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Let The Music Play Ch 18: Shadow Rising


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  • Site Administrator
Posted
Okay, a serious question. I've never tired to follow this many characters in one of my stories before, and the cast is far more crowded than I'm used to. Are y'all having trouble keeping track of who is who? I'm trying to keep things clear, and have distinctive names, but I know I often have trouble keeping the characters straight (Well, you know what I mean) in my head when I'm reading a story with a large cast. Am I doing okay on this? Any suggestions?

Thanks!!

CJ

You're doing fine. The main players all have distinct personalities. Barbra and Jon are probably the weakest -- Barbra because she doesn't have a lot of air time, and Jon... I don't know. He's there, but he's not central enough to get a good feel for his character. It is distinct from the rest, though -- just a bit more opaque. Gunter is another one who could probably do with more play so we can see his personality more -- but as the security guy, strong and silent works really well. It would be interesting to know what he thinks of Chase and Brandon, but he's professional enough we may never get to see it.

 

As for the minor players, Steve and Wilde are developing nicely. Zeke is, again, more of a background character, but he's still standing as a unique character.

 

In the second thread, all three major characters are well developed. :)

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Posted

I have no problem at all! I find it perfect. I remember each character and its name because of some events or the way your protrayed them. I still haven't forgot Charity. That gurl made an impression on me! :D

 

Ieshwar

Posted
Okay, a serious question. I've never tired to follow this many characters in one of my stories before, and the cast is far more crowded than I'm used to. Are y'all having trouble keeping track of who is who? I'm trying to keep things clear, and have distinctive names, but I know I often have trouble keeping the characters straight (Well, you know what I mean) in my head when I'm reading a story with a large cast. Am I doing okay on this? Any suggestions?

Thanks!!

CJ

 

I don't think I have any real, major, problem with keeping track of all the characters. They're all in their own setting, there's Helen (and barbra) on their own, The boys of Instinct, and those around dimitri.

 

Altho, I wouldn't be able to tell you who were the 2 other girls with Charity (tho I do remember they were two others :P ), and the same goes with some others.

 

Now that Graeme said it, I do agree with him (I find that I use those 5 words often btw), In a strange way Jon is the one major character that might be the weakest. He often lay low; when Chase has problem with his brother it's always 'cause of Eric's doing. Like Graeme said he haven't really had a big air time and therefore we don't know as much how he is.

 

About the guys from The Shadow, without saying that mixing them up cause a big problem for me, I'd say it's still too early for me to define them clearly. But, I think it's perfectly normal as we still are getting to know them.

 

sacha

  • Site Administrator
Posted
Now that Graeme said it, I do agree with him (I find that I use those 5 words often btw), ...

I need to do something about that... :P

Posted
I need to do something about that... :P

 

 

B) ....Yeah! Why don't you step outside and have a fag over it :whistle:

  • Site Moderator
Posted

The only time I have a problem keeping characters straight is when I'm reading stories with similar storylines.

 

Jan

Posted

Great chapter, as usual. I love your characters. It's still a little hard to keep track of the names of the characters in the Australian subplot. I think that will get better for me as the story continues. It's great the way you made your engineer long winded and geeky. (I've met a few like that.)

 

I think the shadows have some kind of enbarasing sectret that could be uncovered if someone started poking around. I'm thinking something along the lines of a drunken encounter with a guy maybe in an airport bathroom. Well, maybe not the bathroom part.

 

The birthday gift was great. Hmmm, what could we get a young rock musician? I know! A book about decorating. I'm sure he will love that!

Posted

I find Jon rather cool and has his personality of his own. Not weakly developped, according to me.

 

Just my opinions

 

Ieshwar

Posted
You're doing fine. The main players all have distinct personalities. Barbra and Jon are probably the weakest -- Barbra because she doesn't have a lot of air time, and Jon... I don't know. He's there, but he's not central enough to get a good feel for his character. It is distinct from the rest, though -- just a bit more opaque. Gunter is another one who could probably do with more play so we can see his personality more -- but as the security guy, strong and silent works really well. It would be interesting to know what he thinks of Chase and Brandon, but he's professional enough we may never get to see it.

 

As for the minor players, Steve and Wilde are developing nicely. Zeke is, again, more of a background character, but he's still standing as a unique character.

 

In the second thread, all three major characters are well developed. :)

 

Thanks Graeme! Jon will be developed a bit more. He's tricky to write, becuase of the Instinct members he's the least outgoing in some ways, and he also doesn't have as much screen time.

 

One problem I've had is allotting "screen time" in scenes with many characters. That's trickier than I thought it would be. :)

 

I have no problem at all! I find it perfect. I remember each character and its name because of some events or the way your protrayed them. I still haven't forgot Charity. That gurl made an impression on me! :D

 

Ieshwar

 

Thanks Ieshwar!

There are minor characters from time to time, like Gabe who played a role in the beginning. Some recur, some don't. And Charity made an impression on me, too. :)

 

I don't think I have any real, major, problem with keeping track of all the characters. They're all in their own setting, there's Helen (and barbra) on their own, The boys of Instinct, and those around dimitri.

 

Altho, I wouldn't be able to tell you who were the 2 other girls with Charity (tho I do remember they were two others :P ), and the same goes with some others.

 

Now that Graeme said it, I do agree with him (I find that I use those 5 words often btw), In a strange way Jon is the one major character that might be the weakest. He often lay low; when Chase has problem with his brother it's always 'cause of Eric's doing. Like Graeme said he haven't really had a big air time and therefore we don't know as much how he is.

 

About the guys from The Shadow, without saying that mixing them up cause a big problem for me, I'd say it's still too early for me to define them clearly. But, I think it's perfectly normal as we still are getting to know them.

 

sacha

 

Thanks Sacha!

To be honest, without going back and looking, I can't remember if the two girls with Charity were even given names. LoL. For a non-recurring character, I try and avoid naming them if I can.

 

Good point on Jon. He'll get some more development later on. :)

 

The only time I have a problem keeping characters straight is when I'm reading stories with similar storylines.

 

Jan

 

I do that too. If I'm reading it as a periodic serial I have an even larger problem; I don't have a very good memory for names, which doesn't help. :)

 

Great chapter, as usual. I love your characters. It's still a little hard to keep track of the names of the characters in the Australian subplot. I think that will get better for me as the story continues. It's great the way you made your engineer long winded and geeky. (I've met a few like that.)

 

I think the shadows have some kind of enbarasing sectret that could be uncovered if someone started poking around. I'm thinking something along the lines of a drunken encounter with a guy maybe in an airport bathroom. Well, maybe not the bathroom part.

 

The birthday gift was great. Hmmm, what could we get a young rock musician? I know! A book about decorating. I'm sure he will love that!

 

Thanks!!

 

The Australian plot is a little confusing regarding names. The narration refers to the engineer, but the dialog usually calls him Vladimir. Then there's Dimitri, so we have two russian names, and then The Scar.

 

The engineer is very much based on many engineers I've known; some have very much that same social inteptidue. I've even heard it called "the engineer's disease" by some people.

 

The gift took me a while to think of. I wanted something that showed their lack of comprehension on the "gay issue", and was funny. :)

  • Site Administrator
Posted
The engineer is very much based on many engineers I've known; some have very much that same social inteptidue. I've even heard it called "the engineer's disease" by some people.

*cough* I'm an engineer... a software engineer, but still an engineer. *cough*

 

The only reason I'm not using this emoticon: :angry: is because I used to be as socially inept as Vladimir -- possibly worse. I have since been educated and can now be safely allowed loose in public (for short periods of time) :P

Posted

Does the fact that I intend to become a chemical engineer count? 0:)

 

In that case, you have mad engineers and would-be's on your loose! Yiha! :D

 

:P

 

Ieshwar

Posted
*cough* I'm an engineer... a software engineer, but still an engineer. *cough*

 

The only reason I'm not using this emoticon: :angry: is because I used to be as socially inept as Vladimir -- possibly worse. I have since been educated and can now be safely allowed loose in public (for short periods of time) :P

 

Why, Graeme, I'm quite sure that the way I portray the engineer, and the fact you are an engineer, is entirely coincidental. 0:)

 

Does the fact that I intend to become a chemical engineer count? 0:)

 

In that case, you have mad engineers and would-be's on your loose! Yiha! :D

 

:P

 

Ieshwar

 

ACK! Can't a poor, quiet, and shy goat get away with anything these days?

 

BTW, in writing news, my short story "Three for Jake" has been approved for the anthology, and so will be in it. :) (I won't approve/disapprove my own stuff for the anthology, due to obvious conflict of interest, so someone else (I don't know if they want to be named) is very kind and does so for me). :)

Posted
ACK! Can't a poor, quiet, and shy goat get away with anything these days?

 

BTW, in writing news, my short story "Three for Jake" has been approved for the anthology, and so will be in it. :) (I won't approve/disapprove my own stuff for the anthology, due to obvious conflict of interest, so someone else (I don't know if they want to be named) is very kind and does so for me). :)

 

Actually nope, a poor, quiet and shy goat get scrutinized on everything it does. it's the ransom of fame they say, that's what the sunglasses are for!

 

good news about the short story btw, we'll all want to read it

 

sacha

Posted

Yay. I was about to ask you if you're in. Glad that you are! :D

 

And unfortunately, you're neither poor not shy nor innocent!

 

:D

 

Ieshwar

Posted
Actually nope, a poor, quiet and shy goat get scrutinized on everything it does. it's the ransom of fame they say, that's what the sunglasses are for!

 

good news about the short story btw, we'll all want to read it

 

sacha

 

Ahh, so by the fact I'm being scrutinized, that's prima fasce evidence that I am, indeed, quiet and shy, right? :)

 

Yay. I was about to ask you if you're in. Glad that you are! :D

 

And unfortunately, you're neither poor not shy nor innocent!

 

:D

 

Ieshwar

 

ACK! Surely you can't mean me?!?!?!?! 0:)

 

Hrmm, this reminds me. I'd better go get Ch 19 formatted and ready to send in. :)

Posted
Actually nope, a poor, quiet and shy goat get scrutinized on everything it does. it's the ransom of fame they say, that's what the sunglasses are for!

 

good news about the short story btw, we'll all want to read it

 

sacha

 

I'm looking forward to your story as well!

  • Site Moderator
Posted
BTW, in writing news, my short story "Three for Jake" has been approved for the anthology, and so will be in it. :) (I won't approve/disapprove my own stuff for the anthology, due to obvious conflict of interest, so someone else (I don't know if they want to be named) is very kind and does so for me). :)

In CJ's defense, when it comes to WST matters, it is a team decision on issues. If by chance there is a tie on something and we can't settle it, then it goes to someone not directly involved with the team to settle it.

 

When it comes to the Readers Choice Awards, it's looking like I maybe stepping up to manage it as the Deputy Lead and not CJ.

 

Jan

Posted
Ahh, so by the fact I'm being scrutinized, that's prima fasce evidence that I am, indeed, quiet and shy, right? :)

 

Hrmm, this reminds me. I'd better go get Ch 19 formatted and ready to send in. :)

 

In fact it only shows that you're outspoken enough to be talked about.

 

You see, I don't know,,, Lindsey lohan (for instance), her every move is being scrutinized, well I don't think we can call her quiet and shy :P

 

sacha

  • Site Administrator
Posted
You see, I don't know,,, Lindsey lohan (for instance), her every move is being scrutinized, well I don't think we can call her quiet and shy :P

A very good point! So who would be the best analogue for CJ? Britney Spears? Paris Hilton? Tom Cruise? Justin Timberlake? Any senior politician?

Posted
A very good point! So who would be the best analogue for CJ? Britney Spears? Paris Hilton? Tom Cruise? Justin Timberlake? Any senior politician?

 

I'd have to say any senior politician, because as any good politician, CJ is good to avoid answering the real question, also, just like any good one he manage to hide well his hidden agenda.

 

Finally, exactly like any politician, he's needed and we can't live without his work

Posted
In fact it only shows that you're outspoken enough to be talked about.

 

You see, I don't know,,, Lindsey lohan (for instance), her every move is being scrutinized, well I don't think we can call her quiet and shy :P

 

sacha

 

Outspoken? Me? But, that would be a bit out of character for my quiet and shy self? :ph34r:

 

A very good point! So who would be the best analogue for CJ? Britney Spears? Paris Hilton? Tom Cruise? Justin Timberlake? Any senior politician?

 

ACK!! Now, now, Echidna, Spears? Hilton? Gah!! :P

 

And a celebrity? Hrmmm... Graeme, you've posed a very unfair question! How are we supposed to know of anyone who is famous for being non-famous and quiet and shy?? That's sort of contradictory. :P

 

I'd have to say any senior politician, because as any good politician, CJ is good to avoid answering the real question, also, just like any good one he manage to hide well his hidden agenda.

 

Finally, exactly like any politician, he's needed and we can't live without his work

 

:*) Thanks... :)

 

Aww, me, a hidden agenda? 0:) Come now... And politicians are famous for putting a spin on things. I'd never do that. 0:)

  • Site Administrator
Posted
I'd have to say any senior politician, because as any good politician, CJ is good to avoid answering the real question, also, just like any good one he manage to hide well his hidden agenda.

 

Finally, exactly like any politician, he's needed and we can't live without his work

A very good analysis -- you've convinced me! Now, which politician is CJ's analogy? For the sake of avoiding political fights, I'll stick to long-dead politicians. I was thinking either Abraham Lincoln (with his desire to free all the goats... er... slaves) or Winston Churchill. Any other nominations? If we get enough interest, we might start a poll on the subject. (CJ -- if you want to cut this off at the pass, then you'd better get chapter 19 posted really soon. We're clearly in the silly-posting part of the feedback cycle now).

Posted
A very good analysis -- you've convinced me! Now, which politician is CJ's analogy? For the sake of avoiding political fights, I'll stick to long-dead politicians. I was thinking either Abraham Lincoln (with his desire to free all the goats... er... slaves) or Winston Churchill. Any other nominations? If we get enough interest, we might start a poll on the subject. (CJ -- if you want to cut this off at the pass, then you'd better get chapter 19 posted really soon. We're clearly in the silly-posting part of the feedback cycle now).

:lmao:

 

Free the goats! Free the Goats! :jerry::D

 

BTW, I'm formatting 19 now. Just got it added to the html template, and going through it and making sure all the line breaks are in the right place (sometimes they don't survive the cutting and pasting). I'll send it to Joe tomorrow. :)

 

Also, in further story news... I'm presently working on LTMP 23. I've been catching up on my writing, and we should be able to have weekly chapters from now on instead of the posting gaps we've had. I also want to thank all of you who've stuck with this story. :wub:

Posted

Late to the party!

 

That's me.

 

I don't know why I waited, other than being too busy with my other stuff and waiting, waiting, waiting for LittleBuddhaTW to post the next chapter of "When I See You Again." :(

 

Okay, this is a good story. No, really, I do have standards and those stories that don't "click" don't get read.

 

When I buy a paper book (that's paper space book, not paperback book), and if it's not something I have to read (award winners, i.e., Pulitzer, Man Booker, etc.), I'll read the first page and the last page. We don't get to do that here, so the first page has to have that hook or I'm off looking elsewhere. I'm hooked on LTMP.

 

Politician? Ron or Rich, definitely! Lyndon comes close, but he didn't like goats! :D

Posted
Late to the party!

 

That's me.

 

I don't know why I waited, other than being too busy with my other stuff and waiting, waiting, waiting for LittleBuddhaTW to post the next chapter of "When I See You Again." :(

 

Okay, this is a good story. No, really, I do have standards and those stories that don't "click" don't get read.

 

When I buy a paper book (that's paper space book, not paperback book), and if it's not something I have to read (award winners, i.e., Pulitzer, Man Booker, etc.), I'll read the first page and the last page. We don't get to do that here, so the first page has to have that hook or I'm off looking elsewhere. I'm hooked on LTMP.

 

Politician? Ron or Rich, definitely! Lyndon comes close, but he didn't like goats! :D

 

Thank you Carl!!

 

I'm having fun writing it, even though I'm a little out of my depth. I have never had an interest in the music or entertainment industries, so getting the technical background details of a rock band right has been a challenge, and I still can't guarantee the accuracy.

 

The nuclear design was far easier by comparison, though coming up with some of the details that are in coming chapters was tricky, becuase it all has to be technically feasible. (I'm rather anal when it comes to technical details). Of course, even if I could (I don't have the technical ability) I wouldn't put a totally accurate design online, so I'm not including engineering specs, and I'll fudge a detail or two.

 

The cobalt tamper mentioned for the nukes, which makes them far, far more deadly (increasing the fallout by a factor of over 100, probably closer to 1000) is actually real. Here's a Wikepedia article on it. This design is also sometimes called the Doomsday Bomb, though just a few wouldn't end life on earth.

 

BTW did anyone notice this back in Ch 16?

 


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