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    Mikiesboy
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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

Musings of a Messed Up Mind - 8. More from a drug free mind

Read em if you dare...

Dorian's Mirror

Sleep is stolen by my haunted dreams
And shame shadows my face
Look in the mirror if you dare.
There’s nothing you’d want to see
Remember Dorian Gray, you whore?
Remember the price he paid.

 

No Way Back

There is no free ride you know,
not even the one to hell.

The ferryman demands his price, or
the Devil will take his due.

What’s left of your miserable soul,
is what he’ll demand of you.

And pay you will as there is no choice.

The road you travel’s your own, made of
crosses you bear and the lies written there
and the bricks you made of stone.

There is no way back once you’re on this track
and you know that you’re a fool.

Knowledge is king yet you ignore the very thing
that may offer salvation to you.

Once a whore that’s ever you are;
there was never any hope for you.

Copyright © 2017 Mikiesboy; All Rights Reserved.
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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

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I'm sure there are people in this world who live their lives as ""Dorian Gray" to the extreme. They think only of themselves and to hell with everyone else. They don't seek forgiveness or redemption, their only goal is to cover up their "crimes". So when it is their time, well we know where they are likely to be going...
Then there are those "Dorian Gray's" who break free and take a good look in the mirror - love the change from portrait to mirror btw, it actually makes a lot of sense. Changing your ways and conquering bad habits is something to be recognized and applauded.
Not everyone will value that change, but some will and their opinion is the only one that counts.
Okay, bit of a ramble in my review, but I couldn't help it Tim, your words are just amazing and really make me think. Hopefully, I'm not to far off the mark on this one. :thumbup: :smile:

Your words are poignant. Too often we make foolish trades for transitory results.

 

Love is redemption ...

 

You are not a whore, you did not choose life as a rentboy, it was forced on you to survive. Please stop listening to the vitriol of those who used you in past and hear the words of those who love and care for you simply because you are you ... a soul of incomparable worth.

 

Love is redemption ...

 

You are redeemed.

 

I'm not going to apologize for big words, I know you'll look them up and that emphasizes your desire to grow beyond your past.

On 10/05/2015 03:06 AM, Headstall said:

It's terrific work, Tim. But I think I read it at the wrong time, because it frightened me, and my stomach roiled for a time. So much power here, but in reading it again, it still unsettles me. The emotion you can project through words is astounding... Gary...

You didn't read it wrong Gary. It was a poem of self-hatred, well they both were. There is nothing good in either of them. They are the result of a mind trying to adjust non-chemical support, nightmares and too little sleep.

 

I'm sorry if they upset you.

 

tim

On 10/04/2015 09:36 PM, dughlas said:

Your words are poignant. Too often we make foolish trades for transitory results.

 

Love is redemption ...

 

You are not a whore, you did not choose life as a rentboy, it was forced on you to survive. Please stop listening to the vitriol of those who used you in past and hear the words of those who love and care for you simply because you are you ... a soul of incomparable worth.

 

Love is redemption ...

 

You are redeemed.

 

I'm not going to apologize for big words, I know you'll look them up and that emphasizes your desire to grow beyond your past.

dugh, you know we've haven't talked much, but I have dictionary and I'm not afraid to use it. Mike begs me not to call myself that. I wrote more in the forum about what is going to change. Thank you for your support and for caring. I know I need to change things, I'm working on it..

 

tim

On 10/04/2015 04:23 PM, Reader1810 said:

I'm sure there are people in this world who live their lives as ""Dorian Gray" to the extreme. They think only of themselves and to hell with everyone else. They don't seek forgiveness or redemption, their only goal is to cover up their "crimes". So when it is their time, well we know where they are likely to be going...

Then there are those "Dorian Gray's" who break free and take a good look in the mirror - love the change from portrait to mirror btw, it actually makes a lot of sense. Changing your ways and conquering bad habits is something to be recognized and applauded.

Not everyone will value that change, but some will and their opinion is the only one that counts.

Okay, bit of a ramble in my review, but I couldn't help it Tim, your words are just amazing and really make me think. Hopefully, I'm not to far off the mark on this one. :thumbup: :smile:

I like your ramble ... the poems were me hating me. see the reply i gave to Gary. I'm forbidden to write this kind of thing...its positive or nothing... i see my output dropping dramatically.

 

thanks for your time.. hope these didnt upset you.

 

tim

I guess I'm with Gary on how these poems make me feel. On the one hand, I'm frightened and sad that you felt this way, and on the other, I'm glad to know you have moved beyond it.
I still hear it all the time, and we as LGBT people seem to never speak up and put a stop to it, but the so-called majority society has a way of demeaning and dismissing up with a single word - they say "Him, of he just a fag."
We are not just anything. We are everything, and those people are the real just-nothings in the history of contributions to humanity. Please don't ever forget that, ok?

On 11/24/2015 06:53 AM, AC Benus said:

I guess I'm with Gary on how these poems make me feel. On the one hand, I'm frightened and sad that you felt this way, and on the other, I'm glad to know you have moved beyond it.

I still hear it all the time, and we as LGBT people seem to never speak up and put a stop to it, but the so-called majority society has a way of demeaning and dismissing up with a single word - they say "Him, of he just a fag."

We are not just anything. We are everything, and those people are the real just-nothings in the history of contributions to humanity. Please don't ever forget that, ok?

Okay, AC. I won't forget it. Well I'm not just a fag... and neither are the people I know on here and elsewhere. We, all of us, contribute as much as our straight friends do. And yeah, it's time we said so

 

thanks AC

 

tim

The self loathing in both of these poems sounds like whine of a buzz saw in hardwood. So loud, so clear. They ring with hurt and the sorrow and hopelessness. They are devastatingly effective. I want to say I get this, share this, but we all have our own private hells we carry around with us. I offer you a deep hug and hope for clearer, better sight for both of us.

On 10/22/2016 01:50 PM, Parker Owens said:

The self loathing in both of these poems sounds like whine of a buzz saw in hardwood. So loud, so clear. They ring with hurt and the sorrow and hopelessness. They are devastatingly effective. I want to say I get this, share this, but we all have our own private hells we carry around with us. I offer you a deep hug and hope for clearer, better sight for both of us.

These were written almost a year ago. Life has become a bit easier for me. The dips into depression aren't so frequent or deep. But I still like the 2nd poem, though I think I'd like to think of a couple of different lines for the end.

 

Thanks Parker for going back to read these.

 

tim xo

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