gay PDA

[corvus]

There's probably a thread like this somewhere in this forum, but I'm too lazy to look for it... Anyway, one thing I'd noticed in the last few years in my environment (an upper tier liberal university) is that there are a lot more lesbian couples in public than gay couples -- meaning, I see more lesbian couples demonstrating their couple-ness than gays with acts like hand-holding and... well, mainly hand-holding. I can sometimes tell when two men are a couple, but it's rarely declared with something so obvious. Maybe it's just a perk of my university, but it might not be. So yeah. That is the motivation for this thread, which hopefully will generate some interesting dialogue, haha.

Edited September 9, 2009 by corvus

[R-Jayy]

I'm not ashamed of my sexuality or my boyfriend. So when I'm out in public with my man, I don't hide my affection.

I'll hold hands with him, hug, kiss, stand with his arms wrapped around me.

[Nephylim]

Let me be highly controvertial and suggest that perhaps it is because women are naturally more demostrative in public than men... whether gay or straight. It has been my personal experience in all my relationships that if I want affection in public I have to initiate it. Of course there are exceptions but....

[thatboyChase]

Cause girls are hot. Duh.

[Arpeggio]

Me and my boyfriend aren't much for holding hands and making out to begin with, so we don't really do it. There are rare times when we do, but raaaarrrreee. The last time we showed any PDA was coming out of the exit of a movie theater and he reached over and kissed me. About that time, some woman walked by and simply muttered under her breath and looked disgusted.

[NightOwl88]

I guess my answer to this would be pretty subjective, there are a lot of variables. Safety of the location, mindset of the people around us, atmosphere, and of course what my partner thought.

But in the ideal situation I don't see hand holding or a kiss as inappropriate, Those couples who walk around practically humping eachother on the street I think could tone it down a bit, I mean there could be children around lol.

 

Best Wishes.

NightOwl88.

[JamesSavik]

In my part of the South you had better be careful about gay PDAs on account of you could get killed if the wrong people see you.

 

In the gay areas of towns like New Orleans and the communities on the coast, no problem.

 

In small Mississippi towns you may run into some of the shit of your worst nightmares. Cops that want to keep that shit out of my town are probably the worst. They won't kill you. They'll just plant a felony amount of drugs on you and ruin your life.

[Jack Frost]

Meh, I'm starting to hate it a lot when straight people do it. *ew*

 

I do it sometimes. At least the kissing part.

[Nephylim]

I have to agree Jack. I have no problem at all with hand holding and chaste kissing by anyone or any combination of hand holders/kissers. However, when we are talking about major petting or... as Nicgh Owl so succinctly puts it 'practically humping each other in the street' then it's too much and I do feel slightly offended whether it is straight or gay.

[Zeoanne]

Sadly enough, living in a very small town, I've never seen couples of any gender (same sex) doing any kind of PDA. As a matter of fact, I only know of a female couple: One, they are very obvious insisting on looking like men. Two, not that I've ever seeing them holding hands or anything but because someone told me they are a couple. And now, my own daughter and her partner which always walk around holding hands.

I also agree that I wouldn't want to see a couple, any couple, grouping/humping each other in public. "To Everything There Is A Place."

[Bondwriter]

Doing a PDA? Like people having intimate relationships with a Personal Digital Assistant? I can understand kinky, but only up to a point.

[Rilbur]

Ammusingly, that was my own response. Then I realized they meant Public Displays of Affection.

[rknapp]

x2 on the computer bit LOL

 

He and I have kissed and held hands in public. We kissed once or twice in a small park in the known gay-friendly area of DC (yes, with plenty of people and tons of traffic around). We later made out in a small ice cream parlor, though we were the only customers and the one worker had her back turned. More recently, we went to Six Flags in MD and held hands after riding the bumper cars and were walking towards the exit.

 

No, I won't hump him in public, because I think PDA beyond hand holding the occasional "peck kiss" is uncalled for. Nobody wants to see it, straight or gay or love-triangle or inter-racial or *rambles on*.

[Mark Arbour]

 

No, I won't hump him in public, because I think PDA beyond hand holding the occasional "peck kiss" is uncalled for. Nobody wants to see it, straight or gay or love-triangle or inter-racial or *rambles on*.

 

Yep.

[David McLeod]

Back to the original question. With very limited data (reared in a small, southern Bible-belt town; two Lesbian couples in my family and two others, all attending the same Presbyterian church without any reaction other than an occasional whisper; no gay couples) I suggest, first, that "special friendships" between girls (i.e., pre-teen and teen) and women are more accepted and less threatening than similar relationship between boys (pre-teen, teen) and men. Why they are less threatening, I don't know, but (continuing to speculate) men are more dangerous, physically, than women. Perhaps it's the testosterone. I'm offering my understanding of long-standing stereotypes, here, and offer these thoughts only to stimulate discussion. Now, none of the women engaged in any PDA, and I don't know if the tolerance/acceptance would have continued if they had.

[Rilbur]

I suspect it leads back to the fact that guys find two girls making out 'hot', and two guys making out 'not'.

[Nephylim]

I suspect it leads back to the fact that guys find two girls making out 'hot', and two guys making out 'not'.

 

 

I think both are hot... all together ever hotter.

[David McLeod]

I suspect it leads back to the fact that guys find two girls making out 'hot', and two guys making out 'not'.

 

I had overlooked that. Thanks.

[Dolores Esteban]

It's nothing uncommon to see two girls - regardless of sexual orientation - hugging, embracing and kissing on the cheeks (at least in Europe). People are used to it and don't feel uncomfortable. They are less used to see hugging and kissing boys.

 

 

[Ashi]

I don't go to gay clubs or bars, so maybe I'm just weird. I live in the SF Bay Area, and I've never seen two guys kissing each other in public. Okay, the part of the Bay Area I live in is less tolerant on gay people (many of my ex-coworkers were fired, and I suspect it's because they claimed to be GLBT on their Facebook), but still... even when I go to Castro District in SF, the closest I've got is someone checking me out. That's it.... I don't get to see gay men kissing in public. How disappointing.

[Krista]

Holding hands, hugging, pecks on the cheeks, arms entwined... etc are great... forms of PDA.. but I absolutely hate people who suck face in public.. lol... maybe its a southern thing?

[Nephylim]

Holding hands, hugging, pecks on the cheeks, arms entwined... etc are great... forms of PDA.. but I absolutely hate people who suck face in public.. lol... maybe its a southern thing?

 

 

Nope. I hate it too.... ugh.