astone2292 Posted January 31, 2021 Posted January 31, 2021 29 minutes ago, Valkyrie said: Granted. You no longer smoke cigarettes, but are overcome with an overwhelming urge to eat them all instead. I wish I didn't have to use my CPAP every night. Granted! You no longer need your CPAP every night, but now you need it during the day. I wish I had the power to fly.
Wesley8890 Posted January 31, 2021 Posted January 31, 2021 28 minutes ago, astone2292 said: Granted! You no longer need your CPAP every night, but now you need it during the day. I wish I had the power to fly. Granted, but now you're a mosquito I wish the squirrel who gnawed a hole in my cieling would stop wakimg me up so early in the mornong!
Site Administrator Valkyrie Posted January 31, 2021 Site Administrator Posted January 31, 2021 5 minutes ago, Wesley8890 said: Granted, but now you're a mosquito I wish the squirrel who gnawed a hole in my cieling would stop wakimg me up so early in the mornong! Granted. Now a whole family of raccoons have moved into the attic and throw wild parties all night, keeping you from getting any sleep. I wish it wasn't so cold out.
astone2292 Posted January 31, 2021 Posted January 31, 2021 9 minutes ago, Valkyrie said: Granted. Now a whole family of raccoons have moved into the attic and throw wild parties all night, keeping you from getting any sleep. I wish it wasn't so cold out. Granted! It's now 75 degrees Fahrenheit, but a tornado is above your neighborhood. I wish for a pizza.
Site Administrator Valkyrie Posted January 31, 2021 Site Administrator Posted January 31, 2021 6 minutes ago, astone2292 said: Granted! It's now 75 degrees Fahrenheit, but a tornado is above your neighborhood. I wish for a pizza. Mmmm... pizza! It feels like sacrilege to do this, but I shall corrupt your pizza Here's your pizza--it's cheese and sürstromming, with pickled herring sauce. Oh and it's not mozzarella cheese, it's cazu martzu (aka maggot cheese ) Enjoy! I wish my laundry was done. 1
astone2292 Posted January 31, 2021 Posted January 31, 2021 30 minutes ago, Valkyrie said: Mmmm... pizza! It feels like sacrilege to do this, but I shall corrupt your pizza Here's your pizza--it's cheese and sürstromming, with pickled herring sauce. Oh and it's not mozzarella cheese, it's cazu martzu (aka maggot cheese ) Enjoy! I wish my laundry was done. Granted! You're laundry is done, but you forgot to clean out the lint trap and now your dryer is on fire. I wish my dishes were done! 1
Site Administrator Valkyrie Posted January 31, 2021 Site Administrator Posted January 31, 2021 2 minutes ago, astone2292 said: Granted! You're laundry is done, but you forgot to clean out the lint trap and now your dryer is on fire. I wish my dishes were done! Granted! Your dog was nice enough to clean all your dishes for you by licking them clean after he licked... well, you know I wish I had a jacuzzi tub. 1
astone2292 Posted January 31, 2021 Posted January 31, 2021 22 minutes ago, Valkyrie said: Granted! Your dog was nice enough to clean all your dishes for you by licking them clean after he licked... well, you know I wish I had a jacuzzi tub. Jesus! I needed a minute after that! Granted, but the technicians who installed it thought they were installing an outdoor hot tub...on your front porch. I wish for an endless supply of toilet paper. Take that you hoarders! 1
Site Administrator Valkyrie Posted January 31, 2021 Site Administrator Posted January 31, 2021 Granted! You have an endless supply of toilet paper! In fact, you have so much it now fills your entire house, leaving no room for you to live there. I wish my house would clean itself.
astone2292 Posted January 31, 2021 Posted January 31, 2021 Just now, Valkyrie said: Granted! You have an endless supply of toilet paper! In fact, you have so much it now fills your entire house, leaving no room for you to live there. I wish my house would clean itself. Granted! You now have a Roomba on every wall, floorspace, and ceiling in every room. And they send you lots of texts that tell you that, "I'm stuck on a cliff!" or, "I'm full! Empty me!" I wish for a walk-in shower!
Site Administrator Valkyrie Posted January 31, 2021 Site Administrator Posted January 31, 2021 14 minutes ago, astone2292 said: Granted! You now have a Roomba on every wall, floorspace, and ceiling in every room. And they send you lots of texts that tell you that, "I'm stuck on a cliff!" or, "I'm full! Empty me!" I wish for a walk-in shower! Granted! You have a beautiful walk-in shower with multiple showerheads and jets, a bench on the side, and shelves for shampoo and soap. But it's only a walk-in shower... you will never walk out! I wish lunch was ready. 1
astone2292 Posted January 31, 2021 Posted January 31, 2021 11 minutes ago, Valkyrie said: Granted! You have a beautiful walk-in shower with multiple showerheads and jets, a bench on the side, and shelves for shampoo and soap. But it's only a walk-in shower... you will never walk out! I wish lunch was ready. Granted! Gordon Ramsay has prepared your dream meal and has set the table with everything you need. At his house. I wish I could get a pedicure. 1
Site Administrator Valkyrie Posted January 31, 2021 Site Administrator Posted January 31, 2021 2 minutes ago, astone2292 said: Granted! Gordon Ramsay has prepared your dream meal and has set the table with everything you need. At his house. I wish I could get a pedicure. Granted! *readies the power sander and nail polish* I wish I had an iPhone.
astone2292 Posted January 31, 2021 Posted January 31, 2021 Just now, Valkyrie said: Granted! *readies the power sander and nail polish* I wish I had an iPhone. Granted! You receive your new phone, but your salesman misheard what you wanted, so your new phone is in the shape of an eyeball. I wish for a day off work. 1
Site Administrator Valkyrie Posted January 31, 2021 Site Administrator Posted January 31, 2021 6 minutes ago, astone2292 said: Granted! You receive your new phone, but your salesman misheard what you wanted, so your new phone is in the shape of an eyeball. I wish for a day off work. Granted. You can have all the days off you want, since you no longer have a job. I wish for a warm, fuzzy blanket.
astone2292 Posted January 31, 2021 Posted January 31, 2021 9 minutes ago, Valkyrie said: Granted. You can have all the days off you want, since you no longer have a job. I wish for a warm, fuzzy blanket. Granted! You now have a warm and fuzzy blanket made of belly button lint. I wish for world peace! 1
Parker Owens Posted January 31, 2021 Posted January 31, 2021 Granted. The lovely bowl of mushy, green paste in front of you is exactly what you asked for: Whirled Peas. I wish for some inspiration... 3
astone2292 Posted January 31, 2021 Posted January 31, 2021 Granted! You're mind is now filled with enough ideas and concepts to write a library's worth of material. The only problem is that your newfound ideas are all for baby and toddler books. I wish for a new coffee maker!
Site Moderator drpaladin Posted January 31, 2021 Site Moderator Posted January 31, 2021 16 minutes ago, astone2292 said: Granted! You're mind is now filled with enough ideas and concepts to write a library's worth of material. The only problem is that your newfound ideas are all for baby and toddler books. I wish for a new coffee maker! Granted. You are given the most advanced coffee maker ever made. The AI is so particular it refuses to make coffee out of the products you provide. I wish for three hours of motivation a day.
astone2292 Posted February 1, 2021 Posted February 1, 2021 19 hours ago, drpaladin said: Granted. You are given the most advanced coffee maker ever made. The AI is so particular it refuses to make coffee out of the products you provide. I wish for three hours of motivation a day. Granted! You have three hours of unadulterated pep-in-yo-step! But after those three hours are up, you will need to sleep for the remaining twenty-one hours. I wish I didn't need to sleep.
Site Administrator Valkyrie Posted February 1, 2021 Site Administrator Posted February 1, 2021 52 minutes ago, astone2292 said: Granted! You have three hours of unadulterated pep-in-yo-step! But after those three hours are up, you will need to sleep for the remaining twenty-one hours. I wish I didn't need to sleep. Granted! You no longer have the need to sleep because you're a zombie. Unfortunately, being a zombie means being ostracized by society and routinely having to run from pitchfork and torch bearing mobs. I wish my cats didn't feel the need to sing the song of their people loudly and repeatedly at three am every day. 1
astone2292 Posted February 1, 2021 Posted February 1, 2021 1 minute ago, Valkyrie said: Granted! You no longer have the need to sleep because you're a zombie. Unfortunately, being a zombie means being ostracized by society and routinely having to run from pitchfork and torch bearing mobs. I wish my cats didn't feel the need to sing the song of their people loudly and repeatedly at three am every day. Granted! Your cats now respect your time constraints and have moved their concert to four in the morning. I wish I wasn't allergic to dogs.
Site Administrator Valkyrie Posted February 1, 2021 Site Administrator Posted February 1, 2021 6 minutes ago, astone2292 said: Granted! Your cats now respect your time constraints and have moved their concert to four in the morning. I wish I wasn't allergic to dogs. Granted! You are no longer allergic to dogs; however, they are allergic to you I wish I had a cookie.
astone2292 Posted February 1, 2021 Posted February 1, 2021 1 minute ago, Valkyrie said: Granted! You are no longer allergic to dogs; however, they are allergic to you I wish I had a cookie. That! Is so dastardly!!! Granted! Upon vacuuming under your couch, you have found the cookie. Good luck guessing how long that's been there. I wish more people would join in on this forum game. 1
Site Administrator Valkyrie Posted February 1, 2021 Site Administrator Posted February 1, 2021 14 minutes ago, astone2292 said: That! Is so dastardly!!! Granted! Upon vacuuming under your couch, you have found the cookie. Good luck guessing how long that's been there. I wish more people would join in on this forum game. Granted! Every single GA member decides to play this game at the same time, which crashes the site. I wish for a non-moldy cookie
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now