Limericks Anyone?

[Mark92]

AAAwww too funny WTG KC will give a point when I get some Many thanks

 

 

 

Rustle was an old kind of putter

Walking his dogs he would mutter

I’m a nanny old crank

Who knows how to yank

Don’t believe me? I’ll show you my utter!

 

 

 

[Mark92]

Great Stuff Lugh Your really good at these lmao Many thanks

 

 

 

 

There once was a chatter named Trevor

who thought his rhymes were clever

but quiet he grew

when in came the Lugh

who said "meh, whatever"

 

[Mark92]

Hahahaha awww man thats funny hahhahaha tickled me Thanks Dannsar

 

 

 

 

A woman might buy a vibrator

Cos a man just can't titillate her

If he's been out on the drink

She'll say 'Away and rethink"

You'll no be gettin titty till later

 

Hahahahahaha awww Sweetcheeks one of the best hahahahaa awww man thanks

 

 

 

There once was a guy named Trevor,

who didn't understand the word "never",

They said, no more Second Shot,

he asked, why the Hell not?,

then he sulked and said, duh whatever.

 

Hahahahaah awwww man thats just Ewwww but fantastically funny Many thanks Dannsar

 

 

 

A weirdo went down the street belching

His rear end was fairly well squelching

The trouble, you see

Was the hamster in he

It's what happens if you get into felching

 

Awww man its hurting now hahahahahaha your amazing dude Many thanks man

 

 

 

 

Young Johnny was quite into spanking

In fact, partial to a bloody good tanking

With a slipper or cane

"Oh, give me some pain!,

Or maybe a bit of a planking!"

 

I owe you so many points man Awwww your far too funny well done and a HUGE thank you

 

 

Oh, there's nothing like spellbinding witches

Or even like sarky wee bitches

But what would we do?

If we didn't have Lugh

To sort all the tricky wee glitches

 

[Mark92]

Lugh you are to be congratulated, totally awesome Cant thank you enough

 

 

 

 

Skon wanted to be Shamus

his poetry could make him famous

because he was teased

he did not do as he pleased

seaman skon shamus the shameless

 

[Mark92]

What can I say Lugh your the king og limericks thanks again

 

 

 

Cailen is a prolific banner artist

The use of color and contrast, he’s harnessed

Do not bother to complain

If you think his banners are lame

He’s colorblind, not modest.

 

Nice and sweet Greg thankyou man, point when I get some

 

 

 

One more from me inspired by all your posts and the various back stories:

 

 

The GA residents have such skills

Their talents offer so many thrills

A story, poem or post

Friendship at it's most

A place in our heart it fulfills

 

[Cailen]

There once was a man with a sock

He wore it whenever he walked

But not on his feet

Oh isn't that neat

But instead around his fat cock

[Cailen]

There once was a karate jock

With a soccer boy went for a walk

Till an old friend betrayed

And their love was dismayed

That's Second Shot's Plot that I mock!

[Dannsar]

There once was a karate jock

With a soccer boy went for a walk

Till an old friend betrayed

And their love was dismayed

That's Second Shot's Plot that I mock!

 

Trevor will have u for that one Cail! Damn good though!

[Dannsar]

Not sure of the reason to be

Unconvinced he could actually see

But with his hand in his nix

With a right box of tricks

He wasn't too bothered, tee hee

[Dannsar]

Bumping and grinding is fun

So's the exhaustion when done

It's the skin on the skin

The howling and din

What a fetish to dress as a nun!

[Dannsar]

Oh I do like to ride escalator

Eye level with man ass - nought's greater

In faded blue jeans, the fun's

Keeping yer hand off the buns

And it helps with the beating off later

[Dannsar]

Teen boys have good manual dexterity

They need this to manage severity

Of burns to the shaft

Which may need a skin graft

From shuffling knuckles 'in territory'

[Dannsar]

Lassies are roundness and mounds

But have not the gamut of sounds

Like guys at orgasm

Tight jerky and spasm

Who bay at the moon like the hounds

[akisar61]

This is all I can remember about The Good Ship Venus, add to it if you know others

 

 

T’was on the good ship Venus

 

Good God you should have seen us

 

The figurehead was a whore in bed

 

And the captain’s name was penis.

 

 

Now the captain of this lugger

 

He was a dirty bugger

 

He wasn’t fit to shovel shit

 

From one ship to another.

 

 

The cabin boy was kipper

 

He was a crafty nipper

 

He stuffed his arse with broken glass

 

And circumcised the skipper.

 

 

The first mates name was Harper

 

He was a musical farter.

 

He could fart anything From God save the King

 

To Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata.

[Mark92]

And I was with with you when you did this, LOL Well done Cailen and thank you

 

There once was a man with a sock

He wore it whenever he walked

But not on his feet

Oh isn't that neat

But instead around his fat cock

 

[Mark92]

Oh boy i need so many points to keep up with you guys LOL Trev will have your nads Cailen Thanks a lot

 

 

There once was a karate jock

With a soccer boy went for a walk

Till an old friend betrayed

And their love was dismayed

That's Second Shot's Plot that I mock!

 

Love this dude LOL keep em coming and I will catch up with points

 

 

Not sure of the reason to be

Unconvinced he could actually see

But with his hand in his nix

With a right box of tricks

He wasn't too bothered, tee hee

 

:lmao:Too funny man Thanks

 

 

 

 

Bumping and grinding is fun

So's the exhaustion when done

It's the skin on the skin

The howling and din

What a fetish to dress as a nun!

 

good one, Thank you

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh I do like to ride escalator

Eye level with man ass - nought's greater

In faded blue jeans, the fun's

Keeping yer hand off the buns

And it helps with the beating off later

 

Sounds like me Thanks

 

 

 

Teen boys have good manual dexterity

They need this to manage severity

Of burns to the shaft

Which may need a skin graft

From shuffling knuckles 'in territory'

 

I'm a noisy one too LMAO Thanks

 

 

 

Lassies are roundness and mounds

But have not the gamut of sounds

Like guys at orgasm

Tight jerky and spasm

Who bay at the moon like the hounds

 

[Mark92]

lmao Ive never heard this before so incredibly funny, i'm all out of points but will catch up Many thanks

 

 

 

 

 

This is all I can remember about The Good Ship Venus, add to it if you know others

 

 

T’was on the good ship Venus

 

Good God you should have seen us

 

The figurehead was a whore in bed

 

And the captain’s name was penis.

 

 

Now the captain of this lugger

 

He was a dirty bugger

 

He wasn’t fit to shovel shit

 

From one ship to another.

 

 

The cabin boy was kipper

 

He was a crafty nipper

 

He stuffed his arse with broken glass

 

And circumcised the skipper.

 

 

The first mates name was Harper

 

He was a musical farter.

 

He could fart anything From God save the King

 

To Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata.

 

[Dannsar]

Akisar ... the chorus ...

jigging in the rigging

jigging in the rigging

jigging in the rigging

cos there's jig all else to do

[akisar61]

Dannsar

Yeah now I remeber that bit, but do you know any other verses.

 

Akisar ... the chorus ...

jigging in the rigging

jigging in the rigging

jigging in the rigging

cos there's jig all else to do

 

[Dannsar]

Dannsar

Yeah now I remeber that bit, but do you know any other verses.

 

Nah, sorry ... I was a good boy and sat away from the back of the bus on the way home from school

[Andrew Q Gordon]

There once was a karate jock

With a soccer boy went for a walk

Till an old friend betrayed

And their love was dismayed

That's Second Shot's Plot that I mock!

 

 

Trevor will have u for that one Cail! Damn good though!

 

Forget Trevor, what about me?

 

I mean I know y'all think Trevor wrote it, but um yeah it was my baby, not his.

 

Definitely not finding it cool.

 

okay so maybe I did smirk a bit. lol

[Dannsar]

Someone lumped Lugh with the Lazies

We think he's one of the crazies

His death was quite quick

Presto ... knifety flick

And now he's just kicking up daisies

[Andrew Q Gordon]

Forget Trevor, what about me?

 

I mean I know y'all think Trevor wrote it, but um yeah it was my baby, not his.

 

Definitely not finding it cool.

 

okay so maybe I did smirk a bit. lol

 

FYI, lest anyone think I'm mad, I thought it was cute.

[K.C.]

There once was a man from Texas.

Who asked how big his ass is.

Don’t you dare stare,

‘Cause he lost his underwear.

And his reflection done broke my new glasses.

[SynthSky]

There once was a man from Muskogee

His limericks always rhymed with three

I don't know why