Hitting a woman

[Tiger]

Here is what I believe. I believe that under most circumstances, it is wrong to hit anyone. I honestly don't see any difference between hitting another guy and hitting a woman. It is generally wrong regardless of gender. However, I'm not just going to stand back and let someone turn me into a punching bag, nor am I going to stand back and let a person hurt someone I love. Under those circumstances, I have no qualms about hitting someone, regardless of gender. I'll kick 'em too, even in the groin in that's what it takes. However, as long as people leave me and people I love alone, I will not resort to violence.

 

I chose, "Normally yes, but a man shouldn't allow a woman to hit him or someone he loves."

[John Doe]

I chose, "Normally yes, but a man shouldn't allow a woman to hit him or someone he loves."

 

I agree with most of what you said. I agree that it's wrong to hit anyone male or female. I also agree that if push comes to shove and someone tried to hit or harm me or people I care about, yes I will hit that person regardless of sex. So with that in regards I believe it is not wrong to hit a woman. I am an equal opportunity hitter. I do not discrimnate towards sex, age (well this one here is kinda tricky), sexual orientation, gender, religion, creed, race. etc. I would gladly show them the microscopic cells of my knuckles and fists up close.

[Nephylim]

I think what would be more appropriate to say is that somone who is considerably stronger than the other person should not take advantage of their size and strength to hurt the other person.

 

If the man does not have a significant size/weight advantage to the woman then there is no reason why not especially if the woman is being aggresive or violent. if it is the case that teh woman is much smaller I think the man shoudl walk away unless it's impossible in which case if attacked then of course they should fight back but they should be wary of their physcal attraction.

 

What I don't agree with is the wimps who whine to me that they hit their wives/girlfriends becasue she 'was asking for it' or 'provoked' him. If he is that unhappy with what she's doing/saying then get the hell out of there, dont react with fists.

[Tiger]

I'm curious. Who chose the third option?

[Mark Arbour]

I think what would be more appropriate to say is that somone who is considerably stronger than the other person should not take advantage of their size and strength to hurt the other person.

 

If the man does not have a significant size/weight advantage to the woman then there is no reason why not especially if the woman is being aggresive or violent. if it is the case that teh woman is much smaller I think the man shoudl walk away unless it's impossible in which case if attacked then of course they should fight back but they should be wary of their physcal attraction.

 

What I don't agree with is the wimps who whine to me that they hit their wives/girlfriends becasue she 'was asking for it' or 'provoked' him. If he is that unhappy with what she's doing/saying then get the hell out of there, dont react with fists.

 

You makes some excellent points.

 

I picked the middle option. Visualize a toxic couple I once knew (who are thankfully no longer together). They know how to piss each other off, and when they do, the woman, who is weaker, hits the man (not a tap, I mean she attacks him), and he's so pissed off already he lets go and really punches her. Then she parades her black eye around and has a pity party.

 

What did I learn? Relationships, especially twisted ones, are too complex to have simple right and wrong answers.

[John Doe]

I chose the third option. Heh just for giggles. I work in a place filled with feminist extremist and I like to say things like that just to tickle their bones. We joke about stuff like that all the time now and I couldn't resist the temptation. But Nephy is right. I would have to agree with her. I'm a smaller guy and things like that doesn't really cross my mind. Hence I was effy about the age thing because that was the thing that was bothering me I just didn't know exactly why, but as soon as I read Nephy's comment it clicked. Though I may be 23 and if some 16 year old comes up to me picking a fight and makes an attempt to hit me or any of my friends, I'll hit the kid if he or she is larger than me. 16 year old guys are getting huge these days.... dang world of physical poweress and muscle buidling obession. It's not hard to outweight or outsize me. But if I was a buff guy or expert hand to hand combat person I would show long restaint and patience. Not necessary to hurt someone when you are in deed the superior one in physical poweress.

[Cia]

I will defend myself if attacked by anyone. I'm not big, I'm not small and I do know how to defend myself quite well. Honestly I'm of the view that if someone hits me they earned a response. If it's someone I can take down with a puch or a throw I will, if they are bigger or I feel I need to I'll play dirty. I don't pick fights, never did, but in my family I grew up knowing that I would finish them. I've fought guys and girls *shrugs* Though not for many many years. Now a scathing verbal response typically works

[TetRefine]

Story time! Back in 7th grade there was this girl who lived around the corner from me and we went to the same bus stop throughout middle school. For whatever reason we hated each other and aggravated each other constantly. Well this had been going on for about three months and I was starting to get really fed up with her. So one day she took my seat on the bus (which was a big no no back then. Stupid, but thats just how it was). I got angry and called her a 'ginger bitch'. She then got up from the seat and slashed her razor sharp fingernails across my cheek and gave me a big cut. I got so angry that I punched her in the side of her face and knocked her over. I got an hour and a half detention and a long lecture from the principal as to how hitting girls is wrong. She didn't get in trouble at all because apparently she was the victim. But we all know it was because she was a girl. When my dad found out, he grabbed me by the arm and forcefully sat me down on my bed and gave me a lecture as to how it is not acceptable at any time to hit a girl and that I should have just walked away.

 

The funny thing is about two months after that happened, I became friends with her throughout the rest of middle school and through the beginning of high school. And now I heard she's an out of the closet lesbian. Hehe, a gay kid and lesbo going at it in middle school.

 

 

So, my opinion on the whole thing. There are very little instances when it is ok to hit a girl. The vast majority of the time, the guy is strong enough to just get away or just hold the woman in place so she can't attack. Also, most men I know will look down upon and consider weak another man who hits a woman. It's a rule so ingrained in our culture that it won't being going anywhere anytime soon.

[Aeroplane]

Its never acceptable to hit anyone unless defending yourself. I apply that policy equally across genders because if someone hits you, they should be prepared to deal with the consequences or they should not have hit you.

 

Some people think you should never (no exceptions) hit a woman, which I find ridiculous. That school of thought stems from the idea that women are all weak little creatures who should be protected by a big strong champion of a man. This is insulting to women, men and clearly not true.

[PrivateTim]

I didn't vote because my answer isn't there.

 

The answer is no, it isn't wrong to hit a woman any more than it is wrong to hit a man, it all depends on the circumstances.

 

I was taught as a child not to let anyone get away with hitting me, boy or girl, but I was also taught not to give worse than I was getting, so I think Matt was right in reacting to the girl who scratched him, but maybe not a punch, just a slap.

 

A small guy, who for whatever reason decided he wanted to hit me, wouldn't get beat up by me, he'd get neutralized, the same goes for a woman.

 

Now touch a family member and all bets are off, I am much better at controlling my emotions if I am attacked than a loved one.

 

What did I learn? Relationships, especially twisted ones, are too complex to have simple right and wrong answers.

[Hoskins]

I grew up with two mean sisters who would use the "don't hit a girl" thing against me ALL THE TIME. When I was really young, my dad came down on me for hitting my younger sister, and those bitches found out what he told me. I wasn't safe for years after that. They'd hit, and scratch, and just generally beat the crap out of me and if I told, I'd get it even worse. My dad saw what was going on when I was a teenager though, and gave me shit for taking it from them.

 

From that day on, if one of my sisters hit me, I hit them back with exactly the same level of force, or as close as I could get. My sister once punched me in the face. So I punched her in the face (totally freaked her out. It was GREAT). My other sister kicked me in the nads once. I punched her in the boob (I'm not going to kick anyone in the crotch, I don't fight that dirty). Also, I was on my way to the floor and her chest was right there.

 

What did I learn from this? That I don't have a problem with a proportional response, and yeah, I'll hit a girl/woman if they hit me first. Especially if its my sister.

[hh5]

Difficult issue.

 

1) If it was children involved then really both need to be taught how to play with each other or not to play at all

I say both kids are at fault because they are young to dealing with their emotions so both need to learn a few things.

 

2) If it were Teens involved

Still comes with #1 but the real reason behind the above subject - is that boys are generally physical with their anger

 

But still if the two are having issues - they should bring it up with a councilor or their parents

 

Ultimately the fight will bring the parents instantly in and the matter will be heated and opinionated

 

3) If both are adults then its a matter of what everyone brought up

 

In the wild - there are aggressors - and there are the dominate figure in the pack.

 

This is very true with children or teen or adults.

 

It this happen at work - both employees are in big trouble

If its a couple - then it could lead to some form of divorce.

 

If its neighbors then it becomes a hillbilly war.

 

 

The big issue is that its provoked verbally or physically.

 

Both sides need to learn that this heated emotional standoff - maybe wrong on both sides.

 

Gosh that girl and her nails and the kid that hit her - both need their issue corrected.

Its fortunate that a wakeup call by being hit - settled things

It could also be maybe she did get a lecture from her parents.

 

Its sometimes is a natural thing that difference are settled physically.

Its the practice of the animal nature.

Sometimes there is discovery that comes out of a fight.

Sometimes there is nothing discovered and it becomes a feud.

 

This nature of bullying - happens too many times in life.

Its really wrong but it happens

 

I think the bottomline - differences needs to be settled

 

Both are out of Harmony with each other.

 

It could be the leader of the Pack issue.

It could be a silly fight or issue.

It could be a tradition of how to settle things

 

But the bottomline what would it take for matter to be resolved.

 

Is it settled by animal nature? or human nature?

[Y_B]

I find it ironic that many women, especially feminists, spend great efforts to promote equality in society and the work place but when it comes to defending one's self in the face of adversary, whether physical or not, they pull the "women" card.

 

The truism of "can't hit a girl" is outdated to me. Personally, I do not and will not resort to physical violence, but my inactions do not excuse one from being deserving of the action. Under the circumstances, I can watch a boy or a girl get decked in the face without blinking an eye.

Edited June 16, 2010 by Yang Bang

[Jack Frost]

If s/he hits me, s/he should not expect me to hold back, depending on the situation. Especially if s/he hits my face.

 

I rarely hit people. Last time I did it was when I punched my ex in the arms a few times a few years ago. He deserved it for mocking my hearing impairment because I hadn't known the subway line was closed and we were walking a longer route to our destination. I just didn't understand the announcement in the green line subway then. He got pissy at me for no reason because I was saying over and over "we would get there faster if we transfer to the orange line." And he went to tell me the orange line was shut down due to an emergency. I was like "Oh... I didn't know... I didn't understand the radio announcement then and thought it was nothing" And I got "That's because you can't HEAR!" comment from him.

 

Guess what that prick did? Walked fast away from me, dared to feel humiliated for being punched in the mall. I followed his sorry ass for 4-5 kilometres to his house because I wasn't going to let him win by stopping following him (and I told him loud and clear about that). I had blisters all over my feet thanks to his moronic attitude.

 

Then he apologized. Kinda. He bought me dinner. That was good enough to make it up.

 

Finally, we had sex.

 

The end.

[JamesSavik]

Ordinarily I'm old school in such matters but an old school woman would never think of doing some of the things that women are doing today.

 

I've seen women get aggressive and get in other peoples faces. If they are going to act that way, they should expect to be bitch-slapped.

[scotchirish87]

I remember reading a post somewhere, maybe here, regarding holding doors open for women. One gay guy responded that he's gay, not trying to get into her pants, and therefore doesn't feel any moral obligation to give women special treatment. I kinda feel similar, I understand that most women are physiologically weaker than most men, and I'll hold the door for friends or family, but I'm probably not going to hold it for some complete stranger who is perfectly capable of opening a door them self.

 

All that to say, if a woman has it coming, give her a good smack, but not abusively.

[Y_B]

I remember reading a post somewhere, maybe here, regarding holding doors open for women. One gay guy responded that he's gay, not trying to get into her pants, and therefore doesn't feel any moral obligation to give women special treatment. I kinda feel similar, I understand that most women are physiologically weaker than most men, and I'll hold the door for friends or family, but I'm probably not going to hold it for some complete stranger who is perfectly capable of opening a door them self.

 

Holding the door for someone is a common courtesy not a charity for the weak or an act of seduction. It speaks volumes about people when they can and do perform these little selfless gestures, and I can proudly say that I was raised to hold the door unconditionally. It's not shown everywhere, which is unfortunate but it's not a bad thing to emulate.

Edited June 17, 2010 by Yang Bang

[Persinette]

Ordinarily I'm old school in such matters but an old school woman would never think of doing some of the things that women are doing today.

 

I've seen women get aggressive and get in other peoples faces. If they are going to act that way, they should expect to be bitch-slapped.

 

Unless you're genuinely worried for your physical safety 'getting up in someone's face' shouldn't get anyone hit; male, female or otherwise. If you can't walk away from it or calm them down the appropriate response to verbal aggression is verbal aggression, not a black eye.

[Skyline]

Here is what I believe. I believe that under most circumstances, it is wrong to hit anyone. I honestly don't see any difference between hitting another guy and hitting a woman. It is generally wrong regardless of gender. However, I'm not just going to stand back and let someone turn me into a punching bag, nor am I going to stand back and let a person hurt someone I love. Under those circumstances, I have no qualms about hitting someone, regardless of gender. I'll kick 'em too, even in the groin in that's what it takes. However, as long as people leave me and people I love alone, I will not resort to violence.

 

I chose, "Normally yes, but a man shouldn't allow a woman to hit him or someone he loves."

 

Yup, thats generally how I feel. Just like kindergarten, keep your hands and feet to yourselves. Regardless of if you've got a bucket or a hose.

[old bob]

I voted like the majority of the voters

AFAIK, I cannt remember if I hit a girl in my first schoolyears but fortunately I never had the opportunity to do it since 75 years .

So my vote is just theoretical so DQMOT

[MikeL]

I remember reading a post somewhere, maybe here, regarding holding doors open for women. One gay guy responded that he's gay, not trying to get into her pants, and therefore doesn't feel any moral obligation to give women special treatment. I kinda feel similar, I understand that most women are physiologically weaker than most men, and I'll hold the door for friends or family, but I'm probably not going to hold it for some complete stranger who is perfectly capable of opening a door them self.

 

All that to say, if a woman has it coming, give her a good smack, but not abusively.

 

 

 

Holding the door for someone is a common courtesy not a charity for the weak or an act of seduction. It speaks volumes about people when they can and do perform these little selfless gestures, and I can proudly say that I was raised to hold the door unconditionally. It's not shown everywhere, which is unfortunate but it's not a bad thing to emulate.

I agree on holding the door for someone being a common courtesy. It's one that we should apply to men as well as women and to young and old alike. I will always hold the door for a woman and if she is miffed that I stepped in front of her to do it, that's her problem. It just makes sense to hold the door for the person behind you regardless of who they are. Nearly 100% of people respond with "thank you".

 

And guys, always open and close a car door for any woman riding with you. Then you walk around to the other side to get in the car; don't make her slide across the seat for you. My wife and I have been married 40 years and I still get the car door for her every time.

 

Now, we've gotten away from the subject of hitting a woman. If you are always courteous, you will likely never be faced with that question.

[Persinette]

I will always hold the door for a woman and if she is miffed that I stepped in front of her to do it, that's her problem.

 

1. Pushing in front of somebody is bad manners, and 2. Chivalry being forced on an unwilling recipient is not respectful; infact it's just the opposite.

[MikeL]

1. Pushing in front of somebody is bad manners, and 2. Chivalry being forced on an unwilling recipient is not respectful; infact it's just the opposite.

Well, that does present a problem. I don't think I'll worry about the very few feminists who resent good manners.

Edited June 18, 2010 by MikeL

[hh5]

Holding the door for someone is a common courtesy not a charity for the weak or an act of seduction. It speaks volumes about people when they can and do perform these little selfless gestures, and I can proudly say that I was raised to hold the door unconditionally. It's not shown everywhere, which is unfortunate but it's not a bad thing to emulate.

 

Yet there are some girls that rather be bad mouthing than to be cordial and\or courteous to keep away undesirables because they don't want to be seemingly weak or flattered or get these guys to stop messing with their life.

 

They rather chase than be chased.

 

But whom they are chasing could be unobtainable

 

Worst if they're gay (joke)

[Persinette]

Well, that does present a problem. I don't think I'll worry about very few feminists who resent good manners.

 

Have you ever had a friend almost shove you into a busy road? I have. It was because he was so determined to be 'chivalrous' and walk on the outside of the pavement that he tried to push past me. With no warning.

 

He also refused to walk through doors if I held them open for him to go through first. The man would actually stand there pouting.

 

Aren't those just marvelous displays of respect?