Brandon Smiling: From the Billy Chase Chronicles (1) - 11. Entry 11

Nice one MrM!

In Brandon, we can appreciate what we only were guessing at from the original Billy chapters.
And Billy was chasing Simon pretty hard!

Is Jamie's sister a new character? I don't remember her, but it's been a while since I read the first Billy chapters.
Whether she was there or you created her, she fits perfectly. It also gives Jamie another dimension, as does his little posse.

Great job. I always look forward to one of these!

Brandon seeing Billy going after Simon and totally seeing that Simon is straight. I guess Brandon always had a better gaydar than Billy did

I don't remember the interaction between Billy and Brandon that much in the early chapters of Billy's journal, so I don't recall what Billy though of Brandon's behavior during this time. I know things didn't really pick up between them until the second book, Brandon was just one of like 20 crushes that Billy had at the time.

I will say, that I know this is written in a journal style, and it is very similar to Billy's journal, but you're doing a great job bringing Brandon to life. However that being said, I personally would like to see a little more action in the story and not so much sumerization. I think it'd make the story come to life a little better.

On 01/22/2016 05:13 AM, skinnydragon said:

Nice one MrM!

 

In Brandon, we can appreciate what we only were guessing at from the original Billy chapters.

And Billy was chasing Simon pretty hard!

 

Is Jamie's sister a new character? I don't remember her, but it's been a while since I read the first Billy chapters.

Whether she was there or you created her, she fits perfectly. It also gives Jamie another dimension, as does his little posse.

 

Great job. I always look forward to one of these!

Marie Cross is indeed a new character. I found her to be a good key to opening Brandon's foil vs. Billy's complete worship of Jamie. Brandon manages to get the contact and the interaction that Billy craves, but doesn't want it as he sees Jamie in an entirely different light than Billy. This also sets things up for why Brandon got invited to Jamie's parties in the future.

On 01/22/2016 06:43 AM, spikey582 said:

Brandon seeing Billy going after Simon and totally seeing that Simon is straight. I guess Brandon always had a better gaydar than Billy did

 

I don't remember the interaction between Billy and Brandon that much in the early chapters of Billy's journal, so I don't recall what Billy though of Brandon's behavior during this time. I know things didn't really pick up between them until the second book, Brandon was just one of like 20 crushes that Billy had at the time.

 

I will say, that I know this is written in a journal style, and it is very similar to Billy's journal, but you're doing a great job bringing Brandon to life. However that being said, I personally would like to see a little more action in the story and not so much sumerization. I think it'd make the story come to life a little better.

It's hard to get much action at this point in the story. Brandon's world is much more internal than Billy's. He's been a loner since he was very young and so he tends to be more introspective...hence the poetry. His life now consists of school, homework, basketball, video games, worrying about Marie, and Billy. If you can think back to being a teenager, things could be very simple and mundane most the time...especially for an only child with one working parent. Yet these mundane things could seem very big in your little world...because they were big to you. Things are going to dilate in the next entry. Trust me...you'll be happy for this calm before the coming storm.

I love how you have written Brandon's reactions and emotions towards Billy. He's such a sweet little romantic! 💗

Don't do it, Brandon, girls are not your thing and we all know that Billy's also barking up the wrong tree with straight Simon. 

On 1/21/2016 at 8:43 PM, spikey582 said:

Brandon seeing Billy going after Simon and totally seeing that Simon is straight. I guess Brandon always had a better gaydar than Billy did

 

I don't remember the interaction between Billy and Brandon that much in the early chapters of Billy's journal, so I don't recall what Billy though of Brandon's behavior during this time. I know things didn't really pick up between them until the second book, Brandon was just one of like 20 crushes that Billy had at the time.

 

I will say, that I know this is written in a journal style, and it is very similar to Billy's journal, but you're doing a great job bringing Brandon to life. However that being said, I personally would like to see a little more action in the story and not so much sumerization. I think it'd make the story come to life a little better.

" However that being said, I personally would like to see a little more action in the story and not so much sumerization. I think it'd make the story come to life a little better"

I agree with you to more action should be