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Tanka

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MichaelS36

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Oh, writing Tanka, following AC's new Guide..  Here they are good or bad. 

 

Walking through the snow
it squeaks under my black boots;
I tighten my coat
however when I reach you
there's no coolness in your arms


Snow tops the feeder
before I add fresh birdseed;
the brave nuthatch waits
unconcerned about my size;
sure of his heroic heart

 

 

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7 minutes ago, MacGreg said:

These are excellent, Mike! In the first, the crunch of snow beneath your boots seems to demonstrate the journey, while the warmth you receive at the end represents the reward. In the second, your description of the nuthatch is like a metaphor for the human species sometimes false sense of courage but strong determination. Very nicely done, my friend, on each of these.

Thanks very much, Mac. I appreciate you reading them, and your insight. 

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3 hours ago, Reader1810 said:

 

:gikkle:

 

I can just see them all staring up at you with one thought - “yeah, so?”

 

They can run up and down trees and walls.. and yeah when they stop and stand there looking at you, that's exactly what they are saying!

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These are excellent Tankas, Mike. You paint a beautiful tapestry with these.

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I like both, but especially the second.  It inspires me to get a bird feeder, as there is always a flock of them hanging around in the blackberry thicket in winter.

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