Corrupt A Wish

[AK79]

Your task is simple:

Grant the wish made by the user above you, while at the same time corrupting it in whatever way you wish to make it different than what the previous user originally intended.

Afterwards, you make your own wish, which in turn will be corrupted by the next user.

 

For example:

USER A: I wish I had a million dollars.

USER B: Granted. You now have one million dollars.  In monopoly money.

I wish I had a steak.

USER C: Granted. It’s made out of rubber.

I wish Batman was real.

--

I’ll start.

 

i wish I had a sandwich.

[William King]

Granted - you have a sandwich board and you have to wear it all day, walking up and down the street, from 9AM to 5PM.

 

I wish I had a luxury yatch and could sail the seven seas.

[Ron]

Granted: You now have luxury yacht called The 7 C's—matchbox size.

 

I wish that I had a doughnut.

[AK79]

Granted. A toilet doughnut. Your hemorrhoids thank you.

 

I wish I didn't have to shave tomorrow.

[Ron]

That's... That's just rude man!?

[Valkyrie]

2 hours ago, AK79 said:

Granted. A toilet doughnut. Your hemorrhoids thank you.

  

 

I wish I didn't have to shave tomorrow.

You don't have to shave because you are now a baby again.  

 

I wish it would stop raining.  

[Graeme]

Granted: It never rains again, all the crops die and billions starve to death.

 

I wish everyone was happy.

[AK79]

2 hours ago, Ron said:

That's... That's just rude man!?

 

Well it was either that or I corrupted the wish by breaking his plumbing.  Given the choice, I think I picked the least inconvenient.  Also this thread should be taken mostly as a joke.

 

6 minutes ago, Graeme said:

Granted: It never rains again, all the crops die and billions starve to death.

 

I wish everyone was happy.

 

Granted, everyone is happy.  However, there is a world wide pandemic that wipes out all of humanity except for your least favorite person.

 

I wish for a nice cup of tea.

[Valkyrie]

Here you go.  A nice cup of stinkweed tea.  You can enjoy it with a toilet donut.   

 

I wish I was married to Chris Hemsworth.  

[Brayon]

Granted. But he dies suddenly on your wedding night.

 

I wish I won the lottery.

[AK79]

Granted--but the prize was had been reset the previous week and you have to split it with 15 other winners.

 

I wish this streaming service would hurry up.  I want to watch Total Eclipse with my man.

[Valkyrie]

 

Congrats!  You won the lottery!  A jackpot of ten dollars!   

 

Your streaming service works so fast, it plays the entire movie in one minute. 

 

I wish I was on vacation. 

Edited May 6, 2017 by Valkyrie

[Brayon]

3 minutes ago, AK79 said:

Granted--but the prize was had been reset the previous week and you have to split it with 15 other winners.

 

I wish this streaming service would hurry up.  I want to watch Total Eclipse with my man.

 

 

 

3 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

 

Congrats!  You won the lottery!  A jackpot of ten dollars!   

 

I wish I was on vacation. 

 

 

Splitting a Jackpot of $10.00 with 15 others...

 

Both are granted. The Streaming Service speeds up, but is now stuck on straight food fetish porn. Then suddenly, Valkyrie is there on Vacation for the next week.

 

I wish I was elected POTUS.

Edited May 6, 2017 by BHopper2

[Valkyrie]

1 minute ago, BHopper2 said:

 

Splitting a Jackpot with 15 others...

 

Both are granted. The Streaming Service speeds up, but is now stuck on straight food fetish porn. Then suddenly, Valkyrie is there on Vacation for the next week.

 

I wish I was elected POTUS.

Maybe I like that...     

 

I'm not sure I need to corrupt that wish.  It's a thankless enough job as it is...  

 

I wish I had a cheesecake. 

[AK79]

Granted--unfortunately to get the cheesecake you have to eat it as part of BHopper's straight food fetish porn.

 

I wish my dog would come out from under the bed.  (He's mad at me, I gave him a bath today.)

[Greg_A]

Granted.  Your dog comes out from under the bed and decides to bite you on the butt to punish you for the bath.

(Maybe you can borrow that donut from above?

 

I wish I knew what to make for dinner.

[Arpeggio]

You decide on what to make dinner, but you can't cook until all your dirty dishes are clean, and there is a TON of them! 

 

I wish it would stop raining.

[Ron]

Granted. Now you know what to make for dinner but you don't have the ingredients.

 

I wish I had no need for a doughnut.

 

Edit: never mind.

Edited May 7, 2017 by Ron

[Brayon]

Granted... but it turns REALLY COLD, and the rain becomes Snow.

 

 

I wish my Ex-BF would stop pestering me.

[AK79]

Granted but my bad Ex-BF pesters you instead.  (Careful with that one he has self-destructive tendencies and a drugs habit.)

 

I wish this frozen salmon didn't taste like frozen.

[Valkyrie]

The salmon turns into a live fish and smacks you upside the head. 

 

I wish @BHopper2 hadn't turned the rain into snow.   (and yes... we really do have snow in the forecast for tomorrow!) 

[Greg_A]

Granted.  But now instead of snow in the forecast you have volcanic ash instead.

 

I wish the cute neighbor guy would walk around his house naked more often!

[Valkyrie]

Granted, but he has so much body hair that's so long it's all braided in dreds and man buns.   

 

I wish I could have a night of uninterrupted sleep.  

[Ron]

Granted, but when you wake up no one remembers you.?

 

I wish the the elephant wasn't in the room. Damn that doughnut!

[AK79]

Granted.  The elephant is replaced by an eight hundred pound gorilla instead.

 

I wish my nephew would quit eating all my gelato. Seriously no 14 year old is a foodie!