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JeffreyL
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Everything posted by JeffreyL
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Thank you for removing that vile suit. I'm wishing Kohen a speedy recovery (probably not likely) and some caring, friendship, romance, or love. Or maybe all of the above. More good story. Hooray for Wednesday!
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I'm not so sure I like the new Danni, but I can't wait to see where things go from here! Thanks.
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Stating the obvious, the letter must be from Cody. Hopefully Trick will read the entire letter. My guess is Cody figured it was the only way to apologize since he got tongue-tied when he saw Trick.
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This is pretty goofy and very entertaining! I'm not certain where this is going, but it was fun to read! I enjoyed the dialogue and the boy's word choices, phrases, and sayings. I want to read more just to see where this is going, but aaaaargh it is a complete short story. I hope you decide to revisit these characters. Thanks.
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I love the way Eric keeps coming up with ideas to modernize Makarovia. I feel a bit sorry for Petro. His time as Peter was short lived. I think Eric will keep him centered. Good story! Thanks .
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I know it will be OK in the end, but this is really painful. I think Ian's dad is right, if Ian didn't love Adam so much he would be over it already. Can't wait for the talk. Maybe Adam and Ian will join forces to get the baby that is coming and cut Anna out of their lives. Thanks for more good story.
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Gene's homophobia may come from his dad, but it might not be how he really feels. That is my take after his conversations with Joey in this chapter. Can we hope that Joey and Allen might be on the same page at the same time? There seems to be a lot of miscommunication between the two. And then add in the emotional flare ups. Maybe this latest conflict will actually being them closer together. More good writing; more good story! Thanks.
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There's No Place Like Home for the Hallowdays
JeffreyL commented on Cynus's story chapter in There's No Place Like Home for the Hallowdays
Your story was a lot of fun! Well done! I liked Ken a lot. Maybe he and George could show up in another story. Thanks. -
The bad thing about bingeing is at some point you get caught up. That's where I'm at, and now I practice my patience. Your story is great! I really like Peter and Eric! As several people have commented they are in for a bumpy ride ( to misquote Bette Davis). Thank you.
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Canada is a bit far for a weekend visit by a certain young Australian. Hopefully you plan to get these two guys together. Long distance can be hard on a friendship and is not usually good for romance. I'll be waiting patiently (not) to see how you solve this dilemma. I am enjoying Carlton's story. Thanks.
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Chapter 7 - I Won't Give Up
JeffreyL commented on Jordn87's story chapter in Chapter 7 - I Won't Give Up
A little romance and a big mystery make for a good chapter. Maybe next chapter you could go for more loving and some explanation, or at least a good hint of two. Thanks. -
This is a good set up. I can't wait to see how Trick has changed over the years since changing schools. Hopefully be has several friends and a lot more confidence. I hope Cody has learned how to be a friend. Since they both will have matured, at least some, it will be interesting to see what happens when they meet up again in college.
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Wow! I just caught up, and it was quite a ride! I can't wait to see what's next for Duke and Danni. Thanks.
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You posted chapter 5 yesterday, and I am just starting, so I have a bit of catching up to do. I enjoyed chapter one, and I look forward to reading more.
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Chapter 6 - Little Bit More Than Friends
JeffreyL commented on Jordn87's story chapter in Chapter 6 - Little Bit More Than Friends
Time to reveal the bad guys. I still think Brady's dad is in on it. I'll assume Brady will be OK, at least eventually. You wouldn't kill off one of your main characters in chapter 6, would you? (Rhetorical question. I don't really expect an answer.) -
So what kind of person imagines a suit so horrific? 😉 Very clever, and maybe just a bit twisted. I am looking forward to finding out more about the main character. More please.
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I am really enjoying this story! I can't help feeling bad for Joey. After shutting himself off for so long, he doesn't seem to remember how to be around people. He even vascillates in his relation to Star and Ticker. I hope events will conspire to set him on the road to happiness. I thought maybe he and Allen could support each other, but not yet.
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I like the addition of Carlton's classmates as crew members! It sounds like they are off to a good start.
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I am not a surfer, but the beach is one of my favorite places! Your poem created some great mental images for me. Thanks.
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Chapter 5 - Reuniting of Souls
JeffreyL commented on Jordn87's story chapter in Chapter 5 - Reuniting of Souls
Thanks for another chapter. I am happy that Brady and Nessay are reconnecting. I would like it to go beyond friendship. I am wondering if the mystery bad guys are working for Brady's father? -
I'm only one person, but you don't need to change a thing for me.
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I like your writing in general, but I especially like the development of Jake's and Kaiden's relationship. The back and forth seems natural especially considering all of Kaiden's insecurities. Looking forward to the party and whatever happens there.
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In one of you other stories a reader commented that you have too much description. Maybe so, but I enjoy all the detail you bring to your stories. I know less than nothing about a fishing boat, but I really get a sense of what it's like from your descriptions. Carlton is like some of your other characters: hard-working and self-reliant. I like him already, and can't wait to see where this story takes him. Thanks for a good beginning!
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I like Ivan and Katia a lot! I am hopeful there will be a "reunion" of the two couples after the cruise. Thanks for this most enjoyable chapter.
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