KevinD Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 Just wanted to let you know that my head was spinning with emotions as Peter & Joson had their fight. I went back & forth taking each guy's side - talk about a flip flop! :-) At the end as Jason got his feet under him and decided he jad to stand up against his mom, I found myself cheering him on. Clearly your twist at the end with Peter having an apparent accident tells us that Peter had to have been as torn up as Jason. What an evil cliffhanger! Can't wait for the next chapters... ;-) Keep up the great work! 1
AnytaSunday Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 Regarding this: I always try to give credit where it is due - Anyta has pushed me to be better at giving every more emotion, more feeling from the characters. If you feel like you know the characters, that is in no small part thanks to her. You are way too generous and entirely too modest. This is all you. Really, truly. You've just created such a wealth of emotions and the characters are real, because you believe in them and have crafted their story. I'm just the lucky one who gets to see it first (and I'm so glad of that, haha--I don't have to have such evil cliffhangers like you've left up at the moment, lol) Also, I look up to you as a writer and am always learning from you too!!! Thanks for that. 1
Andrew Q Gordon Posted December 27, 2010 Author Posted December 27, 2010 Just wanted to let you know that my head was spinning with emotions as Peter & Joson had their fight. I went back & forth taking each guy's side - talk about a flip flop! :-) At the end as Jason got his feet under him and decided he jad to stand up against his mom, I found myself cheering him on. Clearly your twist at the end with Peter having an apparent accident tells us that Peter had to have been as torn up as Jason. What an evil cliffhanger! Can't wait for the next chapters... ;-) Keep up the great work! If you were flip flopping back and forth, then I am glad - they were both wrong, but isn't that so often the case when people argue? Peter did go looking for Jason - but what happened to him that put him the hospital is for chapter 25 to reveal. Thanks for posting and for the encouragement along the way - I do appreciate it. Andy 1
Andrew Q Gordon Posted December 30, 2010 Author Posted December 30, 2010 Chapter 25 is posted - sorry folks but I think a few of you are going to be disappointed when you find out what happened to Peter and what the status of their relationship is. I would also suggest a bit of listen music - Unforgiven Here's a link: Chapter 25: Cause and Affect 2
Sara Alva Posted January 2, 2011 Posted January 2, 2011 (edited) My sense is that Peter is willing to go along with the secrecy mostly because he doesn't hang out with a lot of kids at school. His financial situation requires he work and he feel uncomfortable around those who have money. Perhaps he thought Jason was there on scholarship as well? As an aside, don't you love how authors speak as if they are observing things from the outside instead of saying 'well I wrote it like this because . . .' Is that literary license or a repressed God complex? Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment.] I think we spend so much time with our characters we start to think they're real . . . we're not creating them so much as writing their story . . . so maybe writers are all just a little nuts Edited January 2, 2011 by KingdombytheSea 1
Frostina Posted January 2, 2011 Posted January 2, 2011 I think we spend so much time with our characters we start to think they're real . I have that problem too and for me its a Huge problem, i read so much, i am ALWAYS thinking abt the people( they're people to me.. NOT characters anymore) I've come to know .. or the people i care abt and these people fall under that category!.. I cant help it.. happens EVERY TIME i read a good story!! Jason and Peter are as real to me now as my sister or my Hubby or even my parents! and i care.. and i suffer when they suffer, celebrate when they do, clap when they achieve something and Cry with /for them too! 2
Andrew Q Gordon Posted January 2, 2011 Author Posted January 2, 2011 I think we spend so much time with our characters we start to think they're real . . . we're not creating them so much as writing their story . . . so maybe writers are all just a little nuts I prefer God complex to nuts, but they might just be the same. I hesitate to say the story writes itself because there are times I start taking it one way then delete a thousand words as stupid, but when I am forced to write things - i.e. to bridge a gap to where I need to go, that is when I get bogged down, so I suppose it is true that the story does write itself because if it doesn't, well then I can't seem to make it up on demand. And you are right, sometimes they do feel real - too real maybe Nice to hear from you. Andy I have that problem too and for me its a Huge problem, i read so much, i am ALWAYS thinking abt the people( they're people to me.. NOT characters anymore) I've come to know .. or the people i care abt and these people fall under that category!.. I cant help it.. happens EVERY TIME i read a good story!! Jason and Peter are as real to me now as my sister or my Hubby or even my parents! and i care.. and i suffer when they suffer, celebrate when they do, clap when they achieve something and Cry with /for them too! Frosty, Not sure I think of my characters as being as real as my family but I can say that there are some stories I read where when it ends, I feel like a friend has left my life - sort of like I worry about them, care about what happens, see them while I am reading, almost feel myself in their world, then when it is over, I feel a lost. I guess the authors talented enough to do that, deserve the following they get - hopefully I can get there someday - wishful thinking perhaps but one must have worthy goals, right? Thanks for all your help and comments. You are a jewel. Andy 1
Sara Alva Posted January 2, 2011 Posted January 2, 2011 I have that problem too and for me its a Huge problem, i read so much, i am ALWAYS thinking abt the people( they're people to me.. NOT characters anymore) I've come to know .. or the people i care abt and these people fall under that category!.. I cant help it.. happens EVERY TIME i read a good story!! Jason and Peter are as real to me now as my sister or my Hubby or even my parents! and i care.. and i suffer when they suffer, celebrate when they do, clap when they achieve something and Cry with /for them too! Oof, yeah, I know . . . I get totally depressed when the stories I'm reading take a turn for unhappiness . . . I'm behind on this one (only on Chapter 5) since I joined pretty recently but I've read enough comments to know trouble is on the horizon . . . 1
Sara Alva Posted January 2, 2011 Posted January 2, 2011 I hesitate to say the story writes itself because there are times I start taking it one way then delete a thousand words as stupid, but when I am forced to write things - i.e. to bridge a gap to where I need to go, that is when I get bogged down, so I suppose it is true that the story does write itself because if it doesn't, well then I can't seem to make it up on demand. Yes, of course you change things as you're writing, but when you get to the final draft that's the real story. That other stuff was just you digging around to get to the truth As for getting bogged down, pretty sure that happens to most people. Some scenes are just not as vivid/exciting in our minds and thus don't flow as naturally . . . but I haven't seen any bog in your story yet 1
Frostina Posted January 2, 2011 Posted January 2, 2011 I'm behind on this one (only on Chapter 5) since I joined pretty recently but I've read enough comments to know trouble is on the horizon . . . My heartfelt wishes... best of luck!!! Trouble... pain.. and angst!!! be prepared! Andy's gonna KILL me! 1
Benji Posted January 3, 2011 Posted January 3, 2011 My heartfelt wishes... best of luck!!! Trouble... pain.. and angst!!! be prepared! Andy's gonna KILL me! ..................Better you then me!! I can't believe Andy posted 2 chapters and I had not caught up with them, blame the holidays! Anyhow the argument between Jason and Peter was predictable given the situation of Peter's attitude on Jason's wealth. But Jason thought it through, and admirably decided to go against his parents wishes. About time Jason grew a pair!! Darrell so far does not know about the blackmail attempt, but I'm sure Jason's brother does, so what is he going to do here? My guess is that he will disown his parents or contact the grandparents (I know I know, I keep going back to the guys with the white hats here ) The beating of Peter took me by surprise to me, I had thought that Peter just had an accident on his motorcycle after the argument. I was also taken aback by Peter's sister, in wanting to shove Jason away, after all just because of a lovers quarrel? She had no business there, but I think this will fuel Jason's resolve to write his parents out of his life, if you cannot accept who I am then 'f**k you' attitude will shock them back into reality. Royce especially will see that he will lose not one, but two sons over this! Great 2 chapters! Forgive me for not chiming in earlier, like I said it must be the holidays, BTW, HAPPY NEW YEAR ANDY!!! 1
Andrew Q Gordon Posted January 3, 2011 Author Posted January 3, 2011 Chapter 26 is up. As promised, I will be posting twice a week. For those of you anxious, this chapter does not resolve a lot of questions about Peter's condition - sorry. But it does flesh give some answers to a question or two. Here is a link for the current chapter. Chapter 26
Andrew Q Gordon Posted January 5, 2011 Author Posted January 5, 2011 Chapter 27 is up a day early - gonna be busy tomorrow so might not get to it. To those who hate cliffhangers, I'm sorry in advance. I promise not to have too many more in the story, maybe. Here's a link: Chapter 27: Vigil
KevinD Posted January 6, 2011 Posted January 6, 2011 Another great chapter Andy. I guess Jason won't be agonizing over telling mom "no" anymore. I think Jason will soon be hearing from his grandfather, who I sensed may already have had a clue about Jason when he seemed to go out of his was to throw the two sets of brothers together over the summer...now I'm ready for the next chapter! Thanks again for sharing the story with us! 1
Andrew Q Gordon Posted January 6, 2011 Author Posted January 6, 2011 Another great chapter Andy. I guess Jason won't be agonizing over telling mom "no" anymore. I think Jason will soon be hearing from his grandfather, who I sensed may already have had a clue about Jason when he seemed to go out of his was to throw the two sets of brothers together over the summer...now I'm ready for the next chapter! Thanks again for sharing the story with us! Kevin, Thanks for the comments. Clearly this was NOT how he envisioned telling his mom 'no' but whatever way he did it, it wasn't going to be easy. I see you are drinking from Benji's Kool-Aid - he is convinced the grandparents are the saviors. Maybe, we have heard the last from them. But no, he did not suspect either Ethan or Jason were gay, he just had a soft spot in his heart for the Miller brothers in general, having known their father and all. Seeing his grandsons and Aaron and Ethan hit it off just confirmed his impression of them. Next chapter I promise to reveal what happens in response to Jason telling his mom off - and who - if anyone is willing to help him. Promise. 1
Benji Posted January 6, 2011 Posted January 6, 2011 ................Benji's koolaid?? Jason was too kind in speaking to mommy dearest, I doubt I could have hold back my tongue on her. Peter's mom will definitely give her a piece of her mind though. I wonder if Dean will show up to offer his support to Jason and Peter, he could always get his grandparents to take him to the hospital!! Great chapter!! 1
Andrew Q Gordon Posted January 6, 2011 Author Posted January 6, 2011 ................Benji's koolaid?? Jason was too kind in speaking to mommy dearest, I doubt I could have hold back my tongue on her. Peter's mom will definitely give her a piece of her mind though. I wonder if Dean will show up to offer his support to Jason and Peter, he could always get his grandparents to take him to the hospital!! Great chapter!! Yeah Benji-Aid. You are creating a whole class of folks who will be sorely disappointed IF Ray and Flora don't show up to help Jason. Just remember, perfect families don''t have problems for others to see, not even family members. Who's to say the grandparents don't see the news and not think Barbara would be upset - I mean they didn't raise her to be like that - did they??? Hmmm. Just saying - that's all. 1
Ramon Posted January 7, 2011 Posted January 7, 2011 Yeah Benji-Aid. You are creating a whole class of folks who will be sorely disappointed IF Ray and Flora don't show up to help Jason. Just remember, perfect families don''t have problems for others to see, not even family members. Who's to say the grandparents don't see the news and not think Barbara would be upset - I mean they didn't raise her to be like that - did they??? Hmmm. Just saying - that's all. I drank that kool-aid a while ago so I'm gonna stick with the grandparents coming to the rescue if needed. I think the only way they don't is if Mrs. G manages to knock some sense into Barbara during their talk or if Jason pretends all is well and manages to convince them. The latter is very sketchy so it will be up to Mrs. G. There is also the possibility of both Mrs. G succeeding and the grandparents helping. Anyway, my point is that the grandparents will be there. No matter how much you try to convince us otherwise! 1
Andrew Q Gordon Posted January 7, 2011 Author Posted January 7, 2011 I drank that kool-aid a while ago so I'm gonna stick with the grandparents coming to the rescue if needed. I think the only way they don't is if Mrs. G manages to knock some sense into Barbara during their talk or if Jason pretends all is well and manages to convince them. The latter is very sketchy so it will be up to Mrs. G. There is also the possibility of both Mrs. G succeeding and the grandparents helping. Anyway, my point is that the grandparents will be there. No matter how much you try to convince us otherwise! OKay, since EVERYONE seems convinced Ray and Flora [the grandparents] are going to come to Jason's rescue let me say once and for all, in clear language - you will need to read chapter 28 to find out. But as I keep saying, Ray and Flora have NO idea there is a problem between Jason and Mom, neither side said anything - now of course Dean might have, but that is far fetched. But then again, how did they find out about Ethan and Aaron's problems, hmmmm Chapter 28 - Monday. 2
KevinD Posted January 8, 2011 Posted January 8, 2011 Here's a hint for you Andy - man does not live by kool-aid alone... We need something more substantial to get us through the weekend...something meaty to chew on; perhaps another chapter to read? ;-) 1
Sara Alva Posted January 8, 2011 Posted January 8, 2011 (edited) So now that I've read 27 I can safely post in your forum without fear of seeing spoilers :-) I was sorta mad at Peter for how he dealt with the "classes" issue. I mean, i think he was completely right to try to talk Jason out of it . . . but he could have been more diplomatic about it. You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar . . . I felt like he ratcheted up the level of that fight pretty quick. (BTW, this comment is solely for the purpose of letting you know what I was feeling while reading, NOT that I think you should have written the scene any differently. Human beings are not perfect, and it's usually only in hindsight that we figure out where we screwed up in situations such as that one). And then of course when he got hurt I couldn't care less what he said during the fight, because I was/am so worried for him Edited January 8, 2011 by KingdombytheSea 1
Andrew Q Gordon Posted January 8, 2011 Author Posted January 8, 2011 So now that I've read 27 I can safely post in your forum without fear of seeing spoilers :-) I was sorta mad at Peter for how he dealt with the "classes" issue. I mean, i think he was completely right to try to talk Jason out of it . . . but he could have been more diplomatic about it. You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar . . . I felt like he ratcheted up the level of that fight pretty quick. (BTW, this comment is solely for the purpose of letting you know what I was feeling while reading, NOT that I think you should have written the scene any differently. Human beings are not perfect, and it's usually only in hindsight that we figure out where we screwed up in situations such as that one). And then of course when he got hurt I couldn't care less what he said during the fight, because I was/am so worried for him I think they were both wrong in how they dealt with this, Jason recognized this and was trying to let Peter know that when - well when Peter was getting beat up and taken to the hospital. My goal is to try to make this as real as possible and to avoid as much of the fairy tale romance as I can. So yes sometimes things don't work out and sometimes people find ways to make things work. The other goal with the last couple chapters was to show a bit more of their characters. I think people spend the first so many months trying to curb their faults in an effort to 'make things work.' They also will over look things - warning signs - as well. I was trying to show a bit more of Peter's character - I don't want to point out what exactly I was trying to highlight because some of them are going to play a role in the end of the story but suffice it to say that there were some clues left here that will rear their head soon enough. Thanks for reading and for posting so much. I hope if you see things - like the POV issue you raised - you will let me know, be it here, or in a PM. I am fine with putting it here, that way everyone can see it. I will put the next chapter up soon, then no more cliffs for a while. promise. Andy
Andrew Q Gordon Posted January 8, 2011 Author Posted January 8, 2011 Here's a hint for you Andy - man does not live by kool-aid alone... We need something more substantial to get us through the weekend...something meaty to chew on; perhaps another chapter to read? ;-) Fine Kevin, I will put 28 up tomorrow instead of Monday - I just want to get a bit more written of the ending chapters before I post faster, or else y'all will be asking for more chapters and i won't have them in my hip pocket ready to go. [it takes a while pleasing my beta reader and editor so I can't post on demand like some people can. ] Thanks for reminding me that even Kool-Aid isn't sweet enough sometimes. Andy
Benji Posted January 8, 2011 Posted January 8, 2011 Fine Kevin, I will put 28 up tomorrow instead of Monday - I just want to get a bit more written of the ending chapters before I post faster, or else y'all will be asking for more chapters and i won't have them in my hip pocket ready to go. [it takes a while pleasing my beta reader and editor so I can't post on demand like some people can. ] Thanks for reminding me that even Kool-Aid isn't sweet enough sometimes. Andy ............I may drink kool-aid, but Andy is the one making it!! :lol:
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