Bloodlines - 15. Chapter 15

September 10, 1998

I looked at my clock. 2am. I sighed and lay back in my bed, trying not to notice that it was spinning. My brain was clouded from all the booze I'd consumed, not to mention all the weed I'd smoked. It dulled me to the point that I couldn't really feel anything, which was kind of a shame. Here I was, alone in my room, with just my boxers on, trashed. The perfect time for a long, slow, jack-off session. I thought about Cody and how much I missed him, and how good it would be to have him here.

Normally I didn't pine away for him. I was so busy and involved in trying to get my game up to the level of the seniors that I was pretty distracted, and then when I wasn't doing that, I was getting to know my teammates. It was really satisfying to see the looks on the other guys' faces when they found out where my buds and I were staying. Gilchrist, the dipshit from Alabama, had just about puked he was so pissed off. I reminded him that at least he didn't have to worry about fags, and that had pissed him off even more. He was a Senior, so he thought he was king shit. He wasn't. I was better than him, no question. He'd tried to slam me into the boards a few times to get even, but I dodged him easily. I bet he kept the benches warm.

There was a knock on my door and it opened slowly. I made sure my dick was tucked into my boxers. A big hulking shape appeared, and that meant it had to be Cole. “Matt?” he whispered.

“Yeah, come on in. It's cool,” I said. I flipped on the light and blinded him. He was just wearing boxers too, and damn did he look sexy. He came over and stood next to me, waiting for me to pat the bed, telling him to sit down. “What's up?”

“Dude, I heard some weird noises coming out of Konrad's room,” he said.

“What kind of noises?” I asked, noting that a complete sentence from Cole was a rarity.

“Moans and groans, like he's getting laid,” he said, grinning.

“He's probably beating off,” I joked. “Let's go fuck with him.”

I was in a playful mood as I crept down to Konrad's room, with Cole right behind me. I could feel the heat from his body; he was radiating like a big furnace. I heard the same moans and groans, and we both started giggling. I opened the door slowly, then threw it open and flipped on the lights.

Only Konrad wasn't alone, and I'd picked the absolute worst time to walk in. It was déjà vu: He was on his knees, driving his dick into Brian in almost the exact same scene I'd encountered when I'd interrupted Cody. And not only that, he'd just started blowing, so he couldn't do anything but keep blasting his load into Brian's ass while Cole and I just stared at him.

“I'm sorry,” I said, mortified. “We're leaving, it's cool.”

“Guys, wait!” Konrad called. “Dude, I'm not queer.”

“Don't worry about it,” Brian spat. “He's just jealous it's me and not him.” I glared at Brian. The fucker had just outed me.

“Dude, chill. It's cool. It stays between us, right?” I asked Cole.

“Yep,” he said.

“I'll be in my room,” I said. Konrad pulled out of Brian's ass, cum dripping off his dick. He'd fucked Brian without a condom. That really pissed me off, not at Konrad, but at Brian. How many guys did he bareback while he told Cody he was clean? I felt my anger rise and I stormed back to my room. I went to slam the door and it smacked right into Cole, who was dutifully following me. “I'm sorry dude,” I said. The look on his face was priceless, and really cracked me up. “Come on in.” He nodded and followed me in, then sat on my bed. The poor guy looked so confused.

“What I get for not minding my own business,” he said simply.

“Yeah, well that's probably true.” I sat there next to him, my mind whirling from the pot, the booze, and the situation. “You gonna tell anyone about this?”

“Nope,” he said.

“You freaked out?” I asked.

“A little. Not really freaked out,” he said. With any other guy I'd have just waited for an answer, but not this one.

“Well tell me what you're thinking then,” I ordered.

“Don't really matter to me what people do for kicks. Still, kinda freaky to see Konrad bonin' that guy.”

There was a knock at the door and Konrad came walking in, tears pouring down his face. “Dude, I don't know what happened. I was so fucking horny, and he came into my room and asked me to fuck him. I figured what the fuck?”

I made him sit in between Cole and me. “Dude, chill. It's cool. It stays between the three of us,” I said.

“Yep,” Cole said. He seemed really nervous with Konrad in the room. “I gotta crash.”

“You sure we're cool?” Konrad asked him nervously.

“Yep,” Cole said, and wandered back out.

“Dude, this whole thing blew my buzz. Let's go smoke a J,” I said. He followed me out onto the patio where we lit up one of the Escorial Specials (as I called them) and chilled.

“So you into guys then?” he asked.

“Yeah. I like women, they're hot, but another dude really does it for me,” I said. It dawned on me that this was the first guy that I’d been this candid with that I hadn't fucked.

“That's cool. I'm just the opposite. Women, fuck, they drive me insane. But if there ain't no women, then a dude will do,” he said.

“How did Brian come on to you?” I asked.

“I went out to my car to get some shit I left there and I was walking back when he, like, just shows up, and starts walking down the hall with me. When I get to my room I figure he'll just bail, but he comes in.” Konrad swallowed hard. “So he sits on my bed and he's staring at my crotch and licking his lips and shit. I was kinda weirded out but then I thought, fuck, a hummer would be so awesome. So I started pulling my shorts down in the front, showing him my bush, and he dove in. Fuck, he was like a drowning man.”

“Wow. Pretty bold,” I said. What the fuck was with Brian, hitting on my semi-straight friends?

“Yeah, so then he gets me all hot and tells me to fuck him. I didn't want to, I mean, I've had fags, sorry, I mean guys blow me before, but I never did that. But he's all sticking his ass in my crotch and I just went for it,” he said.

“No condom,” I said.

“He said I didn't need one. Says he only fucks his boyfriend and they're safe,” Konrad said.

“He lies. You're probably OK, but don't be a dumb shit next time,” I said.

“Ain't gonna be a next time,” he said. “At least not with him.” Then he gave me his sexy look.

“You think I'm letting you fuck me with that nasty dick of yours?” I teased.

“You so want me,” he teased back. “Everyone does.”

“Dream on,” I said. We laughed, then walked back to our respective rooms and crashed.

I got back from the workout at the gym and I was shattered. We had a day off, no practice, so everyone was pretty much doing their own thing. I dragged my tired ass back to the house determined to take a killer nap. Cole must have felt the same way because he came with me. It was funny; he was almost like a puppy dog, following me around. It was like I was the only one he was comfortable around. What was even weirder was that it didn't bother me.

I hadn't seen Brian this morning, which was a good thing. I was so pissed off at that fucker I could kill him. I sat there, mulling over how good it would be to just pulverize the shit out of him. It was a good fantasy. We pulled up and I parked in the garage. As if on cue, my phone rang. I pulled it out and looked at the caller id: Cody.

“I'll catch up with you,” I said to Cole, letting him know I needed my space. He smiled and nodded, then headed into the house.

“Hey,” I said, answering the phone.

“Hey. You OK? You sounded freaked on your message,” Cody said. Just his voice was soothing.

“No, I'm pissed as hell,” I said.

“At me?” he asked, worried.

“No, not at you, dumbshit. Why? Did you do something to piss me off?” I asked. Just talking to him was making my bad mood evaporate.

“Not that I can think of,” he said.

“So you think I'm some kind of drama queen that just invents reasons to be pissed at you?” I said, teasing now.

“Funny. What pissed you off?”

“Fucking Brian,” I said. Cody said nothing but I could feel his tension on the other end.

“What did he do?”

“Oh, he went for the trifecta. First, he seduces one of my drunk teammates. I busted in on him and the dude just like I did the two of you,” I said. I could feel his cringe at that.

“Well, you fill up the house with cute hockey players and let a gay boy loose, what do you expect?” he said, trying to joke. Only I didn't laugh.

“Yeah, well he was getting boned from behind, just like with you, and I burst in on him with one of my other teammates. We figured our teammate was just jacking off and we were gonna just give him major shit. So the guy started blasting into Brian's ass just as we came in, so he had to keep going,” I said. Then I paused for emphasis. “He wasn't wearing a condom.”

“He barebacked Brian?” Cody asked.

“Yeah. So if I'm pissed at you, it's for being a big fucking dumb ass and trusting that worthless piece of shit,” I said, or more like yelled.

“Fuck,” he muttered. There was an uncomfortable silence as Cody digested this news. First of all, the betrayal of trust, one that could be life-threatening. Then the thought that Brian didn't give a shit enough about Cody to protect them both.

“Then he outed me to the two guys, my teammates,” I said. I felt the rage boiling. “If he turns up dead, I did it.”

“Don't. You're worth so much more than him,” Cody said. “I'm really sorry Matt. I really am. I was so fucking stupid to trust him. That's not happening again. Ever.” He was so sincere that I couldn't be pissed at him. “You see Brad yet?”

“Is he here?” I asked.

“Yeah, he went up to see Stef.”

“Cool,” I said. “I'll talk to you later. I'm gonna go find him.”

“Later,” Cody said morosely, and hung up the phone. I strolled into the house and into the Great Hall. There were four people standing there in front of me: JP, Stef, Brad, and Brian. I stood there, boiling, trying to control my rage, my temper, feeling that control slowly slip away.

“So'd you pick up my sloppy seconds again?” Brian asked, with that smarmy tone of his. I’d braced myself to run into him, gotten my control levels up as high as they would go, but his attitude just blew that all away. I felt the rage surge through my body with a force only matched by an orgasm. I lunged at him, my fist leading the way, slamming into his face. He fell onto the marble floor, grabbing his nose and the blood that was already spurting out of it. I heard yelling but I ignored it and jumped on him, knocking the wind out of him, and just let loose, whaling on him. I got in four, maybe five punches before two very strong arms pulled me up and off of him.

“Knock it off!” Brad's voice boomed into my ear. I glared at all of them. JP glared back at me and Stef just looked at me, disappointed. I was shredded. That kind of displeasure from them was devastating. I shook Brad off and made to storm off to my room to get my thoughts together.

“Matthew!” JP called. I turned and looked at him. “I will not tolerate violence in my house,” he said sternly.

“I'm sorry. I'll go pack up my things,” I said. He was evicting me. Fuck.

“In my office. Now!” he yelled. I saw Brad stare at him, surprised. I guess he didn't yell much. I nodded and followed him into his office, with Brad right behind me. “I don't recall asking you along Bradley,” he said.

“Yet I am here nonetheless,” Brad said firmly. Everyone was so pissed off. I felt horrible. We all just stood there, me with my sore hands and looking guilty as hell, Brad and JP glaring at each other. Stef came in like a breath of fresh air.

“Isidore has conveniently offered to patch Brian up,” he said. “That gives me the opportunity to find out what is going on first hand.” There was something about him that just lightened up the atmosphere.

“Explain yourself,” JP snapped at me.

I went through the whole thing, from the moment Cole came into my room, to the minute that Konrad left.

“I fail to see how that justifies you beating the shit out of Brian in my house, and in front of me,” JP said.

“You don't?” Brad asked. “You're serious?” JP gave him a tired look. “The fucker just outed him in front of two of his teammates. What if more people find out? Or is that alright?”

“This is different from when it happened to you Bradley,” JP said firmly.

“How, exactly, is it different?” Brad demanded. Stef's expression almost made me laugh. He wasn't upset at all. If anything, he was totally into all the drama, just observing as the two of them slugged it out verbally.

“You were in high school,” JP said feebly. “And the whole school knew about you. Here, Matt’s in college, and only two guys know. And they've agreed to keep their mouths shut.”

“So it's not murder, it's only manslaughter?” Brad chirped back. I had to agree with Stef, it was fascinating to watch them. “Maybe tonight Brian can fill in the rest of them. Weren't you planning to host the whole team on Friday? What a great opportunity for him to out Matt to the whole team. But then again, since Matt’s gay, he should probably be honest and tell them anyway, right Dad?”

“You are not being reasonable,” JP retorted, clearly on the defensive.

“No?” Brad said. He was really pissed off about this; there was fire in his eyes. It was actually getting a little scary. “So it's completely fair and reasonable for Brian to decide when Matt should come out to everyone?” Even Stef started to look a little worried.

I decided to risk their wrath. “The outing is something I'll probably have to deal with anyway. I just didn't want to do it right away. But that's not what really pissed me off.”

“Oh?” JP demanded, turning on me. “And just what did possess you to pound him into a pulp?”

“Cody fucked him without a condom, and Konrad fucked him without a condom. He told both of them it was cool because he only had unprotected sex with Justin.” They all stared at me now. I saw JP trying to work that through in his mind. It sounded so trite, but they all understood. They'd all lost friends to AIDS. They knew the drill.

“I will talk to Brian and we will see what can be done to ensure that we can all be civil in the future,” JP said. I saw Brad ready to jump all over him, but he looked at Stefan, who gave him a look and that calmed him down. The dynamics between these guys was fascinating. “In the meantime, you will keep your fists to yourself,” he said to me.

“I'm sorry JP. I really am,” I said.

“Well, you were impulsive and aggressive, and while violence never solves anything, it usually creates more problems, sometimes people can be pushed to their breaking point. You have also unwittingly re-opened some old wounds and bad memories, and we must make sure not to damn you for those past events.” I nodded, the tears already flowing down my face. Some bad-ass I am, crying like a pussy. I turned and fled back to my room, shutting the door on all of this shit, just burying my head in my pillow.

I heard a gentle knock, and then the door opened. I sat up and turned to find Stefan there, carrying a large album. “I want to show you some people,” he said simply. I nodded and he sat next to me on the bed and put the album on my legs. “This is Jeff, your cousin,” he said. He led me through the album, and by doing that, he took me on a tour of his life. He told me about Jeff and how drugs had ultimately killed him. I put my arm around him supportively as tears dribbled down his cheeks.

Then we got to their current family. Baby pictures of Brad, Ace and Claire. And of another guy, a guy who looked a little like me when I was a kid. “That is Billy. He is the reason your conflict touched a nerve. When Brad was in high school, he and Billy got into an argument and Billy outed Brad and Robbie to the whole school. Well, actually he outed Robbie in the locker room after football practice and Robbie kicked his ass. They almost moved to Malibu and stayed with me, but JP finally saw where justice was in that situation, and he allowed them to stay. But Isidore and Billy moved out.”

“Wow. That fractured the whole family,” I observed. “No wonder he was so upset by that. Where's Billy now? I haven't met him yet?”

Stephan really cried now. “He came to a party here with some thugs and Brad, Ace, and Claire would not let them in. Evidently they were drunk, and he ended up dead, killed in a drunk driving accident.”

“God, Stef, I feel so bad. I had no idea. I didn't mean to stir up all these bad memories. I need to apologize to JP. I need to make this up to him,” I said, babbling.

“Let me show you something,” he said. He led me to the deserted Great Hall and gestured to a picture. It was an abstract of a man, a man that resembled Billy. There were shards of glass and metal incorporated into it. It was really good, and the tactile feel with the shards gave it an entirely different dimension. But I sensed I wasn't there for art appreciation. “Brad painted that. The glass, that metal, he got from the crash site where Billy died.”

“It's spectacular. I didn't know Brad was that talented. That's amazing,” I said.

“I'm glad to hear you say so, but it just shows your ignorance as an art connoisseur,” I heard Brad say as he put his arm around me.

“You're right, now that you mention it. There's an arrogance to it. The guy who painted it is obviously an asshole,” I teased.

“If you will excuse me, I will return this album,” Stef said, leaving us alone.

“Let's get out of here,” Brad said. He led me out to the garage and to the Ferrari I still hadn't gotten to drive. It fired right up and he tooled on out to I-280 and just blasted north toward the City. “You walked into an old argument.”

“Yeah, I'm figuring that out,” I told him. “I don't think those guys are going to out me to the rest of the team. I mean I know I'll have to tell them eventually, but fuck, school hasn't even started.”

“That's not the point,” Brad said. “The point is that it is your decision to make, your choice on when it happens. Billy took that choice away from me. It's taken me a long time to forgive him for that. Brian knows better.”

“I wonder how many guys he's barebacked,” I said sadly.

“Did you and Cody have unprotected sex?” he asked.

“Once, only I thought I was the one he had to worry about,” I said. I saw his look. “Don't give me the lecture. I know the drill. It wasn't my fault.” I didn't want to talk about my Texas experience; I just wanted it to fade away as a bad memory.

“That's a whole different issue,” he said. “I've seen a lot of people die from that fucking disease. I don't want to lose you to it too. So that gives me the right to be a little nosy about it, OK?”

“Whatever,” I said. I didn't see how that gave him the right at all, but I didn't want another argument. “Thanks for sticking up for me.”

“You were wrong to lay Brian out like you did, but then again, I'm not one to talk. I've been in my share of fights. But I think you're right.” After that we just drove around, enjoying each other's company.

I got back and was glad to see that no one else was around, so I just headed back to my room, desperate for some peace and quiet. I crashed, letting sleep wash away this whole shitty day. I was awakened by a hand shaking me, gently yet firmly. I opened my eyes and found Cole looking down at me.

“Hey,” I said. “What time is it?”

“It’s close to 6pm. Thought you may want some time to get ready for dinner,” he said simply.

“Thanks Cole. That was awfully fucking nice of you,” I said, smiling. “Now that you know I like guys, you trying to get into my pants?” He blushed a deep red but said nothing. “I'm sorry. I was just teasing.” He nodded. Then his expression changed.

“Roommate assignments are out,” he said. The University let people form groups and then kept those groups together. Sometimes it was by major, like math majors, but in our case it was by sport, so we could all be in the same basic dorm.

“Oh yeah? Who'd you get stuck with?” I asked playfully. “I'm betting Gilchrist.”

“Guy's an asshole,” he muttered.

“Who then?” I asked.

“You. If you're OK with that,” he said nervously.

“Shit, I couldn't have picked anyone better than you,” I said sincerely. Then he smiled, a big smile, a radiant smile. This guy had picked me to be his life preserver, to help him adjust to this big city and big school. It dawned on me that if I had rejected him, it would have really hurt the poor guy. Instead, I felt honored.

“That's what I thought,” he said. I braced myself then, and lunged off the bed and onto him, tackling him, but only for a second before he flipped me onto my back and smashed on top of me. Damn he was heavy.

“You gonna let me up now?” I asked.

“Yep,” he said, and stood up, lowering his hand down for me to grab, then he pulled me up. Only there was one thing I'd noticed on the way up. His dick was hard, or if not hard, it was getting there. Too funny.

I took a shower and jacked off thinking about how awesome it would be to have Cole pin me down and fuck me senseless. Then I threw on some casual clothes and headed up to the dining room. Our normal crew was there. My teammates, Konrad, Cramer, Cole, and Danfield. JP and Stefan, along with Frank and Isidore. Brian wasn't there, but Brad was. Konrad looked at me nervously, but I shook my head slightly, telling him not to worry.

“I don't think you've met my son, Brad,” JP said, introducing him. “His partner is Frank's son, Robbie.” The guys took that in stride. “Brian had to go out of town on business, so he won't be with us tonight.”

So did they send him away until Sunday when I moved into the dorms? That actually made sense. Only where did they send him? Malibu? With Cody? I started to get paranoid, and I couldn't stand not knowing. “Where did Brian go Stef?” I asked him.

“He is in Chicago, checking up on some of my properties there and arranging a place for me to stay when I visit later on,” he said. There was a smile in his eyes, telling me that he understood why I asked.

“Are you sticking around?” I asked Brad.

“You anxious to get rid of me?” he teased.

“Well yeah. Isn't everyone?” I shot back. I winked at JP but he looked down at his plate. There was a little smile there though.

“Sucks to be you. I'm here for the weekend. Robbie's coming up tomorrow night too. He doesn't want to miss the party,” Brad said.

Then the food arrived and vanished at an amazing rate. Brad watched Cole eat and started laughing. “Stef, you want me to liquidate part of your portfolio to help pay for all this food?” he joked. The guys looked at him nervously but he laughed. “Eat. I'm kidding.” They smiled at him and then we resumed our food orgy.

“Professor Crampton, we'd like to thank you for your generosity,” Danfield said. I'd found out that he came from Virginia, from a blue blooded family, so he had all the moves down.

“You are all quite welcome,” JP said graciously.

“I have enjoyed having you boys around,” Isidore said smoothly. “I fear we will not see you after you move into the dorms.”

“You can come watch our games,” Konrad said, flirting. The guy was incorrigible.

“I may just do that,” she said. “And you must join us for dinner whenever you can.” We all stared at her. She was opening her doors and table to five hungry hockey players? They may need that money from Stef's portfolio after all.

“Are you busy tomorrow morning?” Brad asked me.

“I'm supposed to be at the gym, but I can probably put that off,” I said. “Why?”

“We're going to meet with those guys who have the new search engine. I thought you might like to tag along.”

“Awesome,” I said. “I'll make sure it's cool with the coach.” The other guys looked at me with a mixture of curiosity and jealousy.

“And tomorrow night is our big barbecue,” Stef said. “A house full of young hockey players. A gay man's dream come true.” The guys had been around Stefan long enough to be comfortable with him, so we all laughed hysterically at that. And Konrad winked at him. Of course.