[dkstories] Dreams of a Father

[Ratatosk]

Yay

 

A new chapter - and new surprises?? Let see

[TheDaniel]

Yay!

[Ratatosk]

To quote myself

Yay

 

A new chapter - and new surprises?? Let see

Were there surprises? Yeah big ones!

 

Will they ever meet?

 

This smells civil war! :battleaxe: :nuke: :battleaxe: :mace:

 

What do the Prophet know?

 

I say just one word: EVIL Dan EVIL

[TheDaniel]

Surprises indeed. :-)

 

 

A second virus to kill the Republics leadership? I guess Garret is the right person to stop this plan, but I'm not sure if it's only coincidence and the suitability of his ship, that he has been chosen to provide transport. There's also the question how he'll be able to get back into the republic, if he stops this evil plan too obvious.

 

Then Paul... Things look pretty good for him, but I get more and more the impression, that there's a different faction at work. Maybe even the prophet himself, on a hunt to purge the foul parts of his own clergy?

 

 

Great chapter, but only more questions, no answers.

 

Daniel

[dkstories]

Surprises? You ain't seen nothing yet.

[TheDaniel]

Surprises? You ain't seen nothing yet.

Tease!

 

I surely don't qualify as an editor but sometimes one gets jealous...

Ok, knowing the unedited stories of some German authors, I know that solely spell checking can be quite stressing, so disregard that. It's only the addiction.

[Demetz]

Many interesting twists in this chapter... looking forward to more

[NaperVic]

Surprises? You ain't seen nothing yet.

 

Ohhh, maybe like one of those surprise two chapter weeks?

 

Vic

[dkstories]

One very big thing that worried me in this story was the changes in Points of View. We've got one large over-arching storyline that has components happening in several locations. That was one of the reasons why the story was delayed so long...I kept on debating about showing what was going on with Paul versus going over it through backstory, and the same with Alex (Harrington) and Bill. There wasn't enough for each of them to have their own, full stories and when I tried to write it out so each were in separate chapters, the story really suffered (mostly from too short chapters). By putting in the scenes as they're 'happening' in relative time along with each other was the solution I settled on, and I worry still that it will get confusing for people...

 

Never mind the parts of the story that are going on that I can't show but have to keep in the back of my head, that when Garret is doing A, Torrellini is over there doing C while Alex is doing B and Bill's stuck with Ilyana doing D,E, & F. Then Paul's got his own little world going on where Frederick's being a bitch and some adults that he has no hope of tricking are weaving him into his plots. Plus, let's not forget that Archbishop Alroy is out there with his plans, as well as the others represented by the presence of Joshua in Paul's company.

 

Damn this story is complicated.

 

Maybe I should go back to RIch boy...ah hell, that's even worse in book 3. Nm.

[TalonRider]

It will all work out in the end. I think that Paul is slowly being put into a position where Garret will be able to get to him easier when the time comes. I'm also beginning to think that Frederick is becoming a lost cause and he won't be going back. I've not read anything to tell me otherwise.

 

Garret is being put between a rock and a hard place in making this delivery.

[TheDaniel]

I'm not sure about Frederick being a lost cause. But it's definitely sad that he shows no empathy for his cousin.

 

About the changes in the POV. I have no problem with the different viewpoints. Yet... . How to tell a story, if there are (many) parallel happenings, must be a common problem. At the moment I agree with Dan's choice of a common timeline with different POVs, when something important happens.

 

As a somewhat negative example I can name Peter F. Hamilton's Night's Dawn Trilogy. The story has many, many different storylines, all developing simultaneously. He choose to revolve each chapter solely around one main character. Changing the POV only form chapter to chapter.

The problem is there are so many storylines, that there are often many chapters between two with the same POV, where one storyline is continued. I sometimes had problems remembering what happened last, where the story was left oft. Also it was annoying when one chapter was really thrilling, the chapter ended with a cliffhangar and there where a lots of (not so interesting) chapters, until the strand was continued.

 

With the thought that Dan has put into the problem I'm quite hopeful, that he choose the right solution for this wonderful story.

 

BTW: Where's the next chapter?