The Last Coming Out Story

[David McLeod]

JasonDiggy has created an amazing world inThe Last Coming Out Story. His characters are compelling and comprehensive. His language is lyric. His story is filled with both pathos and humor. If you're not reading it, you should be! Please join the discussion, here.

Edited January 13, 2009 by David McLeod

[sat8997]

What David said.

 

I'm waiting for the next chapter...I want to know what J.F. is wearing.

[David McLeod]

Sat8997: Thanks for posting and keeping the forum alive. I think Jason's writing is something special.

[Benji]

JasonDiggy has created an amazing world in The Last Coming Out Story. His characters are compelling and comprehensive. His language is lyric. His story is filled with both pathos and humor. If you're not reading it, you should be! Please join the discussion, here.

 

...........The link doesn't work for me, where is his site?

[Cynical Romantic]

Must've completely missed this one when it first went up. And another locally-set tale, too! I get the feeling that everyone on GA will feel like they know Montreal intimately soon, whether they've been here or not.

 

*Scampers off to read*.

 

Update: Absolutely loving this so far. It had me laughing so hard I nearly lost my hot chocolate. My favourite character, hands-down, is the father. He's a real riot, and reminds me strongly of many, many people I know, right down to the same expressions, sayings and political opinions.

Edited January 13, 2009 by Cynical Romantic

[David McLeod]

...........The link doesn't work for me, where is his site?

 

Once again, David the Luddite strikes. Somehow I put in a link to nowhere. It's been corrected in the first post, and is here as well. Sorry .

[canundra]

I wonder...does he speak English with an English accent or with a French one?

[Cynical Romantic]

Good question.

 

Speculating here... The story says he lives in the 'burbs, which begs the question, which suburb? If he's a west islander, even having British parents and going to French school, he probably has something of a west island Montreal anglo accent. If he lives in a more francophone neighbourhood in, say, the east end or the south shore or Laval, and he's got British parents and most of his friends and other associations are French, he probably has retained a thicker British accent because his English would be used more rarely and mostly with his parents. Of course, that presumes that his parents have kept their accents.

 

There are lots of different English accents among Montreal anglophones, and it's usually pretty easy for a local to tell what part of Montreal someone grew up in by how they speak. For non-locals, though, and especially for non-North Americans, the English spoken in Montreal is very similar to the English spoken in the RoC or in certain parts of the US, like the Northeast or the Midwest. I can hear the difference, but outsiders usually can't.

 

And even the most anglo Montrealers pepper their speech with "montrealismes". We buy wine and beer from the "dep"; we "open the light"; we take the "metro", we eat outside on the "terrace", we drive on the "autoroute", and a good many of us swear in French regularly while we're at it. Most of us are very fluent in franglais and we don't give it much thought in everyday speech.

 

And while my parents will probably always say "Saint Lawrence" instead of "Saint-Laurent" and "Dorchester" instead of "Rene-Levesque", and my mother insists that the street she lived on as a child is pronounced "Gene-Mance" (Jeanne-Mance), it's unlikely that Spencer's parents would, since that's something you find mostly among people who've been here for a few generations, not among new immigrants, as English-speaking as they might be.

Edited January 13, 2009 by Cynical Romantic

[David McLeod]

Chapter 4 is up, and continues the tradition of excellence. Ever read a book you hoped would never end? If not, you'll find one, here.

[JasonDiggy]

The school I'm writing about is on the South Shore, but combined with part of a school in Vaudreuil-Dorion. Well observed though. And you totally reminded me of "franglais," which is now stolen property. Thanks for that.

 

 

Good question.

 

Speculating here... The story says he lives in the 'burbs, which begs the question, which suburb? If he's a west islander, even having British parents and going to French school, he probably has something of a west island Montreal anglo accent. If he lives in a more francophone neighbourhood in, say, the east end or the south shore or Laval, and he's got British parents and most of his friends and other associations are French, he probably has retained a thicker British accent because his English would be used more rarely and mostly with his parents. Of course, that presumes that his parents have kept their accents.

 

There are lots of different English accents among Montreal anglophones, and it's usually pretty easy for a local to tell what part of Montreal someone grew up in by how they speak. For non-locals, though, and especially for non-North Americans, the English spoken in Montreal is very similar to the English spoken in the RoC or in certain parts of the US, like the Northeast or the Midwest. I can hear the difference, but outsiders usually can't.

 

And even the most anglo Montrealers pepper their speech with "montrealismes". We buy wine and beer from the "dep"; we "open the light"; we take the "metro", we eat outside on the "terrace", we drive on the "autoroute", and a good many of us swear in French regularly while we're at it. Most of us are very fluent in franglais and we don't give it much thought in everyday speech.

 

And while my parents will probably always say "Saint Lawrence" instead of "Saint-Laurent" and "Dorchester" instead of "Rene-Levesque", and my mother insists that the street she lived on as a child is pronounced "Gene-Mance" (Jeanne-Mance), it's unlikely that Spencer's parents would, since that's something you find mostly among people who've been here for a few generations, not among new immigrants, as English-speaking as they might be.

[Cynical Romantic]

I just noticed there were new chapters posted. I'd missed them because no announcements in the threads. But I'm all caught up now.

 

Still enjoying this a lot, and not only because you keep mentioning places I know. I find it refreshing, actually. It proves that it's not necessary to write about melodrama to have an interesting story. JF is a really fascinating character, and with that last line, he's just become even more intriguing. (Incidentally, nice cliffhanger...)

 

If you don't mind a bit of constructive criticism, though, I'm wondering a little at the timeline for this story. With the references to MSN and the internet and cell phones and N'sync and Harry Potter, it seems to be set in more recent times. But then you have them going to a memorial for Joe Rose, who was killed in the late 80s wasn't he? These little anachronisms make it a bit confusing to situate the characters in a time and place, especially in this story where political activism is so important and the context matters.

 

This sort of thing is very common in writing that's loosely based on autobiography, and I don't want to surmise too much but I suspect that's what might be happening here. The story has that kind of tone to it, so it would make sense.

 

Hope it's not too long before the next installment is posted. I'm curious about JF's motivations, though I have my suspicions as to what they were.

[JasonDiggy]

Hi Cynical.

 

I guess I couldn't fool all the people all the time. The story does take place now. This novella is part of a collection of 9 stories I've written about being out in high school, called, A Vigil for Joe Rose. All the stories are linked by that event in one way or another, and I took creative license to re-imagine it as if it happened today. The prologue to the stories is a flyer announcing the vigil. The epilogue is a newspaper clipping about the murder.

 

J

 

I just noticed there were new chapters posted. I'd missed them because no announcements in the threads. But I'm all caught up now.

 

Still enjoying this a lot, and not only because you keep mentioning places I know. I find it refreshing, actually. It proves that it's not necessary to write about melodrama to have an interesting story. JF is a really fascinating character, and with that last line, he's just become even more intriguing. (Incidentally, nice cliffhanger...)

 

If you don't mind a bit of constructive criticism, though, I'm wondering a little at the timeline for this story. With the references to MSN and the internet and cell phones and N'sync and Harry Potter, it seems to be set in more recent times. But then you have them going to a memorial for Joe Rose, who was killed in the late 80s wasn't he? These little anachronisms make it a bit confusing to situate the characters in a time and place, especially in this story where political activism is so important and the context matters.

 

This sort of thing is very common in writing that's loosely based on autobiography, and I don't want to surmise too much but I suspect that's what might be happening here. The story has that kind of tone to it, so it would make sense.

 

Hope it's not too long before the next installment is posted. I'm curious about JF's motivations, though I have my suspicions as to what they were.

[JasonDiggy]

Oh, I'd love to know what your suspicions are as to JF's motives.

 

 

 

I just noticed there were new chapters posted. I'd missed them because no announcements in the threads. But I'm all caught up now.

 

Still enjoying this a lot, and not only because you keep mentioning places I know. I find it refreshing, actually. It proves that it's not necessary to write about melodrama to have an interesting story. JF is a really fascinating character, and with that last line, he's just become even more intriguing. (Incidentally, nice cliffhanger...)

 

If you don't mind a bit of constructive criticism, though, I'm wondering a little at the timeline for this story. With the references to MSN and the internet and cell phones and N'sync and Harry Potter, it seems to be set in more recent times. But then you have them going to a memorial for Joe Rose, who was killed in the late 80s wasn't he? These little anachronisms make it a bit confusing to situate the characters in a time and place, especially in this story where political activism is so important and the context matters.

 

This sort of thing is very common in writing that's loosely based on autobiography, and I don't want to surmise too much but I suspect that's what might be happening here. The story has that kind of tone to it, so it would make sense.

 

Hope it's not too long before the next installment is posted. I'm curious about JF's motivations, though I have my suspicions as to what they were.

[Cynical Romantic]

Hi Cynical.

 

I guess I couldn't fool all the people all the time. The story does take place now. This novella is part of a collection of 9 stories I've written about being out in high school, called, A Vigil for Joe Rose. All the stories are linked by that event in one way or another, and I took creative license to re-imagine it as if it happened today. The prologue to the stories is a flyer announcing the vigil. The epilogue is a newspaper clipping about the murder.

 

J

 

Thanks for the reply.

 

Even though it was done deliberately, I still am not sure how well it works in the context of the story. The thing is, you're telling a very realistic story against a very realistic backdrop, and let's face it, the political landscape looks very different now than it did 20 years ago, even in Montreal. I think so much of the story relies on its setting (time and place) and I find it hard to reconcile the two very different time periods that the story seems to jump back and forth between. Almost as though I was reading a story set in Elizabethan times that referred to the Neil Armstrong moon landing. Okay, that's an extreme example, but you know what I mean. And there, it could actually work better, because it's just so absurd and a whole story could be written about how people in those times would react to space travel. But here, the memorial is kind of a side note, just one in a list of activist things that Spencer and JF do, and it's kinda random in a story that otherwise takes pains to be factually accurate. Just saying it felt kind of weird, that's all.

 

Are there more chapters? Feels like there ought to be at least one more, right?

[JasonDiggy]

Yup, there's one more.

 

 

Thanks for the reply.

 

Even though it was done deliberately, I still am not sure how well it works in the context of the story. The thing is, you're telling a very realistic story against a very realistic backdrop, and let's face it, the political landscape looks very different now than it did 20 years ago, even in Montreal. I think so much of the story relies on its setting (time and place) and I find it hard to reconcile the two very different time periods that the story seems to jump back and forth between. Almost as though I was reading a story set in Elizabethan times that referred to the Neil Armstrong moon landing. Okay, that's an extreme example, but you know what I mean. And there, it could actually work better, because it's just so absurd and a whole story could be written about how people in those times would react to space travel. But here, the memorial is kind of a side note, just one in a list of activist things that Spencer and JF do, and it's kinda random in a story that otherwise takes pains to be factually accurate. Just saying it felt kind of weird, that's all.

 

Are there more chapters? Feels like there ought to be at least one more, right?

[Cynical Romantic]

And a series of 9 stories, eh? Does that mean we can look forward to the other 8 being posted too?

[JasonDiggy]

I did post one already, "The Holy Ghost," but I can't say people were too thrilled.

 

And a series of 9 stories, eh? Does that mean we can look forward to the other 8 being posted too?

[David McLeod]

...With the references to MSN and the internet and cell phones and N'sync and Harry Potter, it seems to be set in more recent times. But then you have them going to a memorial for Joe Rose, who was killed in the late 80s wasn't he? These little anachronisms...

 

I understand what you're saying, but I didn't have a problem with a memorial service for someone killed 25 or so years ago, especially if it were on the anniversary of his death. I mean, there are still memorial gatherings at the Stonewall Inn to commemorate what happened in 1969.

[JasonDiggy]

The last chapter has been posted today. All comments welcome. Was it a story worth reading? Was it unique enough? Were you satisfied the story had a conclusion by the end?

[sat8997]

Yes, yes, and yes.

 

Thank you for an excellent read. I'm looking forward to what you do next.

[Benji]

Ummmmmm!! That was the last chapter?

 

I'm not that disappointed, but it leads too many questions unanswered here. Here you have given us a great synopsis for a story, and give Jean an award that was probably based on a falsehood. Leaving 'the' person in a mixed reaction to the announcement. And of course leaving many in the school and community to react with disgust. How symbolic of a move is that, to make ones self a forerunner of a cause, then announce he is only a player in the movement. Not an actual participant, one that played along with the perception of himself that he portrayed. I find an amusement in the 'twist' of the matter of 'the shoe is reversed' the role that he has taken, taking himself as the role of despised one in society and elevating himself in status, only to drop the shoe at graduation. Question is why he did do this? It would stand to reason that he did so to promote the cause even though he was not gay himself! Applauds here! for his promotion on the issue!, a bit thumbs down on his deception, however I would rule his 'deception' was intended all along to push the issue as the primary force in which he believed in. His stance cost him!

[Cynical Romantic]

I hate to say it, but I agree with Benji.

 

J-F had to have had his reasons for doing what he did. It wasn't something he did on a whim. He became a whole other person, for his entire time at high school, taking on and fighting for a cause that was obviously close to his heart. It wasn't just one facet of him, he lived a lie every single day.

 

And yet... You never give us a reason why. It's just not realistic that he would do that for no reason.

 

The only other story I can think of offhand where a straight character goes to such lengths to pretend to be gay is Graeme's "The Price of Friendship", and there, Graeme goes to elaborate lengths to set up the plot in such a way to make this believable and even there - sorry Graeme - it's a bit of a stretch. Not to mention, it's probably about to unravel. And it's only a few weeks of story-time.

 

Here, J-F spends his entire high school career not only pretending to be gay, but making gay activism his life's work. He is lying to his parents, his friends, his teachers and everyone. And he goes out of his way to do so.

 

I can think of reasons why he might have done it, hypothetically. But to make this story believable, you need to give us those reasons. You need to give us enough insight into J-F's personality and life and history to make us understand why he would make the choices he makes.

 

Otherwise, J-F isn't a person; he's just a plot device.

 

Anyway, those are my $0.02. I hope you don't mind the feedback. I wouldn't bother if I didn't think it was worth it. I think this has the potential to be a great story; you just need to give a bit more thought to what is driving these characters and flesh them out a bit, give them room to breath.

[JasonDiggy]

Well, I know the reasons aren't spelled out in so many words, but I was hoping if readers look carefully, all the pieces are there. In chapter 4, JF explains why he came out (as gay) and the benefits he had by doing that. In the last chapter, Madame Maria proves herself to be a lot more with it than Spencer knew, and she provides the other piece with one simple word. I guess it isn't clear enough, but hopefully others will wade in on this. Of course, the last piece is that JF is a bleeding heart and feels the need to "rescue" people, even if sometimes he realizes he isn't a superhero, but he "doth protest too much" about it.

 

Interesting.

Edited February 15, 2009 by JasonDiggy

[Benji]

You hate to say you agree with me!! Hahaha! It is funny I see it the way it was presented is all.

[sat8997]

I hate to say it, but I agree with Benji.

 

J-F had to have had his reasons for doing what he did. It wasn't something he did on a whim. He became a whole other person, for his entire time at high school, taking on and fighting for a cause that was obviously close to his heart. It wasn't just one facet of him, he lived a lie every single day.

 

And yet... You never give us a reason why. It's just not realistic that he would do that for no reason.

 

The only other story I can think of offhand where a straight character goes to such lengths to pretend to be gay is Graeme's "The Price of Friendship", and there, Graeme goes to elaborate lengths to set up the plot in such a way to make this believable and even there - sorry Graeme - it's a bit of a stretch. Not to mention, it's probably about to unravel. And it's only a few weeks of story-time.

 

Here, J-F spends his entire high school career not only pretending to be gay, but making gay activism his life's work. He is lying to his parents, his friends, his teachers and everyone. And he goes out of his way to do so.

 

I can think of reasons why he might have done it, hypothetically. But to make this story believable, you need to give us those reasons. You need to give us enough insight into J-F's personality and life and history to make us understand why he would make the choices he makes.

 

Otherwise, J-F isn't a person; he's just a plot device.

 

Anyway, those are my $0.02. I hope you don't mind the feedback. I wouldn't bother if I didn't think it was worth it. I think this has the potential to be a great story; you just need to give a bit more thought to what is driving these characters and flesh them out a bit, give them room to breath.

 

Did he become a whole other person? Or was he always just himself? Cyn, I'm surprised you missed the point.