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Skinny's Sorry


skinnydragon

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First, I’m sorry if I caused any trouble on GA. That was never my intention.

 

No one wants to read about another person’s illness, so I’ll make this brief.
Last Tuesday morning I went to our emergency room due to strong abdominal pains. After a scan, the ER doctor told me I have stage 4 pancreatic cancer; it had already spread to my abdomen wall and into my liver. I’m a realist, and there is only one prognosis – which is obvious. It’s just a matter of how long.

 

The rest of the week was spent in a larger hospital on a ‘medical campus.’ During that time, I was mostly doped up and out of it. Only when I got home did my friends find and old laptop and connect it to our internet.
I check into the ‘cancer hospital’ of that medical campus on Wednesday morning for a final test and hopefully a realistic appraisal of how much time I have left. It’s the only question that means anything, yet is the one they don’t want to answer. I guess it interferes with their sales pitch or something.

 

I always thought cancer was something I didn’t have to worry about until I was older, especially this one. But it seems when you’re younger it is more common for it to be discovered in late stages because your body is strong enough to hide any symptoms.

 

I can only write when I’m in pain. Then I take my knockout drop and fade away. This blog entry was written in Word, over five cycles so I could post it now.

 

Thanks for all the good wishes sent my way, and thank-you to AC, who takes friendships seriously. OK, that's all I can write right now.

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21 hours ago, ColumbusGuy said:

I know this is far too late, but I didn't find this until palantir sent me the link...I first heard the news from an email sent by AC, and I signed onboard for a plan of his....

Is there any further news?  I imagine skinny is gone now, with stage 4 cancer...and I'm on the verge of tears just thinking of him. 

I ran across the results of cancer at a young age--six years old--when my mom's father died of it.  He had always been active and I remember fishing with him, and he gave me my first haircut--a buzz of course, since it was 1964.  There was nothing to be done back then for lung cancer, so he spent his last year or so at home on oxygen and pain medications.  His bed was set up in their living room so he wouldn't have to deal with stairs, and it was terrible to just see him waste away week by week.  By the end, it was hard to believe he was the same man I loved so much.

SD's reviews and chats were always the high-light of my day...and his stories kept me on the edge of my seat with almost every chapter.  GA is a sadder place without his work, and the void he's left in my heart will never be healed.  I better stop now...I'm starting to cry.

Ave atque vale, my dear friend!

 

I hope it's not like that for SkinnyD. I have seen people, younger ones got out of serious conditions of cancer. Fighting against it would be a hell,  but his life worth living. All he need is support from us all. Prayers from us all. I was waiting for his reply and will gonna wait till end. 

Edited by Emi GS
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6 minutes ago, Drew Espinosa said:

@Mikiesboy Your poem, Our Father?, really touched me. :hug: I am an atheist, but I've grown up in a religious environment, and so I've always heard how God works in mysterious ways, how he is all-good, how he loves all his children. But I look at the world, see the disease, starvation, and war that ravages the world, and I think; If there is a god, he isn't all-good, he doesn't love us all, and the mysterious ways line is utter bull.

 

I'm reminded of this quote:

 

But... I do wish that there is a loving god that watches over us, that there is a heaven for all of us, because Skinny deserves peace after having his life cut so short.

Maybe not that heaven Drew.. maybe a Valhalla or Shangri-la. Maybe we do have souls, maybe there is more... maybe the mormons are right.. who knows...but i hope if there is more that he's at peace too.  God's working in Mysterious ways is like Microsoft's releases except without the patch a week later - It's messed up and a way to excuse bad behaviour and things that didn't come to pass.  I like what you posted.. it's brilliant!  Thanks for reading and your comments.  I'm working my way through but can only do so in small doses.. it's too hard and Mike will want to know why i'm bawling.  So I will get to yours soon xoxo

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42 minutes ago, Mikiesboy said:

 God's working in Mysterious ways is like Microsoft's releases except without the patch a week later 

So well put...

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