Timmy's Journal - 5. Haiku for Poetry Prompt 2

Damn! Outta likes :heart:
Hm... Autumn and Toronto?

I really love haikus, and yours are fantastic Tim

These are great,Tim! I got Autumn and I would guess Toronto, but I wasn't sure about the water fountains, lol

Gentle, deft, describe your perfect sense of place, time and meter. Again, I am humbled.

I am glad you are stretching your wing muscles with these, Tim. I am guessing Urban is that special place you were proposed to... but the great thing about poetry is that we all feel the place we hold somewhere in ourselves. I love haiku... and yours are great... I loved your placement of 'go' in the nature one, and is there a better word than 'slake'... I believe with poetry in whatever form you use, that intrinsic you will prevail... cheers... Gary...

I really like that you're trying different forms. You're good at it too, so I'm looking forward to more.

Just for the heck of it I'm going to guess Autumn and Toronto too..lol. Seriously though, even without the hint, you created an immediate visual in both. Leaves fluttering and bold color in the first, and then with the grass and roses in the second. Good stuff.

On 10/14/2015 12:55 PM, Drew Espinosa said:

Damn! Outta likes :heart:

Hm... Autumn and Toronto?

 

I really love haikus, and yours are fantastic Tim

HI Drew. Thanks glad they worked. Autumn yes.. was going for city park..

Appreciate you reading Drew. Thank you.

tim

On 10/14/2015 12:58 PM, LitLover said:

These are great,Tim! I got Autumn and I would guess Toronto, but I wasn't sure about the water fountains, lol

Hi LL! Thank you very much. You are right about autumn of course and I was hoping for city park. That's good though, thank you!

tim

On 10/14/2015 01:13 PM, Reader1810 said:

For once I had a like, but for the sake of continuity :heart:

Hey Tim

Both were really beautiful

the first is obvious, you wrote about Autumn.

for the second, I'm going to be very specific, but it's still a bit of a guess as I haven't been there, but plan to go soon - Edwards Gardens in Toronto.

Hi 1810, yes your spot on re Autumn.. well close with the tall buildings I was looking for city park but Edwards Gardens is a park too.

Thank so much for reading ... I appreciate it..

tim

On 10/14/2015 01:24 PM, Parker Owens said:

Gentle, deft, describe your perfect sense of place, time and meter. Again, I am humbled.

Parker, thank you for the kind words. I appreciate it.

Thanks for your support.

tim

On 10/14/2015 02:16 PM, Headstall said:

I am glad you are stretching your wing muscles with these, Tim. I am guessing Urban is that special place you were proposed to... but the great thing about poetry is that we all feel the place we hold somewhere in ourselves. I love haiku... and yours are great... I loved your placement of 'go' in the nature one, and is there a better word than 'slake'... I believe with poetry in whatever form you use, that intrinsic you will prevail... cheers... Gary...

Hi Gary thanks. It's been fun.. oh im no looking forward to lyrics though. And since i read what was (and i know its not songs) I cant get Early Morning Rain outta head for some reason. Been in there for days too. Slake is a good word.. thanks my friend for all you time and support.

tim

On 10/14/2015 02:18 PM, Defiance19 said:

I really like that you're trying different forms. You're good at it too, so I'm looking forward to more.

 

Just for the heck of it I'm going to guess Autumn and Toronto too..lol. Seriously though, even without the hint, you created an immediate visual in both. Leaves fluttering and bold color in the first, and then with the grass and roses in the second. Good stuff.

Hi Def! Yeah it's been fun learning something new and then forcing myself to do it, no matter how difficult it is. I'll always prefer free verse I think. But I'm liking it.

Thanks for your support. I am serious when I say its appreciated.

tim

I left some comments on the poetry prompt about how good these are as Haiku (conforming to the standard requirement and mood, etc.), but here I will say how nice I think they are at conjuring images.

Haiku is all about the '3D picture' and letting the reader find or fail to find an emotional connection. I think you are really good at that form of detachment in your verse. It's one of the first things I noted and admired in the early poems you have posted here.

I hope you continue to write more Haiku! You're good at it.

On 10/17/2015 09:59 AM, AC Benus said:

I left some comments on the poetry prompt about how good these are as Haiku (conforming to the standard requirement and mood, etc.), but here I will say how nice I think they are at conjuring images.

 

Haiku is all about the '3D picture' and letting the reader find or fail to find an emotional connection. I think you are really good at that form of detachment in your verse. It's one of the first things I noted and admired in the early poems you have posted here.

 

I hope you continue to write more Haiku! You're good at it.

AC, I don't know what to say except thank you. You're opinions mean a lot to me. I respect your work very much. I'm loving the poetry prompts and well they are so well written, I want what I write to be worthy. Thanks again for all of your help, and support.

tim