[Krista] Roommates (Complete)

[Krista]

Hello,

 

This is the new story of mine and I haven't gotten any feedback on it, so I've decided to open a discussion about it. There is only one chapter as of right now, but I do plan on doing some writing today and hopefully everything will go smooth enough for me to get the second chapter wrote.

 

Anyway, I'm sorry about the spacing issues I'm having. I only use one line between paragraphs and dialogue, but it comes out being a good couple of centimeters.. lol. I took away the spacing, but I forgot to post it, and I was too lazy to go back through again and do all that space changing again. The next chapter WILL have that fixed so that the reading can go a lot more smoothly with/out so much scrolling.

 

So, other than the "rough edges" of the story that I know is there, lol, what is there to discuss about it?

 

If you need the link to the story, here is is,

 

Roommates

 

 

Thanks,

 

Krista

[Krista]

Hey,

 

Chapter two is now posted. I'm hoping that the new chapter does start some sort of discussion here since there's more to work with.. lol. If you're not willing to post comments here then feel free to e-mail me or something.

 

Even if you just come here and say, "Hey, I'm reading this story." It'd make me feel a little bit better about this story...

 

 

Here's the link to the new chapter,

 

Chapter Two

 

I fixed the spacing, it looks better now.

 

Thanks,

 

Krista

[Kat]

Hey Krista! I just read the first 2 chapters and I really like it. Brett is hilarious! I have a few friends like him :wacko: I can't wait till the next chapter!

I'm so glad you started another one! I miss reading all your stories

Edited March 22, 2007 by Kat

[Rabble_Rouser]

Hey Krista! I enjoyed the first two chapters. I liked the Characters, especially Brett, and I love the fact I have no idea where you're going with this!

 

Cheers

 

Steve

[Krista]

Hey Krista! I just read the first 2 chapters and I really like it. Brett is hilarious! I have a few friends like him :wacko: I can't wait till the next chapter!

I'm so glad you started another one! I miss reading all your stories

 

 

Hey, thanks, yeah Brett is some guy, heh?

 

Lol, I wanted this story to be different. More laughs than serious parts. I just hope I can maintain the comedy, if there is any to begin with.

 

Thanks for reading Kat!

 

 

Krista

[Krista]

Hey Krista! I enjoyed the first two chapters. I liked the Characters, especially Brett, and I love the fact I have no idea where you're going with this!

 

Cheers

 

Steve

 

 

Hi Steve,

 

I likes Brett's character too, there's hardly any limitations for him I think and I wanted a character like that. It's refreshing for me to write a story like this, away from all of the "dramatic" ones that I do.

 

Anyway, thanks for reading!

 

Krista

[Ieshwar]

Hi Krista,

 

I have read the first chapter and it's awesome! The characters are just amazing. I mean, who wouldn't like Brett? It was quite funny when he wanted to leave Mark!

 

I just saved the second chapter in my pc. Gonna read it soon.

 

C ya later and keep writing!

Ieshwar

[Krista]

Hi Krista,

 

I have read the first chapter and it's awesome! The characters are just amazing. I mean, who wouldn't like Brett? It was quite funny when he wanted to leave Mark!

 

I just saved the second chapter in my pc. Gonna read it soon.

 

C ya later and keep writing!

Ieshwar

 

 

Hey,

 

Thanks for the compliments. I tried really hard making Brett's character different from anyone I've wrote about before. I was actually a little apprehensive, because I didn't know if he would be a likable character or not.

 

Anyway, I hope you like chapter two.

 

Krista

[writeincode]

I can't help but feeling that the last sentence was somewhat of an extended cliffhanger...

 

Waiting impatiently for chapter 3

Edited March 25, 2007 by writeincode

[Ieshwar]

Oh Krista,

 

I strongly believe you got yourself a new fan! And this one is kinda nut and he wants MORE!

 

I have read the first chapter and it was like 'WOW'! I read the second chapter and it was like 'WOW'! I can see where the story is going- a yatch trip cut off from the world, with two billionaires, a hot gay in closet, a hot gurl and a hotter guy in between! So cool.

 

So I'm waiting for the third chapter. Please do quick!

 

A nutty fan :wacko:

Ieshwar

[Krista]

I can't help but feeling that the last sentence was somewhat of an extended cliffhanger...

 

Waiting impatiently for chapter 3

 

Lol.. an extended cliffhanger... maybe.

 

Krista

[Krista]

Oh Krista,

 

I strongly believe you got yourself a new fan! And this one is kinda nut and he wants MORE!

 

I have read the first chapter and it was like 'WOW'! I read the second chapter and it was like 'WOW'! I can see where the story is going- a yatch trip cut off from the world, with two billionaires, a hot gay in closet, a hot gurl and a hotter guy in between! So cool.

 

So I'm waiting for the third chapter. Please do quick!

 

A nutty fan :wacko:

Ieshwar

 

 

Lol... thanks .. Maybe I should spend a lot more time tossing and turning...

 

 

Krista

[zapthestarz]

Oh cool! You're starting a new story. I'll have to check it out.

 

I really loved "Are you Christian." Any chance you're gonna finish it?!

[Krista]

Oh cool! You're starting a new story. I'll have to check it out.

 

I really loved "Are you Christian." Any chance you're gonna finish it?!

 

 

Hey,

 

I will finish, "Are Yoy Christian," one of these days. Just not for a little while as this story is the one that will occupy all of my time.

 

Krista

[Krista]

Hello,

 

 

I finally finished the latest chapter to this story. Trying to maintain these characters are going to be a challenge for me. I know how I want this story to go and keeping the characters entertaining will be something else.. lol.

 

Anyway, I hope this new chapter continues the story just as good as the other two.

 

 

Here's the link: Chapter 3

 

 

Thanks for reading and commenting so far,

 

Krista

[writeincode]

LOOOVVVIINNNGGG IT!

The whole, always ending up in bed together thing definately forshadows the destination of their relationship.... YAY!!!!!!

Edited April 13, 2007 by writeincode

[Krista]

LOOOVVVIINNNGGG IT!

The whole, always ending up in bed together thing definately forshadows the destination of their relationship.... YAY!!!!!!

 

 

lol...foreshadowing?

 

I guess we'll just have to wait and see.

 

Anyway, seriously, thanks for reading and liking this story and commenting.. lol. All of that really makes me want to work harder so that people don't have to wait weeks between chapters.

 

Krista

[york366]

Krista, I am really enjoying your story. It's refreshing to read something different from all the other run of the mill stories. Your characters have life and dimension, the dialogue is real and not cliche, your storyline is interesting and keeps the reader wanting more. For weeks, I have unsuccessfully tried to find a good story to read and I am glad to finally find something that I enjoy reading. Keep up the good work!

[Krista]

Krista, I am really enjoying your story. It's refreshing to read something different from all the other run of the mill stories. Your characters have life and dimension, the dialogue is real and not cliche, your storyline is interesting and keeps the reader wanting more. For weeks, I have unsuccessfully tried to find a good story to read and I am glad to finally find something that I enjoy reading. Keep up the good work!

 

Hey,

 

Lol, this is the best comment I've read all week. I'm glad you like my characters for this story as they're all so different from what I'm used to. I mean, I'm finally using slang... lol. I've not liked using slang all that much lol, but anyway, thanks for reading this story and commenting.

 

Krista

[Krista]

Hello,

 

Here is the link to chapter 4

 

Click Here

 

 

One thing that I've not anticipated with this story is having things for them to do while their on the Yacht.. lol. There's only so much you can do out on the ocean so that's going to be a challege for them to be active and entertaining.

 

Anyway, I hope you like this new chapter.

 

Krista

[writeincode]

I mean, I'm finally using slang... lol.

Wasn't Something Unexpected chock full of slang?

 

One thing that I've not anticipated with this story is having things for them to do while their on the Yacht.. lol. There's only so much you can do out on the ocean so that's going to be a challege for them to be active and entertaining.

Gosh if removing each other's clothing is a yacht pass time let Brett and Will stay on a yacht forever

 

Loving it. I was craving this chapter.

[Camilla]

Hi,

 

I just wanna say, that I really like your story. It's great!!

 

Camilla.

[Krista]

Wasn't Something Unexpected chock full of slang?

Gosh if removing each other's clothing is a yacht pass time let Brett and Will stay on a yacht forever

 

Loving it. I was craving this chapter.

 

 

Hey,

 

Lol... I think Something Unexpected was just rough.

 

 

The snorkeling and the family portrait painting was what I needed to plan out for them to pass the time in the chapter and interact with all the main characters. The undressing is of things to come.

 

Thanks for reading!

 

Krista

[Krista]

Hi,

 

I just wanna say, that I really like your story. It's great!!

 

Camilla.

 

 

Hi Camilla,

 

Thanks for reading my new story and your comments.

 

Krista

[Bondwriter]

Nice story. The characters are very vivid in the reader's mind (at least mine, but apparently others share this POV). Brett's character is really funny, and he gives hilarious lines. A nicely done "poor rich kids" story.