Porcupines - 18. Chapter 18 - The Ghost

Chapter 18 - The Ghost

“Mommy, Unk’s here,” Brandon called and ran headlong as fast as he could into Chuck’s arms.

“How’s my buddy doing?” Chuck said to his little nephew. Brandon was chattering a mile a minute when Chuck’s sister turned the corner out of the kitchen.

“I had to see it to believe it,” Kelli kidded. “I’d given you up for a ghost bro.”

“You’re a laugh-riot sis,” Chuck said and tousled Brandon’s hair as he stood up. “What’ve you been up to?” he asked.

“Just sitting around wondering if the earth opened up and swallowed my brother,” Kelli teased.

“I’ve been working a lot and hanging out with Dylan.”

“Where’s Dillwin?” Brandon said tugging on Chuck’s pants. “I like Dillwin. Can he come over and read me a book again?”

“I’m sure he’d love to but not tonight. We’re having his brother and niece over for dinner.”

Kelli laughed, “We’re, did you say ‘we’re’ having his family over? Do I need to find another roommate?”

“Okay,” Chuck conceded. “Dylan’s having his brother over to meet me and I’m cooking. That’s why I said ‘we.’ It’s too soon to talk about moving in together. We’re trying to make this go slow.”

“Go slow!” Kelli chuckled. “Last week you both declared your undying love to each other right here in this very apartment. Please.” But Chuck could see she was very happy for him. He was very happy for him. It almost felt too good to be true.

“I just need a couple of things from the kitchen and some clothes and I’ll be out of your hair,” Chuck said heading to his bedroom. “You know Brandon misses you terribly,” Kelli said.

“I’ll stay here tomorrow night. I have to work in the morning and Dylan doesn’t work until the night so I can spend the whole evening with you guys,” Chuck said.

“That’ll be nice,” Kelli said. “I’m just picking on you. Dylan’s a nice guy.”

“I know. I’m so lucky.”

Chuck quickly got some clothes in a bag and the kitchen implements he needed and kissed his sister goodbye. Brandon got some sugar too and then Chuck was off to Dylan’s.

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“You don’t have to make such an elaborate meal,” Dylan said watching Chuck stuff chicken breasts with a wild rice and mushroom filling. There were individual crocks of shrimp and red pepper mac and cheese in the oven and marinating green beans on the counter. Chuck also had made some prosciutto wrapped stuffed figs to put under the broiler for a hot appetizer along with some homemade cheese crackers. “He’s just my brother. You don’t need to impress him.”

“I do need to impress him because I don’t want him to think you got the boobie prize,” Chuck grinned and continued tying up the chicken. “Besides, you know I love doing this.”

“Why don’t you work as a cook?” Dylan asked. “Why are you a security guard when you can make these amazing meals?”

“I’m not good enough to do that,” Chuck laughed. “Maybe if I could go to cooking school and learn how to really build recipes and menus I could get a job as a cook.”

Dylan watched his boyfriend and thought. Chuck was better than half the cooks at Nora’s. He should be doing what he loved, not walking around looking for security breaches. That was a waste of his talent.

Kelly and Susie showed up promptly at six thirty. Dylan proudly introduced Chuck to his brother and niece. Susie was chatting Chuck up immediately as she always did. She asked what he did for a living and how old he was and what his favorite animal was. Dylan was surprised when Chuck said he loved cats.

“Uncle Dylan likes cats too. Do you have a cat?” Susie asked.

“No, my nephew is allergic,” Chuck answered. “He’s four years old. How old are you?”

“I’m four too. Isn’t that interesting,” Susie said. “You should get Uncle Dylan a cat. Then you could play with it when you visit. I had a cat once but it got run over by a truck and was flat. It was icky.”

Chuck smiled and listened to Susie’s chatter. It was so like Brandon after he got comfortable with other people. Chuck excused himself and went to get the appetizers. Dylan got his brother a drink and they sat on the couch and caught up. Chuck put the stuffed figs, cheese crackers and marinated olives on the coffee table to nibble on. Kelly and Dylan dove in.

“Gawd,” Kelly raved. “These are delicious. Where did you get them?”

“Chuck made them. He made our entire dinner from scratch. He’s the best chef I’ve ever met,” Dylan bragged. Susie tried a fig and made a face. She did like the cheese crackers and ate about half of them. “These are really yummy,” she said to her dad.

Kelly asked Chuck a few questions but mostly Dylan answered for him. He’d never seen his brother so animated yet content at the same time. It was like “BR” Before Ron. Kelly finally turned to his brother, “I’m sure he can answer on his own Dylan.” Dylan blushed and sat back.

Chuck and Kelly talked for a bit with Susie interjecting every once and a while. After half an hour, Chuck got up to finish dinner. Dylan was going to help, but Kelly held him back.

“This guy seems really great but he’s different than the other men you’ve introduced me to,” Kelly said. He was shocked at how comfortable Dylan was acting and how he bragged on Chuck. Chuck was pretty down to earth and normal. Sometimes, Kelly was a bit repulsed by the men Dylan would introduce them to. There was one other oddity as well; Dylan had never had them over for dinner to meet a “friend.” They either met at a restaurant or he brought them over to Kelly’s. This was a first and damn the guy could cook too, if his appetizers were any indication.

“You got it bad this time don’t you bro?” Kelly said quietly to Dylan.

“He’s a really good guy, huh?” Dylan said. “He makes me feel so relaxed. I’ve never had that before. Well, except for Ron of course.”

Kelly thought about what Dylan said but didn’t comment. He didn’t want to get into THAT tonight. Regardless, Dylan was just chatting away, obviously really happy, and not racing around manically making everyone uncomfortable. It was a joy to see Dylan acting just like a regular guy. Well, a regular guy in love.

“I think Chuck seems to be really good for you,” Kelly said.

Susie who was playing with her doll and not looking up said, “I like him better than all your other boyfriends Uncle Dylan. He makes you look happy. Plus, he makes good crackers,” Dylan looked over toward the kitchen. Chuck was standing holding fresh drinks for Dylan and Kelly. His mouth hung open. Without saying a word, he turned and went back to the kitchen.

“Oh no. Susie, that wasn’t a nice thing to say,” Kelly said quickly. His daughter was so precocious but sometimes that meant saying things that could cut to the quick.

“Why Daddy? I said I liked Chuck better than those other guys. That’s a compliment,” Susie said still trying different outfits on her doll.

Dylan was up and rushed back to the kitchen. When he got there he could see Chuck was pretty upset and trying very hard to hide it. “Chuck. She didn’t mean it the way it sounded.”

“Dylan,” Chuck looked up and had tears in his eyes. “We’re not virgins. We have pasts and apparently all of them in yours have met your family.”

“Please, Chuck, don’t take this personally,” Dylan felt a stab of fear rising within him. “I love you. You’re special to me. Don’t hold my past against me,” Dylan started sobbing quietly. Chuck was tossing the beans in the pan. Over the sizzle, he heard Dylan’s distress. It hit him like a bucket of ice water. He couldn’t stay mad at the guy.

“Oh Dylan,” Chuck gasped. “It’s okay. We’re okay. I was just so shocked.” Chuck took Dylan in his arms. “Please stop crying. I love you. It’s okay.”

Dylan’s weeping ebbed as the import of his boyfriend’s words soaked in. “I can’t change the past.”

“I know Dylan,” Chuck said. “We’re good. Are you okay?”

“You scared me. I couldn’t stand the idea I’d hurt you,” Dylan choked back a sob.

“Don’t worry. I’m fine. I’m sorry I got so sensitive. Please take the drinks out and tell your brother I’m fine.” Chuck looked at Dylan and nodded. “I love you.”

Dylan wiped his eyes and grabbed the drinks. “Ready for another round bro?” he said as he exited the kitchen.

***********************************

“Chuck, this is the best meal I’ve had in years,” Kelly raved. “That chicken melted in my mouth and those beans were awesome. What did you do to them?”

“I marinated them first and then quick sautéed them,” Chuck said grinning. The earlier embarrassment had passed and the meal had been consumed and enjoyed thoroughly. Even Susie, the four year old, had eaten heartily and told Chuck he was the best cook ever.

“Why don’t you go to cooking school?” Kelly said. “There are a few good ones in the Cities. You really should think about it seriously. It’s obvious you love doing it.”

“Thanks for the compliment Kelly but I’m not that good. Besides, I just wouldn’t have the money to go there. It’s almost 15 grand a year,” Chuck said but enjoyed rolling the idea around in his head.

“I’ve been telling him that since he made that wonderful breakfast after our first date. He’s already a fantastic cook,” Dylan said. “I’m the luckiest guy in the Cities.”

“Well, whenever Chuck wants us over to eat, count me in,” Kelly said patting his full belly.

“Me too,” Susie piped up. “Chuck you are the best friend Uncle Dylan’s ever had.”

Chuck smiled and got up to get coffee for the adults and chocolate milk for Susie. “Let’s go into the living room. I’m so stuffed I need to get horizontal,” Kelly said and burped politely.

Chuck brought out the drinks and handed them out. Kelly took the coffee and said, “After a meal like that, we need cognac. Dylan, do you still have that bottle I gave you for Christmas or is it gone already?”

“I haven’t even opened it. Let me get you a snifter. Chuck, you too?”

“Sure,” Chuck said. It had been a good meal and good company though he was still a little hurt. He could use some booze.

“Chuck,” Kelly whispered. Chuck leaned toward Dylan’s brother. “Just so you understand. After Ron died, Dylan went kind of “man mad” for a while. He didn’t handle his death well and seemed to date a lot of men. But, I want you to know, he’s actually happy now. I want to thank you for helping me get my brother back.”

Chuck smiled. It was nice Dylan’s brother was trying to make him feel better. He had thought that might be the situation but it still pained him. He’d thought of this dinner as something special and it seemed Dylan had done this many times. Still, his brother obviously liked him enough to say such things.

Kelly glanced nervously at the kitchen. He felt terrible about what his daughter had said. It had obviously hit a sore spot with Chuck. He leaned over gesturing Chuck closer.

“Just so you know, Dylan’s changed.”

“What do you mean?” Chuck whispered back. This was making him uncomfortable again.

“Dylan’s never had us over to his apartment for a meal. You are the first guy he’s felt so relaxed with he felt he could invite us into his home. Those other guys never fit like you do. We’d always just go out to eat or they’d come over to our place. He seems to be more comfortable in his own skin with you.”

Chuck just looked at Kelly and saw the pleading emotion, the care Dylan’s brother was emanating. Maybe Dylan had dated a lot more than he had. Perhaps Dylan had introduced a lot of men to his family. But, Kelly seemed to believe Dylan felt differently about him. Chuck nodded and sat back in the overstuffed chair.

“I really like Dylan a lot,” Chuck said, smiling again. “And he has a very nice family.

“Dylan loves you,” Susie said without looking up from her dolls. “He told me. He said it was a secret but I think you love him too.”

Chuck couldn’t help himself. Susie’s statement made him feel so good. “I do love him, but don’t tell him either. It’s a secret too.” Susie laughed and hugged herself. Dylan returned with three snifters of cognac and all three of them were laughing.

“What’s so funny?” he said handing out the drinks.

“Can’t tell you,” Kelly said. “It’s a secret. Right Susie?” Susie giggled even harder.

********************************

After Kelly and Susie left for the night, Dylan sat next to Chuck and put his head on his boyfriend’s shoulder. “I wish I’d never brought another man home to meet my brother. When I found you in the kitchen so hurt, I wished the other men had never existed. It pained me to see you so down.”

“It’s not that you had other boyfriends. It’s the idea so many men have liked you. You’re so handsome and smart and a great guy. Anybody would be crazy to not fall for you. I’m just scared I’m not good enough for you,” Chuck said and by the end his voice was getting raspy.

“Stop that right now,” Dylan said, sounding pissed. “You are the most adorable, nicest, and sexiest man I’ve ever met. I’m the lucky one.”

“That’s nice of you to say,” Chuck said sounding down. “But, I’m just an ordinary guy in love with the hottest man in the Cities.”

“Chuck. Look at me. I love you because of how you make me feel. I love you because you can make my toes curl with your voice. I love you because when you smile it makes me smile. You do believe me don’t you?” Dylan said holding Chuck’s face in his hands. “Please, believe me.”

Chuck felt his heart begin to swell with pride. Dylan’s love reached out and filled him. He didn’t feel too badly any more. He could tell Dylan was being sincere and really did love him. Maybe Chuck was just a regular guy who wasn’t very special but something in him made Dylan happy. That was all that mattered right now. That was enough.

The two went to bed and Chuck slowly made love to Dylan. Dylan cried out in ecstasy. Chuck did make his toes curl and his head erupt. Afterwards, they lay together and talked quietly. Chuck talked about the local community college cooking school. Dylan talked about starting grad school in January. They could both go at the same time and work nights. Dylan suggested to Chuck that move in with him. Chuck wanted to wait until after Christmas. They were planning a life together and neither of them really noticed.

Later, Dylan fell asleep in Chuck’s arms and Chuck just watched him. Chuck thought about how beautiful his man was. He was so lucky Dylan thought he was special. What does he see in me? Chuck thought. I should just be happy he loves me and he knew that was true. He just couldn’t fathom why.

Dylan’s face was no longer lax with sleep. His cheeks were bunched. His nose was scrunched. He was breathing harder. Chuck figured Dylan was dreaming. Sometimes he woke up screaming. Sometimes Dylan called out for Ron. Chuck would hold him and cradle his head. That seemed to calm him. Dylan couldn’t seem to get past Ron. But, Chuck could settle him down and make him feel better.

Dylan’s eyelids were fluttering. This was going to be a bad one. He could hear Dylan’s throat sounds. This wasn’t good. Chuck thought Ron visited Dylan in his dreams. Why couldn’t Dylan get past that man? Before Dylan started trembling and screaming, Chuck hugged him closer and whispered to him.

“I’m here for you. It’s okay Dylan. I love you. I’m here,” Chuck said quietly. Dylan settled down. He’d worked some magic on him. He wished Ron would leave Dylan alone. If only he could be as good as Ron had been. How do you compete with a ghost?

You can’t. You just can’t.