Brian: Taking Courage - 27. Family time

"So, how are things with Deirdre. Toby was saying last night that he didn't see that much of her."

Brian was helping Evie prepare lunch. They'd driven over to collect Toby; Evie had insisted they stay to lunch and Toby had immediately spirited Gordon away to do something in the orchard whilst Drew was immured in his studio and may or may not join them for lunch. Gordon had explained to Brian ages ago that his Dad did disappearing acts like that, so Brian didn’t mind being co-opted by Evie.

He was somewhat surprised by the question and temporised, "Well…"

"Don't worry, I wasn't prying or anything. Toby was chatting last night about going to your Mum's and Drew simply asked whether he went to his Mum's much", Evie pulled a face, "The boy didn't seem impressed, evidently she's been rather unreliable."

Brian snorted, "I'm sorry, but that's Deirdre all over. She used to be better with Toby, she'd let me down at the drop of a hat but would be there for him. But, as he got older, she became less reliable and with me coming back…"

"With a boyfriend", Evie gave him a conspiratorial look.

"And her finding Toby's copy of Gay Times…"

"She's finding she doesn't have the son she thought, eh?"

"Something like that. We've a meeting with the solicitor this week. And they want Toby there too." Evie raised an eyebrow and cocked her head. "Yeah, I know. So we're all going, Gordon, Toby and me. See what it's about."

"Have they said?"

"Not really. They've been in discussions with Deirdre's solicitors. Oh, and I sent them my recording of my discussion with her."

Evie laughed, "Discussion, well that's a polite way of putting it."

"Yeah well. Life with Deirdre was like that. As far as I'm concerned, we need to get things sorted and fix the custody arrangements. I'm still paying maintenance."

Evie stared, "To Deirdre. But that means you're paying double."

"Yeah, I know. But you know what. I don't care because Toby's as happy as Larry. I'm hoping that with some sort of agreement, we can move on."

"You mean sharing him?"

Brian pulled a face, "I'm not keen for Toby to be staying with Deirdre when Jasper's there, but…"

"You've nothing to present to a family court?"

"Something like that. We might have to live with it and then deal with it", he pulled a face.

"See what comes out of the meeting."

"Yeah. Jasper’s evidently talking about going away, moving further South where his talents would be better appreciated".

Evie laughed, "The man does have talents, then?"

Brian shrugged, "I've never met him, and from what I've heard, he sounds a nasty piece of work. But Deirdre's happy for the moment. They’re going on an extended break, to see if moving South would work."

"Will Toby visit her?”

“No suggestion of that, thank God. He’s not keen, and a half. We’d have to go with him, which would be a pain.”

“The Jasper thing?”

“Yeah, I don’t want him having to deal with it, at his age. It’s not fair.”

“And if she did move. Permanently."

"Then we'd move heaven and earth to make sure Toby stayed. He knows that if push comes to shove, he'll have to talk about things, about Jasper and what he's like, to the authorities. Solicitors or child-protection or something."

"Is that OK?"

Brian snapped, "Of course it's not bloody OK. He's only 14. Sorry sensitive subject.”

Evie put her hand on his arm, "It's fine. I understand. But if needed, he'll do it?"

Brian nodded, "He's even been making notes, keeping a sort of diary."

Evie gave a dry laugh, "More of your lists?"

"Seems like it. Wasn't my idea, though. Something he and his mate Justin came up with. I suspect that Justin's parents might have been in on it. They're great, very supportive and encourage Toby in his interests, food miles, wholefood, the lot."

The two smiled. "I think you and Gordon should get married."

It was said almost a propos of nothing, so Brian had to look at Evie to check that she was serious. She looked up at him. "Just a quiet one, nothing fussy. But if there are problems with Toby or if, God forbid, you were ill, then what with your Mum nearby and Gordon being your husband, I reckon you'd have a good case. Drew and I weren't planning on getting married, you know 'fuck the patriarchy' and all that, but then I got pregnant, and we realised."

"Yeah, I know what you mean, when I would come back on leave from the Army there'd be times when I'd collect Toby and people would ask who the hell I was. I got used to carrying papers, and as soon as he got seriously verbal Toby'd give folk stick, telling them I was his Dad in no uncertain terms." Brian laughed. "I'd have to ask Gordon, but yeah, I think you might be on to something."

Discussion was halted by the advent of Toby and Gordon, both filthy and Toby full of excitement about what they'd been doing. Gordon simply smiled and rolled his eyes when Toby wasn't looking. Drew didn't join them for lunch, Evie sent Toby over with a sandwich and Toby came back with an awed comment about Drew painting.

Mid-meal, Gordon suddenly remembered, “Marcus’ son Edward finally came back with the pictures last night” he grinned, “they look good, and Brian says that they make me look sexy.” Evie laughed and Brian rolled his eyes.

Toby latched onto it immediately, “Can we see them, please. Do you have them on your phone?”

Brian and Gordon exchanged a look, then Gordon dug out his phone and showed the pictures to his Mother and Toby. There were two images; Brian and Gordon had looked them over and not come up with any reason why not. Both were moody, heavily black and white. In one Gordon was stood leaning against a wall and Brian was leaning against him, almost but not quite embracing. In the other, the two had collapsed on a sofa and were laughing uproariously.

Brian cocked an eye at Evie, “Believe it or not, neither was posed. Evidently the posed ones all look too stiff, but these were ones he took on the sly.”

Evie nodded and smiled, paying them great attention despite the smallness of the images, “I can see that. That one in particular”, she indicated the one where they were laughing, “looks like Gordon in a way that photos usually never do.” She nodded again. “Well done, and do please get us copies, full size.”

“Mum, will you have room?”

Evie cocked her head and looked at Gordon, “We’ll make room, sweetie.”

Toby’s response was more muted, Brian suspected that the boy was a bit too embarrassed to say anything in case he sounded stupid in front of Evie. But a great deal of attention was paid. It was only when they'd settled after lunch that they remembered to bring up the idea of the holiday, should they mention it. In their discussions the previous evening, Gordon had pointed out that it was not fair to Toby to simply ignore Russ’ offer. If they were going to insist that Russ take Toby into consideration, then perhaps they should, too.

Brian hadn’t been keen, but now? He shrugged, "Sport, we might have an offer of a place for our holidays."

Toby's face lit up, "Where? I was asking Noah, but he goes fishing in Scotland with his Dad where it’s wet and boring".

"How do wetlands in Normandy sound?"

"Normandy as in France?"

"Yeah. There's a large area of marsh, a forest and canal, plus Rouen not too far away and we might get to Paris."

"How come? Is it expensive?"

Trust Toby, he doesn't ask where it is but how come we can go there, "No, it's not expensive. It's free. It's part of one of Mr Russ' businesses and he's letting people use it for holidays rather than have it empty. It will be all right to live in, but not like a holiday cottage."

"You mean we might need to buy extra stuff?"

"Yes. And I've no idea whether we can visit the marsh, but there is a visitor centre, I think. Oh, and Russ might come visit."

Toby's eyes lit up at that, "That's great. For how long? Will he stay with you?"

"There are no plans yet, just ideas. Look, it’s not certain, so don’t get your hopes up. This is part of Russ’ business, so it might go badly."

Toby's eyes flitted from Brian to Gordon to Evie, but he kept quiet. It was Gordon that bit the bullet, "If we fancied a bit of extra fun, then it certainly wouldn't be where someone could overhear. Got it?"

Toby nodded and said mmm. He got up to go, but then turned, "It sounds great, and I'll thank Mr Russ next time I see him."

Evie had kept quiet, but they could see she was having a hard time restraining her laughter, "That boy is too sharp for his own good. He told Drew with all seriousness that he stayed with us last night so that you two could have some proper fun with Mr Russ and that it was good that you two got to have fun with people he liked too."

The two men stared, Gordon shook his head, "And we thought we were being discreet."

"Sorry love, but kids have a way of finding things out, no matter how much you try."

Brian laughed, "I gather there's a story behind that."

Evie smiled, "More than one, but Drew's better at telling them than me, but this little monkey", she ruffled Gordon's head, "had a way of finding everything out."

"Mum!"

She smiled and waggled her head from side to side, "So you two ARE having fun with Russ, I didn't misunderstand?"

"Mum. It's been twice. He was a client, and fancied a bit more", Gordon shrugged, "We decided to give him a challenge."

"The Wetlands Centre!"

"Yeah, though we didn't know it was going to be that. Just had to be something to keep Toby happy and then they came up to Russ' penthouse, Toby and his mate Noah, and Toby let rip and Russ seemed to enjoy it."

"He turned up here by accident."

"You sure?"

"Pretty sure. It seems that his PA did all the research. And he enjoyed last Saturday, so when we thought of a follow-up it was Friday. And we all had dinner together."

"My Mum commented on him not so much having friends as finding a ready-made family, we're keeping an eye on things."

"Make sure you're not taken over completely?"

"Yeah. Things have got a bit that way. Last time we met he offered us memberships at a gym that he part owns, and then promptly comes out with the holiday cottage thing as well.”

“Thing is, Toby likes him too. But we had a few words last night."

“With Russ?”

“Yeah. Told him it was all a bit fast, and he was trying to buy us?”

Evie cocked her head on one side, “And is he?”

“Not sure. “

“It might be that he simply doesn’t know the value of the gifts he offers.”

“Mum! Supporting the capitalists.”

“Being realistic, sweetie. I thought you two liked Russ. You could try putting strict limits on what you do. That sort of thing. I just don’t think you should dump him straight away. He seemed a well-balanced sort of guy, to me.”

Brian sighed, “And Toby’s keen to see him again.”

Evie smiled, "And thinks it's cool that you two do 'stuff'", she put the word in air quotes, "with him."

"Do you think he talks about it? Oh God, I hope not."

"With his mate, Noah",

Gordon frowned, "Doubt it, but who knows what those two get up to."

Evie stared, "Toby and Noah?"

"We wonder."

"I've had a few conversations with him, and I think whatever's happening, if at all, is low key."

Evie wrinkled her brows a bit, "Do you think you need to…"

Brian held up his hands, "Look, I don't want to get into nitty gritty with him at this stage, but I certainly don't want anyone taking advantage of him. So, I'm trying to balance things. I certainly wasn't sexually active at that age, but it happens."

Thankfully, Toby's return prevented further examination on that topic. In the car, the boy was full of their proposed French trip which, in his mind, had become a reality. So, Brian had to reiterate that it was only an idea.

They didn’t go straight home, they had clothes to shop for and would need to try things on. Neither man trusted buying on-line, besides their bodies were changing. Since their return from the Emirate, there was the different, somewhat improved diet (albeit counterbalanced by Toby's fondness for sweet things), a different exercise regime, and the incipient Dad bods that they fought against. Or rather, that Brian fought against, because he swore that Gordon remained trim whatever he ate. At the mention of Gordon's Dad bod, Toby had even piped up that it was really as step-Dad bod, the first time the boy had used the S word, but he seemed comfortable with the idea.

Toby had been allowed off on his own for an hour, and he'd meet them at the coffee shop, with strict instructions to keep his phone on. They had done the shopping, moderately successfully, and were now sitting outside a coffee-bar that had the advantage of looking out over the Cathedral precinct, so they had a view of the green lawn, the Cathedral's glorious West front and the old Palace, now a school, but still historic. Oh and hundreds of Saturday-afternoon shoppers.

It was pleasantly warm, they were relaxed. Brian was keeping an eye open for Toby whilst enjoying people watching, then Gordon stiffened. "That guy with the two little girls."

There was a guy with dark blond hair, slightly too long as if he was trying to cover up a bald patch, wearing a pale-blue polo shirt with a logo on it and beige chinos. He held onto the hands of two little girls, both blond, both in identical pale blue Alice in Wonderland-style dresses. "You think that might be Ralph?"

"Pretty sure. It looks enough like him, and the kids."

"Yeah. And..."

Whatever Brian was going to say was interrupted as the man turned towards them, looked at Gordon full on, went white as a sheet then turned away, hurrying the young girls, protesting, in front of him.

Gordon took a deep breath, "Shit. I've never had that effect on people before."

Brian laughed, "Well, that's probably confirmation that it was Ralph, and much as you don't want to meet him, he wants to meet you even less. I think we might need more coffee."

"You bet."

When Brian returned with their refills, he looked at Gordon and said carefully, "Ralph's reaction might tell us something else too."

"What?"

"He's still wary of you, the boy he had sex with 15 years ago?"

"You think he's still in the closet but interested."

Brian shrugged, "Conflicted? Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt."

---

Late, late afternoon, Toby was on the balcony tending his plants whilst Brian started to sort out supper, aided and abetted by Gordon. Knowing that Toby could hear them, Brian decided to bring up what Evie had mentioned.

"Your Mum reckons that we ought to get married, sooner rather than later."

Gordon snorted, "Dad keen on a party, or what?"

"No, she suggested something quick and small. With all the fuss with Deirdre about Toby, and the fact that we'll be seeing more of him, it makes sense if we're married. If I'm ever ill, then with Mum around and you as my husband, there should be no question of Toby having to live elsewhere. It makes a lot of sense. Evie was saying that she and Drew hadn't planned to get married."

"A lot of their friends didn't."

"But you coming along changed things, evidently. And remember, I had to be careful when Toby was young, people would object to this strange bloke taking a young kid." Brian frowned, "It happens."

"Something small", Gordon paused in what he was doing, "you mean just you, me, Toby, Mum and Dad, and your Mum?"

Brian shrugged, "Something like that. No big ceremony, just small and positive."

Gordon grinned, "With a slap-up meal afterwards. Sounds my kind of celebration." He stood up and put his arms round Brian and kissed him, "I'd love to marry you Mr. Wilkinson".

"Sorry, it wasn't a bit more romantic."

"Don't be daft, we've been over that."

They resumed kissing but were eventually interrupted by loud coughing from Toby who was stood on the balcony determinedly not looking into the kitchen.

"Sorry, sport. We got a bit carried away."

"Does that mean you are engaged?"

Gordon looked at Brian who shrugged, "I imagine so, though I thought you were supposed to have engagement rings for that."

Gordon grinned, "Hardly worth investing in engagement rings if we're getting married soon."

"Depends on the register office."

"Bugger. Suppose it does."

"But Dad! Does that mean I can tell people you are engaged, or that you are getting married?"

"You OK with that sport?"

"I think it's an ace idea. After all we all live here in Gordon's flat." He stared at his Father, "You think that Mum'll cause problems on Wednesday?"

"Well, for a start, sport. She's not going to be there. It's just us and my solicitor, reporting back, then we decide what's next. But she, the solicitor, wanted you there because it concerns you and you are old enough to at least have an opinion. Right."

"But it's the court that decides."

"Something like that. If your Mum and I can reach a polite agreement, then the most the court does is rubber stamp." Toby rolled his eyes at the idea of a polite agreement, but grinned and said that the idea of them getting married was ace.

After dinner, they'd expected Toby to disappear. He went to his bedroom and minutes later they heard the printer going in the box room that doubled as an office. It wasn't school-work he was printing however, as he reappeared and handed his Father a couple of sheets. They were titled, Living with Jasper along with dates. It was the boy’s write up of the things Jasper had said and done.

Brian handed it to Gordon, "I think Gordon had better read this, sport, rather than me, so folk can't say I influenced you. OK". Toby nodded and Brian gave him a hug. Gordon took his time reading it and Brian kept a hand on Toby, aware the boy was a bit tense.

Finally Gordon nodded, "Reads well, no problem there. Makes me want to strangle the bastard, but then we knew that."

Brian nodded, "Good. You bring that along on Wednesday and we can give it to the solicitor. That and the recording should at least make a judge think. Look, sport, if push comes to shove, folk'll want to ask you to about this, make sure it's real and not invented. I'll be there, but it might not be nice."

Toby looked anxious but fierce, "That's fine Dad. I'd rather do it and make sure I don't see Jasper."

They settled down to a treat, a new film Toby wanted to watch on Netflix and some ice cream.