Brian: Taking Courage - 25. Planning for Three

At their usual Sunday evening meal, Denise had something to tell them, Brian was pretty sure of that by the way his Mother seemed to be almost vibrating, with suppressed excitement or perhaps tension. Whatever it was, she thought it was good. As soon as Toby had excused himself from the table, Denise stopped tidying away the remains of dinner and sat back down at the kitchen table with Gordon and Brian.

"Deirdre has handed in her notice at the Spa."

Brian didn't both asking how his Mother knew, she had a wide network of friends and contacts, and her work still enabled her to keep up to date. He was pretty sure that she knew someone who worked at the Spa, or their mother, Brian couldn't remember which and it didn't really matter. What it meant was that, for better or worse, Denise had been able to keep tabs on Deirdre over the years. He blinked at his Mother, considering, "She's got a new job? Toby's not said anything."

Denise shook her head, "Daft thing, no. She's not got a new job. Her and Jasper are off. Travelling. Leastways, that's what Jasper's Mum says, she's evidently been full of it."

"Travelling as in a long holiday, or more of a permanent thing?", Gordon looked from Brian to Denise and back.

Denise shrugged, "Search me, love. They've talked about moving, certainly; they mentioned it to you, Brian."

"David said something, Deirdre talked to him about Jasper feeling he wasn’t appreciated here."

Denise pulled a face, "Evidently, Jasper has a mate who's started his own business on the South coast, Bournemouth way, I think."

Gordon nodded, "And sounds as if Deidre would be well placed to get a decent job, too, if she’s been, what, deputy manager for such a long time."

Denise sniffed, "Yes, I'll give her that. She's done well at the Spa, and they're bound to give her a good reference."

"I don't think Toby realises. He's mentioned that his Mum and Jasper are going on a long holiday, but I don't think it's occurred to him that she might not come back."

Denise gave another big sniff, "Rather depends on how she and that Jasper are fixed."

Gordon frowned, "But she's got to tell Toby, surely?"

"Maybe it's not settled."

"Or she's going to leave it to the last minute, like usual."

Brian stood up, "I think we should tell Toby."

Gordon stared, "That his Mother's going away?"

"No. Just what we know. She's given up her job and Jasper plans on travelling."

---

That evening, when they got home from Brian's Mum's, feeling more stuffed than usual, having had a good lunch and dinner, there was an email from Russ to Toby, with Brian copied in.

It was perfectly innocuous, yet thoughtful, following up on his gift with translations of the Italian growing instructions and descriptions of the plants, along with the local plant names, plus a couple of photos of the centre. Evidently the lunch guests had had a tour and Russ' pictures caught bored looking men and women in business suits amidst what looked like lively information boards. The email was signed, your friend, Mr Russ.

Toby was delighted. Which helped put him in a good mood, so Brian was able to broach the subject of Deirdre and Jasper. Toby took the news pretty well that his Mother had plans. But there'd been nothing concrete, which allowed for that little crack of hope that she wasn't disappearing altogether. He'd said he'd mention it at his next the next meal with her. The boy was a bit quiet for the rest of the evening, but they didn’t mention the subject again, instead had a cozy evening in front of the TV.

---

"You reckon Russ is OK?"

"You mean, is he chasing Toby for other, sexual motives?"

"Yeah, you do worry. Well, I do."

"So you should. And no. I don't think he's chasing Toby, more that it's a way through to us."

"You mean he wants another threesome, so he sends Toby presents?"

"Not so much, perhaps he's interested in more than that?"

"What Mum said about a built-in family."

"Well, he certainly slotted into lunch at Mum and Dad’s easily enough, seemed very at home."

"I've an idea."

"Am I going to like this?", Gordon smiled.

"We get together with him one Friday, meet up after work with Toby at that fancy burger place in Parborough and Russ comes too. Then we drop Toby off at your parents or my Mum's and he stays the night. And Russ comes here."

"Not exactly a luxury evening out."

"Look, if he wants to have fun with us, fine, but it's either we go to that penthouse of his all the time, or we share what we have."

Gordon smiled, "Fair enough. Let's ask and see what happens, meanwhile we have to practice." But conversation was halted as Toby appeared, full of his plans for school tomorrow.

---

"What d'you reckon?"

Brian laughed, "There's no way I'm flexible enough to do that, besides I'm a big bloke, that one’s hardly bigger than Toby."

"Yeah, I know, but it looks fun though", Gordon leered.

They were sitting in bed, watching porn. Gordon had let his subscription lapse for the site where he had been able to download porn films for watching whilst in the Emirate. The supply on that site had been copious, but of variable quality. Moreover, now, they rarely had time or inclination; more often than not, no extra stimulus was needed.

But, as an experiment, they had signed up for a site where the videos were 20 minutes, maximum, well filmed and with a nice mix of men. You could search by category, and tonight's was DP, double penetration. Most of the videos were sexy as hell, but not feasible for two burly ex-army men in their 30s. For, if Russ made good on his promise and was up for a re-match, then they had to be prepared. They ended up laughing and turned on as hell; they just forgot about the porn and made their own fun. Single penetration, but quiet and intense. The way they liked it.

It was Monday evening before Russ got back to them. He phoned around 9pm, luckily Toby was in his room watching a documentary whilst at the same time conducting a conversation by message with Noah. This was a new habit, the two would watch the same thing and comment to each other, a sort of DIY Gogglebox. Brian had discreetly managed to check Toby's phone, and the conversations were innocuous, all about the mating habits of Arctic terns or whatever the programme was about.

>I thought I'd better phone. A lot easier to make arrangements. Have you time?

"Yes, and Toby is in his room, so no problem there.”

>Didn't think of that.

Russ chuckled.

>I can be on for Friday. I'll be coming back from London, so shouldn't be late.

"There's a burger place in town, pricey one, their beef is organic and stuff, a lot of things about food-miles and off-setting. Toby loves it.

>Kid gets to eat burgers and save the planet.

"That's about it. We wondered if you'd join us. Rather than just dumping Toby on a parent. We can drop him off at Gordon's parents after the meal, and he'll stay the night. He's not done that before, so it should be a novelty for him."

>So he’ll be with us during the meal. That’s nice. And after, for us?

"You come back to our place for a night cap, or something."

>I think I'd like that.

"It's not grand, we can't entertain on your scale."

>Hey, my life isn't all grand. And hooking up with you two sounds great.

"Good. I'll get things organised."

>And Brian?

"Yes?"

>I like a bit of regular life. Lunch at Drew and Evie's was great. I don't do enough things like that, so thank you. And tell Toby, I can't wait for my organic beef-burger in a wholemeal bun with chips made from local potatoes.

"You gathered from the phone call that he's on. I think he likes the idea of doing something resembling ordinary life."

Gordon smiled, "Wait till he tries the burger. Oh, and that reminds me, we need some more lube."

"Excuse me? Burger. Lube."

"Just planning for Friday. We don't want to run out, do we?"

"We can stop off at Boots and get some after work, tomorrow."

"That reminds me, Hugh was talking about a meeting with Russ to finalise details of next week's event."

Gordon frowned at Brian, "And? Problem?"

Brian laughed, "Not at all. I said why not ask him to come on Monday, get him to the office."

"For Naked Monday? That I'd like to see. You think he'd be up for it?"

Brian shrugged, "He gets to show us off to his friends at the party, so it's only fair if he shows off to the rest of the firm." Gordon shook his head, laughing.

Amazingly, Ares had settled into a neat routine, and everyone stripped off. Brian and Gordon had got used to seeing colleagues' intimate parts and the old saying, 'Familiarity breeds contempt' was almost true. It had become natural, seeing Hugh's bum as he bent over or Connor's dick as it swung around. So far there had been no embarrassing moments and no suggestions of a dick measuring contest, thank goodness.

That afternoon, Damian had sat himself down in the chair between Gordon and Brian's desks, thus giving both men the dubious pleasure of a close-up view. Damian had been handsome once, but stress and over-indulgence meant things had started to expand and sag in all the wrong directions.

"I know that you blokes don't want to have to think about it, but it's only a few weeks till the Summer holidays."

Brian's heart sank, "Oh Lord, more logistics."

Damian smiled, "It's OK, you two have got on top of things, we can cope. Philippa's going to be around as she's not holidaying until September. What I wanted to ask is, are you planning on doing a proper holiday so you two will be off at the same time and take the nipper somewhere or are you going to play Cox & Box. If you did that, and took a few admin days at home each, you'd have a lot of child-sitting covered." He levered himself up, "No need to decide now, but I need to know soonish."

The two men stared at each other, Brian sighed, "We can check with Toby what he fancies, but I expect it'll be a holiday."

"Where would we go?"

"I can't see the three of us on a beach for two weeks, can you. A couple of days was enough for us two, last time, and as for Toby." He shrugged.

Gordon pulled a face, "One of those all-in resorts with activities for the children?"

Brian shook his head, "Can you honestly see my son enjoying the type of kids entertainment they provide? Paintball, football matches, tree-climbing and that."

Gordon smiled, "He's keeping a list, don't forget."

"Don't remind me. Bloody seal colony in the Farne Islands or something. I'll need to phone Deirdre, find out what her plans are." Brian pulled a face.

"Wonder what Noah's doing?"

Noah, it transpired, was going to be going on a grand tour of elderly relatives with two weeks touring the Highlands with his parents in the middle. According to Toby, Noah was dreading it.

Brian was cooking dinner for the two of them, when Toby appeared, returning early from his meal with his Mother, which wasn’t a good sign. Toby went to his room, to strip out of his school clothes, Brian stuck his head around the door, "So, how was your Mum?"

"OK, I suppose. I asked her."

"About the holiday?"

"Yeah."

"And?"

Toby finally turned towards his Father, "She's going away, it's not completely settled. She was going to tell me when they'd got it fixed. Jasper's getting a job down South and she's going with him. It’s an experiment", Toby pulled a face as he said the word, "and she'll let me know when things are settled."

"Well, at least we know."

"Do you think she’ll come back?"

Brian gave Toby a hug, the boy looked anxious, "I think she hopes to settle down somewhere else, away from here."

"With him?"

"Almost certainly. Thing is, when folk do a flit, they take themselves with them. My Gran used to say that, and it’s true. Your Mum’s always been a bit restless, and I reckon Jasper is as well. So, who knows?"

"But she might come back?"

"Look. Don’t get your hopes up. But if she lets us know where she is we can visit."

"We can?"

"Yeah, you, me and Gordon. You can meet your Mum, just like you do now, without Jasper being around whilst Gordon and I bugger off somewhere. No sweat. We won’t lose touch, don’t you worry, we won’t let her. And you can email her stuff".

Toby pulled a face, "She never answers."

"She’s just down the road, knows she’ll see you in a few days. It’ll be different when she’s away. And besides…"

"Not everyone’s like you and empties their inbox."

Brian laughed and ruffled Toby’s hair. "We’ll make it work, sport. Living here with us and seeing your Mum."

Inside himself, Brian wasn’t entirely sure. Deirdre might reappear like a bad penny, expecting to simply pick up things where she’d left off, as if Toby was a parcel. Or she might simply drop off the face of the earth. Neither route was ideal for Toby and Brian wanted to do his damnedest to find a middle ground, if at all possible.

But there was something else, Brian stared at his son, “You OK, was there anything else?”

“I said about Jasper. About writing down all the stuff he’d said to me. She asked if it was your idea and I said no, that you’d not seen it, it was private.”

“How did she take that?”

“She was quiet. Didn’t kick up a fuss or anything. You think it’s OK?”

“I don’t know, sport. We’re going to play it by ear, but believe you me, we’re not just sending you off for a week on your own to put up with Jasper. Right. I think we’d best leave the issue, for now. And see how it develops with your Mum.” Toby nodded.

Whilst the two men were eating, and Toby stole food from his Father’s plate, they had decided to address the holiday question, dead on.

"Any idea when your Mum is going, sport? She said anything."

Toby tensed up. "She's didn’t say, it’s not settled, I think. Why?"

"Don't worry, I'm not planning anything you won't like. It's just that Gordon and I need to sort holiday out at work."

"And you don't want Mum messing things up."

"Yep. Look. I'll give her a ring, now. You have a think. Two weeks holiday somewhere with Gordon and I, plus a month where you'll be shifting between Gran's, Drew and Evie's and work, with maybe time with Justin." He stared at the boy, "And no, you're not being left on your own. Or Gordon and I take two weeks each, separately so for a month or so you’d have one of us around. We could go out for days."

Toby nodded, OK. He'd have a think.

Brian went out onto the balcony to phone Deirdre out of the way. Past conversations had tended to wind him up. This one proved straightforward, relatively speaking. She'd been decidedly sharp at first. His Mother said that Deirdre was only sweet when she wanted something, and that was true here. She was full of the plans to travel. It all sounded alarmingly unfocused, there was the possibility of a job for Jasper, and they were going to go down for an extended period and see what happened.

She’d stay in contact, and would no doubt be coming back to town to visit friends and see Toby. There was, thankfully, no mention of Toby visiting her and Jasper. Had she got the message? The conversation was taut, full of things left unsaid, and Brian left it like that. It was cowardly, he knew, but falling out with Deirdre just before she left for an extended period didn’t seem good.

Poor Toby. Not only did his Mother regard looking after the boy as having him foisted on her, but he'd not see her for a long time, with no suggestion of an extended meeting before then. Toby and Gordon were watching television, but Toby looked tense; he'd been constantly looking through the door to the balcony where Brian was.

"Right sport. Your Mum and Jasper are off over the Summer, so no, she won't be taking you away. We're on our own." Toby's OK said it all, and the boy was quiet for the rest of the evening.

But next morning, his bounce was coming back, and he'd decided. He'd like a holiday, a proper one, and live with spending the rest of the time being shuttled about. The question now, was where the hell to go.

---

Thursday, Brian decided to bite the bullet. Toby was having his tea at his Gran's, and they'd collect him later. Gordon was sitting on the balcony with his laptop, catching up on some of the never-ending stream of admin their job threw up.

Brian was in the kitchen with a bag of wholemeal flour and a recipe for Banana Bread. So far, he'd cooked with regular flour, that's what his Mum used. Toby had refrained from comment, partly because he enjoyed his Dad's cakes, even when they didn't work properly. And partly because Toby understood that his Dad and Gordon were making an effort.

Justin's Mum didn't really bake, so there was no help there, and Brian's Mum certainly would not countenance wholemeal flour, pronouncing it unsuitable for baking. Brian laid out the ingredients, made sure the oven was to temperature and set to.

---

"What's that smell, Dad?"

The kitchen was filled with the warm smell of baking overlaid with more bitter tones. Gordon ruffled the boy's hair; he had gone to fetch him whilst Brian had cleaned the kitchen. "Your Dad has been baking, a new recipe."

"Oh!"

"Now, now, sport. At least sound enthusiastic."

In fact, the Banana Bread didn't half look bad. It had burned on the top, hence the smell, but that had been easily scraped off and a quick call to his Mum had produced the suggestion of covering it with grease-proof part of the way through. Next time.

"So, are you too stuffed from your Gran's, or do you want to try some?"

Toby's eyes lit up, "A little bit to try, Dad." It wasn't half bad, and they agreed it was definitely worth another go.

Gordon’s phone rang, he looked at it and said that it was his Mum, so he went onto the balcony.

"That was Mum", Gordon said unnecessarily when he returned to the kitchen.

"Something wrong?" Brian was slightly worried, as communications with Evie were usually text messages or emails.

"Not really", Gordon sighed. "You remember me talking about Ralph? The guy I got together with at school."

"Where the school complained, and he went back into the closet?"

"Yeah. Well, I've never really kept up with any of my school mates."

"Back in Bedston?"

"Mmm. Ralph and his family lived in a fancy house in the posh bit, but I think they moved, and he went off to Uni. Usual. Anyway, Mum and Dad were at Private View in Bedston for an old mate of Dad's. No connection with us living there, the bloke teaches at the art college. Like me, Mum and Dad didn't really keep up with people in Bedston, all their friends were from art college.!

"But..." Brian was getting a bit restless, wishing Gordon could get to the point.

"They got chatting at the PV, to a couple it turned out Mum and Dad knew from way back and, well", Gordon gave a rather expressive shrug, "Ralph's name came up. This couple are still in contact with Ralph's parents. He's evidently divorced, with lovely twin girls", Gordon rolled his eyes, "and moved to Parborough to be near the kids' mother. Done OK for himself, too. Has a firm that builds websites or something. Of course, all the information is second or third hand, but..."

"Ralph might be living round the corner. Does he know that you're here?"

"Thankfully, Mum and Dad kept quiet about that. They guessed that I'd not be keen on him being in contact. But..." Gordon twitched.

"His girls are what?"

Gordon pulled a face, "Eight, may be nine."

"So, not likely to be in the same school as Toby. We won't bump into him at Parents Evenings, and we move in different circles. The chances of you meeting him are minimal. And besides..."

"I know, I just say hi and leave."

"Precisely. That is if you recognise him."

"Why shouldn't I?"

"It's 15, 16 years ago, he's a straight bloke now, probably lost his hair and got a blobby Dad bod."

Gordon laughed, "I suppose."

"And if it is 15 or 16 years, what's the problem? I know that it felt shitty, but you both dealt with the situation in different ways."

"I think I feel a bit guilty over the way it all happened, and that I ignored him."

"Because he said he was straight and got a girlfriend, after spending months balling you?"

"Something like that."

Brian grinned, "Think it’s about time you grew up on this one. What's the worst that can happen?"

Gordon smiled and shrugged, "We say an embarrassed hello and bugger off."

"Precisely."