a renewed sense of his connection to his hometown that he had forgotten when he left for college. Back then, this was just a small town. Now, as he walked into the gym with Jacob, even this place with its own sets of memories felt like home.

When they walked in the attendant recognized them both and just waved them in, not bothering to charge Kyle the visitor’s fee. It took Kyle a moment as they walked into the locker room area to change before he realized it. “Hey, wasn’t that the kid from the hallway?”

“Huh?” Jacob looked up at him, confused at first and then it dawned on him. “Oh. Yeah, Corey.”

“Sounds like you’re friendly with him now,” he remarked as he slipped into a tank top.

“Dude,” he laughed lightly, “that was fourteen years ago. We made up awhile back.”

“What’s he doing here?”

He shrugged casually. Talking as he dressed into his workout gear. “He’s married, three kids. Works here, his wife is a doctor, I think. They were at the orchard yesterday, in fact. He asked about you.”

“He did?!” Kyle looked at him with mild surprise.

“Hate to tell ya, but you’re a little well known around here.” Jacob closed up his locker and smirked at Kyle with a playful glint in his eyes.

“I’m nothing special,” he said as he turned his blushing face away from him.

There was a moment of silence between them before Jacob looked at him and said in a quiet voice, “you’re special to me.” They looked at each other for a moment before Jacob said, “come on, let’s go.” and headed out into the gym. Kyle followed behind, the beginnings of that “tongue-tied” sensation inside him starting to grow.

With no one else in the weight room, they had their pick of where to set up. Jacob headed over to the free weights and started on some simple curls. Simple for him at least. Kyle noticed he was using noticeably larger weights on both arms than he ever did years ago.. He set himself up on a butterfly machine, setting the weight a little lower than he used to, knowing he hadn’t done much exercising in the last five years, just to warm up a bit.

He kept his focus on his presses but couldn’t help admiring Jacob’s attention to his own work. He remembered how he used to enjoy those early morning gym classes with Jacob when they were seniors together. They used to talk and have fun even as Jacob seemed to put a lot of effort into his body. From seeing him now, he seems to have taken that effort to a whole new level. He also noted he was using a lot more effort than he used to when he did butterfly curls. Maybe he should take this up again.

Jacob finished his sets and went to a neighboring leg press machine, glancing over at Kyle and smiling at him. “Don’t feel bad if you’re out of practice.” He set the weight limit on the machine and started his leg presses as he looked over at Kyle.

“It’s hard taking care of a baby and doing anything else other than taking care of a baby,” he said with a sigh as he finished a set, already feeling a little sweat beading up on his forehead.

“You mean, on your own,” he replied a small frown growing on his face. “That Stephanie friend of yours is really Matt’s mother?”

Kyle nodded, “yeah. She gave birth to him.”

“She seemed…” he searched for a nice way of saying it. “...uninvolved mostly. She was leaving that morning after she brought him here and she was more interested in her coffee than Matt.”

Kyle just shrugged indifferently. “She’s never really been that involved. And, yeah, she says she’s his mom but she doesn’t like doing the work involved. She doesn’t have any custodial rights to him. That was part of our deal. She wasn’t going to be stuck with a kid she didn’t want if anything happened to me.”

Jacob stared at him, slightly horrified. “What if something had happened to you?!”

Kyle sighed and smirked. “Relax. I made arrangements in my will that he would have gone to Dad. Actually, still will. Unless I’m married. Then my spouse would have parental rights. And, yeah, I know how crazy that sounds given what all happened, but, really, he was the only choice in my book despite what happened.”

Jacob seemed to be satisfied with that answer. “Ever come close?”

“To what?”

“Getting married?”

Kyle stood up and went over to a bench press machine next to him, laying down so his face wasn’t visible. “Ah… no. Not even close.”

“How come?”

“Single gay men aren’t known to be that interested in parenting,” he said flatly.

“Oh,” Jacob seemed to see the picture, “I’m guessing your dating life then…” It seemed like such a tender subject to bring up.

“Non-existent for the last four years or so, yeah,” Kyle said bitterly.

Jacob realized keeping this conversation going could ruin the mood for the rest of the day. “How’s the bench press feel for you?”

Kyle grunted slightly as he replied, “like I’m trying to lift a car and I’m only on seventy pounds. God, it’s been forever.”

“Only?” Jacob snickered and got up without finishing his set, looking down at him with a smirk. “Need some encouragement?”

Kyle looked up at him, a mixture of emotions running through is body as he forced the bar up. “Depends on if it’s legal or not,” he said with a smirk of his own.

Jacob kneeled down next to the bench. “Come on, Kyle. You know you can do this. Seventy pounds is nothing for you. You used to do a lot more than that,” his voice was low and felt like it was vibrating through Kyle’s body. “Head up, remember to exhale as you lift and inhale when you bring it down. Don’t let it fall and don’t lock your elbows when you get it up. Nice and easy. See? There you go. Keep it up, only a couple more left.”

Jacob kept up a running stream of encouragement as Kyle worked his way through the set. He could feel his heart pounding a little harder in his chest, unsure if it was the workout or Jacob’s voice making it beat so much. After a few minutes he got his way through the set and sat up looking at Jacob’s proud face. He grinned and said, “when you asked me about needing encouragement, I thought you meant I would get something at the end for all my hard work.”

“Oh,” Jacob’s eyes widened along with his grin. “Well, I guess since you made it, I can let you beat me in a race in the pool later,” he offered with feigned innocence.

“Let me,” Kyle replied, indignant. “I might be a little out of shape but I promise I’ll beat your ass in the water.”

Jacob’s eyes sparkled with laughter. “Well, maybe after we finish our workout here, then you can make good on that.” Without another word, Jacob stood and went back to his weights.

Kyle gave him a mock glare as he departed feeling an overwhelming urge to do something to get back at him but he held back. His mind filled with all sorts of things he wished he could do to Jacob. All of his ideas involved touching him and more than a few of them involved both of them getting some form of satisfaction from it. He had to control the images before long, realizing he hadn’t worn a jock and he was very close to showing Jacob and anyone else who may walk in what was going through his mind at the moment.

They spent the next half hour going through their own workouts before mutually deciding it was time to shower and go to the pool. There was some trash talking and Kyle was relieved that the showers were more private than they used to be back in his youth. In fact, except for Corey at the counter, he hadn’t seen anyone else in the entire gym while they were there. By the time they were in their swimming trunks with towels over their shoulders they were both feeling like the lost years between them had evaporated. The bond between them easily fell into place and Kyle got a renewed sense of gratitude for the friendship they shared.

“No starting blocks,” Jacob remarked with a little humor in his voice. “Think you can manage?”

“Get in the damn water,” Kyle said with a playful menace to his voice before sliding down into the pool. Jacob joined him with a wide grin, his eyes were pale blue and glittering with a deep feeling of love and connection he’d missed with Kyle. He felt the entire day was working out the way he had hoped. “Two laps back and forth.”

“What does the winner get,” Jacob asked casually but with an almost predatory smirk on his face.

“Bragging rights and anything else he wants,” Kyle replied, feeling his face flush even as he gave Jacob his own meaningful smirk with narrowed eyes.

“Alright then. Go ahead and count.”

“Three, two, one, go!” The two of them started slow, Kyle was all too aware of the fact he hadn’t swam compettatively in years. After a few sloppy strokes he slowly started to regain the muscle memory from years of practice as he started to slip through the water. Jacob was slower but only by a little bit. Years of working out gave him an endurance that let him barrel through the water. For the first lap they were evenly matched but through the second lap, Jacob had a harder time keeping up with Kyle who got his rhythm down and started pushing past him. At the end of the second lap, Kyle was nearly a full length ahead of Jacob by the time he finished.

“See,” Jacob said, catching his breath. “I told you I’d let you win.”

Kyle laughed and lunged for him playfully and the two of them started to wrestle and splash in the water, laughing, yelling and shouting like the two young men they were all those years ago. The passage of time between them suddenly seemed like only a season had passed. Kyle forgot about being an attorney and a single father as he splashed around in the pool, gliding away from Jacob as he lunged for him. Jacob forgot the years of solitude and alcohol and nights spent in self-imposed torment as he laughed and grabbed for Kyle’s feet.

As they wrestled, Jacob finally got the upper hand and grabbed Kyle around his waist in a firm grip and pulled him against him. For a moment they froze, looking into each other’s eyes as the laughter died away in the echo of the pool room. Jacob felt a sudden sense of deja vu that caused his hands to lighten his grip. Kyle stared into those eyes and forgot that he was trying to escape. A sense of comfort and longing filled him as he caught his breath, suddenly wishing this moment would never end.

“You… nearly cracked your head open that day,” Jacob said in a whispered, heavy voice.

“What?” Kyle heard what he said but it made no sense to his mind that was too wrapped up in feeling Jacob’s chest on the palms on his hands.

“That day in the summer before our senior year. Remember?” Jacob’s voice sounded foreign in his own ears.

“Yeah.” His smile came easily to his lips as the memory came back to him. “You saved my life.”

Jacob’s face softened and all the love he felt over all the years shown in his eyes as he leaned close to Kyle and whispered, “you saved me first.”

Kyle was too overwhelmed to respond. Jacob’s arms wrapped around his back and drew him into a warm embrace. Kyle’s hands went around to Jacob’s back and held him there as he rested his head on Jacob’s shoulder. His eyes squeezed shut as guilt pierced his heart. For too long he had denied himself this love, thinking it was out of reach or that the passage of time had dissipated its strength only to find it suddenly flood his heart and soul all over again. All week long as he worked his thoughts kept bringing him back here. To his home with this one person who meant more to him than any other man ever did.

Jacob eventually released his hold as he moved back a little in the water and said simply, “we should get going. There’s more to do before the sun goes down.”

Kyle blinked, looking at him with confusion. “More to do?”

A ghost of a smile lifted his lips as he replied, “you did mention wanting to go for a walk. Tomorrow is going to be busy so it’s best to do it now before sunset.” He swam to the edge of the pool and climbed out, waiting for Kyle to follow. As he climbed out, Jacob took his hand and helped him up before they made their way to the showers to wash off the chlorine and change.

They didn’t speak as they dressed in the locker room and headed back out the door. Jacob said goodnight to Corey who smiled and waved back as they departed. Outside, the warmth of the day was waning as the sun began its descent towards the horizon. Jacob seemed to be going out of his way to help Kyle up into the truck before driving them home. There was a comfortable silence between them as they headed back home.

As they pulled up Kyle noticed his dad’s SUV was missing. “Where did he go?” He started reaching for his phone.

“It’s ok,” Jacob said casually. “He’s out having dinner with Andy and Brian.”

Kyle looked over at him, suspiciously. “How do you know?”

He grinned a little to himself and shrugged, trying to look nonchalant. “He mentioned it to me earlier. He probably just took Matt with him.”

“Without a car seat?”

“Uh,” Jacob tried not to laugh. “This may come as a shock to you, but we have had some experience with the whole babies running around the place for a couple years now. We have car seats.”

Kyle relaxed and sat back in the seat as Jacob maneuvered his truck into it’s parking spot next to his workshop. A sudden suspicion came over Kyle but he kept it to himself for the time being. He wondered what else was in store for him tonight. They entered the house, only to discover a note on the kitchen table addressed to Jacob. He picked it up and read it, smiling expectantly before looking over at Kyle.

“What’s it say,” he asked curiously. Without a word, Jacob handed the note to Kyle. He stared at Jacob for a moment wondering what was going on before he looked down to read the note. He frowned slightly at the cryptic message.

Jacob,

It’s there waiting.

Dad.

“What the hell does this mean,” he looked back up at Jacob, expecting an answer.

“There’s something I want you to see.” There was a gentle but serious note to his voice as he walked back to the door and turned to Kyle with a soft smile on his face, holding out his hand. Kyle stood there for a second before moving forward to take his hand and then being lead out of the house.

As Jacob lead him into the groves their hands never parted. “Should I be worried about anything?”

“Do you trust me,” Jacob asked in response.

“Of course.”

“Then just trust me. I promise you won’t regret it.” Kyle felt his emotions gather in his throat. After the unexpected intimacy in the pool and then this new, confident, self-assured Jacob leading him on an all too familiar path seemed like a dream rather than reality. He fell in love with a quiet, unassuming, sometimes shy and withdrawn teenager fourteen years ago. Now, in his place was this man who had attained an inner strength to him that seemed to energize him and only made Kyle want to be near him more than ever before.

The trail was the same as it had always been. A place he once showed Jacob as his favorite spot in the entire orchard. The even rows of trees still weighted with ripening apples gave all of it an almost magical appearance as the ground sloped upwards. Before long they came to the small hill nestled within the orchard. Time seemed to have left it untouched and Kyle could almost imagine he was seventeen again, only this time it was Jacob leading the way with an unassuming confidence.

They came to a stop at the bottom of the somewhat steep hill as Jacob looked at him and asked with challenging look, “think you can still get up there?”

Kyle chuckled softly and started slowly making his way up the hill with Jacob climbing up next to him. As his head came over the top of the small hill, he saw a blanket spread out in the middle of the hill surrounded by the tall grass waving slowly in the breeze. In the center of the blanket was a plain wooden box. Kyle finally found his footing to stand on the hill and walked slowly to the blanket before he knelt down, staring at the box in front of him.

Jacob joined him on the blanket, kneeling directly behind Kyle as he gazed at the box he had crafted himself years ago. “Open it.”

“What is it,” he asked, suddenly finding it hard to take a breath. He could feel his heart thumping in his chest as his hands reached out towards the mysterious object.

Jacob leaned forward a little, letting his hands rest on the tops of Kyle’s thighs. “It’s a box,” Jacob whispered in his ear. “It’s where I’ve kept my best memories over the years. I want you to have it.”

Kyle looked back at him for a moment before his hands slowly took the box, setting it on his lap. His first thought was that it was heavier than he imagined it to be. He settled back slightly, resting against Jacob’s broad chest who was looking over his shoulder as he carefully lifted the lid.

The breath caught in his throat as he opened the box. The first thing he saw was himself. Only it wasn’t him as the person he was now but the teenager he had been all those years ago. Drawn in a simple sketch, he saw himself sitting up against a tree, head tilted slightly back and a small smile on his lips as he looked off into some distance place. The detail amazed him and he wondered when and how Jacob had managed to capture the moment as well as he did. As he lifted the drawing he saw another underneath. Of the two of them, young and staring into each other’s eyes. Kyle felt like he was invading Jacob’s privacy just looking at them. He had noticed him with paper and pencil in his hand numerous times but Jacob had chosen to never share what he was doing in the past. Now, lifting page after page of Jacob’s art left him speechless. He saw drawings of Troy, Brian, Andy and his father as well. Towards the bottom was a drawing Jacob had done of him as he slept in his bed, only a small blanket covering his body from the waist down and yet he could see every line in his body and every small detail.

He felt Jacob’s strong arms wrap around his waist as he came to final drawing. Kyle only barely suppressed a sob as his vision blurred with tears. He blinked a few times to clear his sight. It was a simple drawing but a poignant one. A small child, sleeping in a bed, the same bed he had just slept in the night before. He had never seen a picture of his son so beautiful in his life. “How…?”

“The night after you left him with us,” Jacob whispered softly. “He woke up crying. I got up and laid down with him until he fell asleep. When I woke up in the morning, he was sleeping peacefully and I just… couldn’t help myself. I sat there for about an hour drawing and praying he wouldn’t wake up.”

Kyle could only shake his head softly in amazement. “Why did you want me to see this?”

“I told you before,” he said quietly, his breath tickling Kyle’s ear, sending an electric charge through his body. “You are special to me. You always have been and you always will be.” His arms around Kyle seemed to caress his body only adding to the growing fire within him. “I’ve had a week to think about all this and all I thought about since you left was you. I miss holding you in my arms. I miss feeling you touch me. I miss my best friend who I loved so much I couldn’t tell him for nearly a year and only when he finally worked up the courage to tell me.

“I still love you and I want you in my life again. I know I’m asking for the impossible, I guess. But I still believe in the dreams we had.”

Kyle turned slightly to look into his eyes. A small sliver of uncertainty crept into his heart as he wondered how this would work or if it would just end as disastrously as the last time and his heart and Jacob’s would be broken again. Could he put himself, Jacob and Matt through that? But the love was genuine and he could no longer deny that while Jacob may be totally different from the boy he used to know, he was still the one he fell in love with. The uncertainty inside him died away as quickly as it had sprung up. He wouldn’t let fear of the unknown get in his way again.

Jacob saw the fear creep into Kyle’s eyes and for a moment he thought all of his efforts had failed. His steeled himself for disappointment but he before he could say anything, Kyle’s eyes cleared and he felt him lean in and press his lips to his own. Jacob didn’t bother to stifle the sob of relief that came out of him as they kissed softly on that hill as the sun started to slip over the hills beyond them. Their arms wrapped around each other as they kissed as softly as that first kiss they shared years ago. Fear, pain and all the questions that still needed answered faded away. Their kiss ended as they each leaned back from each other, searching each other’s eyes. Jacob gently pulled Kyle with him as he laid down on his side, knowing after all the day’s activities they could both use a little rest.

Kyle couldn’t stop staring into Jacob’s eyes and his hand gently moved to brush a strand of dark hair away from his face. “Who are you,” he asked in a whisper as a small grin lit his face. “I don’t remember you being this assertive or… confident.”

He cocked an eyebrow as he stared back at him, asking him curiously, “did you like me better when I was a sullen kid who used to flinch whenever someone tried to touch him?”

“That’s not what I meant,” he replied. “I just... never expected it but I’m glad you are who you are now. It feels more… equal now.”

“That’s how it should be,” he said softly as they lay there on their sides, looking at each other and feeling more and more comfortable than they have in a long time. “Kyle, that kid you met and befriended never had a group of friends who cared about him. He went home every night hoping to avoid a beating that he never deserved. He had no hope or any dreams beyond surviving and escaping someday. I worshiped you in the beginning. You really did save my life in ways I can’t ever tell you. And because of you I formed real friendships and a family that I know loves me and supports me.”

Jacob leaned over and kissed him lightly on the cheek, sending another wave of emotions through Kyle’s body that brought a tear to his eyes. Before he could say anything, Jacob’s soft deep voice interrupted him. “I know why you became a lawyer. You wanted to somehow make up for a perceived mistake you made when we were younger. I know you feel guilty about not speaking up when you felt you should and that our special night together was ruined because of my dad.” He laid the back of his fingers gently on Kyle’s cheek as he saw the remembered pain and guilt in his eyes causing a tear to run down. “You were just a kid back then, Kyle. No one expected you to be perfect, least of all me. You don’t owe me or anyone else anything.”

Kyle’s mind replayed that night in his mind from telling Jacob he loved him to seeing him fall on the kitchen floor. “If I had done the right thing…” His head dropped to avoid having to look at Jacob.

Jacob put his fingers on Kyle’s chin and lifted his head back up. “Let it go,” Jacob whispered to him as his arm supported him. “You have to stop punishing yourself.”

“I remember when I opened the door,” Kyle said in a remorseful voice, “and saw you there. And I knew it was all my fault.” Kyle buried his face in Jacob’s chest, feeling the tears stinging his eyes.

“No, it wasn’t,” he said. “Do you honestly think I blamed you or anyone else blamed you? Kyle, I was so out of it after he nearly beat me to death I don’t even remember walking. I could’ve gone to get help but instead of going to the police or the hospital, I went to you. I loved you more than anyone else in the whole world and I still do. And, while you think of all the bad things that happened, I remember all the good things. That you didn’t back away from me when you saw my scars and the bruises. That you loved me because of me and when I needed you, you stayed with me so I never felt lost or scared or alone.” He held Kyle in his arms. All the times they shared in the past when he had felt small and weak went through his mind. How many times he had leaned on Kyle without him even knowing it. It was a cathartic moment for them both and after awhile, Kyle seemed returned to normal. Jacob held onto him for a few moments longer, lightly kissing his cheek as Kyle lay there, in his own way replaying all those moments.

“I’m sorry I reacted like that,” he said as he slowly separated himself from Jacob and sat up, wiping his eyes. He felt a little embarrassed after his outburst of emotions he hadn’t meant to feel. He hadn’t thought about that dark moment in his life since college and remembering it today brought back unwanted feelings he had tried to suppress over the years. But maybe letting it all out was the better choice to make.

“Don’t be sorry,” Jacob said as he sat up to put a hand on his shoulder. “I should have said some of this years ago but I either didn’t have the chance or I was too young. You’re not the only one who was scared of confronting the uncomfortable topics back then, you know.”

They laid there silently for a few moments, holding each other. “It’s getting dark,” he said as he started to stand up.

“Are you hungry,” Jacob asked as he stood up with him, grabbing the box in his hand.

Kyle chuckled. “God, I just now noticed how starved I am now that you mentioned it.”

Jacob grabbed the blanket and threw it over his shoulder before he took his hand. “Let’s get down without breaking anything and then I’ll cook you dinner. Something light after the long day.”

They carefully slid down the side of the hill, Kyle thinking it felt steeper now than it used to. As they started heading back towards the house, he felt the need to ask, “when is Dad coming home with Matt?”

Jacob kept his face neutral but a small tick on his lips betrayed him as he casually said, “Oh… whenever I tell him he can.”

Kyle’s lips pressed into a thin line as the final piece of the puzzle fell into place. “You planned all of this. The Gym, the pool, up on the hill..?”

Jacob pulled him close and kissed him lightly under his ear before muttering, “guilty.”

Kyle chuckled as they continued walking. “A vast conspiracy, I guess.”

“I wouldn’t say vast,” he defended playfully. “Just me, Dad and Brian.”

“Oh? Troy and Andy have no clue,” he wondered allowed as they continued to walk.

“Kyle…” he sighed with feigned exasperation. “Brian is involved. Half the people in town probably know by now.” They both laughed as the walked up to the house.

The sun had set by the time they go to the back door. The glowing green etching in it still fascinated Kyle. “I still can’t believe you did this.”

Jacob smiled with unabashed pride. “I’m hoping Dad will let me do the front doors next year.”

“If you need help talking him into it, let me know.” He opened the door and walked inside, finally letting go of Jacob’s hand and then only reluctantly.

“Let me put this stuff away and I’ll be back to get dinner,” Jacob said as he took the box and blanket and hurried upstairs.

Kyle opted to look in the fridge for a bottled water before sitting himself down at the table. Smirking coyly to himself, he pulled out his cellphone and sent a brief text to Brian. “I hope you’re pleased with yourself.” He only waited a few moments before the response came back which prompted a quick back and forth.

“You should be enjoying your date.”

“He’s upstairs right now. Coming back down in a sec to make dinner.”

“Can Matt stay over tonight? He and Blake are having lots of fun together and I don’t want to make him leave if he doesn’t have to.”

Kyle chuckled to himself before responding. “Yeah. It’s ok if he’s ok with it. Where’s Dad?”

“Sitting next to me. He says get off your phone and pay attention to your date.”

“Ok. Love you. And thanks.”

“We love you to.” He put his phone away dutifully and drank his water just as Jacob returned to the kitchen and immediately setting about his newest task.

“So, Matt is staying the night at Andy and Brian’s,” he informed Jacob.

Jacob grinned, “It would be interesting watching the three of them grow up together.”

Kyle smiled a little brighter. “Really? He does seem rather attached to Blake.”

Jacob shrugged slightly, “just telling you what I’ve noticed. I think Blake saw how shy Matt was in the beginning and he just took him in hand and included him in everything he was doing. Blake’s like that. He likes making people happy. I think it’s from Stacy and Andy fighting a lot the last year or so. Things got kind of ugly towards the end.”

“When was their divorce final,” Kyle asked with a slight frown. Unlike the others, he never thought much of Stacy and wasn’t at all surprised with how their marriage turned out even if Andy had been straight.

“Back in May, I think,” He started cooking up two small sirloin steaks on the big cast iron skillet as he moved around, preparing vegetables and other things to go with them.

“Can I ask how bad it got?”

Jacob glanced over at him as his eyes darkened slightly. “Honestly? He wouldn’t say but I think she was hitting him. I think she figured out how to trigger him so he’d be helpless and she’d just wail on him.”

Hate was an emotion Kyle wasn’t fond of but hearing what happened to Andy made his fist clench as he wished nothing but pain and misery on her. “Fucking cunt. How did he get it to stop?”

“He didn’t,” Jacob said flatly. “I did. About a year ago, I think. He still won’t tell me exactly what happened but I figured out enough that one day I went over there, packed up the kids and told her if she wasn’t out of the house by the next day I was gonna throw her fat ass out myself. Thought Andy was gonna shit himself.”

Kyle looked at Jacob in a new light. Watching him cook and talking candidly about some of the things he’s missed. “How did you know?”

Jacob snorted with a rueful smile but his tone was light and casual. “I know abuse when I see it. I’d been on the receiving end enough times when I was a kid to notice things. Andy’s my friend and I wasn’t going to keep quiet about it. God only knows what the kids saw. And, just so we’re clear, no one else knows any of it either. Yeah, she was cheating on him and that gave him a good enough reason to divorce her but I doubt he wanted it known that he was also suffering from spousal abuse.”

Kyle nodded in understanding. “We’ll file that under attorney/client privilege,” he said with a smirk which got him a quiet chuckle from Jacob. He watched Jacob working away over the stove, looking to be very determined in his work. Thinking over what he just learned about his friends, it got him wondering what else he didn’t know after all the time that has passed between them. Would he have done anything differently in Jacob’s place? Probably not, though he would have had to be here to do it and he wasn’t anymore.

He used to take a small measure of comfort in the peace his solitude offered when he was separated from his family. It was easy to let the day slip away once he was home with Matthew and just enjoy their time together. But, he was getting older. He would be four in two months and Kyle felt a sense of unease as he thought the older Matt got, the more he would need from his only parent. Would long work hours and days spent doing depositions and court appearances and working late at home affect him negatively? None of that was an issue when he was growing up. He came home every day to his father who was always there, either in the house or out in the groves tending to the trees. But he was never absent or distant or too busy to spend time with him. Could he give his own son the same life he had growing up?

“You got real quiet over there,” Jacob’s voice broke through his thoughts and he had a sudden and odd feeling of guilt in him. “What’s on your mind?”

“Just… thinking,” Kyle offered weakly.

“Uh, huh,” Jacob was unconvinced as he glanced behind his shoulder to look at him. “Wanna try that again? What’s on your mind?”

“Just thinking about Matt and how he’s going to grow up,” he said a little closer to the truth this time. He sighed and frowned to himself, knowing he wasn’t being fair to Jacob. “Ok, that and wondering if I can be a good parent to him.”

Jacob stopped what he was doing and turned to regard him. “What makes you think you can’t?”

“I have a hard job,” he shrugged helplessly, “I’m a single parent and I’m not going to be home when he comes home from school every day like I had when I was a kid. I’m going to have a lot of work with cases and doing interviews and court appearances and…” he sighed. “I won’t be able to be there for him all the time.”

“So, what’s the solution,” Jacob asked simply.

“I don’t know,” he replied.

Jacob was silent for a moment before saying, “how about we cross that bridge when we come to it?” He reached into a cabinet and pulled out a couple plates down before grabbing a kitchen towel to pull some rolls out of the oven.

“Guess so,” he said. Pointedly ignoring the mention of a “we” involved in the decision making. His eyes gazed back up at Jacob and wondered if that was still a possibility. He wanted to believe it was.

“Let’s just enjoy dinner tonight. We can solve all the world’s problems tomorrow.” Spooning stir fried vegetables onto each plate before placing a steak on each, he smiled as he sat the first plate in front of Kyle before preparing his own. Grabbing a couple knives and forks for the both of them before sitting down next to him.

“Smells good,” Kyle said as he cut into the juicy steak.

“I got a way with food,” he grinned as he stabbed his fork into the vegetables.

Kyle just smirked and started to eat. He enjoyed every bite and the company was even more enjoyable. Occasionally, they would both look up at each other causing Kyle to feel a small spark somewhere inside him. As Jacob looked at Kyle he felt a warm flush inside his chest. It was an old, familiar feeling that he hadn’t felt for anyone in years. Only Kyle brought this out in him. Made him feel lighter, easier. He just hoped after tonight, some of Kyle’s concerns will be eased.

They finished their dinner in silence before Jacob picked up the empty plates and set them in the sink. Once that was done he turned to Kyle and asked, “is there anything else you wanted to do tonight?”

“You’ve already impressed me for one day, I think,” he said with a slightly nervous laugh. “How about we just watch a movie and lay on the sofa?”

Jacob gave him a relaxed smile and nodded. “Go ahead and pick one out. I’ll join you after I text Dad and clean up in here.”

Kyle stood and closed the distance between them, giving Jacob a soft kiss. “Thank you for all this. I had a great time.”

“Kyle... “ His eyes sparkled under the light in the room as he said, “I think I love you more now than I ever did years ago.”

“I think,” he blushed slightly at Jacob’s words. “I think you might not be the only one who could say that.”

Their hands touched for a moment and time seemed to stand still for them. Kyle had become so used to being the one to lead when it came to relationships. Now, it felt like Jacob was pursuing him and he wasn’t sure how to handle it. He decided to just relax and enjoy their time together. The future can wait one more night. “Go,” Jacob whispered with a hint of a smile on his lips. “I’ll be there with you before you know it.”

Kyle reluctantly let go of him and walked out of the kitchen and headed to the living room to pick out a movie. He pondered the choices on Netflix and decided to watch “Sweet Home Alabama.” He smirked a little, thinking it might be appropriate for the night. He settled down onto the couch facing the screen and waited a few moments, hearing the sounds of water running in the kitchen before the house became silent once again. He could hear Jacob walking through the hallway, turning the lights off as he made his way to the living room.

“We ready,” he asked Kyle with a pleasant look before turning the lights off in the room.

“Yup.”

“Good.” Jacob finished and joined Kyle on the couch before they started up the movie, the only light in the room now coming from the screen. As the opening scene started to play Jacob chuckled silently. “Let’s get comfy.” Gently putting a hand around Kyle’s waist he pulled him down, laying behind him on the sofa. As big as Jacob was Kyle found that they could both lay together without feeling cramped. It was something they hadn’t done since they were together years ago, watching movies in the dark when no one else was around. Kyle rested his head on the arm of the sofa, feeling a strong arm under his neck meeting the other arm around his chest.

Kyle sighed and smiled to himself, feeling relaxed. He snorted silently to himself, realizing he hadn’t been this relaxed in years. He couldn’t think of anything that could ruin this moment. Feeling Jacob’s warm, strong body pressed against him gave him a comfort and sense of peace he could honestly admit he never thought he would find again. Even holding Matt in his arms had never felt this good. He didn’t feel defensive anymore or guarded. Didn’t need to carefully choose his words to avoid sharing more than he wanted. The dark wings that used to flutter and close over his heart had been banished from him with just a willingness to trust again and to allow himself to be loved.

Jacob’s arms squeezed him slightly for a moment before he whispered close to his ear, “what are you laughing about?”

The voice was so soft and solicitous. Jacob wasn’t trying to pry information from him or trying to do anything other than ask to be included in this thoughts. It no longer occured to Kyle to avoid the answer. “Just thinking I’d never felt this peaceful in a long time. And you, planning all this, just for me.”

“Not just for you,” he said, added a small peck on Kyle’s ear. “For us.”

“I never want this feeling to end.” He moved his hand over Jacob’s that was resting on his chest.

“It doesn’t have to,” he replied lovingly. “But, let’s just focus on tonight. We can worry about tomorrow tomorrow.”

“Do you love Matthew?”

“With all my heart. Just like how you love him.”

Kyle said no more. He heard what he wanted to hear. The bond between the two of them seemed new and yet the same all at once. He wanted to do more now. He wanted to say everything in his heart. But Jacob was right. It can all wait until tomorrow.

The time passed between them quietly. The comforting feeling of home and Jacob’s embrace lulled Kyle into a tranquil state. He watched the movie but his heart was focused on feeling this new yet old love that surrounded him like a soft warm blanket. He didn’t think about his work that lay ahead of him or his friends’ problems or the past. The past was the least of his thoughts. It all seemed so small and petty now. All he cared about was being next to Jacob and staying there for as long as he would have him.

The sound of the back door opening caught his attention and his head shifted as he detected footsteps coming into the house. Kyle smirked a little and remained where he was. Maybe in the past he may have separated himself from Jacob, not wanting to be judged on how their appearance looked but tonight he didn’t care. The footsteps got closer until he could hear them in the doorway to the room. Without looking back to see, Kyle smiled and said softly, “hi, Dad.”

His father stepped carefully into the room and leaned down to regard the two men on the couch. His bearded face broke out into a gentle smile as he regarded, in his heart, his two sons. They looked like the two boys who fell in love so many years ago that made him so proud and happy for them both. He had been completely supportive of Jacob’s plan for the night the moment he asked him about it. To David, it was possibly the best chance for them to rekindle their feelings for each other so he made sure it was planned out carefully and where they couldn’t plan, he just prayed for luck. His eyes went from Jacob’s face to Kyle’s before he whispered, “looks like you wore him out, son.”

Kyle carefully turned to look back and Jacob only to see his eyes closed and face in a peaceful state of sleep. “He had a long day I guess,” he whispered as he turned slowly back to his father.

David nodded in agreement. “Did you have a good time today?”

“Yes and no,” he replied thoughtfully.

“Oh?” David gave his son a curious look, silently asking him to explain.

“I had a great time and everything was perfect,” he said softly. “But I hate that it took me this long to see what I had been missing.”

David nodded slowly in understanding. “We all make mistakes, son. Not a one of us is perfect. Doesn’t mean we can’t fix things when the chance comes along though.”

“I have a lot to think about,” Kyle said candidly. “I need to rethink some things in my life and what I want to do.”

“Take all the time you need, Baby Boy,” he said with his usual warm fatherly voice. “We love you and will support you no matter what you decide. Especially him.” David pointed to the sleeping man behind Kyle.

Thoughts of Matt growing up here seemed less stressful to him than when he thought about raising Matt alone. “You think Jacob would…?”

“Son,” David cut him off, knowing where his thoughts were leading, “I got lucky with you having to raise you on my own. I had to make some sacrifices you probably don’t know about. If Matthew has a chance of having a home where he has two parents instead of one,” his eyes glanced to Jacob’s face before looking back at Kyle, “it can only be a good thing.”

Kyle stared thoughtfully at the floor. It would be a major life change. He still has a killer to find and put in jail. In his heart, he knows he can’t walk away from that. He’d never forgive himself if he did. But, maybe after that…? His eyes looked back up to his father who was looking at him with that ever present, gentle, understanding patient look of his. Kyle smiled up at him as he said in halted whisper, “I love you, Dad.”

David slowly knelt down and leaned over and gently kissed his forehead. “Always and forever,” he whispered before he stood up and said quietly, “I’m going to go get some work done in my office and then going to bed. Don’t let him sleep down here too long.” Seeing Kyle nodding in reply he quietly left the room, leaving the two of them alone again.

Kyle turned again slowly until he was facing Jacob. His eyes took in every detail of the sleeping face. Every line and every muscle down to his perfect nose and his dark eyebrows. The thought that he would have to leave again to return to his job and that other life now wasn’t a pleasant one. He wished he could stay. Be here forever. With this person he had found love with again. Without thinking, he pressed his lips against Jacob’s, wanting to remember how it felt.

Jacob stirred and made a small grunt as his eyes fluttered open. Becoming aware of his surroundings and realizing he had fallen asleep, his arms clutched Kyle closer to him as he attempted to speak, “Oh.. God… I’m… I fell asleep. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to.”

“It’s ok,” he assured him softly, unable to stop himself from kissing Jacob again and getting a small reaction in return. “I couldn’t resist.”

“Is Dad back yet,” he asked as he rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand slightly.

“In his study now. He said he’ll head to bed in an hour or so.”

“We should to after the movie is over,” he muttered, his eyes focusing on Kyle’s face while his hand rubbed his back softly.

“Movie ended a little while ago,” he grinned.

Jacob looked a little crestfallen. “Oh, Fuck. I’m sorry, Kyle. I wanted this night to be perfect for us and I fell asleep through the end.”

“Whoa, whoa whoa,” Kyle stopped him with a stern look but kept his voice soft. “I thought we agreed no more ‘I’m sorry’s.’” Jacob opened his mouth to stay something before closing it again. His cheeks tinted slightly pink under his tanned skin. “You’re not perfect and the entire day was wonderful. You don’t have anything to be worried about.”

“So, you’re saying you had a good time today,” Jacob said as he pulled Kyle closer so their bodies pressed together.

Kyle smiled, staring into Jacob’s eyes for a moment before he kissed Jacob again. This time, it wasn’t a sweet, gentle kiss but a deep, soulful kiss that Jacob wasn’t expecting. He gasped and grunted in surprise as he felt Kyle’s tongue invade his mouth with such passion and intensity his body went limp for a moment in shock. When he felt Kyle’s hand running up the back of his neck and into his hair he quickly recovered and responded with equal force. The surprised gasp turning into a low moan of desire that had gone unfulfilled for years. As quickly as the moment started, it ended just as fast as Kyle pulled away from his lips, leaving Jacob feeling weak, surprised and aroused all at once.

“Do you believe me now,” Kyle asked him. A small smile playing across his lips.

“Ok. I won’t ask anymore,” Jacob grinned as they stared into each other’s eyes.

“You wanna just go ahead and head to bed,” Kyle asked him, wanting to be helpful.

“Yeah, I guess we should,” he grunted as he let go of Kyle and stood up with Kyle rising next to him.

They turned the TV off and headed upstairs to their rooms. Kyle hadn’t really given it much thought but he was suddenly hoping and maybe even expecting Jacob to join him in his room. When they got to his door, Jacob kept walking past him and to his own bedroom door. Kyle felt a little odd suddenly, wondering why he didn’t even ask. He looked over at Jacob and thought about saying something. He would give anything to get to feel him sleeping next to him like they had years ago.

“Goodnight, Kyle.” Jacob gave him a small smirk before he went into his room, shutting the door behind him.

Kyle brushed off the feeling of disappointment knowing that there would be other nights. Better nights when they both don’t feel weighed down by fatigue. He closed the door and turned towards the bed. Sitting in the middle of the bed was the wooden box with the drawings hidden inside. He sat on the bed, looking at it for a moment before opening it up again to see the drawings resting within. In his mind’s eye, he replayed those moments on the hill. Gently closing the lid, he picked up the box and sat it on the corner of the small dresser. Someday, he would need to find a proper place for the priceless gift he had been given. For now, he would keep it as close as possible.