poetry Poetry Prompt 1 - !TANKA!

[Irritable1]

INTRODUCTION

 

During my brief time here at GA, I’ve noticed that a number of authors have ventured into writing poetry pieces, which have often been very powerful in terms of emotion and rhythm.  However, I haven’t seen much variation in set form.  In an earlier life, I took some poetry classes.  I enjoyed the chance to play with some of the techniques and structures that are available to poets as frameworks for the thoughts and emotions they wish to express: internal rhyme, broken meter, pantoums, sestinas, sonnets, and so on.  Sometimes the experience was horribly frustrating, other times it was inspiring, sometimes it focused my thoughts, other times it kept pulling out new ideas… but it was always a mental workout and I usually felt afterward as if I were in better control of both my prose and my poetry.  Sometimes I even got a decent poem out of the deal.

 

I was talking with AC Benus about this in June, and we agreed that as we are both form nerds, we would love to co-chair a set of prompts based on poetry forms.  Renee has kindly given her consent for us to use this forum.  Every once in a while we’ll toss out a poetry form that one of us knows and likes, sometimes with a required subject, sometimes without.  As forbidding as some of the structures can seem, they don’t have to be.  We’ll treat it like putting a toy on a table, and we hope that other authors and editors at GA will feel like picking up each form and playing with it a bit… and maybe even publishing a poem based on that structure.

 

So that’s from me, and here is the v. erudite AC Benus to write the very first poetry prompt.  AC, take it away…..

 

***

 

Poetry Prompt  1 – Tanka

 

Let's Write a Tanka!

 

A what..? I know, I can hear you asking what a Tanka is. When Irri first suggested combining forces to create poetry prompts with the idea of promoting verse in set form (that is, not 'free-form'), she floated the idea of Haiku. I too thought as much, but I knew that there could be no real understanding of Haiku without first seeing what that shortened form originated from.

 

Tanka, which is also known as Waka (or Japanese verse), is very ancient. Fujiwara Sadaie edited an anthology in 1235 in which he collected verses and presented them sequentially. The first one dates to approximately the year 660, and the last from the year the anthology was collected. Hyakunin Isshu, or The Issue of a Hundred People, provides one Tanka each from one hundred poets. In the 20^th century particularly, many fine Japanese poets have seen the potential in the Tanka's open form, and revived it richly to modern tastes.     

 

So specifically, Tanka consists of five lines, which are arranged in the following syllables: 5–7–5–7–7. This is like a Haiku, but there are two extra lines at the end, and this makes all the difference. Tanka are emotional poems, where the observer is present and speaking to us directly. In Haiku, the observer (and his or her emotions) is suppressed; a good Haiku is supposed to be untouched by human hands, while the Tanka is all about connection from heart to heart.

 

Let's look at an example. Here is a translation of No. 3 by Kakinomoto no Hitomaro from the Hyakunin Isshu:

 

Still on a mountain,

A mountain bird's tail stays still,

But it all seems like

A long, long life is adrift

For one who yet finds no rest.      

 

This poem puts you there, with Kakinomoto as he watches a pheasant slowly move. There is an impromptu feeling to the poem, but also one of great and timeless connection to the way things will or have always been. 

 

Let's look at another one. Here is a translation of No. 70 by Riozen-hoshi:

 

In sadness complete

My roof from others is set,

As if depriving

The twilight too of the same,

We watch the autumn evening.

 

These examples are enough to show you how much 'I' is in Tanka compared to Haiku. They also show another aspect of all Japanese poetry and traditional song, and that is a seasonal reference. Both of these poems mention autumn; Riozen does so directly, and Kakinomoto achieves it by mentioning a pheasant, which is hunted in the fall. For a Japanese-style poem to be true to form, such an allusion must be included. But I wanted to show that they can be subtle and casual. For instance, summer can be brought to your Tanka in the form 'suntan lotion,' 'public pool,' '4^th of July,' 'beach blanket' – anything that puts the reader in the hot season. Likewise, for winter, 'robin' (which is associated with Christmas in Britain), 'furnace grate,' 'road salt,' 'heating bill,' 'creaking roof,' 'tire chains,' and on and on and on can serve to put the reader where you are in the time of year. I hope you get the idea and are inspired; anything that says season to you is fair game for a Japanese-style poem.

 

Now, the challenge: write your own Tanka and set it in the season of year wherever in the world you are right now. The Tanka should use a seasonal allusion that has a powerful effect on you specifically. Although you think the allusion may not be meaningful to anyone else, poetry is meant to touch by random connections, so do not be afraid.

 

As final inspiration, here's one I wrote, but can you guess the season?

 

Rain etched on the glass –

On one side of it, nature,

On the other, my finger;

While the drops fall and I try

To let one feel real to me. 

 

 

[Valkyrie]

I haven't written poetry in close to 15 years and am not brave enough to attempt writing it again, but I'm looking forward to reading what the poets on the site come up with.  Great idea!  Thanks, Irri and AC Benus!

[Former Member]

Hey, thanks Irritable1 for all of your vision, drive and hard work to get this launched. I hope we see lots of Tanka rolling in! 

[Andy78]

I don't really get poetry, and I rarely venture into it.

 

I hated reading Keats, Cowper, and the such in school.  I remember trying to read Sylvia Plath's collection Ariel - might as well have been written in Cantonese for all I got out of it.  I'm fine when it's something simple like the well known Each Peach Pear Plum (I've written a few of my own versions of this over the years) but not really anything beyond that.

 

Though I wish all of our members a lot of fun writing these prompts.

 

This is a great idea Irri and AC, and I'm sure will be a welcomed addition to the site.

[Ron]

I gave it a try. For your inspection and derision enjoyment . . .

 

Tanka No. 1

[Former Member]

I gave it a try. For your inspection and derision enjoyment . . .

 

Tanka No. 1

Awesome! The ice is broken, and it sounds like the heat of your poem needs some ice right about now. Love it.

Edited September 3, 2014 by AC Benus

[Irritable1]

Thanks Ron!

 

Here's mine.  Bit pedestrian, but I got to swashbuckle a bit with "anxiety" and I do love getting to play with two extra 7-syllable lines.

[Ron]

Thanks Ron!

 

Here's mine.  Bit pedestrian, but I got to swashbuckle a bit with "anxiety" and I do love getting to play with two extra 7-syllable lines.

A bit pedestrian? Ha! If you can say that about yours, then I'm pretty sure mine could be described as a bit banausic.

 

edit to add: pun intended 

Edited September 4, 2014 by Ron

[Former Member]

Also guys, don't forget - this is not a Haiku! The 'I' is essential in Tanka, as it is what reaches out to touch other readers.  

[Irritable1]

A bit pedestrian? Ha! If you can say that about yours, then I'm pretty sure mine could be described as a bit banausic.

 

edit to add: pun intended 

 

  It... it hurts my head when you do that, Ron...

 

Also guys, don't forget - this is not a Haiku! The 'I' is essential in Tanka, as it is what reaches out to touch other readers.

 

Darn it. Fine, I'll try again.

[Toast]

Okay, I tried one

No idea what "I" is

 

 

https://www.gayauthors.org/story/foster/poetryprompts/1

Edited September 4, 2014 by Foster

[Irritable1]

My understanding is that the "I" is the poet's self.  Emotion. And that the tanka should include more self-revelation than the haiku. I like yours, Foster.

 

I took another shot at the "I" here.

[Former Member]

 

Okay, I tried one

No idea what "I" is

 

 

https://www.gayauthors.org/story/foster/poetryprompts/1

 

Yes, as Irri said, the "I" is the poet, the one who is there to witness the event that inspired the poem.   

Edited September 4, 2014 by AC Benus

[Irritable1]

<Freud voice> Ze Ego. </Freud voice>

[Former Member]

My understanding is that the "I" is the poet's self.  Emotion. And that the tanka should include more self-revelation than the haiku. I like yours, Foster.

 

I took another shot at the "I" here.

Irri, your 'rain' poem hit me right in the kisser, so to speak, lol. It's because we are in the same climate and environment - needless to say, i know exactly what you are expressing by saying you are waiting for the rain to return. In this part of the world it rains from about mid-November to sometime in May, and then we have a long dry and usually hot spell. Right about now i'm longing for that rain to start falling too. The good thing about the moisture starting before Thanksgiving is, we have roses by Christmas; I love that. Hey, there's an idea for a Tanka if i ever heard one!  

[Irritable1]

Hey, it's dahlia season now. Get on it!

[Former Member]

Hey, it's dahlia season now. Get on it!

...only one in the garden this year...another Tanka

[Aditus]

I had to do this.

[Jaro_423]

This is a great idea. Thanks for the inspiration. Will get to work and hopefully produce something to share soon.

[Jaro_423]

Herewith my pedantic efforts. At least I had a bit of fun doing it.

https://www.gayauthors.org/forums/story/jaro-423/poetryprompt1-tanka

[Rano]

Kief! [cool]. I wanna play with. I've already shared with some friends here at GA, that I don't regard myself as a poet at all, but I love playing with words and "arrange words into form," if that makes sense  So, I'm going to give it a try...heh heh oh my nerves! just don't rush me 

Edited September 4, 2014 by Rano

[nostic]

Thank you so much for the great idea. I know mine's funny, hope it's not too bad  

[Rano]

I don't know how to create a link as some of you have done, but here's my attempt at arranging some words:

 

 

I see blossoms bud,

 

heralding the Maiden fair.

 

Snow forms rivulets,

 

skylarks singing joyously...

 

The Old Man has gone to sleep.

Edited September 4, 2014 by Rano

[Dolores Esteban]

Great idea!

 

I gave it a try.

 

https://www.gayauthors.org/story/dolores-esteban/gawritingprompts/50

[Former Member]

I had to do this.

I like it, but think of it this way, where is the poet in this..? I mean, what is the poet feeling - not just what is he seeing.

This is a great idea. Thanks for the inspiration. Will get to work and hopefully produce something to share soon.

And, i see you did!